Chapter 2 is fixed as well! Please review!
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"Hey! Wench! Another round of ales! Make it snappy!"

Even from where she was in the kitchen, Saryu could hear the rowdy spaceship captains and their crews spout off drunken orders. She rubbed a forearm across her brow and continued washing dirty mugs that flowed through the kitchen in a steady stream. Washing dishes was hard work for a kid. Still, she was glad she was in here, where it was relatively safe, instead of out there. The door opened, and a half-drunk Arayla wandered in, arms loaded with dirty mugs. She plopped them in the sink, sending a wave of sudsy water to flood the floor and Saryu's apron.

"Hey, watch it." She grumbled. Arayla smiled at her.

"Oh, sorry. Don't worry, you won't be in here much longer. The crowd's dying down." The older girl said. Saryu was awash in her gin-soaked breath. Arayla grabbed another armload of alcohol-filled mugs and headed out.

Saryu took a moment and snuck a peek through the swinging door to see what 'the crowd' looked like. The room was dimly-lit and filled with smoke, and Saryu could see none she recognized. She was a little glad that the two earlier customers weren't there. She didn't want them having fun without her. That Qui-Gon Jinn was kind of cute, and the other guy, Count Dooku, seemed nice enough. She saw Arayla heading her way, and she hurried back to her place at the sink.

At last, the crowd of drunken idiots began to die down. Saryu finished the dishes and went out to clean tables. Toku had passed out a while ago, and she'd dragged the hefty man to his room, where she'd left him in a fat pile on the floor. She took care to leave him facedown, with his head to the side before leaving him for the night. Arayla had passed out as well, but Saryu left her in the chair she'd blacked out in. Saryu washed the last of the tables before heading up the stairs. As she reached the third step, she heard Toku's drunken voice follow her. He was babbling something or other, and she decided she would have none of this. "I'm taking a shower!" She bellowed down the stairs after him. In a huff, she went into her room. Hers was on the same floor as the other rooms that customers stayed in, but she didn't bother to be quiet. In fact, she hoped she woke a few of them up. That would be Toku's punishment for acting like a fool. Let him deal with angry customers and have a hangover at the same time.

She undressed and threw her still-wet clothing down the stairs. She ran down the hallway wrapped in a towel and slammed the door of the bathroom in the hopes of waking a few more customers. She showered quickly and finished. Finally convinced she was clean, she headed back down the hall to her room, still wrapped in a towel. She flopped facedown on her bed with a sigh.

"Long day, huh?" There came a soft voice from behind her.

"You have no idea." She said into the pillow. She pulled her pillow tighter onto her face before turning to see who had spoken. She was quite suprised to see Qui-Gon standing in her doorway. "Hey there. I didn't see you down there." She teased, sitting up. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and motioned for him to come and sit next to her.

"Well, you know, it's not exactly allowed..." He stammered nervously, taking a seat next to her. She giggled, bumping her legs together.

"Who says you're not allowed to have fun?" Saryu asked in a playfully mocking tone. She didn't exactly mean to pry, but it was in her nature. Qui-Gon was silent for a long time.

"The Jedi order." He said quietly, as if speaking to himself. Saryu blinked.

"Jedi!" She declared, astonished. Qui-Gon looked alarmed, as if she wasn't supposed to hear him. Now it was her turn to blush. "Sorry." She said, a little embarassed at her big mouth. "You're a Jedi?" She asked, a little quieter. He nodded. "That is soo cool!" She squealed in as quiet a voice as she could muster. "Ever since I was a little girl, I've dreamed of becoming a Jedi knight, err, knight-ess. Whatever you call them. But... some things happened and I wasn't able to." Her voice dropped and she turned her head. Her gaze fell upon a framed photograph of a beautiful smiling woman and a handsome, dark-haired man. Between them, they held a beaming little girl, whom Qui-Gon suspected to be Saryu. He could sense her sadness.

"What happened to them?" He asked quietly. Now it was her turn to be silent. After a few minutes, Qui-Gon figured she wasn't going to tell him. He didn't know whether she wanted him to leave or not, so he got up and headed for the door.

"They died." There came a small voice behind him. He paused and glanced over his shoulder. Saryu was staring at the floor, unmoved, as though she had never spoken. He came and sat beside her again.

"What happened?"

