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aperfectattitude: Thank you very much and very good guess by the way. ;-)

Chapter Five

Rinse and Repeat

Dark Alleyway: London, England

Foaly cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Hey, um, what's the favor? I'll see what I can do," he repeated nervously. Artemis' smile was unfaltering.

"I need a blue rinse," Artemis said and Holly who had been listening on the same line jumped back in, dividing the screen in two.

"WHAT? No way are we giving you a blue rinse, Artemis! That's Fairy Technology," she leaned in closer to the screen. "You remember what happened last time you tried to sell Fairy Technology, right?"

"Yes, but I'm not going to sell it. If you don't want to give me a blue rinse out right, then just give me the plans for one," Artemis stared at Foaly, attempting to ignore Holly.

"Artemis… I can't do that; it's against regulations, rules, the whole way of Fairy society. Do you realize how much trouble I could get into?" Foaly quietly warned and this time, Artemis' smile was replaced with a deep set scowl.

"Trouble you could get into? Perhaps you haven't been watching our news as carefully as I thought you were. We're in trouble right now! At the rate this war is going, it's not going to stop until both sides are dead," Artemis slid down the wall into a crouched position, hovering over the communicator. "I need this Foaly. This isn't for me. This is to put Atomic bombs out of use. A blue rinse is better, it doesn't decimate cities and it doesn't leave radiation, and its at least a quick death," Artemis swallowed, his throat was getting dry again; he coughed into his sleeve. "So are you going to give it to me or not?" Artemis asked coldly. Both Foaly and Holly looked incredibly unhappy, fittingly so.

"I'm sorry, I can't…" Foaly managed to get out and Artemis' face relaxed into an even more frightening face; his eyes half closed and his jaw slightly loosened.

"If I don't get the blue rinse," he leaned onto the wall and straightened his back, "The I will reveal the Fairies to the world," he whispered cruelly.

"You wouldn't dare!" Holly squealed, she could not believe this. His ebony eyes only darted at her for a second.

"I would, and people would believe me. I have evidence, enough to convince even the most skeptical of scientists, not that there are any left, and I'm Master of Science, I have the power to just go on screen at any moment and have the attention of the whole world," his eyes narrowed and his lips thinned. He let his threat sink in. "So how about it now?" he flipped open his cell phone. "Do I call my assistant and have him set up my next speech?" Artemis tilted his head to the side.

"Artemis…" Holly muttered and Foaly contemplated in silence. Artemis gave a vampire smile and reached over to his open laptop, pressing a few keys unseen by either Fairy.

"Artemis, I - hey!" Foaly swirled around in the swivel chair as alarms went off around him.

"Warning - warning - hacker alert - hacker alert," one of Foaly's computer's calm voices stated. Foaly spun on the communicator.

"Artemis, you!" he yelled and began to type furiously on his side, but then he was interrupted again.

"Warning - warning - virus alert - virus alert," came the computer for a second time.

"What in Frond's name!" Holly squealed as their communicator screens began to go out of focus. Artemis took his communicator off his lap and reached for his laptop. He then began to do what he did best, hack. While Foaly was busy battling the virus, Artemis bypassed him and began the download.

"Illegal download in progress," Foaly's computer reported and Artemis' devious smile twitched.

"Artemis, stop this right now or I'll fry your computer!" Foaly warned and Artemis only glanced at the communicator for a second before hitting a button and disconnecting triumphantly.

"Download complete," Foaly's computer stated and Foaly squealed, returning to the communicator.

"Artemis, don't you dare make those rinses! Do you realize what you're going to do? You're going to unleash the perfect murdering bomb upon your civilization! Thousands will die," Foaly protested and Artemis removed a disk from his computer. He turned back to the communicator after emailing copies of the plans to several of his accounts.

