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A/N: I'd like to thank a few people before I get into the story. First, thank you to Dennisud  who is always there to send an encouraging review, even if it's early in the morning. Thank you! Next, I'd like to thank Hanyou-elf for encouraging me with this story when I started to doubt it. It helped me keep going. Thanks! My next thanks goes to JadesRose who basically told me to finish my paper. Actually, here's what she said: "Please write more soon! AFTER you finish your paper!!" JadesRose, you gave me the laugh that I needed and the initiative to get my sorry rear moving. I've still got some more to write, but it's coming! So thank you too! And as always, thank you to all of you who review. I really appreciate it that you would take the time to drop a small note. Enjoy!

Mates

By: Of Memories Past

Chapter 4: God Bless our Broken Home

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     "She wants to go home for a while."

     Miroku lazily opened one eye and looked up at the source of the voice that woke him from his nap. So much for trying to find a nice patch of grass and a shady tree to catch a few winks. But even the monk, no matter how abruptly awakened, could not help but feel slightly sorry at the sight before him. The proud hanyou he was accustomed to seeing—the one who could look danger in the eye and threaten it without a second glance—now stood before him with his head lowered and ears drooping. He could not even see the amber eyes that normally flashed with annoyance but softened when he did not think that people were looking. Miroku held back laughter. For the first time since he had known him, the poor pup was downright depressed.

     But, being the concerned and good friend that he was, Miroku decided that some answers were going to finally be elicited from his stubborn friend before he gave any advice. That is, if he played his cards right. He indifferently rolled his shoulders and closed his eye again. "So?"

     Inuyasha bristled and angrily dropped down to the ground in front of his normally supportive friend who, at the moment, was not helping. He looked indignantly at the supposedly sleeping face.

     Sensing that eyes were watching him, Miroku opened his own bluish orbs. "What?"

     "What do you mean 'what'?" Inuyasha snapped. He folded his arms cross his chest and slouched. "What am I suppose to do?!"

     "What do you care?"

     Rubbing the new bruise that suddenly appeared on the side of his face, Miroku supposed that the injury was worth it if it meant that Inuyasha would start talking.

     But Inuyasha was piqued.

     "I care!" he insisted stubbornly. "The wench is just too blind to see it!"

     Miroku smirked. Now this was getting somewhere. But he had to choose his words carefully—either that or go right for the kill.

     He chose the latter.

     "She loves you, you dolt," Miroku reproved less than gently. How hard was it to figure out what the problem really was? "She's upset that you and her are mated, and you don't feel the same for her. Women dream of being loved from the time they are girls, Inuyasha."

     "I love her," Inuyasha growled dangerously. "More than you know." He did not much care for the negative accusation that had been tossed at him. What he felt was his business. It was not up to some lecher to decide his feelings.

     Miroku blinked for a moment. He had not expected that confession to come so soon or so easily. No matter though. It made his job much easier. He sat up, still slightly stunned, and braced himself. What he was about to say could end up with him bruised, biffed, or missing an arm by the time the words left his mouth.

     "Kagome doesn't think so," he stated casually, keeping his indifferent demeanor. "She thinks that this is simply something that you feel you have to do. She's told Sango, Kaede, and me before that she felt that she 'was trapped in a permanent relationship with no love.' And those were her words, not mine."

     Inuyasha visibly slumped. "I do everything that a mate is suppose to do," he angrily muttered.

     "You have never once treasured your mate for who she is. A good roll in the hay isn't going to keep her happy, Inuyasha."

     The glare that the half-demon suddenly sent him caused chills to run up his spine. Okay, so maybe that had not been the most eloquent choice of wording…

     Known to him now that that matter was forbidden territory, Miroku cleared his throat and lightly tugged at the clothing that lay close to his neck. It had not been this hot beforehand.

     "What else to I need to do monk?!"

     Miroku was stunned for the second time that day by the sudden heated outburst. But it was good news at the same time. Inuyasha simply did not know how to love her. "You really are ignorant, my friend."