"I am from a small mining planet called Bahadora. My parents mined precious minerals for use on other planets. On their way to deliver a shipment, they crash-landed here on Tatooine. Toku was the one who fixed up their ship, but he cheated them!" At this point, she balled her fist and a flash of anger burned in her eyes. "He charged them for repairs that I know were impossible! The price he asked was one that they could never pay, so he made them slaves. They had the same jobs as I do, as well as their mining. Then, when I was seven, they were killed in a mining accident and I had to take over here. I would've paid off my debt years ago, but Toku began adding things such as room and board so that I have no choice but to keep working. I fear it's the only life I will know." Her voice cracked and she looked down to hide the tears in her eyes. She refused to let them fall. Qui-Gon was silent for a long time. Saryu didn't seem to want to speak anymore. With a final glance at her, he finally left. She didn't seem to notice. At last, she stretched facedown on the bed and fell asleep.

Meanwhile, in a room down the hall, a heated conversation was taking place between a certian padawan and his master.
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Saryu awoke hours later. She sat up, disoriented. The suns hadn't come up yet, but she knew she was supposed to be getting ready for another day of slave labor. She had fallen asleep wrapped in her towel. She sat up on the edge of her bed and pulled the towel from her hair, which emerged as a giant yellow fuzzball. She sighed and quickly dressed before heading downstairs and outside. She stood on the steps and watched the suns rise, as she always did.

She looked over her shoulder, and then left and right. Convinced she was alone, she grabbed the broom that rested near the door and began twirling it. She made several parrys and jabs, and sliced invisible opponents to bits with her 'lightsaber.' She practiced for close to an hour before a mis-maneuver with her wrist made her drop the broom. There came a sudden burst of clapping from behind her. She whirled around to see who had been spying on her, only to see Qui-Gon beaming at her. She fixed him with a thunderous glare.

"That was pretty good. But when you go to spin it that way, do your wrist like this." He demonstrated the proper wrist-flip, but Saryu wasn't looking. She clenched her jaw, and picked up her broom, turning her back on him angrily. She looked down at her hand, her gaze softening.

"Thanks."

Qui-Gon drew his own real lightsaber, and the two practiced side by side. He taught her some new manueuvers, and allowed her time to practice and get used to them. He was rather stunned at her skill.

"How'd you get so good?" He teased. Saryu laughed.

"Well, to tell the truth, I practice every day. I try and do it at least an hour, and more if I can. I've done it ever since I came to this place." She said quietly. Qui-Gon was about to say something, but their attention was diverted to Arayla who was running towards them. She'd been out on the dunes since before sunup, and had a frantic look on her face.

"They're coming!" She screeched as she ran. Saryu's eyes widened and she grinned devilishly. She clutched her broom and turned in the direction Arayla had come from.

"Who's coming?" Qui-Gon asked.

"The massiffs!" Arayla said breathlessly. She took a moment to breathe as Qui-Gon looked back at Saryu.

"What?"

"Massiff. They're these huge desert beasts with wicked teeth and massive claws. They're a nasty business." Saryu explained.

"Then why are you going?" He asked, a little flabbergasted.

"Because." Saryu answered simply, as though that were a very obvious answer. Qui-Gon stared.

"But you can't go out alone!" He insisted. Saryu laughed.

"I'm not going alone! I've got my broom!" She said before darting over the dunes. Qui-Gon stared after her. She was very, very strange. Finally, he decided to follow, in case she needed some assistance.

Saryu reached the top of the first tall dune and stared out over the sand. They were coming. From the looks of it, there were only four of them. As they drew closer, Saryu's eyes widened. She knew this pack of troublesome creatures very well. "Krael." She hissed through her teeth. Saryu grinned inwardly. Finally, a real test of her Jedi skills! She giggled giddily before charging over the sand to meet them.

She reached the top of the second dune and stood her ground. The four beasts came to a stop and one stepped forward. Saryu hadn't been kidding when she said they were a nasty business. They stood a meter at the shoulder and they were covered in short, bristly fur. They had large, stiff spines that followed their backline to their haunches. The one who stood before her was the largest of the four. He was scarred from head to toe and missing an eye. The remaining eye was a peircing black, though dull with age, but still menacing nonetheless. Saryu stood strong against the snarling beasts and clutched her broom in front of her chest.

"Krael, go home! I thought I taught you a lesson the last time we met. And what about you three? T'rir? Sriad? Kal'daka? Didn't you four get enough of a beating?" At the last word, Krael snarled. He let out a roar, but Saryu didn't flinch. Instead, she smirked. Then she laughed. A merciless, mocking laughter. The four roared in fury, and so began a battle. They all attacked her at once and she managed to fight them off with her broom, giving them a few well-deserved smacks. They gave her a few slashes to the arms in retaliation, but the girl didn't seem to notice. She twirled the makeshift weapon and used all the moves she knew, plust the ones Qui-Gon had taught her earlier. She ended up flinging T'rir, Sriad, and Kal'daka into a pile and turned to face Krael.

