Chapter Four
There has always been something irresistible about Meg that drew me to her. At first I believed it was her physical appearance. But as time past, I realized that it was her defiant spirit, her unwillingness to submit to me, her strength in her own convictions and her ability to stand up for them in any circumstance. She knew how to rub me the wrong way, and she would do it any opportunity she got. I knew she was afraid of me, but she did such a good job of hiding it that I found much pleasure in trying to bring it out of her. The complexities of her emotions always gave me a refreshing new challenge, and I wanted to unlock them.
When Meg was delivered to my home outside of Berlin, however, I realized that her character had gone through a marked change. I had found it odd that she had hardly protested when she had been taken from Auschwitz, but thought nothing of it at that time. In my home, however, her old spark did not return.
I brought her into my study as soon as she arrived.
"Well, well, well. Nada Knezovich," I smirked.
She stared at the picture of the Fuhrer above my head.
"You will have to serve more years for those false papers."
She remained silent.
"Why are you here, Meg? To look for that pipsqueak Basil?"
There was no audible response at the mention of Basil's name.
I looked at her papers on my desk. "You offered a pregnant Jewish woman a ride in an automobile. You spent a week in Montelupich for that. You were released and then were caught trying to give food to Jews and Gypsies in Auschwitz. You spent six months in Montelupich, and another three weeks in Auschwitz." I stood up and began to walk around her. "What makes me curious is why? What do you care for the Jews?"
She finally looked at me. I saw something in her eyes that for a brief second seemed like fear. She quickly looked back to the picture on the wall.
"Answer me, Meg."
She was trembling. "I... I... I don't know."
I stood in front of her and looked down at her face.
Something made me ask, "Don't you care if you live or die?"
"I have already died," she said dejectedly.
This pitiable mess in front of me could not be the Meg I knew and, dare I say it, loved. The Meg I knew had spirit and courage and complete hatred for me. This Meg, however, had given up. She had accepted her situation.
"Who broke you?"
Her eyes grew wide with terror. "What are you going to do to me?"
"Who broke you?"
She did not answer. I was getting impatient. I wanted to shake the answer out of her. I gripped her arms, but then restrained myself.
"Get out of my sight," I growled in a strained voice.
She looked up at me, too terrified to move.
"Get out! Now!" I shouted at her.
She broke away from me and scurried out of the room.
I poured myself some cognac. I drank it, wondering how the SS had got to her. I was greatly disappointed that they had got to her before I did. There was no longer a challenge. She would probably submit to anything now.
I threw the empty glass against the wall.
Over the next few days I had little time to think about Meg. The Armaments Inspectorate had not received the proper paperwork for a shipment of new bombs, and the mess took days to straighten out.
One afternoon in my study, when I finally had time to think about her, I realized what must have gone wrong. I had heard stories of Montelupich, the prison in Krakow. There were rumors that they tortured prisons, beat them for hours on end. There was nothing anyone could do about it; it was the system. But this was all information I had received from other SS officials, mostly when they were drunk.
I made a mental note to send Fidget to Montelupich the next time he was in Krakow.
I shuffled through some papers on my desk on Basil. He was in Buchenwald and had made several, almost successful escape attempts. The next one would be his last. Dr. Dawson had been transferred to Auschwitz to assist the doctors there. I laughed to myself; he and Meg had just missed each other.
Meg came into the room with a bottle of wine. She filled up my glass, and then turned to leave. "Leave the bottle," I said. She turned back to me and set it down. "And turn on the radio." She did as she was told and left the room. A piece from Wagner started to play.
I sipped the wine, thinking about the Jews. I had personally had nothing against them. But the whole country was in a state of insanity about them. I had heard of the ghettos in Warsaw and Krakow. Perhaps that was the furthest the Jewish situation would go. I honestly did not care. I was not Jewish, so why should I?
I heard something coming from the next room. At first I ignored it, but when it persisted, I began to lean in closer to the wall from which it was coming from. It sounded like someone was humming to the tune on the radio.
There were five other servants in the house: one older man, two young men and two girls, all Jews. But the males were most likely outside and Danka was cooking in the kitchen. I had a pretty good idea who it was.
I left the room and looked through a crack in the door to the drawing room. Meg was humming to herself as she dusted the mantelpiece.
I moved around a little, hoping to be able to observe her more closely. The floorboards groaned under my weight.
Meg stopped humming immediately. She shot the door a nervous glance, and continued cleaning in silence. I waited a few more minutes, but Genia was coming down the stairs, so I continued walking along the hallway back to the study.
I had seen a rare moment of bliss in Meg. She had forgotten, for a brief period of time, those months in Montelupich. I wanted to see more of those moments.
As the day progressed, I tried to brush the idea away. By the time I went to bed that evening I knew I could no longer resist it. I had to see her in these private moments. I had to.
Montelupich was a prison in Krakow, Poland. In Schindler's List (the book, not the movie) they mention that there were rumors of torture attached to the place (they beat people for hours, executed prisoners in their own cells, etc.) Besides holding prisoners, it was also the headquarters for organizations such as the Gestapo, the Jewish Affairs Office, and the SS among other things.
