Chapter 8: Men are like linoleum: Lay them right and you can walk all over
them for thirty years. By Grace Kelly (Stolen from a sign in the girl's
bathroom at a restaurant named Stumps)
"talking" 'thoughts' ::sounds:: New paragraphs and three little * are
indicators of new perspectives and/or scene changes.
**flash back**
Ryouga was in the midst of a fight. It was a beautiful afternoon. The sun was out, the sky was blue, and his opponent was Ranma. They were currently in the middle of the Nerima zoo. They had just recently broken a good size fountain, and now the water was gushing and overflowing onto the ground. To one side of Ryouga, there was a very deep enclosure that was complete with an island and a big swimming pool surrounding it for the Orange-striped tiger and the White-striped tiger. To the other side of Ryouga was a big pen of monkeys. There were at least twenty of them, and they were all being active and making noise.
The only thing on Ryouga's mind, though, was Ranma. Ranma was the sole person he blamed the troubles in his life. Ranma had run out on the fight, and now he even had a better a better Jusenkyou curse than he did. Life wasn't fair, and Ryouga blamed Ranma for it.
Ryouga was concentrating so much at demolishing his enemy, that he forgot there was even a crowd, and that's when the shit hit the fan.
It was one of Ryouga's basic techniques; he pulled out pieces of fabric that were razor sharp from his bandana, half of the fabric was in his hand as he pulled half a dozen from his hand. Ryouga added potential energy to the fabric as he span the fabric, adding to the angular acceleration. When the angular momentum was great enough, Ryouga snapped his wrist, and the projectiles flew on their pivotal points all across the battle field/park. It was similar to a boomer rang.
Ranma dodged the attack, having seen it from a mile away (figurative, of course, think hand to hand combat.) Both fighters dismissed the flying pieces of cloth as a failed attack. Both in fact were so concerned with keeping up their defenses while trying to overcome the other, that they were almost on a different plane than the plane me and you live in. That was, until they heard a scream.
Both fighters turned to see where it had come from. Ryouga was perplexed that it was a woman. Ranma recognized the woman as Kasumi. They realized there wasn't enough time, they weren't fast enough to get the girl out of harm's way.
Looking on horrified for those few seconds, the entire population of people gasped in horror in what was about to happen (if they even realized what was going on), before people could reach a complete brain wave, There was a blur where Kasumi just stood. To the average person, it was too fast for them to see clearly. Later, they would recall only seeing a blur, then hearing a crash seconds apart. For Ryouga, and Ranma it was different. They were martial artists, and they could see exactly what happened.
Ryouga had barely been able to see the blur as a human. He had never been that fast, he had always concentrated on his strength. He could see enough to know what's going on. His eyes could see, but his brain wasn't registering. When he had seen what he had done, his brain had gone into shock.
"Akane, are you okay?"
When Ryouga's thought processes started again that was the first think he heard.
'My god, what have I done?!?!?'
"Akane?" Ranma had concern in his voice, and was approaching the girl he had been walking with that afternoon. All Ryouga could do, was to stand in the same place as before and look on the whole scene dumbly.
Akane paused before she gave a slight nod. Ranma let out a breath that he hadn't realized he was holding. She slowly, almost painstakingly, got to her feet while still carrying Kasumi. With out a word, she started home, apparently too distracted to know/care if Ranma had anything else to say. Akane Left a very disturbed Ranma in her tracks as she limped away, he was still staring at the spot she just vacated when he felt a hand on his shoulder.
Ryouga's mind and body had a meeting, and decided (finally) that he should probably not just stand there. Ranma and the girl, Akane, had been talking in whispered tones. Then the girl left. Ryouga did the only thing he thought of, he grabbed Ranma's shoulder.
"Ranma, I'm sorry. In case I can't find them will you tell her?" Ranma just nodded his stood up and started to walk away. Only stopping to pick Akane's fallen lock of hair.
Ryouga was still looking at where Ranma and Akane had made their exit. Still in deep turmoil. Moments after Ranma left. There was murmuring among the crowd, which was silenced by a girl still in a school uniform that sported a short hair cut. Even though the girl was standing behind him and to his left a little bit, he could feel her cold stare. First, she glared at the crowd, the crowd shivered and they never talked about the incident again. Her gaze landed on his back until he thought that his flesh was going to be burned off, just like what liquid nitrogen does to the body when it touches the flesh. Just when it became unbearable, he turned his head to say something and suddenly found himself in the middle of South Africa.
'Argh. Where the hell am I now? Curse my inability to turn my head without getting lost! I REALLY need to get back to Nerima. I can't believe I did that. I..just.. wanted to harm Ranma. I never wanted to harm innocent people, I never want to hurt somebody who is weaker than me. I'm really glad that girl was there. I wonder who she is? She MUST be a martial artist. She's REALLY fast, and probably just as skilled. I wonder what school she practices. don't get off topic. I must get back to Japan. I must apologize to that lady and girl in person. I don't want to create enemies while exacting my revenge. I just want to go back home, when I eventually find it, and live my life out in peace and quite. Maybe I'll get a girlfriend and get married and raise children. but now isn't the time to think about the distant future. I NEED to get back to Nerima to destroy Ranma and his happiness and to apologize. I wonder if they'll forgive me?"
Ryouga was in such a disoriented state, that he was actually walking in the right direction. It only took him a day to get back to Japan, and now it was about midnight, Ryouga looked up and found himself in front of the place he had been searching for.
"Ten.Do.Do..Jo. The Tendo Dojo. I made it!"
Ryouga was too overjoyed that he had actually made it there to say anything else for about five minutes. He was memorizing the hue of the sky, the beauty of the moon, alignment of the planets, and the formation of the stars. He took note of the crickets playing there sad melodies, and the ant..
Suddenly Ryouga snapped out of his euphoria when he realized he better go in before he got lost, again.
"Tonight Ranma, Tonight's the night you are going to pay!"
Instead of rushing into the house and frantically searching for his opponent, Ryouga decided to walk slowly through the house following the right handed rule (follow the walls while keeping you right hand on the wall.)
Two hours and several closets later. Ryouga pushed open the door of Ranma and Akane's bedroom.
Akane was having a hard time falling asleep. After the excitement tonight, something wasn't sitting well with her. Ranma had long ago attained the bliss of sleep, but Akane was still half awake and trying to preoccupy her thoughts by the sound of his steadily beating heart. It didn't work though, and her thoughts became more sinister. 'If Ranma's enemies are starting to show up, when will mine? They can't be far away. Sensei had told me he would try to keep them off my back for as long as possible, but how long will that be? Oh well, you can't live your life in fear when you are a martial artist. I should go to bed.'
A few minutes later.
