-Chapter 2, Winter 2010-2011

--December 2010 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

God I'm dieing here. I don't even want to imagine Christmas without Don and Raph. Things are too quiet. WAAAAY too quiet! I'm practically SUFFOCATING on SILENCE here! ...Ok got that out of my system...

-Mikey

--December 2010 Leonardo

It has been very quiet lately, very still. I can almost FEEL Michaelangelo's energy threatening to explode. He's been so much calmer and quieter lately, but the more I see him like this, the more I can feel his usual energy building to dangerous extents underneath the surface. He does not like the state of things, of that I am a good deal certain. However, even master Splinter seems restless. I fear it even feels as if he is growing distant.

--December 2010 Raphael

Well I'm in Texas now and things are kinduh weird. Nothing I didn't expect though. The people that Mary and me moved in with are really awkward around me. The ol' man seems to be a really nice guy though. He's gotta be though since he's letting his daughter's friend and a total stranger live in his house. The ol' guy runs some kinda bar or club or somethin' that's not too far away from here.

His daughter Rhonda already seems like she'd as soon kill me as hafta look at me. I dunno if it's that I'm a stranger so she doesn't trust me that much, that I'm a guy, that I'm with her friend, or that I'm a strange guy with her friend. I'd guess it's the first and third parts though...since Mary says she's a lot like me. I can already tell it's going to be a /real/ barrel of monkys being around THAT girl. Too bad sarcasm don't stand out as much on paper.

--December 2010 Donatello

Things are still going rather slowly. That isn't any sort of surprise. People are getting ready for Christmas now. It will be awkward this year... I'll be spending this Christmas with humans, and all of them are people I hardly know. I certainly can't afford any gifts.

It's almost as if I have gone from Christmas for the poor to Christmas for the clinging to life. On the bright side of things, more and more people seem to be getting accustomed to having me around. Of course, it's coming about slowly but I am being treated normal by more of the people here. I am going to stop writing my thoughts and go to sleep now.

--December 2010 Raphael

Mary took me out shopping today. Something wasn't right, but I didn't notice anything wrong either. Things just felt funny I guess. It WAS my first time getting Christmas presents out in the open, away from home, without the guys. Eh, either way nothing happened so it must notta been important.

Mary's giving Rhonda and her old man Emory gifts from 'both' of us. Of course everyone's going to know they're from her, I don't have a job and no one's expecting me to get one with me being a mutant and all. It's like being mutant is a handicap. They either think ya can't work, won't work, or no one will hire ya. Part of me likes it. If no one is expecting feces, no one's going to be disappointed and giving lectures and all that feces.

On the other hand I want to beat someone senseless for acting like I'm not AT LEAST just as good as any old human.

--December 2010 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

I guess shopping for two people is easier than shopping for four. Except I'm left with two of the harder ones to shop for. Maybe dad could use a new tea set and maybe Leo needs a new candle holder. No and no again. They'd probably kill if they got gifts like that. New incense burners? That should work, but I still need more...

I don't even know if they like the things I get them, but I'm not sure of what to get them. I could get Leo some new ink bottles. Yeah, maybe that'll do it. What about Master Splinter though? Guess I'll answer that when I go shopping. Things are still pretty boring here.

-Mikey

--December 2010 Leonardo

It feels so strange only having to shop for Michaelangelo and Master Splinter. Sometimes I still get us too much when I go out for food. I got Michaelangelo some game he has been drooling over. Lately I have been putting lots and lots of work into a painting for Master Splinter. I hope it is good enough in the end to serve as a good gift. If not I will do my best to get him a nice kimono.

We are going to be decorating sometime soon. Things likely will not be so happy this year. Michaelangelo seems different. As I said, it is like he will eventually explode, but he also seems, dimmer I suppose. Like his energy is being drained into the coming explosion. I certainly am not very happy either. It is a wonder how the holiday will effect things, none the less.

--December 2010 Donatello

No Christmas gifts this year...and that's alright. I haven't exactly earned ANYTHING. It was almost silent today. Everything was so inanimate...so different than usual. I couldn't do much in my current position, so I've been using my time to think of what I can do later.

