Chapter Five:
Voice of Thunder, Hangover of Hell
"Ow... my head... I can't even think..."
"It's your own fault, Nakago," I reminded him, not a speck of pity in my voice.
"Don't talk so loud." Snoop Dogu held his head in the corner, next to his twin brother who was doing the same thing. It confused me for a bit, almost like there was a mirror between them.
Tomo, who lay passed out in Soi's arms, finally woke up. He yawned and rubbed at his head, staring upwards sleepily. He looked up at the weather-witch, blinked a few more times, then screamed.
"Ow!" both Tomo and Soi yelled, jerking away from each other and grabbing at their heads.
"Why did you have to scream so loud?"
"Why did I have to scream so loud?"
I facevaulted. "Oey... Ashitare, do you like to play catch?"
"RAAAAAAAH!" Ashitare smiled and wagged his butt.
"I'll, um... take that as a yes." I walked outside with Ashitare following me on all fours. Once I found a fairly large grassy area behind the palace next to a pond, I picked up a twig and threw it. Ashitare whipped across the field, grabbing the stick and bringing it back to me in almost record time. I was surprised at his speed - I hadn't expected a big wolf-man to be so agile. Every time he brought it back, I would pat his head as a reward. I think he was enjoying the game a lot more than I was, but it made me pretty happy, too. At least this way I didn't have to deal with all my hung over seishi.
I sweatdropped at the thought and opened my mouth to complain to Ashitare about it when suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a tuft of orange hair from behind a bush. "Hey... Is that...?" I ambushed the bush (teehee, no pun intended) and jumped on the tuft. "GENROU! I SEE YOU!"
"MEOOOOOOOOW!"
"Since when did you make that... ow!" Genrou - or rather, a fluffy orange cat - scratched my face. I let go of him and he ran off, yowling the entire way. I frowned, surprised to find that it wasn't because the cat had scratched my face, but because I wished it really had been Genrou.
"I miss Dee and the others, and I really miss Genrou..." I shook my head after a second. "I miss him? HA! That woman-hating, foul-mouthed, funny, sweet in a weird way..." I shook my head again. "What the hell was that about? Maybe my seishi are starting to make me lose my mind." I felt Ashitare lick my cheek where the cat had scratched me. "Oh… uh, thanks Ashitare."
I was glad he only licked me a couple times. It would have just gotten weird if he'd kept doing it.
xxx
"Here's the hospital," Hotohori told the other seishi. He was standing in front of a building with some Chinese characters that Dee couldn't read, but it obviously must have said hospital.
"Yay! We've found another seishi!" Dee flashed a victory sign.
"We haven't found them quite yet no da."
"Then let's get to it!" Genrou pushed open the doors and led them all inside.
Chichiri smiled teasingly but still oh-so-cutely at the bandit. "Who made you the leader no da?"
"The author because she looooooves him!" Dee sang.
SHUT UP!
"She wants to kiiiiiiiss him, she wants to juuuuuump him—" a flower pot flew out of nowhere and hit her over the head. "Ow!" She looked up towards the ceiling while rubbing her head, as if the rubbing would make it feel better. "What was that for?"
FOR ACTING LIKE AN IDIOT, DAMMIT!
"Um, okay..." Tamahome sweatdropped, then glanced forward at a woman rushing through the entrance of the hospital. "Oh! Excuse me, ma'am..." The woman paused and looked back at us over her shoulder. "Sorry to bother you, but we're looking for a healer with a red character on him. Do you know of any?"
"A healer with a red mark... I don't think so, but I haven't been here for very long. If you don't mind waiting, the doctor should be back by tonight, and he may be able to tell you."
"Thank you."
"Sure thing, just follow me to the waiting room." She led them down the hallway, showed them the room, and hurried out again.
"I think Tamahome should be the leader from now on. He has a lot more delicacy than you, Tasuki," said Nuriko, raising her eyebrow at Genrou, who only folded his arms across his chest in response.