'This isn't working. Kodachi, grr, I CAN'T believe she did that to Ranma. Eww. I'll get her good! But enough of this I should be asleep.' By now it is two in the morning. Akane finally calmed herself down enough to be in a half conscious mode. She was embracing the last step before the all mighty wave of blissful sleep over took her, when she heard the door knob turn, and the door open.
"Who are you?"
Ryouga was standing in the doorway. He stood stock still. The darkness was talking to him. Sure there was moon light from the window but it didn't quiet reach the other half of the room. Ryouga assumed that the voice was coming from a bed, but he could be wrong.
"Hi, Sorry, I was looking for Ranma, I need to speak to him."
"Who are you?"
"I'm Ryouga Hibiki."
"Okay, I'll let you talk to him. On one condition, you tell me why you are taking revenge on Ranma."
"Why should I do that?"
"Because you couldn't find him on your own if you tried for a week."
"."
"Besides, he's my friend I would like to know what horrible thing he has happened to you."
"Well, it all started with." Ryouga described the battle zone commonly known as the cafeteria of an all boys high school, and how Ranma always stole his bread. "And then he skipped out on the duel and ran to China. I followed him, and that's when I saw hell."
"What's this hell you speak of?"
"I don't have to answer that."
"I don't have to show you where Ranma is."
"Promise not to hate me? Or make fun of me? Or think differently of me?"
"Upon my word as a martial artist."
"Well, There I was in the middle of rural China. I was on a cliff overlooking a bunch of springs with bamboo shoots sticking out of them. When suddenly a panda running panda knocked me off balance and a girl kicked me in the head causing me to slip off the cliff and fall head first into one of the springs.."
"and?"
"When doused with cold water I turn into a little black piglet."
"Really? That's not so bad."
"NOT SO BAD!!!"
"Shh. you don't want to wake up the entire house, do you?"
"You've got no idea the horrors I've been through because that curse, I. wait I minute you don't mind the curse?"
"No, not really. Here's Ranma."
Ryouga had been keeping his eyes on the dark outline of the bed, he still couldn't see anything, but he did hear an audible ::thump:: and a groan.
"Ungh?"
Ranma squinted up to make out the form of Akane still lying in bed. He couldn't make out much because it was dark in the room.
"Ranma, you have a visitor!"
Ranma rose from the floor, and into the light so that Ryouga could see him.
"Who? Ack. Ryouga? How did you get here so fast?"
Akane giggled from her position on the bed. It was really much too early in the morning for regular thought processes to start.
"Why, Ranma, to fight you. Of course, Now go on you two don't chat all day, do you want to get this over with or not? And one more thing, TRY to be quiet and not wake up the entire house? Goodnight!"
With that both males in the room, heard rather than saw Akane roll over and go back to bed. Ranma walked over to the window and opened it.
"Let's go out this way."
Ryouga followed Ranma closely, his mind now totally consumed of the prospect of fighting.
Even though neither of them yelled, screamed, talked, or even whispered, for neither really wanted to know the wrath of Akane. It could be said that it was indeed a silent fight. Except for all the noise of the scuffle itself, so instead of sounding like a fight, it sounded more like a burglary attempt.
About a half an hour after the first punch was thrown, Akane heard a soft knocking on her door.
"Coming!"
Akane silently got out of bed and opened the door. She found both of her sisters outside her door. Their faces dimly shown in the moonlight, and it was enough to give away how scared they were.
"Come on in!"
Both girls filed into her bedroom. They turned around, and Kasumi spoke first.
"Did you hear those noises?"
"Noises? Oh, you must mean Ranma and Ryouga. They're fighting in the back yard."
Nabiki sat down on the chair and let out a sigh of relief. "Oh? We thought it was a robber or something." Nabiki looked more than a little relieved, and by a second glance so was Kasumi.
There was an awkward silence between the three sisters, or it might be more accurate to describe it as two siblings and a stranger. In either case it was awkward, it was so silent in the room that you could hear a pin drop, or is would have been silent if the only sound in the room was the sound of the scuffle outside.
"I think.. I'll go down there and 'persuade' them to fight somewhere else."
Akane practically flew from the room, the heavy air in the room was having an effect on her.
"I though I *told* you two not to wake up the entire house!?!"
Akane looked *real* intimidating in her wrinkled shirt and pajama bottoms while trying to straighten her ruffled hair and rubbing sleep from her eyes. Then again, looks can be deceiving.
Ranma was getting ready to attack Ryouga from across the koi pond, when his head snapped towards the porch where Akane was heading. In accordance to anime rule #345 which states: Even if the character had enough momentum to make it over what ever space they were trying to mount, if the character loses concentration the character will fall straight down. Ranma did fall, he fell square in the middle of the Koi pond.
Ryouga, who was standing by the edge of the koi pond, was getting ready to defend himself when he heard Akane yell out to them. Ryouga was distracted in that one second space it took Ranma to fall into the koi pond. The price for Ryouga's distraction: his humanity.
When Ranma surfaced from the koi pond, he gasped for air. It was rather cold outside now that he was wet. Ranma wanted to shiver when a breeze hit him, but he was too distracted to let his body respond.
"Where's Ryouga?"
The, oh, so observant Ranma didn't notice the pile of clothes laying in a pile where Ryouga had just been until a second ago.
"Ryouga! Get back here!"
Ranma jumped out of the koi pond at full speed, and in two leaps was over the compound wall and well on his way down the street.
Akane, who had watched the whole thing through sleep ridden eyes, now counted her fingers to make sure two plus two still equaled four. She finally concluded that Ranma was a blind idiot, and went across the yard to pick up Ryouga's clothes that were now in a crumpled pile by the koi pond. Akane knelt down and looked closely at the clothes.
"Ryouga?"
Akane smiled when she saw a little black snout popping out of the top of the shirt. She picked the bundle up, piglet and all, and headed towards the kitchen.
A steaming kettle of water, yes a steaming kettle of water, funny how such a common occurrence could be such of such focus in a persons life. Oh, the thought of the nice and round golden goddess of the hot water. The sweet and indiscriminate goddess who gives all what they need, and yet the tingly sensation of the too hot water goes away within a few seconds, and it hardly takes away the joys of receiving such a gift as a hot kettle. There was only one down turn of the kettle goddess, she gives the gift you ask for, but she seems to have a sense of humor. Either that, or she doesn't care who you are and what situation you are in as long as you get what you want.
So Ryouga sat on the floor near his clothes watching Akane, grateful yet fearful, grateful that she was so nice to him, and dreading the embarrassment that this would cause. You see, not only does he turn human; he turns into a naked human.
Akane kept glancing at Ryouga. She wanted to make sure that he didn't lose himself. The world was hard enough to survive in as a human; she didn't even want to know what it would be like to live it as a piglet. Finally, it was warm enough to pour on Ryouga. Akane walked over to where Ryouga was patiently waiting. Both people closed their eyes as the water began to flow over the piglet's /soon-to-be Ryouga's head.
