Disclaimer: None of the recognizable characters and settings belong to me. They are all the intellectual property of J.K. Rowling. I'm just playing around with them for the fun of it…no monetary gain is sought.
This story is dedicated to scattered logic for her cherished friendship and all her invaluable help.
Chapter Twenty Seven: Leave TakingWhen Minerva opened her eyes once more, a very thin line of faint gray light was peeking through the draperies in place of the moonlight that had been there when she'd closed them. It was still quite early; the sun had barely crested the horizon. Not that you could see it behind the heavy layer of dense gray clouds that covered the sky from end to end and threatened to drop snow at any moment, but the day was clearly beginning and far too soon it would be time for her to go. A pang of sadness filled her heart at that thought, and she turned to look at her lover.
Severus was still asleep beside her. A smile crossed her lips as she felt his warm breath lightly caress her naked shoulder. His face looked so young and so peaceful in repose. Far too young to be sleeping with someone as old as she was. At times like these, when life reminded her firmly of the boy she once taught, she marveled that he could even see her as a sexually attractive being. Why would someone so young and vigorous want to waste his energy on an old lady like her? She could only shake her head in puzzlement and be grateful that it seemed to be so. He'd given her so much more than he realized, and she was going to miss him so very much.
More than any other person she cared about, she worried about him and hoped that he had a good long life still to live before him, but sadly, she knew that the dangerous web that he spent his life ensnared in made that more doubtful than it should be. It was going to be so hard to say goodbye to him today, but it was for the best.
If she stayed, the problems it would cause for everyone she loved would be endless, but especially for him. He simply could not be seen to defend her as he might wish, it would only compromise his position and his safety, and that must never be allowed to happen because of her. And she knew that having to pretend that he didn't care about her, didn't want to defend her, would be very hard on him to do. It would be better all around if he was never put in such an awkward position
Though she knew in her heart that she had no choice but to leave, she was still determined that last night, as wonderful as it had been, would not be her final time with Severus. With a smile on her lips, she rolled over against him, savoring the warmth of his skin against hers, and drew her hand lightly down his chest and low across his hips, slowly letting her nimble fingers tease him to attention and bring him back from the arms of Morpheus and into hers again. Once she had him moaning softly and coming to his arousal beneath her touch, she threw back the confining covers and straddled his hips. Ever so slowly, she lowered her body onto his, relishing the feeling of enveloping him bit by bit. Letting him fill her body with his, as his presence had so gradually filled her soul.
When she sat firmly atop him, she began to slowly withdraw and then return, up and down, sliding her flesh against his, slick and hot. First gently, then harder, faster, squeezing and releasing internally, forcing further low moans from his throat and bringing his body up off the sheets to eagerly meet her own.
Then without warning, he grasped her hips tightly in his strong hands and flipped her over onto her back without ever leaving the warm sheath of her body. Once successfully repositioned, he began thrusting harder and faster into her with a smile of smug satisfaction on his lips.
"It's always a contest of wills with us, Minerva," he gasped in a low intense tone. "This time I intend to have the upper hand, if you don't mind."
In response, she wrapped her legs firmly around his hips and let his strong steady rhythm continue to send her soaring as she matched his every thrust with one of her own.
"I don't mind at all, Severus. In fact, at the moment, I can't think how I'd ever want anything else," she managed to gasp out in return before she lost herself in the entwining sensations of desire and fulfillment that he inspired.
When he lay panting with release and exhaustion atop of her, she wrapped her arms tightly around his body and buried her face in his tousled hair. Somehow, she needed to burn this memory into her mind like an indelible brand so that no one could ever take it from her. The fragility of experience scared her. In the blink of an eye, you could lose a part of yourself and never know it existed. Somehow, she had to prevent that from ever happening to her again.
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Snape followed her around the sitting room, buttoning the cuffs of his coat and arguing vociferously.
"How many times do I have to point out the stupidity of your actions, Minerva?" His voice was drowning in exasperation, his tone clipped and sharp.
"As many times as you wish, Severus," she retorted as she slammed shut one of her trunks and turned her wand on a second bookcase. Calmly, she shrunk the contents of the shelves and watched as they packed themselves neatly into a second trunk at her feet.
Once this trunk was also full, she closed its lid as well and turned to face the glowering Potions master. "You are free, after all, to express your opinions as loudly and as frequently as you wish. I would never dream of stopping you. It's entirely up to you how much effort you're willing to expend on a fruitless task. Because I assure you, if your task is to get me to change my mind, it is indeed fruitless. Your arguments are falling on deaf ears. My mind is made up. I'm leaving, and that is that. You might as well accept it."