"The Priestess of Suzaku is the leader." Tamahome smiled and set his hand on Dee's shoulder. "I just wanted to talk to that lady before Tasuki made a bad impression."
Tasuki glared at him. "What is this, Pick on Tasuki Day or somethin'?"
Chichiri stepped in before they could get into a fight. "We should rest while we can no da." He grabbed a pillow from thin air and curled up oh-so-cutely in the corner. Dee followed suit, sitting down on a long chair against the wall. It was much like a couch, but with no back. I guess that's called a bed. Okay, so she sat down on the bed. Hotohori sat down next to her, smiling his most charming smile. She was too busy feeling flustered to notice the glare that Nuriko threw at her.
xxx
"I wish I could read this damn scroll!" I screamed, throwing the stupid thing across the room. "There's got to be another clue somewhere on here! And the only one who's not hung over is you, Ashitare, but I can't understand what you're saying!" The wolf-man frowned and lowered his head. "Oh... I'm sorry. It's not your fault. I'm just a bit frustrated." I scratched him under his right ear. "I'm really glad you're here Ashitare. Not only are you the only Seiryuu seishi keeping me company right now, but I think I'd also miss my dogs from back home a lot more if you weren't here."
xxx
Dee woke up, surprised to find that she'd actually fallen asleep on the somewhat uncomfortable couch... bed... thing. She was also surprised to find herself in Hotohori's arms. She couldn't help but smile as she looked up at his face. He looked so peaceful asleep. A snore interrupted the moment. Dee looked to her left to see Genrou lying on the floor, a pillow under his head, with his legs and arms splayed across the floor, snoring uproariously.
She then noticed that another person sat on the couch-bed-thing. It was Tamahome, sleeping silently against the wall and facing the opposite the direction. Nuriko was sleeping in a nearby corner. She looked over at Chichiri, who was sleeping oh-so-cutely in about the same position he had been in when he first lay down. She looked back at Hotohori, frowning a bit despite her comfortable position.
'I still haven't answered him, and I don't know how. He's been so nice to me, but how can I accept his offer? Do I really want to stay here as his wife... and Empress? I'll miss so many people at home. But if I go back, will I miss Hotohori? I haven't known him long enough to know if I'm in love with him or not, but I don't think I am right now. But he's really nice, and what if I gave it some time? Would I eventually fall for him? Will I regret going back? But what about my family and my friends? What about video games and hair dryers? What about my period? I don't even know how they take care of that stuff here!'
She touched her head, moaning slightly. 'Ow, my brain hurts...Stop thinking. I don't need to worry now. He didn't give me a time limit.'
Someone knocked on the waiting room door, and the others woke up. Dee jumped out of Hotohori's arms, blushing as she noticed the looks all the other seishi shot her, and answered the door. She looked up... and up... and up... into the gentle face of a young man. "Um...?" she oh-so-eloquently managed to say.
A super deep voice greeted her. "Hello. I'm the head doctor here. Is there something you wanted to ask me?" The floor shook as he spoke.
"Yes. Are there any healers here with a red mark on their bodies?"
He blinked, but recovered quickly from his surprise. "Uh... that would be me, actually."
"Can we have some proof-a that?" asked Genrou.
"Sure."
WHAM! The tall man punched Genrou in the face, knocking out one of his teeth. Then he held out his hand and a red light glowed from a symbol that appeared on his palm. Green bubbles drifted out of his palm and towards Genrou, sending the tooth back to the owner's mouth and healing him instantly.
"Did you really have to do that?" Genrou demanded, holding his no-longer-hurting jaw.
The man shrugged. "I had to get the symbol to appear somehow." He turned to look at the others. "I'm the seishi known as Mitsukake. You must be the Priestess of Suzaku." The priestess and the other seishi put out their arms, trying to keep their balance as the ground shook.
Dee stared at him for another moment, trying to figure out how a voice could get that low, then remembered her manners and spoke up. "Oh, yes, I am."
"It's a pleasure to finally meet you." He bowed, and Dee bowed back after the ground had settled. "Why don't you come to the kitchen to have dinner? We can leave in the morning."