'God, it seems to be getting colder and colder out here. Where the hell is Ryouga? Gee, what a sight I must be. Ok, I'm just a random red-head girl at the moment. I am running down the street at three in the morning. Of course, I'm only wearing my regular boxers and undershirt, which happens to be white and rather see-through. Also, on top of that, there's also the fact that I happen to be a double-D cup size, and I have no bra on... yep I must be every dirty man's fantasy.' A shiver went down Ranma's spine. He is VERY self conscious about how he looked as a female. It just didn't make him comfortable having guys drooling all over him.
"Ryouga, where the hell are you?"
Ranma was still running, he was almost he was almost at Doctor Tofu's, He had been running up a down every street and alley way in the area. 'Oh well, I tried, he'll find me eventually.' With that Ranma turned around and started back towards the Tendo Dojo while half heartedly trying to find Ryouga.
Akane and the former pig, Ryouga, were sitting at the table sipping at tea. Except for the occasional sound of a sip, the room was deathly quiet. Akane kept glancing at the clock, and Ryouga found the grooves in the wood table awfully interesting. They sat in silence, and silence sat with them. So, in other words if it weren't for the occasional sip of tea, a person could be fooled into believing everyone was in bed and getting a decent night's sleep, leaving people to wonder why the lights were on in that room down stairs. The silence was so thick, it could be cut with a steak knife, or the Russian Rusty Red Hot Spork of Doom. The silence was so heavy that little ants were crushed by the weight of it.
'Thank god I'm home! I'm freezing! That's it I'm taking a shower and going to bed'
Ranma walked into the doorway, wiped his feet on the welcome mat, and walked silently towards the stares. On the way to the stairs, though, Ranma saw a light in the family room, and decided to look and see who exactly was up. He opened the door and. "Ryouga!"
Ryouga, surprised, Jumped from the table and landed in a defensive. Seeing that it was Ranma, Ryouga acted on conditioned reflex.
"Prepare to Die!"
Ryouga lunged towards Ranma, but never got there. He never even saw it coming. All of a sudden, I mean in mere milliseconds. Ryouga was pinned against the wall by several bladed objects, and he felt a razor sharp metallic object placed on his jugular. He couldn't have swallowed if he tried. The only thing he could do was to stare into Akane's chestnut eyes.
"Listen, Ryouga keep your voice down or I'll rip out your voice box. There are people trying to sleep in this house and it would be appreciated if you wouldn't disturb them."
With that Akane turned her back on Ryouga, and the weapons that had previously pinned Ryouga suddenly seemed to disappear. Ryouga stood stalk still, too shocked to move. Akane moved towards the door, she half opened the door and took a step to walk outside before turning her head to speak to Ranma.
"You must be freezing! Might I suggest you both take a shower before retiring for the night."
With that Akane seemed to disappear, her shadow may have stayed only just slightly longer than body did.
Seconds later Akane was in bed once again. 'Geez. Boys, they have no respect for those around them, making noises at all hours of the night. Males are so frustrating sometimes. I wonder where Ryouga is going to sleep tonight?'
Akane decided that she didn't want to be waken up with the problem, so she took a little pillow off the bed and placed it on the corner of the desk. She had a hunch that Ryouga was going to be in pig form when he was looking for a bed. She promptly fell asleep, too exhausted to care how things would turn out.
Downstairs..
Both males blinked at the vacant spot where Akane had just been. Ranma snapped out of the trance like state they had been in first, and took action. He took Ryouga by the collar and forcefully dragged him to the bathroom.
When they had both stripped naked, Ranma dragged Ryouga into the furo by the back of his bandana, he wasn't too gentle and sent Ryouga flying towards the tub, which had been filled, but was now cooled down to the temperature of the air outside. In other words, the water was cold.
"Squee!"
Ryouga let out a single squee as he struggled not to drown in the tub, pigs aren't exactly buoyant, but Ryouga didn't want his voice box removed from his body. Just enough noise to knock Ranma out of his stupor of finding his friend suddenly transformed. Ranma reached into the tub, picked Ryouga up by his bandana and hoisted him up so that they were eye level.
Time almost stopped for Ryouga, he was mortified. What was his biggest enemy going to say about his curse? How much would Ranma poke fun at him? What would be his first words be? Why did he have to find out? Ryouga's thought processes were running time and a half, while his body decided it would be fun to stop breathing.
Ranma was surprised when his friend had transformed. Now, he was picking him up from the tub. 'Hell, yep, hell' Ranma's only thought processes on the relatively short haul of Ryouga from tub to eye level.
Ranma looked directly into Ryouga's eyes with all the sympathy and compassion he could muster, and took in a deep breath.
"Look man, I'm sorry about your curse. Believe me, I understand what you're going through. I'm serious, I'm truly sorry about it."
The words of apology/sympathy were foreign on Ranma's tongue and in order to convince himself that he had even said it the first time, he apologized twice.
Ryouga had glared into Ranma's face while he was saying it. He was deeply searching for any sign of Ranma lying, but all his face showed was honesty. Sure, the words he was saying didn't match what he usually said, but he was deeply sincere about what he said. It seemed to satisfy Ryouga, somewhat.
Soon, they were both sitting in the bath tub male and human, human and male. Both men in deep thought.
"So."
Ranma wanted to break the oppressive silence.
"What happened?"
"Well, after a certain coward in the room that shall remain nameless, skipped out on our fight. I was forced to follow him to China."
"Ryouga, I waited for you on the lot behind your house for three days." Ryouga ignored the comment.
"I searched for the coward for weeks, and then one day I was standing on a cliff looking down at a strange place that was misty with a lot of little pools with bamboo poles sticking out. And then a panda came running up from behind me and ran into me. I was regaining my balance when a girl with red hair and a pig tail kicked me into the valley below. If it weren't for the girl I wouldn't have been cursed!"
"Umm. you blamed ME for seeing hell, shouldn't you be directing your anger towards that girl and her panda. wait a minute.. a girl and a.."
Just then Genma had the sudden urge to take a bath. We will never be sure why, but many will presume it was just the fact that Genma took pride in doing everything possible opportunity to screw Ranma out of happiness and complicating situations. He saw Ranma and Ryouga and decided to wait until the morning, and left.
Ryouga was shocked to see that the Tendos had a pet panda, then it clicked.
"A panda.. And a girl. Die!"
Ryouga lunged towards Ranma who was already getting out of the tub. Ranma quickly squirted Ryouga with could water from the faucet.
"Listen Ryouga, I don't want to piss off Akane, and I don't particularly want to lose my voice box. So stop this!"
Ryouga was livid, but the Akane incident was still at the top of his head. So he decided that the vengeance of heaven is slow but sure, and that he could wait until the morning to deliver a quick yet painful death to Ranma.