"You think I don't know that? Thousands have already died, and will die. Now it's just a question of how many," he said as he waved the disk in front of the screen. "But now you don't have to worry, your precious secret Haven is safe with me," he winked and terminated the call. Almost immediately the device began to vibrate with a return call. Artemis held the shaking communicator in his had and stared at it for a moment, just a moment, before throwing it in the wall in front of him, shattering it into dozens of pieces. He pushed his a few strands of black hair out of his eyes before striding out of the alleyway, and hurrying back to the Protectorate's building; he had some organizing and production to do.

Foaly leaned back in his chair with a shocked look plastered on his face. Artemis had first hacked into his system and deposited a deadly virus within the inner workings of Foaly's network. Then while Foaly was busy taking care of the virus, Artemis had downloaded the plans for the blue rinse. Foaly ground his teeth and prepared himself for what he had to do. He pressed a button on the intercom.

"Hello? This is Foaly, get me the Tribunal."

Holly was fuming as she zoomed over Ireland. She had just finished completing the ritual when that vile call from Artemis came through. She was on her way to London, ready to punch him in the face and steal back those plans. However, there were other plans afoot, apparently.

"Captain Short, come in, this is Commander Kelp," Trouble's voice crackled over her helmet's communicator.

"This is a bad time Trouble, I'm gonna go and kick that little Mud Boy's butt," Holly growled and Trouble yelled over the communicator, making Holly bob in her flight path.

"Negative! Do not make contact with the Mud Man! Meet me at the French chute, and that's a direct order, Captain!" Trouble commanded and disappeared. Holly cursed and swerved to meet her commanding officer. Holly sat near the exit of the chute for a half an hour before calling Ops.

"Foaly, where's everybody! I should be stealing back those plans of yours," she called over the communicator and Foaly sighed.

"I know, I know, but Trouble's just having a little trouble… hehe… with the Tribunal," Foaly explained and Holly's ears twitched.

"The Tribunal? They're in on this too now?" she asked.

"I had to tell them that Artemis had um," Foaly coughed, "stolen my plans for the blue rinse, and boy were they mad," Foaly whistled. "They're still arguing on what to do," he added and Holly let out a frustrated sigh.

"Why? All we have to do is go and get the stupid plans," she stated and then apologized after Foaly's hurt hey! "But knowing the Tribunal this could take hours, hours we don't have. Who knows how fast that Mud Boy is going to put his schemes into action?" Holly cried and shook her head.

"I know, but we have to be patient, besides Artemis needs time to get the resources and put it all together anyway. And that's supposing he's still fluent in Fairy Language and can read my notes," Foaly said with a smile and a nod. Holly was not reassured.

Hovering over Berlin, Germany

Artemis sat in his military helicopter, the picture of composure. He did not stare out the windows, he did not fidget, he only stared straight ahead. In his lap he held a strange device, much like a phone, but with only a microphone and no earpiece. His assistant next to him however, was not as composed as he got off a real cell phone.

"Master Fowl sir, the Empire has responded to your speech," the assistant practically yelled over the engines of the helicopter.

"And?" Artemis replied quietly, letting his assistant struggle to figure out what he had said.

"They've bombed London, sir," the assistant replied; Artemis took a deep breath and nodded.

"Are the carriers in place?" he asked, for the first time looking out the window of the helicopter. They were just within the clouds and out of sight of the ground. Only with Artemis' Global Positioning System could they be sure of their location. Artemis studied the convoy that surrounded him. Directly next to his helicopter was a carrier jet, and on the other side of the carrier jet was another helicopter, in front of the carrier jet was Artemis' own personal jet, and surrounding the four was a whole squadron of fighter jets.

"Yes sir," his assistant replied, raising his phone to his ear, readying to relay commands.

"Tell the carriers to drop their cargo, now," Artemis ordered and listened as the man repeated his words into the phone, rather loudly. Artemis watched as the bottom of the carrier slowly opened and a seemingly very small object fell from the jet. His eyes followed the package down until he could no longer see it. There was a long pause as the assistant waited for confirmation from the phone.