I've decided that I'll put money into searching for Baxter. Ever since what happened between us, he's been like a ghost. It's almost ironic, seeing as to how I've made somewhat of a ghost of myself. Over the years I've realized that there's a lot a like between us.

The main difference is Baxter is too confident and I would never stoop to his level of disrespect for others in general. I'm rebuilding my life from scrap and if I can help it, I'll never have to use my ninjitsu for anything more than defense again.

From now on, if I enter a battle, I will enter it with words. If I cannot simply use my words, then I'll find other ways. As much as some people should be punished, I never really enjoyed coating my hands in someone's blood. From now on, I'll coat my hands in their shame instead. If I can help it, Baxter will be my first and only victim.

--December 2010 Raphael

Christmas was actually more fun than I thought it would be. Mary, Rhonda, Emory, and me all went to some party Emory was throwing in his bar. Everyone I noticed was drunk off their butt, except the old man, Emory. A few people were so drunk /they/ hit on /me/. We all had a good time and then came back home and opened crap once we were sobered up a bit.

I gotta admit that I missed Master Splinter and the guys, even Leo. I kinda wanna write to see how things are going. I'm not going to though, because I know it'd all just be depressing. So there's no point. Maybe I'll do it later.

--December 2010 Leonardo

This Christmas was horrible. Michaelangelo did not bother to do anything this year aside from buying presents. He was not himself the entire time. The three of us just sat at the table, awkward and quiet. I tried to lighten the mood and I tried to cheer him up, but I cannot succeed where he excels.

A train is coming... I am standing hopelessly to the side of the tracks, waving my arms in attempt to get attention... And my family is about to perish in the collision.

--January 2011 Raphael

New Years wasn't much different than Christmas except for the presents. I really do like it here. The house is great, the bar is great, the town is great, Mary is great, Emory is great. Rhonda is the only thing that gets under my skin right now. Make that Rhonda and thinking about how things went with Donny.

Me and Rhonda just can't seem to get along. It's almost just like it was between me an Leo, only without the whole Leo being the "boss" problem.

--January 2011 Donatello

It's the month of the new year. So many people go on about how it's a new start. Usually I'd think of how preposterous that sounded. You can't become a completely different person just because another year has rolled around. How many broken friendships mend because people were given a 'clean start' because of the new year.

New Years meant so much more to me this year than the years prior, however. I'll have a job soon. No longer will I be just be some mutant ninja living in a sewer. I may be too busy to write any normal entries in this journal for a time.

I'm trying to get two or three different jobs. This is something that I know will be difficult. As much as I've grown to like this shelter, however, I can't stay forever. It's annoying hard to get privacy sometimes anyway.

--January 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear diary

New Years Eve...heh... It seems like such a waste this year. There's nothing to celebrate right now. I'm still trying to smile for Leo and dad, but it's harder now than it was before. It's hard not to think about Don and Raph with them gone.

Funny how much you notice the little things about people when they aren't around. Things like how Don's keyboard usually seemed like part of the 'silence' of the lair. You know, like how when everyone goes silent at once they can hear the clocks ticking (if any are around in the first place).

I used to write to you a lot more before all this mess started. There just isn't much to talk about anymore...

-Mikey

--January 2011 Leonardo

I am both happy and disappointed today. Master Splinter claims he can no longer teach me. He says he has taught all he knows. I cannot be done yet. I must be missing something. Surely I do not know as much as Master Splinter knows. It is certain that I do not think my master has lied to me.

However, I will try to continue my training. There must be ways I can learn more.

--January 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

I saw something on tv again today. This whole humanity getting used to mutants bit surprises me more all the time! Apparently some art school in California has opened it's doors to mutant students. Ok...after that I KNOW there's got to be more than just us five...or four of us. I'd go there but I don't really know where it is and I don't exactly have much money... They did say it WAS pretty cheap for mutants though. Hopefully if I keep a look out I can find more information.

Could be a way out of this place. It's not like Leo and dad really need me... I still kind of feel like I should be here for them though.

-Mikey

--January 2011 Raphael

Rhonda can be such a bitch. Outta no where she started threatening me about Mary. She was insulting me and saying I better be good to Mary. What the hell? I aint done crap to Mary and I don't know why she suddenly thinks I will now. That woman's lucky she's not a guy or I mighta smacked her around like a rag doll.