"Wow, he certainly is flexible with his schedule," Nuriko remarked.
xxx
"This place stinks!"
"It seems that the twins were too young to hold down their liquor," explained Nakago as he pointed to two buckets in the corner. "And don't talk so loud, will you? I still haven't completely recovered from the other day."
I cupped a hand over my mouth and grimaced at the smell wafting around the central meeting room. "Ah... who's gonna empty those? Tomo, would you please?"
Tomo nodded, but didn't move.
"Um... Tomo, when are you going to empty them?"
"I just did."
I looked over at where the buckets were supposed to be sitting. Instead, I saw two pots of fresh flowers. "TOMO! YOU JUST COVERED THEM UP WITH YOUR ILLUSION CRAP!"
"If you can't smell them, then what's the difference?"
I sweatdropped.
xxx
"Yay! Now I can see Haley-chan!" Dee hopped onto her new horse and bounced around in the saddle.
"Thank you again for letting us borrow these horses, Mitsukake," said Hotohori as he climbed on behind Dee.
"It's no big deal, we just need to be sure to return them. The hospital may need them later, after all. I'm sorry we could only lend five. I suppose we'll have to go in pairs." A nearby tree shook as he spoke, scaring a flock of birds out of the branches.
"Ooh... I'll ride with you, Tamahome!" Nuriko mounted Tamahome's horse (heh, that sounds dirty) and grabbed him around the waist, snuggling her face into his shirt.
Tamahome sweatdropped. "Uh... okay..."
"Good-bye, Mitsukake!" A long-haired blonde woman ran to the freakishly tall, freakishly well-muscled, freakishly deep-voiced man and gave him a peck on the lips.
"Good-bye, Shouka." He smiled at her, and gave her one last hug before he mounted his horse and they all rode off.
Chichiri smiled oh-so-cutely, turning chibi and flashing an oh-so-cute victory sign. "Only one more seishi left no da!"
xxx
"Okay guys, are you all over your hangovers?" I asked at breakfast.
"I'm as fresh as those daisies!" exclaimed Snoop Dogu as he pointed to the two flower pots in the corner. Tomo snickered.
"Um...right, anyway...Nakago, would you please read the scroll so we can all think over it again?" I handed the scroll to the General.
He sat there, silently looking at the parchment. After a moment, he looked up again. "Okay, I read it."
"I meant out loud."
"Oh yeah...right..."
"Hold on...I'll be back." I walked out the door.
"Harii, wait. Where are you going?" asked Amiboshi.
"Bedpost," I mumbled.
"No! You can't!" Amiboshi ran to me and grabbed my hand.
I sat back down with a frustrated sigh. "Fine... let's just try to figure out all of this."
"Thank you," Amiboshi said, smiling happily.
xxx
"We'll need six rooms."
"Six? There's seven of us, Hotohori-sama," Mitsukake said.
"Dee and I will be sharing a room."
My best friend's eyes almost popped out of her head. "We will?"
"Yes."
"If Tamahome and I share a room, it'll save money!" Nuriko grabbed onto Tamahome's arm.
"I do like saving money…" he admitted.
Genrou shrugged. "Well then, the three of us might as well be roomies." He swung his arms around Mitsukake and Chichiri, which wound up looking pretty awkward seeing as how Chichiri was shorter than him by several centimeters and Mitsukake was taller than him by several hundred centimeters.
"Right then... three, and we have five horses in front that need to be sent to the stables."
"Yes, sir." The man bowed as Hotohori paid him. Dee still marveled at the fact that no one seemed to recognize him as Emperor without his fancy robes and box-hat thing. "Follow me." The man led them to three adjacent rooms. "I'll go tend to your horses."
"Thank you," Hotohori said, politely returning the bow as the man walked off. Once he'd disappeared around the corridor, the Emperor turned to his companions. "I think we should talk in our room first." He opened the first room and the seven of them entered, Genrou closing the door behind them.
