Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back
Chapter Eight: Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay, Sort Of… Well, Not Really… (Pt1: The Chase!)
By: Sci-Fi Raptor
Disclaimer: See Chapter One
I'm a New Yorker, and a liberal by birth, but the is the FUNNIEST headline I have ever seen (and no, I'm not making fun of their political abilities…):
GAYS PUSH FOR ACTION
On with the show!!!
(-O-)
(Less than a week later)
Naru sat in the corner, her knees tucked to her body and her arms around her legs. She sat there quietly with her face buried between them, but sobs could be heard escaping her once in a while.
"If you want to still have children," Motoko said with an icy edge, "You will tell us where he went."
Everyone was at the lobby at Hinata-sou, interrogating the 'prisoners.' Haitani and Shirai were bound and gagged S&M style, with Motoko hovering threateningly above them. Naru remembered that these two were the last people Keitaro saw yesterday and anything he could have come up with was probably inspired by something they said. Haruka stood next to the doorway, a coiled whip in hand.
"Well, if Haruka was the one interrogating…" the shorter of the two said to himself. The other one heard him and said with anime-style agitation, "Leave me out of your sick fantasies!"
"If you don't tell us where he is, we'll have no choice but to hand you two over to her," Motoko said, with a voice of a professional killer. The person in question was Naru, and she was glaring at the two with angry, bloodshot eyes.
"Alright, alright," the taller piped. "We mentioned to him about this ship that's going to Pararakerusu," he said, stumbling on its name.
"Bananakerusu?" Su exclaimed, suddenly interested. She had magically sat on his head like a frog, her tongue hanging out like a dog's.
"No!" the shorter said. "PARARAKERUSU!"
"Where's that?" Kitsune asked. The two gave dumb stares, causing everyone to deadpan.
Motoko walked up to them, with a twitching eyebrow. She held her katana dangerously in the air and slashed down. In the last second, Haitani said to his friend, "You're the best friend I've ever had!" to which Shirai responded, "I whack off to your mom!" in what they thought would be their final exchange.
But the fatal blow never came. Indeed, their restraints merely slackened. Haitani opened his eyes to find that Motoko was walking away, her sword sheathed. I'm alive? he thought in wonder. He looked to his partner and saw that he too came to the same conclusion. "YOU WHACK OFF TO MY MOM!" he yelled at him, remembering his confession.
"I was kidding… I just wanted to go out with a bang, you know…" Shirai said, touching his index fingers together with an ashamed look.
Whack! Whack!
"AAIIIEEEE!!!" the pair screamed in unison, clutching their heads tightly. Haruka, whip unwound, looked down her nose at the two and said, "I think you two have about five more seconds before the girls get seriously pissed off at you…"
The pair looked around to see cold eyes and RHL out of there, thanking their unknown savior for letting them be perverted for yet another day. They made a resolution to hit on as many underage girls as they could.
"So now what?" Kitsune asked, her wry expression replaced with that of a more thoughtful one.
"I dunno…" Haruka said. "I could ask Seta if he knows of the place. Kami-sama knows he's been around," she added and walked to the telephone. She made a quick call and made contact.
"Hey Seta, you know of some island called Pararakerusu?" she asked. The girls got closer in hopes of hearing something good. "You do!" she exclaimed, getting the girls' hopes up. "Oh… that's too bad…" she looked at the girls and saw their pleading looks and explained very quickly that he was actually supposed to go on a dig there, but he missed his ship. She went back to the phone. "So, what are you doing about it? – Uh huh… What?! When? Yeah. Uh-huh… can you hold back for an hour or so? Great! Thanks," she said and hung up as he started professing his eternal love for her.
"WHAT HAPPENED!" the girls said in unison.
"He's flying a plane there himself, but he can only take one more. He said he'd wait an hour, so figure out who's going and move!"
Everyone looked to Naru, but she was already gone. They moved to look for her, but they heard the door closing. They all scrambled to the front and saw her already scaling the steps, suitcase in hand.
"Naru-sempai, what about your test results?" Shinobu asked worriedly.
"Someone just look at it for me. And when I get in, someone send my admission ticket," she shouted and faded away.
"She's really fired up for someone who claims she doesn't care about a certain dork…" Sarah said, getting an approving look from Kitsune.
(O)
(Two days later)
The whole party had gone to Todai to see the results. They scanned the numbers, and as expected, found Naru's posted.
"Yay!" Su and Sarah said and hugged. Nearby, a bunch of jocks were throwing Mutsumi up and down in the air; most likely because she found out she too got in. Everyone one made to leave in a while, but Shinobu lagged behind. More specifically, she was standing on one spot, as if rooted to the position.
"Shinobu-chan, we should get going," Motoko said. But Shinobu didn't reply; she just pointed up at the postings, looking like she'd seen a ghost. Everyone was curious as to why Motoko and Shinobu were standing like two idiots and followed their gaze. They all looked like a bunch of statues.
