Disclaimer: Inuyasha is Copyright of Takahashi Rumiko

Nothing Without The Other

Chapter 13

She had never been so bored in her entire life.

There were countless memories of wandering aimlessly and leisurely about the country and she had always managed to find something to occupy her attention. And even when Sesshoumaru left her to attend to some dangerous matter, she never found herself as miserable as she was now.

Two days, two entire days had crept by so slowly that Rin found it difficult to separate them. Yesterday still felt like today, and why would it not? Sesshoumaru had remained quiet and ever since their last little spat. His behavior brought her back to the weeks after she had started following him - when he treated her like she barely existed. He acknowledged her need to eat or rest or sleep, but never with a word or a look. He would simply stop and sit to let her go about her business, but he did not seem to care that she was there.

Rin sighed heavily as she stared at Sesshoumaru's back. He was much more distant now. She had grown so accustomed to their conversations about this and that or finding some small way to tease him. She felt...lonely...it was the only way to correctly describe her feelings. It was as if she was making the journey alone.

Even when she stared at him, as she found herself doing quite often recently, he seemed too distant. His attention always seemed to be straight ahead of him during the day and directly up during the night, as if searching for an answer in nature. If he did not stop at night, she would swear he did not know she was there.

She missed him, she admitted with a sigh and felt silly for missing someone right in front of her. She even missed his stolen kisses. They were always so powerful and breathtaking, so wonderful. She blushed deeply, astonished by her own change of heart. Somehow it seemed more unnatural that he did not show her affection.

She sighed again. Sesshoumaru clearly wanted nothing more to do with her. It would not surprise her if he abandoned her once they arrived at Inuyasha's village. She certainly deserved it after the things she said.

Why were the fates so cruel?

Without warning Ah Un began to descend. She quickly grasped the reins before she lost her balance and refocused her attention on Sesshoumaru. He was already on the ground and making his way to sit beneath a tree, clearly telling her without speaking that they would remain there for the night.

Rin looked back at the sky and noted how much it had darkened. They were beginning to stop later and later these days, as if he was eager to cover as much ground as possible. Resolved not to let it bother her, she quickly leapt off Ah Un to go in search of food and wood.

Sesshoumaru watched her depart from the corner of his eyes. He was concerned, and a bit unnerved, by her strange behavior as of late. Her constant sighing was a clear sign that she was unhappy and either wanted something or required some attention. It also hinted that her strange mood could turn much worse if she was not provided with her desires.

He wanted no more trouble than she had already given him.

There were already too many complications in their relationship. He was seeking to resolve them by ending his silly advances. Though it seemed to repair things, he could not bring himself to speak to her and that only added to the tension and therefore making things worse. Still, he would rather deal with tension instead of rejection.

But the way she watched him made him wonder if she would still reject him now. Though he never gave her reason to believe he noticed her blatant staring, he was very much aware of it. She would do it often and at long periods of time, as if watching or waiting for him to say something or do something.

What could she possibly want from him?, he wondered. She probably wanted him to talk to her, to simply fall back into their daily routine when they were in the Western Lands. If she understood his feelings, she would not be so quick to pretend that their relationship had not changed once again.

Sesshoumaru scoffed. What exactly were his feelings and why should he have any? They were a complete waste of his energy, as was his effort to understand Rin. One minute she was kissing him, the next she told him to stop. Did she even understand her own feelings?

He spared her a glance and found she was staring at him yet again. She surprised him by blushing and quickly turning away to avert her eyes. But when he looked up at the stars, he felt her gaze return back to him once more.

Something was definitely wrong.

Rin only blushed when he was close to her or mentioned some intimate act that had occurred between them. She never blushed when he looked at her. True she avoided eye contact on more than one occasion, but she never just blushed because he caught her looking at him. Was she perhaps entertaining some idea about him...?

Foolish girl, Sesshoumaru thought. She had passed on the opportunity to explore that potential area of their relationship. He no longer wanted to run his fingers through those lush silky waves of black hair. He did not care if he ever heard her softly moan his name again. And those small, gentle lips...her tiny, warm hands...her firm, taunt legs...he had no particular interest in them anymore.

She could fantasize all she wanted, so long she kept it to that.

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Rin awoke the next morning to find herself alone. She sat up in a panic, fearing that Sesshoumaru had abandoned her sooner than she had first thought he would. But she soon realized that Ah Un was still resting behind her and managed to relax, knowing Sesshoumaru would not leave without his faithful dragon.