--January 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

I was looking into that place in California and decided that I'm going out there for the Spring. It was difficult and it took a long time for me to decide. Leo and Splinter will be fine with out me. I still have over a month to talk to dad and Leo about it...

-Mikey

--February 2011 Raphael

I've never been into the whole valentines day crap. Not like I ever had a reason to before anyway. I still think it's stupid NOW. Mary's into it though. So I spent the night out with Mary.

It was actually kinda nice, being all out on our lonesome like that. Not fun... but nice and peaceful... Something I should probably do more often. It's not my thing though...

--February 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

They should call today "Make single people feel like crap" day. I've always hated Valentines day. No one knows that, but there's a lot no one knows. It's not like I have a girl friend...not like I'll ever get one. Despite all the opening up to mutants stuff the humans are probably still going to hate me.

Yet everywhere I look...of course pictures and video of couples doing things are shoved at me. Valentines day is a crock enough on it's own. I can't help but wonder if it's just me that feels like this. Do humans feel like they're being reminded of what they think they can't have?

-Mikey

--February 2011 Donatello

Things are fairing well. I almost have enough to afford a place of my own. I would find it surprising to earn so much money so fast. Until I remember that I am not spending much beyond money for food. Hardly remembering to eat makes that quiet cheap. On top of that I am used to living with others. I own hardly anything now and I buy just as much.

Soon I will have a place of my own and I think I am already being considered for a promotion. Soon I should check into security. I still do not feel safe amongst the humans.

--February 2011 Leonardo

Since Master Splinter stopped teaching me I have been practicing many different things on my own. I cannot seem to find anything that keeps my interest, but I am trying hard. Master Splinter seems quite tired these days. It is as if he longs to be outside, but fears the outside world.

He has still been training Michaelangelo sometimes, as Michaelangelo is a bit behind me. It seems even harder to focus Michaelangelo, however. He usually is goofing off, but for a while now he has just been lost in thought. I am worried over what he may be thinking so hard of.

Maybe I should speak with him tomorrow?

--February 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

Seems I've been a bit transparent lately. That or Leo just noticed because he has a lot more free time now. He asked what was going on with me. I couldn't tell him because I wasn't expecting him to ask. So I'm still trying to plan the explanation in my head. I told him I'd tell tomorrow.

I've been struggling to finish the last of my ninjitsu training before I go. Things seem more difficult now. I don't know if I can cut it at this rate.

I'll never be a good ninja.

-Mikey

--February 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

I told them I was leaving. They took it easily enough. I wonder if I should be happy about that or not. Either way my plans are becoming solid now.

I'll take a train to California, and I already know what luggage I'm taking. All that's left is the buying the ticket and getting something to carry the luggage in.

-Mikey

--February 2011 Leonardo

I expected Michaelangelo would eventually leave too. At least he is going for good reasons AND he gave fair warning. It will only be master Splinter and me soon. I would not be surprised if he wanted to leave too, however, considering how he had seemed lately.

I should learn to go on without Master Splinter either way. He tried to teach me that, and I still rely on him too heavily. So, if he does not bring it up to me, I will suggest it to him. As much as I do not like the idea, I know master Splinter could use this after his eighteen years with us.

--February 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

I finished my ninja training with master Splinter after all! This makes me feel better about things. Of course I don't feel much better. Things still seem kind of cruddy. At least I have something now I can say I finished. I'm proud of that.

I'm going to miss Leo and dad after I'm gone. I know I'll miss them bad... It's not working out for me here though. Here I am just depressed with what's happened. And let's face it, despite how much I love dad and Leo, they aren't my idea of good people for me to live alone with.

They're so...well...THEM that they just depress me more.

-Mikey

--February 2011 Michaelangelo

Dear Diary

Well this is it. It's the end of February and I managed to get on my way to California. I'm nervous because I have no idea of how schools work. So, I just hope I'm doing this right, or I'll be in deep crap.

Heh, imagine me, stranded in California...but it's too late to do much about it now. If I did screw up I can always find something else to do. I can find some way around things. It's not like I can't take the poor life if I have to.

I've always wanted to see California anyway...

-Mikey