Authoress' Notes: Yikes. I think this is the quickest I've ever updated something. Wow. Anyway, here's chapter 1 for ya, even though FF calls it number2. Enjoy and feel free to spit on Koops/Squirt if ya like. Lol.


College Rule Pikario: The Very Old Door Thingy!

Chapter 1: Big Ass Castle and Big Ass Salamence!


Beautiful fields...

Sparkling flowers...

Fluttering Butterfree...

A Pikachu hacking up chunks of 3-day old hot dog...

Wait! What?

Pikario choked and gurgled in the Warp Pipe, as Pikella stood behind him, annoyed.

"Are you done yet?" she nagged.

Pikario lifted his head. "Yeah...stupid moldly food! DAMN WARP PIPE WITH ALL ITS SWIRLINGNESS!"

Pikella sweatdropped. "C'mon. Let's go to PeachyKeenburg already!"

"Where the hell are we now?" Pikario wondered.

"We're in PeachyKeen Meadows," Pikella answered, looking in a book.

"Just fucking great..." Pikario sarcastically mumbled.

And so, the two continued on! They faced many dangers, like, uh... FLOWER POISONING! And... getting attacked by random blades of grass! And, of course, THE DIRT WAS AFTER THEM! AHHHHHHHHHHHH! And this made them tired! OH NO! Anyway, after a while, they eventually got to PeachyKeenburg and they were greeted by a cute Koopa who really was a Squirtle! Yay!

"Welcome to PeachyKeenburg!" he greeted. "I hope you enjoy your stay and if you get eaten by the giant evil Salamence that flies around here, be sure to clean up your own blood! No one likes a messy town!"

Exhausted, Pikario sweatdropped.

"What the...? A giant evil... Salamence?" Pikella asked, panting.

"Does it have the Diamond Crystal Star?" Pikario asked.

"...the fuck? What the hell is a Diamond Crystal Star?" the Koopa wondered.

"Ah, nevermind!" Pikario scoffed, walking into a random house. "This all blows! I'm taking a nap and I'd like to see someone stop me!"

"Wait!" Pikella called after him.

The Koopa shrugged his head. "Damn hippies and their creepy voo-doo magic!"

Inside the house, Pikario had started to rampage because there was no bed in sight and he was tired! DAMN!

"Well," lectured Pikella, "that's what you get for busting into people's house unannounced!"

"Shut up, woman! I'm the master and I could make you suck me," he growled.

Pikella made a face. "You know, that had to be the most disturbing thing you've ever said..."

Pikario smiled. "Good, because I'm keeping a list of them!"

"Um...excuse me..." a small voice almost whispered!

Pikario whipped around. "What the fuck do you want? Can't you see I'm scaring someone?" This made Pikella sweatdrop.

The small voice that almost whispered belonged to a shy Koopa who looked like he'd been beaten on a regularly basis, since he had a bandage between his eyes and something was wrong with one of his eyes! OH NO!

"Do you think... you can... um...please get out of my house, please?" he asked, quietly.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Pikario bellowed, scaring the Koopa so much, he hid in his shell! WHOOPS!

"Pikario!" Pikella frowned. "That's not nice!"

"Feh..." Pikario spat, leaving.

Pikella went over to the Koopa. "Sorry for that; he's a real ass, I know. What's your name, anyway?"

Coming out of his shell, the Koopa looked around, making sure that Pikario was gone. "Um... m-m-my name? Uh.. it's Squirt..."

Just as soon as Squirt said his name, Pikario ran back in!

"Ho... lee CRAP!" he shouted, scaring Squirt again. "Your name... it's Squirt, right?"

Squirt peeked out of his shell! "Uh huh."

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SQUIRT? HAHAHAHA! OH, MAN! SQUIRT? THTA'S A GOOD ONE FOR THE LADIES TO CALL YA! HAHAHAHAHA!" Pikario was rolling on the floor, laughing his ass off!

"Shut up, Pikario!" Pikella barked, throwing her super-thick Tattle Log thing at the laughing Pikachu!

"OW, DAMN IT!" Pikario scampered away, holding his left eye in pain!

Picking up her Tattle Log, Pikella smiled at Squirt. "See what I mean? Well, I guess I'll see you later, then. Sorry to disturb you." And with, she...um...LEFT! MWAHAHAHA!

Squirt blushed. "What a nice Pikachu..."