With a small sigh, she decided to take a quick bath in the river before eating. Anything to waste time before Sesshoumaru returned. But as the morning wore on, she began to wonder how long she would be forced to wait.

Boredom soon became too much and Rin found herself wandering from the makeshift campsite. She took Ah Un with her and located a large field not far away. There she stood for quite some time as she enjoyed the view and reflected on her changing feelings toward Sesshoumaru.

Rin realized how handsome he was and felt quite silly for never really recognizing it before. His eyes were quite striking. They were such a beautiful rich round gold and unusually calm. Something about them alluded to some mystery, as if he had the knowledge of the entire world locked behind them. Whenever he focused his attention on her, she felt as if they were pulling her, bidding her come closer.

She sighed pleasantly, a light smile across her face.

And then there were those wonderful markings on his body. The blue crescent moon that decked his forehead without standing out too much. Those pairs of magenta stripes just beneath his eyes only enhanced their alluring power. She had also seen markings at the ends of his wrist and could not help but wonder if they were located where the eye could not see.

She blushed brightly and reminded herself of his flowing silver hair. It was always well kept, though she knew not how he managed to do so. And it always amused her to see him tuck it behind his ear, as if he somehow knew the stray strands only added to his beauty and wanted to avoid any further admiration. Or perhaps he wanted to show off his pointed ears.

His rare smile was most cherished. It was sometimes gorgeous or frightening, but either way, it warmed her blood in a way she could not explain. She would give anything to see it again, to feel that way again.

Rin laughed at herself and placed a hand to her stomach, trying to ease the strange warmth she felt there. Sesshoumaru made her feel a number of things, some alarming and some all consuming, but in the end, she finally realized, it always felt so...so..she could not explain it. It was beyond words. Maybe..maybe if he kissed her again, maybe she could really begin to understand her feelings. She needed one more sweet moment with him and she would know if it was truly how she wanted to feel.

She sighed and tilted her head back to let the sun warm her face, wondering if Sesshoumaru would ever want her again.

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Sesshoumaru crossed his arms and tucked his hands into his sleeves. He pressed on calmly, though every inch of his body burned with anger. Determined not to give into it, he ignored Rin's rich, feminine laugh as it was carried through the wind along with the scent of that disgusting cheetah youkai.

But as he neared the top of the small hill, it was shock alone that kept him frozen in place when he would have other wise given in to rage.

Eiji chased after Rin and launched himself at her, tackling her to the ground. They both rolled before jumping to their feet once more and this time, Rin gave chase, laughing and giggling all the while. She managed to catch him in the same manner he had caught her and the momentum caused them to roll once more until Rin found herself trapped beneath his body. They stared at one another for a moment, both panting heavily with sloppy grins on their faces.

"Riiiiiiiiiin!"

Sesshoumaru snapped from his shock and looked down at Jaken as he raced forward, waving his staff widely in the air. He followed after him very slowly, not sure he could control his anger if he saw that wretched youkai face to face.

Rin looked up quickly to see Sesshoumaru watching them and then looked back at Eiji. Panicking, she shoved him away and hopped to her feet and straightened her kimono and hair. She glanced between Jaken and Sesshoumaru nervously, struggling to catch her breath so she could speak. This does not bode well, she thought.

"Riiin!" Jaken screeched once more and stopped to catch is breath once he reached them. "WHAT are you doing with this youkai?"

"Jaken-sama, relax, we were just playing a game," she said a little breathlessly and glanced over at Sesshoumaru once more.

"A game? A game! This fowl creature has no right to manhandle you in such a way! Not that you can expect manners from youkai from China!" Jaken gave him a dirty look.

Eiji instinctively reached over his shoulder and rested his hand on his pike. "What is this thing Rin?"

"I am Sesshoumaru-sama's loyal servant, unlike you!" He pointed an accusing finger at Rin. "How could you engage in such activity with Sesshoumaru-sama's mortal enemy? Cats of any breed cannot be trusted! I'm sure he's plotting to attempt to overthrow Sesshoumaru-sama again!"

Rin stared at him in confusion. "What are you talking about Jaken-sama? Eiji and I are friends, he would never-"

"You can't trust cats!" He repeated. "They all have something against Sesshoumaru-sama and his family. Even you were with us when they attempted to destroy him!"