"The packages have reached the ground, sir," the assistant reported and Artemis turned on the strange device in his hands, and brought it up to his mouth, still staring at the clouds below.

"I warned you," Artemis whispered into the receiver. There was no sound, nor a brilliant flash of light that pierced through the clouds, but within ten seconds Artemis stopped looking down. "Tell the pilots to bring our convoy down; it's safe," he ordered. His assistant stared at him incredulously for a moment but then reconsidered protesting and relayed his boss' orders. The assistant stared out the window as they broke through the clouds and cried out.

"Pull back up, the cities still standing, and the anti-aircraft guns are still there!"

"No, we'll land now. Tell the pilots to proceed with landing. Do not fear the weapons, they are not manned," Artemis said coolly. His assistant was shaking now, but told the pilots to continue their descent. Artemis sighed as they landed safely.

Near Orléans, France

Holly stood as Trouble and a whole LEPrecon unit stepped out of the chute. She walked over to them and looked them over. They were all armed to the teeth.

"What's going on?" Holly asked Trouble directly. He looked around.

"The Tribunal has made it's decision. We are to retrieve Foaly's stolen plans, and assassinate Artemis Fowl once and for all," he stated and Holly took an involuntary step back with a gasp.

"What?"

"You heard me Captain," Trouble said somewhat sternly. "The Tribunal has decided that this is the last straw with Fowl; he's too dangerous. You were on the line when he threatened to reveal the entire Fairy World. We have to dispose of him," Trouble explained but Holly shook her head.

"No, he, that was a bluff," she stammered, "It was just a distraction while he - "

"Hacked into Foaly's databases, set loose a virus and stole plans for a killer bio-bomb," Trouble listed, and Holly had to admit, it sounded pretty bad but she thought of something else.

"But he's a global figure now, won't the Mud Men notice if we suddenly pop up and kill him?" she asked.

"The Mud People are in a war now, they'll just assume it was the enemy and they'll keep fighting, no more the wiser of us," Trouble replied and Holly gulped. "Come on, Fowl's in Germany and he'll surely have the plans on him," Trouble activated his wings and the others did the same, only Holly paused.

"Wait, isn't he at war with Germany?' she asked.

"I don't know, but he's there, so we're following, come on," he motioned, and he and the others shielded and took off. After a slight pause, Holly followed in suit. She ground her teeth as she flew. How could Artemis do this, she thought. He was changed, he was even going straight, last time she had talked to him. Now he was back to blackmailing the Fairies to his advantage and exposing humans to Fairy Technology. What was he thinking?

Berlin, Germany

Artemis cleaned some imaginary dirt from his sunglasses before donning them back on. He stood on top of the Reichstag, his helicopter turning off its engines behind him on the roof. There was no movement except that of the few men of the two helicopters that had landed with him and the jets above. Artemis looked over the courtyard and saw his few men studying the few still bodies that littered the grass. Artemis turned around and went to the glass dome, to look in at the German Government, or what used to be the German Government. Delegates still sat at the desks, and a speaker lay slumped on the podium. Artemis closed his eyes and walked back to the edge of the roof. His assistant ran towards him.

"Master Fowl sir, it's amazing. Everyone's dead, just dead! Looks like they dropped dead in the middle of whatever they were doing," the assistant was out of breath. Artemis looked to the sky and watched his jets zoom over head.

"Of course, the blue rinse immediately stops the heart of all living organisms within range; death is instantaneous, it doesn't leave a scratch on the structures and completely consumes itself, leaving no trace behind," Artemis whispered into the wind.

"Is this what it'll be like in all the cities then?" the assistant asked wide-eyed, and Artemis sullenly nodded.

"Bloody hell…" the assistant looked out at the city. Artemis closed his eyes, he had seen enough. The city was intact, but not a single person stirred.

"What in Frond's name…?" Trouble whispered as they slowed over Berlin. Not a single car in the streets moved, and people laid strewn about the sidewalks.