Meanwhile, Pikella had just stepped outside, meeting up with Pikario, who was screaming his head off at a female Koopa who promptly beat the crap out of him!

"Take THIS!"

"OW!"

"And THAT!"

"OW!"

"And THIS!"

"OUCH! DAMN IT, WOMAN! THOSE ARE MY KIDS DOWN THERE!"

"I don't care!" the female Koopa shouted, beating Pikario over the head with her 4,384 lb purse!

After a while, Pikario couldn't take it anymore and shocked her with a Thunderbolt! Stunning her, he ran away, dragging Pikella with him! Afterwards, Koops came out, sweatdropping at the scene.

"Um..."

"Shut up, Squirt!"

"...but, I didn't even say anything, Koopie Koo..."

Koopie Koo shot daggers at Squirt with her eyes, of course, scaring him once again!

"Um... I'll just go... back in the house... now..." Squirt whimpered, inching back into his house.


"For the last time; WHERE... IS... A... BED?" Pikario growled at Kroops.

"Never!" the delusional mayor shouted. "Never will I let you win! Here, take my money, you cad!" He threw some coins on the floor!

Pikario massaged his head in annoyance.

"Do what you want, ruffians, but don't take the pictures of me and muh wife! She may be a psychopathic bitch, but goddamn it, she's a 'un!" Kroops barked.

"We don't want your stinkin' pictures! We want a bed!" Pikario shouted.

"...and anything you know about the Diamond Crystal Star wouldn't hurt either..." Pikella added.

"AH! HO HO! So, then, you'll be after Bluetail the Salamence; I think she has it jammed up her ass somewhere..." Kroops mused.

Pikario perked up. "Well, it's better than nothing..."

"You'll hafta go ta Shhwonk-Shaka Khan Forest to get...um... stuff!" Kroops said.

Pikella made a face.

"You guys have some serious place-naming issuses to get over..." Pikario pointed out.

NONETHELESS! Pikario and Pikella set off to Shhwonk-Shaka Khan Fortess to get the...um... STUFF! But then...

"Um, excuse me..."

Pikario whipped around to see Squirt behind him. He instantly started snickering.

"Hi, Squirt," Pikella smiled. "What's wrong?"

Squirt blushed. "Well, um..."

"What?" Pikario cut in. "Squirt? Do you need to squirt, or something?"

Pikella nudged him sharply in the side.

"Oh, nevermind... it's nothing... forget it..." Squirt mumbled, walking away.

Pikella glared at Pikario.

"WHAT?"

"You scared him, that's what!"

"No, I didn't! Look, that guy's a real kook, anyway, so let's just go to Shhwonk-Shaka Khan Fortress already!" Pikario ordered, walking off.

Pikella sighed and followed.

So, the two went on to Shhwonk-Shaka Khan Fortress, encountering several random Rock type Pokémon along the way, but Pikario threw random POW Blocks at them and they all died! HA! Eventually, they came a to a dead Thwomp! UH OH!

Pikella inspected the Thwomp. "I think it's dead..."

"No, it's not," Pikario walked up to the Thwomp, taking out his Hammer. "It just needs a wake-up call!"

So, he hit the Thwomp with the Hammer!

"GAH! NO, MOMMY! DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH BILLY AGAIN! HE'LL HURT MEEEEEEEEEE!" the Thwomp shouted, alarmed.

"What the hell...?" Pikario scratched his head in confusion.

"Eh? HUH? You! How DARE you wake MEEEE?" the Rock thing shouted.

"Where's the stuff?" Pikella asked, ignoring the threat.

"BAH! I'll tell you... If you can beat me in a quiz!"

"Sure!" Pikella grinned. "I'm good at this kind of stuff!"

Pikario sighed a mushroom cloud.

The Thwomp smiled. "Fine, then... Who Will Be Today's WEAKEST LINK?'!"

Pikario's eyes widened. "Oh, hell, no!"

Then, the stage of "The Weakest Link" appeared, with the audience, podiums, and 6 other Pokémon as the contestants!

Thwomp laughed. "MWAHOHAHAHAHA! Pathetic worms! You shall all be the Weakest Link! GOODBYE!"

Pikario looked around at the other Pokémon; there was a Koopa, a Bristle, a Boo, a Bob-omb, and...

"Chuigi?'! Peasely?'! What the fuck are you two doing here?'!"

