Chapter 20 – Clearing The Air

The next Saturday morning, the quidditch teams were holding open practices so that all those who were interested in playing could learn a bit about the available positions in preparation for the actual tryouts. There were no Seeker openings on any of the teams, so it was decided to release a couple of snitches and let the seekers practice in and among the rest of the teams so that all the players would get used to the distraction of the snitch and those who sought to catch it. Harry made several awe-inspiring snitch pursuits, with fearsome dives and spectacular steering, but then remembered the notion of his father being such a show-off. From then on, he held back, watching the tryouts and scouting out the other teams and the Gryffindor hopefuls. It was a joy simply to be riding his broom in the sunshine. After practice, he and Cho retrieved the snitches that were out and set down near the locker rooms.

"Looking good out there, Harry," said Cho.

"Thanks. You too. Should be a good match this year. Do you want to talk over lunch?" asked Harry.

"No," Cho replied, "at your table, you'd be surrounded by your friends and same for me at mine. Besides, everybody'd want to pester 'Coach' about the DA."

"Well, I'm glad for the enthusiasm, but you're right. That's not the way to speak our hearts. I'll meet you at 12:30 near the Whomping Willow," said Harry, then adding with a laugh, "but not too near it."

"Do you mind if I bring someone to be kind of a chaperone?" asked Cho.

"What? Why? I mean I wouldn't … I'm not going to do anything – I really just want to talk about Cedric."

"I know. I know, Harry, and I do too. It's not that I don't trust you. I don't trust me to keep only to the topic. I haven't stopped caring about you, Harry, even if things got akilter," said Cho sadly.

"I'm sorry things went the way they did, too, Cho. But I hope you understand that right now, I'm not looking for any sort of relationship other then friendship," said Harry.

"Of course. Me, too. With the threats looming, our first priority is to prepare. But sometimes our hearts and our bodies overrule our brains. That's why I want Marietta along. Besides, she said she wanted a bit of a talk with you too," Cho said, "so we'll see you at 12:30."

Cho and Marietta were only a couple of minutes late. There was a sheltered cloister in the castle not far away that protected them both from the late summer sun and inquisitive eyes and ears. Harry and Cho talked for well over an hour, with Cho sharing everything she remembered about Cedric that wasn't too private and Harry described all the ways they had helped each other in the TriWizard tournament. Harry told about the effect that the dementors had had on him at the quidditch match three years earlier which allowed Cedric to beat him to the snitch and how Cedric had been so reluctant at the Quidditch World Cup to accept the praise his father heaped on him about getting the snitch. Harry described in very painful detail about Cedric's death and the nightmares he had been having since then. They cried together, Marietta joining in as she understood the pain they both felt. Harry and Cho hugged for several minutes silently, just letting the pain of their memories of Cedric be exorcised from their bodies in their tears. They thanked each other for opening up and for listening.

Then Cho said, "Marietta, I think we're done. Didn't you say you wanted to talk to Harry about something?"

"I did, Cho, but could I talk to Harry alone? I feel like I need to talk just to him," said Marietta haltingly.

"Sure you don't need a chaperone, too" said Cho with a wink. "No? I'll see you back at the dorm then, Marietta."

When Cho had left, Harry asked, "What's up?"

"Harry, when I received your first owl this summer, I was astonished that you'd let me back in. Last term, after the memory charm wore off, I spent nearly a month thinking about what I had done, and I was so ashamed," said Marietta.

"Everybody makes mistakes. I'm still not over several doozies I made last year. Do you know what happened at the end of the year?" asked Harry. After she shook her head, Harry found a way to tell her about the trip to the Department of Mysteries – the school knew they had been there anyway because of the reports in the Daily Prophet – without telling about the Prophecy, or Occlumency, or Kreacher, or the Order of the Phoenix. But he did say how it had led to Sirius's death and several significant injuries to others.

Marietta nodded. "Well, it's obvious you're leaving out some details you can't tell me for some reason. It's okay. A person'd have to be a fool not to expect strange things to happen around Harry Potter. But I get the idea: you have mistakes you have to get past, too. Perhaps you've been a bit too daring, where I was not courageous enough. I got to thinking more about my position with the wizarding world as if it was business as usual. I guess I didn't really believe you that You-Know-Who was back, so the DA seemed like an unnecessarily dangerous game."

"It was all too real to me," said Harry, "so perhaps I didn't understand quite how unreal my story must have seemed. Sometimes I think Cho was not too sure about my story, but just joined the DA because she wanted to spend time with me."

Marietta laughed. "No comment!"

"Well, I can't say I didn't like having the time with her," said Harry.

"Are you really okay with me being back in?" asked Marietta.

"I am, but some of the others have some hard feelings," replied Harry, to which Marietta nodded understandingly. "I've put in a strong word about accepting you and I've told them that none of them are to say anything to the rest of the school, but I can't say the bell has been unrung just yet."

"Fair enough. Trust has to be earned. They're being rational – you're the one who can't be explained."

Harry grinned. "Some sort of fool, no doubt. By the way, what did you tell everyone else about wearing the balaclava for the whole end of the year?"

"I said I had a bad potions accident when I was doing homework," laughed Marietta, with a reddening of her cheeks, which Harry found quite endearing.

"That works," he replied, laughing with her. "Well, if you're willing to resist Voldemort (she flinched at the name), I'm glad to have the help. You learned everything we did last year but the Patronus, so we need you as a team leader and a capable fighter."

"Thanks, Harry, that means the world to me. I just hope I can prove myself," said Marietta.

"I'm sure if the opportunity arises, you'll be as brave as anyone. If we're all squared away then, I have to get to the gym,"

"Harry, can I get my stuff and meet you there? I've been practicing spells and doing the morning run, but I don't really know how to do the stretching and other exercise that you told us about," Marietta asked.

"Of course," said Harry, "I'm glad to share anything I can to help people get stronger."

They went to their dorms for the things they needed and met again at the gym. Harry explained what he had learned about stretching, aerobic conditioning, and strength building. A number of other students listened in, as usually happened now when Harry explained things. Harry described the difference between the pain that says something is damaged and the soreness that says that the workout has been effective to strengthen the body. As he did his stretches, she was opposite him to imitate what he did, though less limberly. Several times, Harry found himself looking out of the corner of his eye to watch her in her leotard. He told himself he had no other interest than as a teacher, but he wasn't fully convinced. He fought against any sort of attraction. After the workout, they went for a cooldown walk around the castle, talking all the while, and then went back to their own dorms.

Hermione was sitting on a bench at a table doing some healer reading when Harry came in through the portrait hole.

"So, Harry, I noticed you had a nice afternoon," she said with a smirk. "What happened to 'I'm not going to get involved'?"

"I'm not involved," said Harry too abruptly. "I was just working out with her."

"You don't look at me that way when we're at the gym," she said, "Nor have you talked that much with Ron and me: frankly you've been quite distant when we've talked."

Harry sat down near her with his back to the table, put his elbows on his knees and propped his head up with his hands. He said to her quietly, so no one else would hear, "I have to keep my distance. Caring hurts too much already. I don't want to get involved. Except … I really do want someone special in my life."

Hermione put her arm around his shoulder from the front and pulled his other shoulder against her. "Of course, you do, Harry. It's your loving nature that's always carried you. It's the tension in the bow you keep pulling tighter and tighter. Just don't let it get pulled too tight – we can't have you breaking, can we?"

He laid his head on her shoulder. "It's nice that you're smart. But your comfort and understanding is brilliant. Please never stop being my friend."

"No, Harry," she said with a glisten in her eye, "I would never give you up."