Chichiri nodded towards Dee. "If you'd like, I can recite a spell where we can see and talk to Harii-chan no da. It's a safe way for you to speak with her and tell her what happened."
"Go ahead, then! What are you waiting for?" Nuriko asked.
"I know what's going on because people filled me in during the ride here," Mitsukake said. A bowl on a table in the corner fell off and broke from the miniature earthquake his voice caused.
"Um... we knew that Mitsukake," Dee said, cocking an eyebrow at him curiously. "We were there."
"I was telling the audience." A flower vase tipped over and shattered.
Dee sweatdropped. "Ah. My mistake."
"I guess I'll do the spell now no da." Chichiri stood at the side of a wall, put his fingers to his mouth, and furrowed his eyebrows in that oh-so-cute way.
"Wait!" Chichiri stopped furrowing his eyebrows in that oh-so-cute way at Dee's outburst. "I'd like to talk to my friend alone if that's okay." Hotohori nodded and led the seishi - except for Chichiri - out of the room.
"I'll have to stay here no da."
"Oh, that's okay. I trust you." The monk smiled, then went back to furrowing his eyebrows in that oh-so-cute way. The wall turned into the picture of a room.
"Where is she?" asked Dee. A big furry wolf-man walked in and sniffed at the wall which wasn't a wall anymore.
"RAH! RAH! RAH! RAH!" He ran off.
"What the hell was that?" Dee asked with a sweatdrop.
xxx
"Ashitare... Ashitare... what is it boy?" He had found me by the pond, reading a translation of the scroll that Amiboshi had helped me create.
"RAH RAH!"
"Timmy's trapped in the well again?"
"RAAAAAH!" He shook his wolfish head and jerked a paw in the direction of my room.
"Oh, you want me to follow you!" I patted his head and followed the "RAH RAH RAH"-ing wolf down the long palace corridors and finally into my room. "Ashitare, calm down! What is it?" He pointed his nose at the wall which wasn't a wall anymore. "Wha... DEE-CHAN!" I sprinted towards her.
"Haley! That's not—!"
SMACK! "Ouchie-doodles."
"It's just a spell Chichiri cast," Dee explained, though a little late. "Listen, I've got some bad news."
I looked up at Dee as I rubbed my head, thinking the rubbing would make it feel better. "Um... what is it?"
"Well... er... y'see... I kind of..." She poked her index fingers together innocently. "I sorta-kinda-maybe-on-accident... killed one of your seishi."
I turned chibi and nearly ran into the wall that wasn't a wall again. "YOU WHAT?"
"I didn't mean to! You know how you always joked around and said I had acid spit? Well... I really do." I fell over. "Heh... my bad!"
"Aaaaaah..." I ran to my bedpost. BANG! BANG! BANG!
"Haley-chan... I really am sorry. But listen, if you're still here, that must mean there's another way to summon Seiryuu."
I looked at her. "Heeeeey, you're right! So I haven't failed! HAHA! TAKE THAT CANADIANS!"
"Chichiri was going to come to the palace and bring you to this inn, but now that we've already talked, I guess we don't have to..."
"NOOO! PLEASE TAKE ME!" I ran to the wall and put my hands against it. "PLEEEEEASE!"
Dee's eyes widened. "They're not hurting you, are they?"
"Well, no... they've been pretty nice to me, actually, it's just... They're useless, Dee! ALL OF THEM! I mean, some of them aren't as bad as others. I like Ashitare." I patted my friend on the head and he smiled. "And the twins are all right. But the others..." I drifted off, wincing at the thought of the drunken party the other night, and the hangover the other morning, and everything in between. "Anyway, I'd like to stay with you. Pleeeease? I'll tell them before I leave. I'm sure they won't mind if I go for a little while."
"Chichiri, is that okay?"
I heard the monk's voice from the left of the wall that wasn't a wall. "Yes, but hurry up and decide on a meeting place no da! I can't hold this spell much longer!"
"How about right here in my room?" I suggested. "In just a few minutes."
"All right, see ya soon no da!" The wall faded.