Chuigi shrugged. "Hell if I know!"

"Well, I must say! How fun this will be!" Peasley did his trademark shine-thingy, making Chuigi go temperarily blind!

"FIRST QUEEEEEEEEEEEEESTIONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!" Thwomp boomed!

1) What is hidden here?'!

"Peasely! DO YOU KNOW?'!" Thwomp demanded.

"Of course! It is the Star Rod! I win! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Peasley boasted.

"WRONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! MWAHAHAHA!" Thwomp shouted! "YOU ARE WEAKEST LINK! GOOOOOOODBYYYYYYYYYYYYYE!"

"Ah, well!" Peasley scoffed, leaving.

"ANYONE ELSE DARE TO TRY?'!"

Pikella raised her hand! "I know! It's the stuff, right?"

Thwomp spun around! "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" he howled! "CORRECT! GAH! GAME TIME IS OVER!"

Poof! Now everything was back to normal!

"FINE!" So, Thwomp dropped the stuff and slid back into thewall!

"Thank god that's over," Pikario sighed.

Yadda yadda yadda! They took the stuff and went back to PeachyKeen Meadows! But then...

"Hey! Wait up!"

Pikario turned around to see none other than Squirt! He couldn't help but chuckle!

"What's wrong this time?" Pikella asked, going up to Squirt.

"OH, PLEASE LEMME GO WITH YOU! PLEASE! PLEASE! PRETTY PLEASE!"

Pikella jumped in surprise! "Yikes! So loud! And why do you want to come?"

Squirt smiled and blushed. "Sorry... it's just that... Bluetail ate my dad... and I want... revenge!"

"Aw, how sad," Pikella mourned. "Isn't that sad, Pikario?"

"SQUIRT!" Pikario spat, snorting with laughter!

Pikella rolled her eyes. "I suppose it's okay, then!

Squirt hopped up and down! "YAY!"

Pikella hopped up and down! "YAY!"

Pikario rolled around on the floor! "SQUIRT!"

Squirt Became a Part of Pikario's Party! He's His Second New Partner! Yay!

Name: Squirt

Gender: Male

Pokemon: Squirtle

Attitude: Timid/Shy

Ability: Using His Shell As a Projectile

Met At: PeachyKeen Meadows

Squirt is a very shy, but sweet little Squirtle with a big heart! He can use his shell's hardness to gain Defensive power and hit levers and switches unreachable by anyone else! He can also spin his shell around in one place while Pikario walks around, doing who-knows-what! Pikario can also jump on his shell to hit enemies from a distance to get the upper hand! YAY! He can use Water type attacks like any other Squirtle and is working on using an Ice Beam!

And That's All You Basically Need to Know About Your Parnter!

"Well," Pikella started, "now that that's over with, let's go to Bluetail's castle!"

"HOLD IT!"

Pikario stopped laughing! "NOW what?"

Koopie Koo walked up! "Squirt! You're not doing what I think you are, are you?"

"I dunno, Koopie... What do you think I think I'm doing?"

"NO! Your silly riddles won't save you this time! Don't be an ass, Squirt! Come back home to me; your dad's dead and Bluetail will kill you twice as fast!"

"Sorry, Koopie... I gotta do this..."

"No, you don't, damn it! Come home this instant!" Koopie Koo pointed back to PeachyKeenburg.

Squirt backed away. "This is my decision, Koopie..."

"SQUIRT!" Koopie marched up to Squirt! OH NO!

Smiling, Pikario whispered in Squirt's...um...ear? "Hey, dude! Say this to her..."

Just before Koopie grabbed Squirt's arm, heshook his fist in anger (like Pikario told him to do, of course)!

"LISTEN, WOMAN! I'M THE MAN HERE AND I COULD MAKE YOU SUCK ME!" Squirt 'threatened', so loudly in fact, it scared Koopie and Pikella!

"Ok! Ok!" Koopie pouted, leaving. "Fine then! See if I care when Bluetail eats your freaky ass!"

"Pikario!" Pikella scolded.

"WHAT? That's the perfect way to get rid of an unworthy girlfriend, and you know it!" Pikario defended.


Now with Squirt in their party, Pikario and Pikella used the stuff to somehow warp to Bluetail's castle! Don't ask how, because no one knows (or cares)!