     Inuyasha raised a fist, silently threatening to let it fall over the monk's head. "How about we stop the insults and help me out!"

     A slow, mischievous grin spread across Miroku's face as he leaned closer to Inuyasha. "I could help you. But you have to swallow your pride and be willing to do whatever is necessary."

     "Feh." Inuyasha straightened his back and looked away. "How do you know what women want?"

     That impish grin spread even farther and even turned a bit smug. "Let us just say that being a lecher sometimes has its benefits."

     Inuyasha snorted. "How is that?"

     "Because I know what it is that Kagome would want. I can teach you to love her."

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     Inuyasha waited anxiously in the main room of their hut for Kagome to return from Kaede's. Earlier that morning, after he had come out to find her still sleeping outside their bedroom, she had angrily thrown on fresh clothes and left to the village, needing the consoling arms of the old miko.

      He had not seen her since.

     Now he waited, dying for her to get home so that he could see if some of the stuff that Miroku had said actually worked. Being impatient as he was, he wanted to try everything all at once. Anything to get things back to normal. Anything to set their bond where it should be.

     He had felt the strain on their relationship too. Inuyasha got up and added a little more kindling and coaxed the fire in the small pit back to life as he allowed his memories to take him back. Unwillingly, one certain memory hung above him like an ill omen, refusing to go away even as he tried to forget it. It kept pushing at his mind, twisting its intangible body until it finally infiltrated and readied to torture its owner.

     Inuyasha hung his head low when the memory of his and Kagome's first night together rose to the surface. He would never forget the look on her face when he carried her into their bedroom and gently sat her down on the bed. His eyes clenched shut at the painful recollection. She had been terrified. Her wide, fear-filled eyes had shone with a thin sheen of water as she began nervously unbuttoning that silly school uniform that always wore. The scent of fear radiating off of her had saturated the room, making him regret what had to be done. He would have waited if she had not been in such danger.

     She had cried all night.

     Things gradually got a bit more comfortable over the short month that they had been together. They became use to one another's ways and settled into their own routine even though the initial strain of being forced together too quickly remained. At least they had their own habits to make things easier on them.

     But Kagome was right. There was no love—or at least love was not expressed as it should be. Yes, their lives as mates were the same as any other in the physical sense, but the little bits of affection that went into making a relationship stronger and unique were nonexistent. They needed that. Miroku had said that Kagome needed affection—needed "the little things in life." Well, if that's what it took, then so be it.

     Absently, Inuyasha began chewing his lower lip. He wanted it too. He knew that he had the freedom to love on her and make her feel loved. He knew that she would have clung to that immediately. But, though he would not admit it to anyone, he was shy. The brave hanyou who could conquer anything could not defeat his own insecurities and create the life that he and his mate both wanted. Instead, embarrassed at his emotions, Inuyasha had buried them deep down and simply done his "job." Well, that time was over. Kagome had been put through hell and back over the last month, and he was going to fix it no matter what it took.

     His amber eyes lit up for a moment when her scent became evident outside of the door, and he eagerly leapt up to meet her. He was glad to see her and was going to prove it.

     Confusion etched itself on Kagome's face when the door covering suddenly moved aside for her. It could not be Inuyasha. Her expression darkened, and she walked through the entrance. No, Inuyasha would be sitting by the fire and probably complaining that dinner was not finished. Or even started for that matter. Either that or he was sound asleep on their bed. There was a better chance that ghosts were letting her in.

     But to her surprise, it was Inuyasha who had pulled the thick door covering back for her to enter. She had no sooner stepped through the door than she came face to face with the hanyou she called her mate. Her eyes locked with his for a moment, her dark orbs searching his golden ones as he uncertainly looked back at her. After a moment Kagome's patience started to waver. What did he want?

    "Inuyasha, what?" she asked abrasively. She frowned when he seemed to flinch at her words, and she noticed how his ears seem to wilt a bit. What was wrong with him? "Inuyasha, what…"

     "Welcome home, Kagome." He gently brushed his lips across hers before pulling her into his embrace and holding her close. "I'm glad you're back." Inuyasha took a deep breath, and a small smiled touched his lips. This felt right.