Rin looked up at Sesshoumaru as he made his final approach with evident confusion still on her face. "Jaken-sama, neither you nor Sesshoumaru-sama told me anything about the battles you engaged in and you certainly did not allow me anywhere near them. I was always left behind, remember? I have absolutely no knowledge of any past grievances he may have with cat youkai."

Jaken scowled and crossed his arms. "Well he should leave you behind again! Allowing some strange youkai to handle you in such a way after Sesshoumaru-sama pushed his plans back an entire month just to accompany you to visit that wretched hanyou and-"

He was silenced with a small rock. He fell to the ground in pain and cursed Sesshoumaru's aim and power. How the hell did he manage to find a rock in this lush green field?, he wondered.

Sesshoumaru stopped behind Jaken, leaving a good distance between himself and Rin. Her scent was mingled with that of the cheetah youkai and he knew it was not just because it was standing next to her. He resisted the urge to cover his nose and thought about what he just witnessed.

He was sure that had they not arrived, that youkai would have taken full advantage of the situation he managed to get himself in. Rin called it a game, but Sesshoumaru was no fool. It was a very sly way of getting close and waiting for the opportune moment to steal a kiss or a touch. He probably would have ravished Rin half to death and she probably would have let him.

Sesshoumaru felt a strange, unnerving feeling rush through his stomach.

"Sesshoumaru-sama. Eiji and I were just playing a game, that's all," Rin offered quietly.

"You don't owe him an explanation," Eiji looked over at her. "Don't let these bullies make you feel badly for having a good time. He's the one who left you here all alone."

"Eiji, don't-"

"He is right Rin," Sesshoumaru cut her off. "You do not owe me an explanation. You are free to do what you want." She didn't respond. "Maybe you would prefer it if he were to escort you to visit Inuyasha."

Her faced burned and she felt as though she had been slapped. "If you don't want me around, Sesshoumaru-sama, please just say so."

"I simply offered a suggestion. You seem to enjoy his company much more."

"I don't want to go anywhere with him!" She shouted. "We were just visiting, just playing!"

Eiji glanced between Sesshoumaru and Rin, noting that the situation was spinning rapidly out of control. "I'm going Rin. I'll see you again, if your master says it is alright for you to have fun, that is." He cast Sesshoumaru a dirty look before bounding off.

Rin stared at Sesshoumaru as he watched Eiji disappear. When their eyes met, she saw something akin to disgust in his eyes. Before she could completely understand it, he turned and walked away. Jaken followed after him, giving her a small look of disdain and left her alone with Kimiko, whom Rin had only just noticed was there.

Rin placed her hand over her heart and stood there quietly for some moments, trying to ease the pain.

"Rin-dono."

"Hai, Kimiko."

"I thought you would enjoy a fresh meal and a hot bath so I've brought a few things with me. Lord Sesshoumaru has given us permission to go to a hot spring near by and meet him later."

"Arigatou, Kimiko. That would be wonderful."

Rin sighed heavily and followed after the toki youkai. She had her answer. Sesshoumaru would never want her again.

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Bbi: Rin is so silly, hehe, but I think her lack of understanding is really important. We know only by example what love is and Rin hasn't quite gotten the picture yet, but she's going to come around fairly quickly in the next chapter. Sesshoumaru is not so stable either, he can't make up his mind about how he should feel for Rin. It's not like him, but being in love is new to him so it's expected! Regardless though, my Sesshoumaru will always have a level head. He would never let inward confusion become outward confusion.

jschu25: Cliffhanger? What do you mean cliffhanger? I have no clue what that is...

sesshomaruhasafluffytail: Sorry for any confusion, I'll keep that in mind for future chapters.

LonelyInDarkness: I'm gonna go write another chapter...okay? runs away fearfully

Shampoo-chan: Arg! I don't know what it is w/these chapters being short. Most of them aren't relatively long, but some just come out too short in comparison to the others. But alas, I'm trying! And yes...next chapter Sesshoumaru and Rin will be.. But really, you should know me by now. Getting a lime out of me won't be THAT easy..mwhahaha!

Speaking of limes...I'm REALLY worried about adding one because of the way has changed the ratings. The highest rating is M, what the hell is that? Either I keep it to M or I risk getting the story booted off. So far my other stories are still up and kicking, but it could only be a matter of time! But, we'll see. I'm a risk taker. Anyway, thanks everyone for all your comments. I am really enjoying them because they are so very helpful and encouraging. I'm trying to keep up the good work and I hope everyone is satisfied with this chapter! Thanks a lot!

Rabid Anime Gurl