Ranma decided he had enough bathing for one night, and got dressed. He almost, not quite forgot to grab Ryouga. Both of them crept quietly up the stairs, so painstakingly quite that Ranma didn't even voice his pain when he stubbed his toe on the top stair. Ranma bit his lip while Ryouga looked smug.
The door slid with a slight creaky noise, it normally wouldn't have been loud enough for the two martial artists to even take notice of, but now it made both of them flinch. Ranma opened his mouth to speak, then he thought better of it. He decided that not waking Akane would be a good option. Ranma was creeping towards the bed, stopping once or twice to step around imaginary stepping stones. Total stealth mode. Ranma was about to nudge Akane and ask her what the hell he was supposed to do about Ryouga, when the moonlight highlighting the cushion pillow on the desk. Ranma discarded Ryouga onto the cushion pillow similar to how a little child puts away a toy at the end of the day: none too gently. He quickly climbed into bed with Akane, and was asleep before his head hit the pillow. Leaving an indignant pig glaring at him until the glaring pig gave up and settled down for sleep.
Ryouga lay on his cushion thinking, no matter how angry he had been at Ranma, he couldn't seem to find any at the moment. His mind kept wandering to less important and less violent thoughts about Ranma. Mostly, though, he pondered the relationship of the two people in the bed. One side effect of his curse, you see, was a sharper sense of smell. Ryouga could smell ki. When people touch each other, a ki signature is left on the persons body for a temporary amount of time, so he could smell if a person had recently been touched, hugged, kissed, and/or had **cough**.
Okay, so smell may not be the best word for it. Ryouga didn't really "smell" per say, just like Ranma couldn't "see" Akane doing her ki manipulation. It is impossible to see, hear, touch, or smell. People only perceive that they are. Ki is the energy your body has in order to do daily tasks like walking or peeing. Energy is neither created nor destroyed only transferred into other mediums. So, then, how do people get away with describing ki? They explain ki by using senses that people normally possess like sight, touch, smell, taste, and hearing. Everybody, at some point in their life could have sworn that animals have some magical ability to make people feel better. How do they know? They don't, but they can (at least in theory) sense disturbances in people's ki. That's why a trained dog can warn people if they are going to have a seizure, and why people live longer if they have a pet. When I say Ryouga "smelt" I mean like someone says they can taste the smell of ever green or taste the scent of chocolate, or smell the rain or snow. Those words don't exactly fit, but the general population nods their head and knows exactly what they're talking about. Pigs may have keen eyesight, but Ryouga could have sworn he could smell the ki fields of those around him. In fact, though it was Ryouga's seventh sense telling him to interpret what he was feeling as a smell. Ryouga tried not to smell these two people, but curiosity kills the little black piglet, and what he smelled didn't match what he knew was going on in the bed.
'Now that's odd. Their ki is very similar, VERY similar, it's hard to smell the difference. There's one thing though, their ki's are TOTALLY separate. I mean usually people who are just friends, they at least smell like they've touched each other. It smells like this is the first time they had ever met was tonight and this was the first time that he had ever been in her bed. I KNOW better because I heard how Akane shoved Ranma out of the bed. I wonder what their relationship is? I mean he IS sleeping with her. They're too old to be sharing a bed and just be friends. They haven't kissed, hugged, or done anything intimate so they probably aren't married. Maybe she's his girlfriend? But wouldn't they have kissed, or at least held hands? I wish I could ask Ranma, now it's going to bother me all night. Look at him, he seems to have gotten on nicely with his life even after he got cursed. Maybe I should try that. I should give this all up and get a girlfriend and settle down.' Ryouga seriously debated calling it quits, then he shook his little piggy head 'That little bastard, he has such a perfect life: a home a family and a cute girlfriend. He DESERVES some grief in his life, and I'm going to give it to him. Maybe I can try to settle down while still trying to get revenge, just not tell anybody. It's about time I had a place I could call home, and it's about time I get to know somebody I can call a friend.' Yes you heard that right, you didn't read it wrong. Ryouga decided that Ranma and him were friends, and because they were friends it was his job to cause Ranma grief for his past actions. He's a sort of Jiminy Cricket of the modern age. Ryouga drifted from one thought to the next until he finally fell asleep.
End Chapter
IAN (Interactive author's notes)
Get a sheet of paper a write down: an -ing verb verb adjective action verb adjective
Now read and fill in the blanks with the appropriate words
Ranma and Akane were -ing verb on the couch, when Ukyou suddenly verb in the room. Ukyou looked really adjective and had a strange look on her face. Ranma asked Ukyou what was the matter. Ukyou action verb from the room in tears, leaving a very adjective Ranma and Akane behind.
THAT was a REALLY BAD reenactment of an ad-lib. You know, the funny little pamphlets you used to pick up at the dollar store. It's supposed to be funny how the wrong word fits so perfectly in the blank. I think someone should do a REAL ad-lib fanfiction. I would read it and get a few kicks out of it. I'm surprised nobody has done this REALLY easy fanfic idea yet.
I remember why I was avoiding descriptions: descriptions are the devil. I once read a fanfic, it was REALLY good, except the author was ranting about a yellow dress for a chapter and a half, and two chapters later the SAME dress was blue. Let's just say that anything that doesn't make sense, or doesn't add up is made either with or without my knowledge, and it would be appreciated if it would be pointed out. Sometimes, it was just because when I was reading it over, it wasn't a spelling or grammer mistake. Sometimes it is just something I haven't explained yet. Author's do that to people so that when they read more of the story they go "OOOHHHH NOW I GET IT!!!". It could just be that the detail was so insignificant that this author didn't care, or it made sense to her because it's been in her head, and reads it differently from the reader. In any case let me know. I'll do more details, or at least try.
I'm sorry for the shortness of this chapter, hopefully I'll get Kodachi over with next chapter.
Note To self: never EVER incorporate anything like REAL physics to anime EVER again. After I posted it, it was brought to my attention that I had forgotten to consult my Physics book. So I consulted my Physics book, and I rewrote the bandana part. The only problem now is applying it to the real world. Okay, so I have a little too much time on my hands. I ACTUALLY tried it to make sure that I had actually got it right. Try this at home at some point please: 1) find a bandana/piece of cloth, and fold it so that it has three corners 2) try and spin the cloth 3) find out that the cloth doesn't spin well or fast enough to be conclusive 4) Tie identical knots on either end of where you folded the bandana. 5) try spinning the cloth by holding it on the knot and then throw it 6) hold the bandana so that the knot is hanging out of the bottom of your hand (you should be grasping the middle of the cloth) spin and toss the bandana 7) fold the bandana again so that both of the knots are being spun and fling it.
I found that no matter how I threw it, it didn't really spin after I let go of the cloth. Sure it went farther than I thought it would, but it didn't spin. ::shrugs:: technically it wasn't even the stupid bandanas that cut off Akane's hair, but Ryouga's belt, but this is an AU so I'm allowed to have discrepancies here and there. Please let me know if you ACTUALLY tried it and got different results, I'm curious.