Pikario frowned at the big lit-up sign over the door leading into Bluetail's castle. "Oh, you have GOT to be joking!"

Apparently, Bluetail wanted the place to be called "Bluetail's Super Big-Bad-Ass Much Cooler and Better Than Yours Will Ever Be Castle!"

"Well, at least Bluetail's got taste..." Pikella said.

"Yuck, I hope we don't have good taste to Bluetail..." Squirt feared.

Yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda! The 3 went through the castle, solving puzzles and crap until...

"What's that?" Squirt asked, pointing to a familiar black box.

"Not again..." Pikella groaned, remembering what happened last time.

"Hey, can you guys lemme out? I have CANDY! MWHAHAHAHA!" the box spoke!

"NOBODY TOUCH IT!" Pikario demanded, angrily.

Squirt randomly picked up a Black Key and opened the Black Box!

"YOU ASS! I JUST SAID DON'T TOUCH IT!" Pikario shouted.

"...but it said it had candy..." Squirt cowered.

"MWEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!" the box giggled! "CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURSE! YOU CAN NOW WALK SIDEWAYS AND SLIP THROUGH CRACKS LIKE THE DUMBASS PAPER CUTOUTS YOU ARE! MWEE HEE HEE HEE HEE! SUCK IT DRY!"

Then it spoke no more!

Squirt looked around. "Where's the candy?"


Yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda! Sometime later, Pikario found a special room! Opening the door, he found...

"EW!" Pikella screamed. "A rat! Kill it! Kill it!"

The Rattata scoffed. "Rat? No, no, darling. I am a Rattata. Besides, are you and your sexy man there not a rodent as well?"

Pikario cocked an eyebrow. "Sexy?"

Squirt looked around worriedly. "She's not talking about me, is she?"

"Pikachus are MICE, not RATS!" Pikella shot back.

"Whatever, hater," the Rattata scurried over to Pikario and spanked him! GASP!

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!" Pikella roared! "HANDS OFF!"

"Hmm, your ass tells me that you're looking for the mighty Bluetail, am I correct?" she questioned.

Squirt hid behind Pikella. "Yeah... we are... but how could you tell form doing... that...?"

"Because I am the famous Ms. Rwatt! Ass Fortune Teller Extrodinaire! And a MasterThief on the side." she boasted.

Pikario smirked. "That's the shit!"

"Anywho," Rwatt continued, "you'll need this badge to beat Bluetail!" She gave Pikario a badge of some sort, then kissed him!

"You little bitch!" Pikella started to go after her, but Squirt held her back!

"See you later, my hunk of cheesy ass!" Rwatt called out to Pikario, before jumping out a window!

Shocking Squirt with a Thunderbolt, Pikella jumped onto the window's ledge. "Leave Pikario alone! He's MIIIIIIIIIINE!" she called after Rwatt.


After all that shit was cleared up, the trio continued on until they got the tallest tower in the castle! Pikella also claimed she saw an eye looking at her through the tower's windows on the walk up the stairs, but Pikario and Squirt just assumed she was still a little kooky from the Ms. Rwatt incedent! Either way, they went in!

"It's so damn dark in here!" Pikario complained.

"And it stinks!" Pikella added.

"And Bluetail's, like, standing right there! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Squirt realized!

And lo and behold, Squirt was right! Bluetail was BIIIIIIIG! Well, bigger than normal Salamences, anyway...

"Who dares disturb me?'!" Bluetail roared loudly, stomping the ground! "My stomach is so very full! I don't have room for anymore! Do you know how many Koopas I just ate?'!"

"Uh...a lot?" Pikario guessed.

"674! And now, I wanna take a nap, so out with you!" Bluetail grumbled.

"No! We need to beat you for... uh... something!" Pikario threatened!

"Grr! Damn you superheroes and your stupid publicity stunts!" Bluetail growled.

ENTER BATTLE MODE! USE TEH FORCE, PIKARIO!

"I have had it up to here with you bastards always coming to my castle to 'slay the dragon'! You don't even have any mercy on women!" Bluetail snorted.

"Wait... You're a GIRL?" Pikario was shocked!

"Yeah! Can't you tell?'!" Bluetail frowned.

"Um..." Squirt blushed. "well, I'm always hiding from you, so no."

Pikella took out her Tattle Log. "That's Bluetail, and yes, she IS a girl! A big-ass Salamence, she eats a lot and flies around, farting on people...ew..."