     But unfortunately Kagome was not yet convinced. She savored the feeling of the tender, surprisingly loving, hug for a moment before pulling back and fixing him with a look.

     "What's wrong, Inuyasha?" Her hands stubbornly graced her hips as she stood firm. She was not going anywhere until she got some answers.

     Inuyasha took a deep breath and forced himself to remain calm. He was more than a little frustrated that he was trying, and she just was not responding. 

     "I'm sorry, Kagome. I'm sorry for everything I've done wrong. I'm sorry for not seeming to care about you, I'm sorry for not seeming to—" he paused for a moment and swallowed "—for not seeming to love you." Reaching out, he took her small hands into his larger ones. "I want things to be the way they should be."

     "And how's that Inuyasha? Because so far, you've made it clear to me that me sitting back and waiting around is how things should be. With you in charge of course. Am I supposed to believe that suddenly things are going to turn around and be all better? Believe suddenly that you love me?" Her eyes glowed with suppress anger as she glared at him.

     Ouch. That one hurt. Sighing, Inuyasha released her hands. Miroku said that she might still be angry. After all, she had been hurt pretty badly. But he remained calm, knowing that nothing would ever be accomplished if he lost his temper.

     "Kagome I do love you." He paused for a moment to allow the words to sink in, both for her and himself. He was not use to openly expressing something like that. "But you were right last night. I've done a crummy job of showing it." The ground suddenly became interesting as he tried to collect the many thoughts racing through his mind. He wanted so badly to make her understand that he also wanted things to change. Miroku had said that it would be either hard or easy. Looked like the more difficult side of things had blessed him yet again.

     "I want things to be better." Inuyasha paused and grasped her hands again. "Please let me try, Kagome. Let me try."

     Kagome pushed back her tears and nodded her head. He seemed sincere. "I want things to be better too, Inuyasha. But you had better not break my heart again." She eyed him for a moment before moving forward to wrap her arms around him, needing to know that he was indeed telling the truth. She nearly cried right then when his arms immediately snaked around her and pulled her closer to him. He did want to make the effort.

     "I was telling you the truth, Kagome," he whispered in her ear, not trusting his own voice at the moment. He could smell the salt beginning to collect in her eyes and was having a hard time keeping his own tears back.

     This was proving to be more emotional than he had anticipated.

      Kagome pulled back slightly, still remaining in the warmth of his arms as she looked at him with the suppress tears finally rolling down her cheeks. "I love you."

     The way her voice cracked when she said those words was his breaking point. He could hear the hurt and the hope mixed in her tone as she looked up at him and told him yet again that, even though he had been a jerk, she loved him. Inuyasha closed his eyes, his own tears falling as he held her to him again. "I love you too. More than I've shown."

     Kagome's tear bright eyes widened when she saw his tears, and she pulled back from his embrace again, cupping his face in her hands. "You're crying!"

     Inuyasha never cried. She began brushing his tears away with her thumbs and even leaned forward to kiss some away. But they continued their silent course down his cheeks, never seeming to stop.

     She cried harder.

     "I cry too," Inuyasha whispered, mentally cringing that he was thought to be so emotionless. "I just don't usually do it in front of others."

     Both of their tears increased, and they sank down to the floor together, holding each other more tightly. So much had gone wrong, and repairing the damage done seemed nothing less than a looming task that lay ahead.

     They cried in each other's arms all night.

A/N: Man, now I'm depressed. I promise that things will get happier. Now this has nothing to do with Inuyasha, but I'm going to share it anyway because it makes me happy. I'm leaving college tomorrow for break! Oh yeah! Heading to my aunt's for a few days, going to visit some family, and then I'm flying home on Saturday! I am soooo happy. Thank You, God!

Again, I hope you all enjoyed the chapter. I'll update as soon as I can. And thanks to all of you who gave me information on Inuyasha's age! God Bless! ~Of Memories Past.