Chapter 5.5 -
A/N: I don't really like this story but just to prove that I do still listen to your requests for updates on this thing. I need the occasional bit of prodding when I forget, that's all. :)
oooooooo
When Sara next woke she found her movement blocked by something that turned out to be Grissom's arms surrounding her body. One arm was draped over her side, where he was gently tracing circles on her hand with his thumb; the other resting lightly on her stomach. She could almost feel his relaxed smile even though she could not see it. It felt as if she hadn't slept as well as she had in those few hours in years. Which when she thought about it, was probably the truth.
The stress of everything over the past few months had certainly taken its toll. She felt it. Getting it off her chest was probably one of the best things she could have done. Keeping a secret like that, for that long is not healthy. She should know that. She had always thought that it was easy enough to keep things from people. Just keep quiet. She used to be quite good at that. This secret was bigger than most though, which may not have helped.
They both simply lay there for several minutes, basking in the relaxed atmosphere. They had always seemed to be able to communicate everything that they felt without needing the clichés that often seemed to come with words. A touch or a look conveyed everything that words could not, even if these were sometimes misinterpreted by both parties. It was a flaw in the system, but hopefully one that could be sorted out with a little work. If he wanted to work on it that was.
Sara was sure that the discomfort would kick in soon enough. It usually did. She took a deep breath. The subject had to be broached eventually. Better to try now rather than wait until later, when she would have probably lost the nerve. It might be easier when she was still in a half dreamlike state. She needed that kind of comfort right now.
"What should I tell them all? I don't have to say it's yours if you don't want." She murmured. She tipped her head back further into his chest breathing in the scent of whatever washing power he had used. She bit her lip almost wishing she hadn't said anything. She could imagine the response already, and it was not a cheerful thought.
"It's mine, and I wouldn't want it any other way. We'll just tell them. They're just going to have to get used to it." He softly kissed the top of her head. He didn't say anything for several moments. "Would you like something to eat?" Sara hadn't thought that his positive response would mean as much to her as it did. His reply was all she needed. It was all an approval, be it all but tacit, of their relationship. Not that they had ever really had one. It gave her hope that there might be one though, and that meant more to her than she would ever say.
"I can't manage anything more than toast right now. But that would be nice if you've got it." Grissom nodded, gently unwrapped himself from around her and pushed himself up from the sofa, "Sure, I'll see what I can find." His gaze lingered on her slightly tousled hair before he turned around, and walked out of her line of vision.
He wasn't entirely sure where this was going although he would be more than happy for it to stay exactly as it was right now. Problem was that he wasn't entirely sure that she felt the same way. It was a stalemate of sorts. Neither of them wanted to broach the subject. Fear of rejection seemed to prevail for both for various unspoken reasons. This state of miscommunication always seemed to cause a problem.
He returned to the room to find Sara had curled up and gone back to sleep. Grissom simply sat and watched her. Her mouth was moving slightly as if she were talking without sound in her sleep. It brought a small smile to his face, he couldn't help it.
Isn't it said that you know you love someone when you can spend the entire night, just sitting, watching them sleep. It was only now that he could really see how this was possible.
He carefully scooped his arms under her sleeping form and cradling her into his body he lifted her gently and transported her into his room laying her gently out on his bed pulling the covers up to her chin and kissing her on the forehead once more before seating himself on a chair across the room.
oooooo
It was not long before Sara woke again, normally she slept no more that four or five hours a night at the most, eight hours was almost a record for her. The warm cocoon that was surrounding her relaxed her in a way she had never felt before. It did not take her long to realize that she wasn't in her own bed; nor was she on Grissom's sofa anymore. Rather in his bed. It surprised her that such a private person as Grissom had voluntarily put her into his own bed. It was somewhere she had never been before, and hoped it might be somewhere she would be again, although she did worry that, that may be but a hopeless wish. She was still almost fully clothed, minus her shoes and jacket and seeing as there was only an hour or so until the beginning of shift figured it might be a very good idea to go home, have a shower and change. Showing up in the same clothes as she had worn yesterday might look a little suspicious. As if they didn't already doubt her responses.
She saw him sat in the chair across the room and it saddened her that it seemed he didn't even want to be in the same bed as her, after everything she thought he might have at least stretched himself to that. He'd still rather sit across the room. She pushed herself up put on her shoes and found her jacket before leaving a brief note stuck to the pillow. She took a quick look back when she reached the doorway, just to be sure he was still asleep, and carried on.
Sara spent the entire drive to her apartment in deep contemplation. Perhaps she should have woken him, told him she was going. A note seemed a little impersonal. She had of course by now locked herself out and couldn't really do anything about it, but worried unnecessarily all the same. She checked her watch, cursing briefly when she realized just how little time she had left herself for a turn-around. She still had a ten minute drive to her apartment, a shower and various other routine tasks before getting herself back to work. This was going to be tough to fit in.
Taking what must have been the quickest shower in existence; she made herself look vaguely presentable, she gave little thought to what she was wearing, and grabbed a peanut butter sandwich for 'breakfast' as she ran straight out the door again.
She considered that this was probably the reason she was so tired. Pregnancy or no, this lifestyle had to be having an impact. She would have to worry about slowing down later, just later. She figured that it would have become a problem before now if it was ever going to.