"What?'! I'm very gassy!" Bluetail spat.

Pikario held his nose. "I'm with ya on that one..."

Squirt stepped forward. "Well, you ate my dad, and that's not very nice!" He coughed up a weak puff of ice at Bluetail, who just shook it off!

Pikario slapped the back of Squirt's head. "What the hell was that?'!"

"That was supposed to be an Ice Beam, but I kinda messed up..." Squirt blushed.

"Stand aside, bitches!" Pikario threw his Hammer at Bluetail, making a cricket sound! "What the hell...?"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! CRICKETS! NOOOOOO! I got poisoned from eating a cricket once!" Bluetail wailed.

"Man, you're such a wuss!" Pikario laughed.

"SILENCE! I shall now renew my strength!" Bluetail announced, leaving the stage.

"Now where's she going? She can't just run away like that!" Pikella wondered.

Just then, Bluetail appeared in the audience, eating most of the Shroomishes!

"Yikes!" Squirt trembled!

"..." Pikella just shook her head.

Pikario laughed! "AWESOME! A fight in the audience!"

So, the 3 jumped into the audience!

"HAH! You can't beat me now, n00bs!" Bluetail taunted.

"This is for my dad!" Squirt came up to Bluetail and used a perfect Ice Beam attack, killing her!

EXIT BATTLE MODE! HOW FUN WAS THAT?'!

"Gah!" Bluetail flipped over! "Damn you pests! Damn you and your never-ending quest to kill us dragons!"

"Wow!" Squirt beamed. "I did it!"

"But where's the Diamond Crystal Star?" Pikella looked around.

"Gah! Ugh! Bleh!" Bluetail spit out a huge shell and it landed in front of Squirt, scaring him!

"Ahh! A demon!" Squirt squealed, hiding in his own shell!

Slowly, a Blastoise emerged from the large shell and looked around!

"Who the hell's that?" Pikario asked Pikella.

"Dunno," she looked through her Tattle Log. "He's not in here..."

"MWAHAHAHAHA!" the Blastoise laughed! "Ah, it's great to be out again! I feel like a new man... turtle! MWAHAHAHA!"

Squirt reluctantly came out of his shell and gasped at the Blastoise! "DAD?'!"

"Eh? Squirt? Ah, you've grown on me, son! THAT'S THE WAY!" he playfully punched Squirt in the face, knocking him over!

"OW!" Squirt yelped, holding his nose. "I love you, too, Dad!"

"Aw!" Pikella swooned. "That's so sweet! Squirt found his daddy!"

Pikario made a peace sign. "Kudos to you, good sir!"

Pikella sighed. "Ah, well. We didn't find the Diamond Crystal Star, but at least we made little Squirt happy."

"Oh, yeah!" Squirt's dad took a big shiny STAR out of his shell! "Is this whatcha want?"

"The Diamond Crystal Star!" Pikella gasped. "How'd you get it?"

"Well, when I first fought Bluetail, I was a wimpy little Squirtle and she totally pwned my ass! HAHA! She ate me and I've been living her gut for 10 years! I found this thing and I was going to choke her with it, but it didn't work!" Squirt's dad explained.

"So, everyone is happy! And Squirt can go back home, right?" Pikella asked.

"Nope! I'm staying with you guys so I can become more powerful, like my dad!" Squirt smiled.

"Now, I'll get the star thingy," Pikario sighed, walking over to the Diamond Crystal Star.

TAAAAAAAAA-DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Pikario got the Diamond Crystal Star! His Star Power is Now 2! He Can Use the Attack "Earth Tremor"! YAY!

1234567123456712345671234567EnD oF ChApTEr!12345671234567123456712345671234567


After handing Bluetail her own ass to herself, Pikario and friends left her castle with Squirt a new Squirtle, finding his dad! Unfortunately, they still don't know where Peach is! Oh, well! We'll see if they can find her... NEXT CHAPTER! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Peach's Event!

Elsewhere, in the land of else, Peach was escorted to the great and almighty Grodius by a pair of X-Nauts!

"MWAHAHAHAHA! Oh! I mean, GACK ACK ACK ACK!" Grodius laughed, coughing violently afterwards!

"Hey, dude!" an X-Naut called out. "We, like, found the princess for you and stuff!"