Questions? Comments? Concerns? DEBATES? It's called reviewing/email/Aim/ICQ
Ryouga was in the midst of a fight. It was a beautiful afternoon. The sun was out, the sky was blue, and his opponent was Ranma. They were currently in the middle of the Nerima zoo. They had just recently broken a good size fountain, and now the water was gushing and overflowing onto the ground. To one side of Ryouga, there was a very deep enclosure that was complete with an island and a big swimming pool surrounding it for the Orange-striped tiger and the White-striped tiger. To the other side of Ryouga was a big pen of monkeys. There were at least twenty of them, and they were all being active and making noise.
The only thing on Ryouga's mind, though, was Ranma. Ranma was the sole person he blamed the troubles in his life. Ranma had run out on the fight, and now he even had a better a better Jusenkyou curse than he did. Life wasn't fair, and Ryouga blamed Ranma for it.
Ryouga was concentrating so much at demolishing his enemy, that he forgot there was even a crowd, and that's when the shit hit the fan.
It was one of Ryouga's basic techniques; he pulled out pieces of fabric that were razor sharp from his bandana, half of the fabric was in his hand as he pulled half a dozen from his hand. Ryouga added potential energy to the fabric as he span the fabric, adding to the angular acceleration. When the angular momentum was great enough, Ryouga snapped his wrist, and the projectiles flew on their pivotal points all across the battle field/park. It was similar to a boomer rang.
Ranma dodged the attack, having seen it from a mile away (figurative, of course, think hand to hand combat.) Both fighters dismissed the flying pieces of cloth as a failed attack. Both in fact were so concerned with keeping up their defenses while trying to overcome the other, that they were almost on a different plane than the plane me and you live in. That was, until they heard a scream.
Both fighters turned to see where it had come from. Ryouga was perplexed that it was a woman. Ranma recognized the woman as Kasumi. They realized there wasn't enough time, they weren't fast enough to get the girl out of harm's way.
Looking on horrified for those few seconds, the entire population of people gasped in horror in what was about to happen (if they even realized what was going on), before people could reach a complete brain wave, There was a blur where Kasumi just stood. To the average person, it was too fast for them to see clearly. Later, they would recall only seeing a blur, then hearing a crash seconds apart. For Ryouga, and Ranma it was different. They were martial artists, and they could see exactly what happened.
Ryouga had barely been able to see the blur as a human. He had never been that fast, he had always concentrated on his strength. He could see enough to know what's going on. His eyes could see, but his brain wasn't registering. When he had seen what he had done, his brain had gone into shock.
"Akane, are you okay?"
When Ryouga's thought processes started again that was the first think he heard.
'My god, what have I done?!?!?'
"Akane?" Ranma had concern in his voice, and was approaching the girl he had been walking with that afternoon. All Ryouga could do, was to stand in the same place as before and look on the whole scene dumbly.
Akane paused before she gave a slight nod. Ranma let out a breath that he hadn't realized he was holding. She slowly, almost painstakingly, got to her feet while still carrying Kasumi. With out a word, she started home, apparently too distracted to know/care if Ranma had anything else to say. Akane Left a very disturbed Ranma in her tracks as she limped away, he was still staring at the spot she just vacated when he felt a hand on his shoulder.
Ryouga's mind and body had a meeting, and decided (finally) that he should probably not just stand there. Ranma and the girl, Akane, had been talking in whispered tones. Then the girl left. Ryouga did the only thing he thought of, he grabbed Ranma's shoulder.
"Ranma, I'm sorry. In case I can't find them will you tell her?" Ranma just nodded his stood up and started to walk away. Only stopping to pick Akane's fallen lock of hair.
Ryouga was still looking at where Ranma and Akane had made their exit. Still in deep turmoil. Moments after Ranma left. There was murmuring among the crowd, which was silenced by a girl still in a school uniform that sported a short hair cut. Even though the girl was standing behind him and to his left a little bit, he could feel her cold stare. First, she glared at the crowd, the crowd shivered and they never talked about the incident again. Her gaze landed on his back until he thought that his flesh was going to be burned off, just like what liquid nitrogen does to the body when it touches the flesh. Just when it became unbearable, he turned his head to say something and suddenly found himself in the middle of South Africa.
'Argh. Where the hell am I now? Curse my inability to turn my head without getting lost! I REALLY need to get back to Nerima. I can't believe I did that. I..just.. wanted to harm Ranma. I never wanted to harm innocent people, I never want to hurt somebody who is weaker than me. I'm really glad that girl was there. I wonder who she is? She MUST be a martial artist. She's REALLY fast, and probably just as skilled. I wonder what school she practices. don't get off topic. I must get back to Japan. I must apologize to that lady and girl in person. I don't want to create enemies while exacting my revenge. I just want to go back home, when I eventually find it, and live my life out in peace and quite. Maybe I'll get a girlfriend and get married and raise children. but now isn't the time to think about the distant future. I NEED to get back to Nerima to destroy Ranma and his happiness and to apologize. I wonder if they'll forgive me?"
Ryouga was in such a disoriented state, that he was actually walking in the right direction. It only took him a day to get back to Japan, and now it was about midnight, Ryouga looked up and found himself in front of the place he had been searching for.
"Ten.Do.Do..Jo. The Tendo Dojo. I made it!"
Ryouga was too overjoyed that he had actually made it there to say anything else for about five minutes. He was memorizing the hue of the sky, the beauty of the moon, alignment of the planets, and the formation of the stars. He took note of the crickets playing there sad melodies, and the ant..
Suddenly Ryouga snapped out of his euphoria when he realized he better go in before he got lost, again.
"Tonight Ranma, Tonight's the night you are going to pay!"
Instead of rushing into the house and frantically searching for his opponent, Ryouga decided to walk slowly through the house following the right handed rule (follow the walls while keeping you right hand on the wall.)
Two hours and several closets later. Ryouga pushed open the door of Ranma and Akane's bedroom.
Akane was having a hard time falling asleep. After the excitement tonight, something wasn't sitting well with her. Ranma had long ago attained the bliss of sleep, but Akane was still half awake and trying to preoccupy her thoughts by the sound of his steadily beating heart. It didn't work though, and her thoughts became more sinister. 'If Ranma's enemies are starting to show up, when will mine? They can't be far away. Sensei had told me he would try to keep them off my back for as long as possible, but how long will that be? Oh well, you can't live your life in fear when you are a martial artist. I should go to bed.'
A few minutes later.
'This isn't working. Kodachi, grr, I CAN'T believe she did that to Ranma. Eww. I'll get her good! But enough of this I should be asleep.' By now it is two in the morning. Akane finally calmed herself down enough to be in a half conscious mode. She was embracing the last step before the all mighty wave of blissful sleep over took her, when she heard the door knob turn, and the door open.
