Disclaimer: These characters are not ours. We're just playing with them. The companies & people they belong to can have them back when we are done. We hope not to break them. No promises though.

This story is pre-slash. Meaning before Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter become involved in a more-than-friends relationship.

Constructive criticisms are much appreciated. Flame us if you want, but spell check them first. Please.

Ashlee's LJ: www (dot) livejournal (dot) com / users / ashleeblue
Andrea's LJ: www (dot) livejournal (dot) com / users / andoria (underscore) sama


Don't Move

Chapter 1/4: The Beginning of the Beginning

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It is not fair to say that everything starts with himself, but that is how his story starts.

He should have cared that his godfather was dead and he did, in a way. He tried to care the way he thought he should, but he was much too selfish. He cared that he would never see Sirius again. He cared that Sirius was gone, but he could not bring himself to care what Sirius would have thought or felt. Was that the way he would have wanted to die? He didn't want to think about that.

He wanted to ask someone how he should feel. He wanted to scream and shout that it was his fault that Sirius died. He wanted to believe that he was to blame, but he couldn't feel guilty. He wanted to blame Snape for goading Sirius into leaving the house, he wanted to blame Dumbledore for not stopping him, he wanted to blame the world for being something that he didn't want it to be.

The more Harry thought about what he should feel, the more Harry detached himself from what he did feel. He couldn't blame himself for wanting to protect his godfather. He couldn't blame Snape because he did inform the order or they wouldn't have known that Harry left. He couldn't blame Dumbledore because he wasn't there.

Harry couldn't stand that he couldn't save his godfather. He didn't want to think about the what-ifs. The more he tried to think of other things the more he... forgot. When, finally, he couldn't remember what the date was or what he had done the day before, he knew things had happened but couldn't remember how they'd happened. Finally, summer was over and when Ron asked what he'd done over break he couldn't remember, and he didn't care to. It seemed so unimportant what he'd done for his birthday and he could not recall what gifts his friends had given him.

Hermione asked him how he lost so much weight but he couldn't remember having eaten. He couldn't remember how his relatives had treated him. He didn't remember writing letters to the order though he knew he had. But it didn't matter, it wasn't important.

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Tsuzuku(to be continued)


Author's Note: This is our first fic. R&R is good.