Ashitare whimpered, nudging my leg unhappily. I glanced down at him and flashed him a tiny smile. "Don't worry, I'll come back soon. But for now I have to go find Nakago." I walked to Nakago's chamber and knocked on the door. "Heeelllooooooo! Are you there Nakago?"
"Come in!"
I opened the door, and was a little startled to find him shirtless in his bed. I was really hoping he wasn't naked under the sheets. "Um... Nakago, I'm going to be leaving for a little while."
"But we need you to... er, we need your help to figure out how to find the last seishi."
"Oh... heh... about that... I've got some bad news." I poked my fingers together.
"Bad news?"
"Yeah...you see..."
THUMP!
"What was that?" Nakago stood up, and to my extreme relief and also extreme displeasure I found that he was wearing pants... of the leather thong variety, that is.
"Nothing, it was just... I gotta go!" I ran to my room and found Chichiri and Genrou pulling themselves out of the broken bits of my bed.
"Damn! You think you could have landed us any harder?" Genrou complained.
Chichiri rubbed the back of his head, expecting the rubbing to make it feel better. "At least there was a bed no da!"
"Not anymore, there ain't!"
"Chichiri! Genrou!" I ran to Genrou and hugged him around the neck.
"Wha... Harii-chan..." Genrou stood there for a second, a bit startled. I was a bit startled myself to find that I had instinctively hugged him like that. "Would ya get off of me?" He finally pushed me off.
"Sorry. I just missed you guys."
Chichiri smiled oh-so-cutely at me and I hugged him too. "It's good to see you too no da."
"You! I remember you!" A familiar voice from the door growled. We all whipped around to find the Seiryuu seishi gathered in the doorway, peering inside to see what all the noise had been about.
"Harii-sama! What's going on?" exclaimed Amiboshi, glaring at the newcomers suspiciously.
Genrou pushed me behind him. "The Priestess is going with us!"
"Tasuki, try to be a bit nicer no da!" Chichiri reprimanded, then turned to the Seiryuu seishi and bowed politely. "I'm sorry. The Priestess of Seiryuu and the Priestess of Suzaku are good friends no da. The two just wish to see each other for a while."
"I'm going with you," Amiboshi stepped forward, still glaring at Genrou and Chichiri. "I don't trust these guys."
Chichiri shrugged. "I guess you can, but we may be a little squished at the rooms no da. Jaa no da!"
Amiboshi grabbed my hand, and Chichiri grabbed Tasuki's and mine.
"Bye everyone! I'll be back in the morning!" I yelled.
"Wait! I'm not letting these Suzaku seishi leave..." Nakago eyes slit evilly. "ALIVE!"
He held out his hand, and it began to glow a dangerous dark blue. Chichiri furrowed his brows together in that oh-so-cute way, trying to transport us as quickly as possible. Genrou pulled out his tessen and I watched him moving his lips in the familiar spell. Nakago smirked. "Get ready to..." Ashitare lifted his leg and relieved himself on the general's leg. "AW, DAMN IT!"
"Thanks Ashitare!" I yelled as we slowly faded away.
Next Episode Preview...
FREAKY CAT THING: Haley-sama has escaped from the Kutou Palace, and will soon be joyfully reunited with her best friend Dee-sama, Priestess of Suzaku... but will their meeting turn into a meeting of anger?
DEE: (Kicks him out of the way) You melodramatic idiot, like that could ever happen! Haley-chan and I are ti-zight, f'sho!
HALEY: Word to your mama, G-Fry!
DEE: Homie don't play dat, foo'! You got beef?
FREAKY CAT THING: (Claw-swipes them both) Would you stop spouting '90s slang and get on with fulfilling the prophecy already?
DEE: Ouch! Grr... stupid cat thing, I'll show you a thing or three...
HALEY: Dee, shouldn't you announce the next chapter first?
DEE: Mwa? Oh, right, right... (Er-hem) Stick around to see the fur fly in, "Friends Don't Let Friends Turn Into Vengeful Crazy-Women!"