"Who are you?"
Ryouga was standing in the doorway. He stood stock still. The darkness was talking to him. Sure there was moon light from the window but it didn't quiet reach the other half of the room. Ryouga assumed that the voice was coming from a bed, but he could be wrong.
"Hi, Sorry, I was looking for Ranma, I need to speak to him."
"Who are you?"
"I'm Ryouga Hibiki."
"Okay, I'll let you talk to him. On one condition, you tell me why you are taking revenge on Ranma."
"Why should I do that?"
"Because you couldn't find him on your own if you tried for a week."
"."
"Besides, he's my friend I would like to know what horrible thing he has happened to you."
"Well, it all started with." Ryouga described the battle zone commonly known as the cafeteria of an all boys high school, and how Ranma always stole his bread. "And then he skipped out on the duel and ran to China. I followed him, and that's when I saw hell."
"What's this hell you speak of?"
"I don't have to answer that."
"I don't have to show you where Ranma is."
"Promise not to hate me? Or make fun of me? Or think differently of me?"
"Upon my word as a martial artist."
"Well, There I was in the middle of rural China. I was on a cliff overlooking a bunch of springs with bamboo shoots sticking out of them. When suddenly a panda running panda knocked me off balance and a girl kicked me in the head causing me to slip off the cliff and fall head first into one of the springs.."
"and?"
"When doused with cold water I turn into a little black piglet."
"Really? That's not so bad."
"NOT SO BAD!!!"
"Shh. you don't want to wake up the entire house, do you?"
"You've got no idea the horrors I've been through because that curse, I. wait I minute you don't mind the curse?"
"No, not really. Here's Ranma."
Ryouga had been keeping his eyes on the dark outline of the bed, he still couldn't see anything, but he did hear an audible ::thump:: and a groan.
"Ungh?"
Ranma squinted up to make out the form of Akane still lying in bed. He couldn't make out much because it was dark in the room.
"Ranma, you have a visitor!"
Ranma rose from the floor, and into the light so that Ryouga could see him.
"Who? Ack. Ryouga? How did you get here so fast?"
Akane giggled from her position on the bed. It was really much too early in the morning for regular thought processes to start.
"Why, Ranma, to fight you. Of course, Now go on you two don't chat all day, do you want to get this over with or not? And one more thing, TRY to be quiet and not wake up the entire house? Goodnight!"
With that both males in the room, heard rather than saw Akane roll over and go back to bed. Ranma walked over to the window and opened it.
"Let's go out this way."
Ryouga followed Ranma closely, his mind now totally consumed of the prospect of fighting.
Even though neither of them yelled, screamed, talked, or even whispered, for neither really wanted to know the wrath of Akane. It could be said that it was indeed a silent fight. Except for all the noise of the scuffle itself, so instead of sounding like a fight, it sounded more like a burglary attempt.
About a half an hour after the first punch was thrown, Akane heard a soft knocking on her door.
"Coming!"
Akane silently got out of bed and opened the door. She found both of her sisters outside her door. Their faces dimly shown in the moonlight, and it was enough to give away how scared they were.
"Come on in!"
Both girls filed into her bedroom. They turned around, and Kasumi spoke first.
"Did you hear those noises?"
"Noises? Oh, you must mean Ranma and Ryouga. They're fighting in the back yard."
Nabiki sat down on the chair and let out a sigh of relief. "Oh? We thought it was a robber or something." Nabiki looked more than a little relieved, and by a second glance so was Kasumi.
There was an awkward silence between the three sisters, or it might be more accurate to describe it as two siblings and a stranger. In either case it was awkward, it was so silent in the room that you could hear a pin drop, or is would have been silent if the only sound in the room was the sound of the scuffle outside.
"I think.. I'll go down there and 'persuade' them to fight somewhere else."
Akane practically flew from the room, the heavy air in the room was having an effect on her.
"I though I *told* you two not to wake up the entire house!?!"
Akane looked *real* intimidating in her wrinkled shirt and pajama bottoms while trying to straighten her ruffled hair and rubbing sleep from her eyes. Then again, looks can be deceiving.
Ranma was getting ready to attack Ryouga from across the koi pond, when his head snapped towards the porch where Akane was heading. In accordance to anime rule #345 which states: Even if the character had enough momentum to make it over what ever space they were trying to mount, if the character loses concentration the character will fall straight down. Ranma did fall, he fell square in the middle of the Koi pond.
Ryouga, who was standing by the edge of the koi pond, was getting ready to defend himself when he heard Akane yell out to them. Ryouga was distracted in that one second space it took Ranma to fall into the koi pond. The price for Ryouga's distraction: his humanity.
When Ranma surfaced from the koi pond, he gasped for air. It was rather cold outside now that he was wet. Ranma wanted to shiver when a breeze hit him, but he was too distracted to let his body respond.
"Where's Ryouga?"
The, oh, so observant Ranma didn't notice the pile of clothes laying in a pile where Ryouga had just been until a second ago.
"Ryouga! Get back here!"
Ranma jumped out of the koi pond at full speed, and in two leaps was over the compound wall and well on his way down the street.
Akane, who had watched the whole thing through sleep ridden eyes, now counted her fingers to make sure two plus two still equaled four. She finally concluded that Ranma was a blind idiot, and went across the yard to pick up Ryouga's clothes that were now in a crumpled pile by the koi pond. Akane knelt down and looked closely at the clothes.
"Ryouga?"
Akane smiled when she saw a little black snout popping out of the top of the shirt. She picked the bundle up, piglet and all, and headed towards the kitchen.
A steaming kettle of water, yes a steaming kettle of water, funny how such a common occurrence could be such of such focus in a persons life. Oh, the thought of the nice and round golden goddess of the hot water. The sweet and indiscriminate goddess who gives all what they need, and yet the tingly sensation of the too hot water goes away within a few seconds, and it hardly takes away the joys of receiving such a gift as a hot kettle. There was only one down turn of the kettle goddess, she gives the gift you ask for, but she seems to have a sense of humor. Either that, or she doesn't care who you are and what situation you are in as long as you get what you want.
So Ryouga sat on the floor near his clothes watching Akane, grateful yet fearful, grateful that she was so nice to him, and dreading the embarrassment that this would cause. You see, not only does he turn human; he turns into a naked human.
Akane kept glancing at Ryouga. She wanted to make sure that he didn't lose himself. The world was hard enough to survive in as a human; she didn't even want to know what it would be like to live it as a piglet. Finally, it was warm enough to pour on Ryouga. Akane walked over to where Ryouga was patiently waiting. Both people closed their eyes as the water began to flow over the piglet's /soon-to-be Ryouga's head.