"X-CELLENT! You! Tell me; where are the Crystal Stars?'!" Grodius asked.

Peach sighed. "How the hell should I know?'! I don't even have the map!"

Grodius sweatdropped. "Well, then... SHUT UP! MWAHAHAHA! GACK ACK ACK!" Lightning flashed in the background!

"Oh, boy," Peach mumbled. "Not another evil bad guy trying to take over the world..."

"Hey! You're not supposed to know that until LATER!" Grodius noticed! "That's it, young lady! GO TO YOUR ROOM!"

"Whatever..." So Peach left with the X-Nauts!

Just then, an X-Naut came on the computer screen! "Dude! I mean, Sir! I mean..."

Grodius shook his fist. "SHUT UP! Whaddya want?"

"Well, this guy named Pikario just got the Crystal Star that Bluetail had!" the X-Naut reported.

"Then get your sorry, little ass over to the Great Googly Woods and find the other one before I kill you!" Grodius threatened.

"EEP!" the X-Naut sqeuaked, signing off!

Grodius was now really pissed off! "SHADOW SIRENSSSSSSSSSS!"

Out of the floor, Beldam, Marilyn, and Vivian rose up!

"Mwee hee hee hee..." Beldam snorted. "You called?"

"Yes! Go out and kill this guy named Pikario!" Grodius shouted, giving them a randomly made picture of their target!

"Yes, we shall!" Beldam assured, snorting! "We ain't lettin' ya down!"

"GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUH!" Marilyn screamed, for some reason!

"PINEAPPLES!" Vivian also shouted, for no apparent reason!

Beldam slapped Vivian. "Shut up! When we get home, I'llmake you suck me... AGAIN!"

"Aw..." Vivian pouted. "That's no fun!"

Marilyn smiled. "GUH!"

"And now... WE BE OFF!" Beldam announced, disappearing into the dark with her younger sisters!

Grodius shook his head. "Damn Shadow Sirens..."


Bowser's Event!

Meanwhile, back in the Shroomish Kingdom, Bowser walked into his castle!

"Hello, almighty King Bowser!" a Koopatrol greeted.

"Silence!" Bowser roared, stomping down to the other end of the throne room. "And where the hell is Kammy when you need her?'!"

About that time, the Koopatrols let an exhausted Kammy in!

"Eh... ugh... bleh... gah..." she panted, walking up to Bowser. "Sorry.. for the wait... Bowser... I ain't young like... I used ta be..."

Bowser scoffed. "Could've fooled me," he replied, sarcastically.

"Anyway, Bowser!" Kammy started. "Did you know that Pikario left to go to some unknown place? Huh?"

"Unless it involved him getting his balls ripped off or him falling into a pit of lava, I don't give a damn," Bowser grunted.

"Well, it seems that someone else took Princess Peach and is holding her captive!" Kammy continued.

Bowser was outraged! "WHAT?'! NO ONE STEALS HER FOR A FUTILE REASON! ...Except for me!"

Kammy flailed her arms. "I know, my lord! It's a shame, really..."

"Anything else?"

"There's also some crap running around about some Crystal Stars...?" Kammy mumbled.

"CRYSTAL STARS?'! Aw, I want them! They sound pretty... AND POWERFUL! MWAHAHAHA!" Bowser whined. "That's it! I don't know what the hell Pikario thinks he's doing, but I'm putting my foot DOWN!"

So, the giant evil turtle walked off, only to return in his freaky Clown Car thing!

"MWAHAHAHA! This time, Pikario's gonna feel my wrath once and for ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL! MWAHAHAHA! Bowser laughed, crashing through the wall and flying away!

Kammy followed on her broom! "Lord Bowser, wait! This hunka junk can't keep up with your super fastness that great kings have!"


Authoress' Notes: Wow. I think this is probably the longest chapter I've ever written, lol! Anyway, that's it and except Chapter 2 to come very soon, as well as other updates! BTW, in case you were wondering why I made such an insignificant change to Grodus' name, it's because I really thought his name was "Grodius" until Chpater 5, when I got a really good look at it! I like the way it sounds, so I just left it that way. Also, yes Hooktail is a girl, especially since Gloomtail said "My precious little sister" in the game. One last thing, for some reason, the stupid QuickEdit won't let me put "?" and "!" together, so I had to make it look like this"?'!" for more effect. Bleh. Hope ya liked it!