The grizzled leader sprang forward, pouncing on the girl and pinning her on the ground. She held her broom in front of her, which served to block his claws and fangs. They slid down the dune with Krael pinning her down. She struggled beneath his weight, but it wasn't over yet. She had more tricks up her sleeve. She pushed her feet up under his haunches and forced him up. She went with, and they switched positions. She was sitting on his chest with him thrashing beneath her broom. Krael had more tricks up his sleeves, err, paws as well. Arching his back, he used both hind paws to deliver a nasty wound to her back. She flinched and cried out in pain and suprise. But she wouldn't give up that easily. She leaned forward and pushed herself up onto her hands. She pushed off with a springlike bounce and landed a few feet ahead of Krael. She smirked. She had another plan. Racing up the dune, she began leading the four furious beasts on a chase.

Buried somewhere in the desert was an ancient ship. All that was left of it was a switch that opened a door which dropped down into a deep pit somewhere in the bowels of the ship. Saryu knew exactly where it was. It was the vital role in her next plan. She ran on tirelessly, running up one dune and down the next. She had gained a distance on the animals, who hadn't given up their chase yet. Saryu slid down one dune and ran to the base of the next. Instead of running up it, she turned to face the top of the dune. Any second now and... there! The massiffs had raced over the top and were now making her way towards her. Or so they thought. With a grin, Saryu stepped on the switch. The metal doors slid apart to reveal a square of blackness that dipped several feet into the earth. Too late the beasts had seen the gaping maw of the ship, ready to devour them. They slid into it and Saryu laughed again. She walked around to the other side as T'rir tried to scramble out. She whacked him with her broom and swept him back in again. Finally, all four scrambled out of the other side. With an angry snarl, Krael led his pack back up the dunes. Saryu waved them off merrily. She walked back around and stepped on the switch again, closing the hatch. She swept sand over it and climbed the dunes once again.

On her climb up the final dune before home, she spotted Qui-Gon standing prominently on the top, Arayla's spyglass in hand. He was looking at her with a mixed expression of pride and disappointment. Saryu pretended not to notice and smiled cheerily at him. He gave a hopeless sigh and they walked back to the shop. She stood on the steps and dusted herself off while Qui-Gon went inside for another mysterious talk with that Count Dooku guy. Suddenly, Arayla gave a gasp from behind her.

"Saryu! Your back!" The startled cry made Saryu turn and look, but a sudden burning pain made her stiffen. She hadn't noticed the long slashes tracing the entirety of her lower back until now. She managed a sheepish grin and limped down the hallway to where their 'doctor' droid resided. She walked into the room and lay facedown on the table with a small laugh. The droid bustled over and stared coldly at Saryu.

"Child, what have you done to yourself now?" He said mechanically. Saryu smiled, then winced as he placed his cold hands on her bare skin.

"Just a little run-in with some massiffs. I'm sure you remember Krael from the last time." She was cut off by a small gasp.

"Child, you're not going to be happy until you're in a coffin, are you?" He said while going through his different cleaning materials. Saryu gave a small snort.

"Of course not. I'm going to have my body honored by burning it." She gave another small cry of pain and bit her lip as he poured some kind of cleaning fluid over her wounds. It burned like fire, and she clenched her fists until the pain subsided and he began wrapping her middle with gauze. She lay still while he washed and wrapped her arms. At last, he was finished before sitting up. She grinned at the droid and hopped off the table. She stepped out into the hallway and spotted Qui-Gon and Dooku speaking in the hallway. At her appearance, Dooku approached her.

"Saryu, I need to speak with you outside." She hesitantly followed the man down the hallway and out onto the steps. He stared at her a moment before speaking, making her slightly uncomfortable. "Saryu, Qui-Gon has told me everything. I need you to come with me." He said. He led her out to the airship, which someone had brought next to the shop earlier that day. She followed him on board, where he sat in a chair before her. "Let me see your hand, please." He asked. She looked at him reluctantly before holding out her hand. He took it, and held a metal object against her finger. She flinched as something pricked her flesh, but didn't draw back her hand until he released her. The machine beeped at him, and he looked at it. "Thank you." He said, waving her off. She stared at him a moment before exiting the ship.

She approached Qui-Gon, her finger stuck inside her mouth. Qui-Gon looked curiously at her for a moment, but he nodded in understanding.

"What was that thing?" She asked, looking at her finger.

"It was a device used to check your midi-chlorian count." He said simply. She gave him a blank stare, but he shook his head. He couln't tell her any more, for he didn't want to get her hopes up.
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I'll probably stop editing at Chapter 4, but it depends on whether I'm satisfied with it and whether you guys are satisfied with it.