'God, it seems to be getting colder and colder out here. Where the hell is Ryouga? Gee, what a sight I must be. Ok, I'm just a random red-head girl at the moment. I am running down the street at three in the morning. Of course, I'm only wearing my regular boxers and undershirt, which happens to be white and rather see-through. Also, on top of that, there's also the fact that I happen to be a double-D cup size, and I have no bra on... yep I must be every dirty man's fantasy.' A shiver went down Ranma's spine. He is VERY self conscious about how he looked as a female. It just didn't make him comfortable having guys drooling all over him.
"Ryouga, where the hell are you?"
Ranma was still running, he was almost he was almost at Doctor Tofu's, He had been running up a down every street and alley way in the area. 'Oh well, I tried, he'll find me eventually.' With that Ranma turned around and started back towards the Tendo Dojo while half heartedly trying to find Ryouga.
Akane and the former pig, Ryouga, were sitting at the table sipping at tea. Except for the occasional sound of a sip, the room was deathly quiet. Akane kept glancing at the clock, and Ryouga found the grooves in the wood table awfully interesting. They sat in silence, and silence sat with them. So, in other words if it weren't for the occasional sip of tea, a person could be fooled into believing everyone was in bed and getting a decent night's sleep, leaving people to wonder why the lights were on in that room down stairs. The silence was so thick, it could be cut with a steak knife, or the Russian Rusty Red Hot Spork of Doom. The silence was so heavy that little ants were crushed by the weight of it.
'Thank god I'm home! I'm freezing! That's it I'm taking a shower and going to bed'
Ranma walked into the doorway, wiped his feet on the welcome mat, and walked silently towards the stares. On the way to the stairs, though, Ranma saw a light in the family room, and decided to look and see who exactly was up. He opened the door and. "Ryouga!"
Ryouga, surprised, Jumped from the table and landed in a defensive. Seeing that it was Ranma, Ryouga acted on conditioned reflex.
"Prepare to Die!"
Ryouga lunged towards Ranma, but never got there. He never even saw it coming. All of a sudden, I mean in mere milliseconds. Ryouga was pinned against the wall by several bladed objects, and he felt a razor sharp metallic object placed on his jugular. He couldn't have swallowed if he tried. The only thing he could do was to stare into Akane's chestnut eyes.
"Listen, Ryouga keep your voice down or I'll rip out your voice box. There are people trying to sleep in this house and it would be appreciated if you wouldn't disturb them."
With that Akane turned her back on Ryouga, and the weapons that had previously pinned Ryouga suddenly seemed to disappear. Ryouga stood stalk still, too shocked to move. Akane moved towards the door, she half opened the door and took a step to walk outside before turning her head to speak to Ranma.
"You must be freezing! Might I suggest you both take a shower before retiring for the night."
With that Akane seemed to disappear, her shadow may have stayed only just slightly longer than body did.
Seconds later Akane was in bed once again. 'Geez. Boys, they have no respect for those around them, making noises at all hours of the night. Males are so frustrating sometimes. I wonder where Ryouga is going to sleep tonight?'
Akane decided that she didn't want to be waken up with the problem, so she took a little pillow off the bed and placed it on the corner of the desk. She had a hunch that Ryouga was going to be in pig form when he was looking for a bed. She promptly fell asleep, too exhausted to care how things would turn out.
Downstairs..
Both males blinked at the vacant spot where Akane had just been. Ranma snapped out of the trance like state they had been in first, and took action. He took Ryouga by the collar and forcefully dragged him to the bathroom.
When they had both stripped naked, Ranma dragged Ryouga into the furo by the back of his bandana, he wasn't too gentle and sent Ryouga flying towards the tub, which had been filled, but was now cooled down to the temperature of the air outside. In other words, the water was cold.
"Squee!"
Ryouga let out a single squee as he struggled not to drown in the tub, pigs aren't exactly buoyant, but Ryouga didn't want his voice box removed from his body. Just enough noise to knock Ranma out of his stupor of finding his friend suddenly transformed. Ranma reached into the tub, picked Ryouga up by his bandana and hoisted him up so that they were eye level.
Time almost stopped for Ryouga, he was mortified. What was his biggest enemy going to say about his curse? How much would Ranma poke fun at him? What would be his first words be? Why did he have to find out? Ryouga's thought processes were running time and a half, while his body decided it would be fun to stop breathing.
Ranma was surprised when his friend had transformed. Now, he was picking him up from the tub. 'Hell, yep, hell' Ranma's only thought processes on the relatively short haul of Ryouga from tub to eye level.
Ranma looked directly into Ryouga's eyes with all the sympathy and compassion he could muster, and took in a deep breath.
"Look man, I'm sorry about your curse. Believe me, I understand what you're going through. I'm serious, I'm truly sorry about it."
The words of apology/sympathy were foreign on Ranma's tongue and in order to convince himself that he had even said it the first time, he apologized twice.
Ryouga had glared into Ranma's face while he was saying it. He was deeply searching for any sign of Ranma lying, but all his face showed was honesty. Sure, the words he was saying didn't match what he usually said, but he was deeply sincere about what he said. It seemed to satisfy Ryouga, somewhat.
Soon, they were both sitting in the bath tub male and human, human and male. Both men in deep thought.
"So."
Ranma wanted to break the oppressive silence.
"What happened?"
"Well, after a certain coward in the room that shall remain nameless, skipped out on our fight. I was forced to follow him to China."
"Ryouga, I waited for you on the lot behind your house for three days." Ryouga ignored the comment.
"I searched for the coward for weeks, and then one day I was standing on a cliff looking down at a strange place that was misty with a lot of little pools with bamboo poles sticking out. And then a panda came running up from behind me and ran into me. I was regaining my balance when a girl with red hair and a pig tail kicked me into the valley below. If it weren't for the girl I wouldn't have been cursed!"
"Umm. you blamed ME for seeing hell, shouldn't you be directing your anger towards that girl and her panda. wait a minute.. a girl and a.."
Just then Genma had the sudden urge to take a bath. We will never be sure why, but many will presume it was just the fact that Genma took pride in doing everything possible opportunity to screw Ranma out of happiness and complicating situations. He saw Ranma and Ryouga and decided to wait until the morning, and left.
Ryouga was shocked to see that the Tendos had a pet panda, then it clicked.
"A panda.. And a girl. Die!"
Ryouga lunged towards Ranma who was already getting out of the tub. Ranma quickly squirted Ryouga with could water from the faucet.
"Listen Ryouga, I don't want to piss off Akane, and I don't particularly want to lose my voice box. So stop this!"
Ryouga was livid, but the Akane incident was still at the top of his head. So he decided that the vengeance of heaven is slow but sure, and that he could wait until the morning to deliver a quick yet painful death to Ranma.
Ranma decided he had enough bathing for one night, and got dressed. He almost, not quite forgot to grab Ryouga. Both of them crept quietly up the stairs, so painstakingly quite that Ranma didn't even voice his pain when he stubbed his toe on the top stair. Ranma bit his lip while Ryouga looked smug.