Furious at her stubborn resolve, Snape reached out and seized her by the arms, pulling her towards him. The look of pain that crossed her face when he did that, caused him to immediately regret his actions. He'd seen the rows of bruises on her naked arms, all put there by the harsh treatment of that odious cretin Ian Standish, and here he was doing exactly the same thing. Awkwardly, he dropped his hands away from her as quickly as he could; though he couldn't quite bring himself to say the words of regret, he could tell from the expression on her face that she understood.
Carefully, she laid a gentle hand on the front of his chest and looked up at him sincerely, hoping to finally make him understand. "I have to go, Severus. The die is cast. I've delayed too long as it is. Please, respect my wishes on this."
He stared down into her earnest, pleading eyes and sighed. "I'd rather save your life," he said quietly.
With a sigh of her own, she shook her head. "You don't know that my staying here would do that. The only thing I know for certain that would happen if I stay here is that Hogwarts' reputation would be dragged through the mud along with my own. If I leave, there's at least a chance to avoid that outcome. It's important to me that I not be responsible for any more pain being experienced by the people who live here. I'm sorry that I can't make you understand my position on this, but regardless, I am leaving…now. I really should've left last night."
Anger and frustration warred across his face, and he turned away from her to avoid responding. Minerva McGonagall was the most stubborn, the most frustrating, the most aggravating creature on the face of the earth, but the thought of her leaving…of most likely ending up in Azkaban sent cold shivers straight down into his soul.
Swiftly, she turned away from him as well. She'd lingered far too long here. A wave of shame engulfed her as she thought back to her behavior of the evening before. How had she ever allowed herself to give in to self-pity and misery so completely? She'd thought she was stronger than that, but apparently not.
She really should've been out of here last night. If she hadn't been so weak, if she hadn't allowed herself to wallow in drunken misery followed by grabbing as much sex as she could while the opportunity was hers, she'd have been long gone, and she wouldn't now have to argue her case over and over with Severus, who, she sometimes swore, lived for the sheer pleasure of arguing.
A final assessing glance around her sitting room showed her that everything that needed to be dealt with here had now been taken care of. All the personal belongings that she valued were snuggly packed into the two sturdy iron bound trunks that stood next to the wall, waiting to be taken away.
Leaving Severus behind, she moved purposely across the room and entered her bedroom once more. Pausing just inside the doorway, she looked around the room carefully. Most everything was packed up here as well. She bent and picked up her crumpled robe from the floor where it had fallen unnoticed sometime last night, and folding it impatiently over her arms, she laid it on top of the final trunk that stood beside the now empty wardrobe. Then she closed this one tightly, too. That should be that.
Three trunks full of possessions. Her entire life's worth of belongings had been reduced to three trunks full of possessions. Nothing else that remained in her rooms was of any importance. Most of the furnishings had come with the rooms when they'd been given to her so many years ago, and what other pieces she'd added on her own, such as her desk, could stay for the room's next occupant to make use of. She'd hardly need them where she was going anyway.
Much the same could be said for the rest of her possessions as well, of course. She wouldn't be allowed to keep her books and treasures. Not even her clothes would be allowed in Azkaban, but she could hardly leave them here. And this allowed her to keep the fiction alive in her mind for just a little while longer that she was leaving here to go home instead of to prison.
When she turned around from a final perusal of her bedroom, she found Snape watching her quietly from the doorway. He'd donned his robe and now appeared as he always did, enveloped in blackness, buttoned up to the hilt. Slowly she approached him, and they stood face to face without saying a word. Then she reached out her hands and laid them lightly on either side of his thin face. His skin felt cool to the touch, pulled tight over angular cheekbones, and slightly bristly where he'd probably missed a few whiskers in his haste to rid himself of them while arguing with her at the same time.
They stared at each other for a long silent moment, then he opened his mouth to speak, but she shook her head and whispered, "No, no more argument, Severus. Please."
So instead, he reached out and gently pulled her against him, and the two of them simply stood there holding on to each other without speaking. Minerva snuggled her face deeply into his robes and inhaled the unique scent of him as she enjoyed the warmth of his arms around her and the feeling of his face pressed against her hair. Moments lengthened, and intertwined, and spun themselves out until somehow Minerva found the strength within her to wrench herself out of his arms for the last time.
"I have to go. It's already gotten far too late. People will be at breakfast by now," she stated quietly.
Snape merely nodded. There simply didn't seem to be anything else he could say that would be of the slightest use. Obviously, he couldn't stop her leaving by anything short of taking her prisoner, and though the thought had its appeal, he knew it was nothing but a fantasy. She was leaving. She was plainly determined, and she had that right. He was only wasting his time and his breath to continue the argument. Instead, he should escort her to the door, see her safely on her way, and go directly to Albus, hoping that somehow there would still be something that he could do to halt things before they went too far.