They saw Keitaro's name.
(Hinata-sou)
"What's the rush?" Haruka said as the Hinata-sou was being turned upside-down.
"Su, Sarah and Shinobu have fled on one of Su's demonic machines to tell Urashima and Naru-sempai that they have gotten into Todai," Motoko said in an annoyed tone.
"And we're going to keep them from getting into any trouble," Kitsune said with a sly grin.
"Or make some?" Haruka asked with an amused face.
"Maybe…" she replied as the rest of the gang filed out.
(O)
"KYAAA!!!" Naru screamed.
"HAHAHAAA!!!" Seta laughed. Their plane was somewhere in the sky, streaking a large pillar of smoke behind it as its engine died and finally exploded. The two had made an emergency evacuation and were now Para-dropping onto the island.
"Why are people trying to kill you!" she screamed at the knucklehead.
"I don't know," he said dumbfounded. "I thought I made a pretty convincing fake-death for them last time…"
"What the hell is wrong with you!!!" she screamed as they crashed into a forest.
"UMPH!" Naru groaned as her 'chute got caught in the trees' branches. She cut her line and fell a few feet. Fortunately, since her butt was so big and the ground pretty soft, the drop didn't hurt as much as it could have.
"I'm beginning to understand how Keitaro feels every time I punch him…" Naru said, rubbing her aching butt.
"I wonder where we are?" Seta mused to himself. Naru looked at him dumbstruck.
"You don't know where we are?" she asked quietly.
"Nope…" Seta said Seta-like.
Brushing all decency aside, Naru screamed, "KYAAA!!!" as she made to strangle him. Fortunately, Seta's brain didn't normally get a lot of blood, so he just stood there, wondering what was wrong with the teen and was largely unaffected.
(Nine hours later)
"Ahh, so there was a village here!" Seta exclaimed as the two broke through the tree line and entered a village.
"Are you telling me we were lost the whole time?" Naru asked, eye twitching.
"Hehe…" Naru fought the urge to violently strangle him again.
"Seta-san!" a deep voice boomed. "You've finally arrived! We were starting to worry you got shot down again!"
The voice belonged to a brute with a large shovel slung over his shoulder.
"Actually, Mario-san, I did…" Seta laughed. The larger Italian man laughed loudly and hugged Seta warmly, picking him up a few feet.
"You never change, do you?" he said, dropping him like a pile of bricks. He glanced over to Naru and said, "And who's this pretty lady? Is she that Haruka-san you're always talking about? She looks younger than I thought she would."
Naru blushed at the mix-up.
"No, this is Narusegawa Naru," Seta introduced. "I used to tutor her back when she went to high school." He looked over at Naru. "This is Mario-san. His team usually helps me out on my digs." Naru shook her small hand with the larger man's, who smiled at her.
"Um… hello…" she said shyly.
"Nyamo?" came a voice behind Mario.
"Nyamo?" Naru repeated. A small girl that was the splitting image of Shinobu came from behind Mario. "Shinobu?! What are you doing here?" Naru exclaimed. "And when did you get a tan?"
"Shinobu?" Seta asked, and then he saw the resemblance (Author pulls hair at his thickskulledness!!!). "Oh, this in Nyamo, she's a girl that's been helping us out on this dig so far," Seta said.
"Nyamo?" the younger girl repeated, though this time she was inspecting the stranger.
"So," the buffer man asked Seta, "Where'd you two land?"
"Somewhere in the southern forest," Seta said offhand.
"Yeah, we even had to cross a desert!" Naru interjected as Nyamo peeked under her skirt, to which Naru started chasing her.
"You mean the one that no one's crossed alive?" Mario asked skeptically.
"What?!" Naru exclaimed, halting her chase.
"Yup," Seta said, Seta-like. Naru almost gave into the urge to strangle him once again, but was run over by something heavy.
"Ooof!" she exclaimed and the thing got off. She was spraled over the ground, her eyes circling. Nyamo looked down at her from her perch from the giant turtle she was riding.
"What?" Mario said when he noticed Seta staring at him.
"Say it…" Seta prodded.
"Say what?" Mario asked, trying to act dumb.
"You know…"
"Dammit Seta, just cause I'm Italian and my name is Mario and I used to have a different job…" he fumed. Seta just stared at him, that expectant face still plastered on him.
"Oh all right," he said, finally giving in. With a (much) higher pitched voice, he said, "It's a me, Mario!"
Seta cracked up and Mario felt a little more dead inside.
(-O-)
Ahh!!! This story is out of control! It just gets longer and longer and my forecasts are as accurate as NASA!!!
(Sigh) Well… that's puts finishing this or The Other Me by the end of break out of the question. And yes… that means sporadic updates…
And remember, click the 'Go' button. (Flames are understandable, especially if critical)
Cheers! : )