The door slid with a slight creaky noise, it normally wouldn't have been loud enough for the two martial artists to even take notice of, but now it made both of them flinch. Ranma opened his mouth to speak, then he thought better of it. He decided that not waking Akane would be a good option. Ranma was creeping towards the bed, stopping once or twice to step around imaginary stepping stones. Total stealth mode. Ranma was about to nudge Akane and ask her what the hell he was supposed to do about Ryouga, when the moonlight highlighting the cushion pillow on the desk. Ranma discarded Ryouga onto the cushion pillow similar to how a little child puts away a toy at the end of the day: none too gently. He quickly climbed into bed with Akane, and was asleep before his head hit the pillow. Leaving an indignant pig glaring at him until the glaring pig gave up and settled down for sleep.
Ryouga lay on his cushion thinking, no matter how angry he had been at Ranma, he couldn't seem to find any at the moment. His mind kept wandering to less important and less violent thoughts about Ranma. Mostly, though, he pondered the relationship of the two people in the bed. One side effect of his curse, you see, was a sharper sense of smell. Ryouga could smell ki. When people touch each other, a ki signature is left on the persons body for a temporary amount of time, so he could smell if a person had recently been touched, hugged, kissed, and/or had **cough**.
Okay, so smell may not be the best word for it. Ryouga didn't really "smell" per say, just like Ranma couldn't "see" Akane doing her ki manipulation. It is impossible to see, hear, touch, or smell. People only perceive that they are. Ki is the energy your body has in order to do daily tasks like walking or peeing. Energy is neither created nor destroyed only transferred into other mediums. So, then, how do people get away with describing ki? They explain ki by using senses that people normally possess like sight, touch, smell, taste, and hearing. Everybody, at some point in their life could have sworn that animals have some magical ability to make people feel better. How do they know? They don't, but they can (at least in theory) sense disturbances in people's ki. That's why a trained dog can warn people if they are going to have a seizure, and why people live longer if they have a pet. When I say Ryouga "smelt" I mean like someone says they can taste the smell of ever green or taste the scent of chocolate, or smell the rain or snow. Those words don't exactly fit, but the general population nods their head and knows exactly what they're talking about. Pigs may have keen eyesight, but Ryouga could have sworn he could smell the ki fields of those around him. In fact, though it was Ryouga's seventh sense telling him to interpret what he was feeling as a smell. Ryouga tried not to smell these two people, but curiosity kills the little black piglet, and what he smelled didn't match what he knew was going on in the bed.
'Now that's odd. Their ki is very similar, VERY similar, it's hard to smell the difference. There's one thing though, their ki's are TOTALLY separate. I mean usually people who are just friends, they at least smell like they've touched each other. It smells like this is the first time they had ever met was tonight and this was the first time that he had ever been in her bed. I KNOW better because I heard how Akane shoved Ranma out of the bed. I wonder what their relationship is? I mean he IS sleeping with her. They're too old to be sharing a bed and just be friends. They haven't kissed, hugged, or done anything intimate so they probably aren't married. Maybe she's his girlfriend? But wouldn't they have kissed, or at least held hands? I wish I could ask Ranma, now it's going to bother me all night. Look at him, he seems to have gotten on nicely with his life even after he got cursed. Maybe I should try that. I should give this all up and get a girlfriend and settle down.' Ryouga seriously debated calling it quits, then he shook his little piggy head 'That little bastard, he has such a perfect life: a home a family and a cute girlfriend. He DESERVES some grief in his life, and I'm going to give it to him. Maybe I can try to settle down while still trying to get revenge, just not tell anybody. It's about time I had a place I could call home, and it's about time I get to know somebody I can call a friend.' Yes you heard that right, you didn't read it wrong. Ryouga decided that Ranma and him were friends, and because they were friends it was his job to cause Ranma grief for his past actions. He's a sort of Jiminy Cricket of the modern age. Ryouga drifted from one thought to the next until he finally fell asleep.
End Chapter
IAN (Interactive author's notes)
Get a sheet of paper a write down: an -ing verb verb adjective action verb adjective
Now read and fill in the blanks with the appropriate words
Ranma and Akane were -ing verb on the couch, when Ukyou suddenly verb in the room. Ukyou looked really adjective and had a strange look on her face. Ranma asked Ukyou what was the matter. Ukyou action verb from the room in tears, leaving a very adjective Ranma and Akane behind.
THAT was a REALLY BAD reenactment of an ad-lib. You know, the funny little pamphlets you used to pick up at the dollar store. It's supposed to be funny how the wrong word fits so perfectly in the blank. I think someone should do a REAL ad-lib fanfiction. I would read it and get a few kicks out of it. I'm surprised nobody has done this REALLY easy fanfic idea yet.
I remember why I was avoiding descriptions: descriptions are the devil. I once read a fanfic, it was REALLY good, except the author was ranting about a yellow dress for a chapter and a half, and two chapters later the SAME dress was blue. Let's just say that anything that doesn't make sense, or doesn't add up is made either with or without my knowledge, and it would be appreciated if it would be pointed out. Sometimes, it was just because when I was reading it over, it wasn't a spelling or grammer mistake. Sometimes it is just something I haven't explained yet. Author's do that to people so that when they read more of the story they go "OOOHHHH NOW I GET IT!!!". It could just be that the detail was so insignificant that this author didn't care, or it made sense to her because it's been in her head, and reads it differently from the reader. In any case let me know. I'll do more details, or at least try.
I'm sorry for the shortness of this chapter, hopefully I'll get Kodachi over with next chapter.
Note To self: never EVER incorporate anything like REAL physics to anime EVER again. After I posted it, it was brought to my attention that I had forgotten to consult my Physics book. So I consulted my Physics book, and I rewrote the bandana part. The only problem now is applying it to the real world. Okay, so I have a little too much time on my hands. I ACTUALLY tried it to make sure that I had actually got it right. Try this at home at some point please: 1) find a bandana/piece of cloth, and fold it so that it has three corners 2) try and spin the cloth 3) find out that the cloth doesn't spin well or fast enough to be conclusive 4) Tie identical knots on either end of where you folded the bandana. 5) try spinning the cloth by holding it on the knot and then throw it 6) hold the bandana so that the knot is hanging out of the bottom of your hand (you should be grasping the middle of the cloth) spin and toss the bandana 7) fold the bandana again so that both of the knots are being spun and fling it.
I found that no matter how I threw it, it didn't really spin after I let go of the cloth. Sure it went farther than I thought it would, but it didn't spin. ::shrugs:: technically it wasn't even the stupid bandanas that cut off Akane's hair, but Ryouga's belt, but this is an AU so I'm allowed to have discrepancies here and there. Please let me know if you ACTUALLY tried it and got different results, I'm curious.
Questions? Comments? Concerns? DEBATES? It's called reviewing/email/Aim/ICQ