Minerva moved briskly across the room towards the door, nervously smoothing her hair back into place and running her eyes over her rooms for a final time.
"Will you do me a favor, Severus?" she asked.
He nodded. "If I can."
"Please, have my things sent after me to my home. I'd rather not be burdened by them now, or take the time it would take to arrange for them to be sent. I'd appreciate it."
"Very well. I'll take care of it once you've…gone," he said, hesitating only slightly.
"Thank you." She smiled up at him gratefully.
Then, before she could find another reason to delay any further, she opened the door and went out into the corridor. Snape followed after her, and the two of them moved off down the corridor together in somewhat uncomfortable silence.
Despite Minerva's concern that she'd delayed far too long, the castle was still very quiet at this early hour. The biggest rush of students heading towards the Great Hall for breakfast would probably not occur for at least ten minutes. Which should leave her plenty of time to get away unseen, she hoped.
Once they'd moved to the main staircase and started down without running into anyone other than a few stray cats, Minerva also began to feel better about Severus accompanying her. She didn't want anyone to be wondering why he'd have been visiting her rooms at such an early hour and to possibly come to the conclusion that he'd actually come for a visit the night before. The last thing he needed now was for someone to begin to suspect a relationship between them. Her reputation would soon be tattered beyond repair; there was no need to compromise his as well.
As they started down the last flight of stairs, Snape finally broke the silence that had fallen between them.
"It's not too late to change your mind, you know. We can turn right around and head up to Albus' office immediately."
Minerva sighed and then shot the Potions master a sharp glance. "And what do you plan to tell him when he asks you why we didn't come to him last night?"
Snape shrugged and lifted an eyebrow. "I'll just tell him that you were insatiable, and I couldn't get to my clothes."
Abruptly, Minerva stopped halfway down the staircase and simply stared at him with an incredulous expression on her face for a moment before bursting into laughter. Just the thought of the look on Albus' face if Severus ever said anything of the kind to him was enough to keep her smiling to herself for weeks. Never did she think she'd laugh at anything again. Thank goodness, she was wrong. Gratefully, she clutched at Snape's arm and smiled up at him. "Thank you for that, Severus. Thank you."
"You're still determined to leave though, aren't you?" he asked as she released him and continued down the stairs towards the entrance hall, and he followed along.
"Yes, you know that I am. Please, let's just not talk about this anymore."
They reached the ground floor together and Minerva headed for the closet to retrieve her cloak. Grumbling under his breath about stubborn, foolhardy Gryffindor females, Snape continued to trail after her and stood glowering darkly with his arms crossed as she removed her cloak from the closet and spread it across her shoulders.
Suddenly, there came a loud knocking on the front door to the castle. Minerva's head snapped up, and she turned towards the sound with a gasp. Oh, no. Was she already too late? Another five minutes and she'd have been gone. Surely, it couldn't be the Aurors. Not now. Would fate really be that cruel? Foolish question. Fate hadn't exactly been showing her any partiality lately.
Both Snape and McGonagall stood frozen in place without moving. They both looked nowhere but at the door, but at the same time, neither was able to take a step forward to go and open it.
Argus Filch came stomping across the entrance hall, glaring daggers at the two of them as he went and muttering under his breath about the high and mighty who obviously thought themselves too good to answer the damned door. After all, what was he here for if not to perform all the menial tasks for those whose magical abilities set them above common folk like squibs?
Still glaring angrily at the two professors, he hauled open the door and then turned to snap at the two large figures that filled the open doorway.
"Yes? What do you want at this time of the morning? Most visitors come at a sane hour."
A loud voice echoed around the hall. "We're looking for Minerva McGonagall."
The sound of her name spurred Minerva into action. Swiftly, she withdrew her wand from her pocket and pressed it into Snape's hand. "Please, keep this for me, Severus. They'll only destroy it, and I…well, it's always been an especially good one. I'm sure that you could make use of it somehow if I don't return."
Snape frowned at the unpleasant thought that she might leave permanently, but instead of commenting, he simply nodded and glanced at the wand briefly before sliding it into his pocket. After he did that, Minerva smiled once more at him and squeezed his arm gently, then she turned away from him towards the two men who had already forced their way past Filch and into the entrance hall. They glanced around swiftly and when their eyes lit on her, one of them pointed accusingly and stated, "Minerva McGonagall, in the name of the Ministry of Magic, I place you under arrest for the crime of murder. Don't try to resist us, it will only make it worse for you."
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Next Chapter: Minerva leaves Hogwarts.