"He's already used it…" Holly remarked incredulously. "But, I've never seen a blue rinse of this proportion…" she gasped.

"Bad news guys," Foaly's voice came over all their communicators. "That wasn't the only one," and several human news flashes appeared on the screens of their helmets. "Berlin, Tokyo, Moscow, Shanghai, and Pyongyang; all were hit with blue rinses at the same exact time," Foaly reported.

"How did Fowl get five blue rinses? I thought you said he would still have to gather the resources," Trouble asked.

"Well, I did a little looking into Fowl's recent orders and he got the preliminary parts of the blue rinses a week ago…" Foaly replied.

"That doesn't make any sense…" Holly whispered but Trouble cut her off.

"Look out, Mud Men jets!" and the fairies spread out to make way as the jets ripped past them.

"See that skinny jet alongside the carrier?" Foaly's voice reappeared, "That's Fowl's private jet," he explained and Trouble nodded to one of the other fairies.

"So if we blow that to pieces then we're good, right?" he asked, but there was no confirmation, it was understood. "Right then, Birch, you know what to do," Trouble waved at the fairy. The other fairy named Birch nodded, and brought out a mini-grenade launcher. Holly was about to voice a protest but he went ahead and pulled the trigger without a hesitation. Holly could only watch wide eyed as the private jet was engulfed in flames and the others around it peeled away startled.

Artemis tore his gaze away from the quiet scene below to the frantic one above. The helicopter pilots ran back to their controls and the rest of the men investigating scurried back to their transports. Artemis' assistant tugged at his sleeve and only then did Artemis begin to hear him.

"Please, Master Fowl sir, we have to get to safety!" he cried. Artemis stared at him for a moment then replied.

"What makes you think the skies are safe when it is there that my plane was just shot?" and with that he jerked his arm out of his assistant's grasp and narrowed his eyes at the sky near his plane. He pushed his sunglasses up his nose and sure enough, there were several unidentified flying objects near the original position, far too small to be any helicopter, and far too stationary to be any jet. Artemis put out his hand. "Give me my bag," he ordered and the assistant complied, bringing Artemis a rather large duffle bag. Artemis rummaged through it for a moment before finding a flare gun. He shot the flare directly above his head, much to his assistant's dismay.

"Look, there!" one of the fairies pointed and all stares drew to the light above the Reichstag. "A helicopter," he added and Holly had her lenses zoom in on the roof.

"Artemis…" she whispered as they focused on one of the two figures.

"A decoy, the plane was a decoy," Trouble realized.

"There's our target," one of the fairies squealed and the unit began to dive towards him, without Holly or Trouble's permission.

Artemis watched as a whole unit of LEPrecon Officers plummeted towards him. He let a small smile creep onto his face, a real one. Holly and Trouble quickly caught up with the other fairies.

"HOLD ON YOU IDIOTS!" Holly yelled into the communicators. The fairy unit stopped a few hundred feet away. "This is either a trap, or he wants to talk with us," Holly gasped. "Either way, don't shoot him just yet," she ordered and Trouble stared. She blinked and looked back at him. "Trouble please you've got to trust me on this," she pleaded. There was a moments pause before he minutely nodded.

"Alright, but if he tries anything funny," Trouble hefted his Neutrino to get the idea across.

"Okay," Holly agreed and they proceeded, at a more regulated pace to the roof. Artemis watched as the fairies slowly descended to the roof, still shielded.

"Would you please go get on the phone with headquarters and inform me when we get any updates?" Artemis asked his assistant without taking his eyes off the fairies. His assistant glanced around a bit confused, but then nodded and left for the helicopter, where his phone was. "Hello Holly."

Author's Note: Whew, this chapter took a long time to write. I'm not sure why... Hold on for the next chapter, I'm not sure how soon I'll be able to write it considering I have a bunch of exams to study for... eheh. But we are nearing the end my friends! Mwahahaha!