Dragon Tamer: Yay! My first SSBM fic! But it's not Super Smash Bros. Melee, it's Super Smash Bros. Misadventures, stupid random situations I decide to but the SSBM characters in. Sounds like fun, right? Right?
In this Installment: Zelda tries to get Ness to take a bath, Mr. Game & Watch tries to get his taco back from Pichu, Bowser seeks psychiatrical help, and Roy had a… bright red scooter? … It's a cornucopia of disturbing concepts.
Disclaimers: Me doesn't own SSBM, characters, maps, or anything portraying to SSBM, 'cept Roy's scooter and Mr. Game & Watch's taco.
Chapter 1: "You need a bath!"
"Boo ya! In your faces!" Ness shouted, just getting back from a team battle.
"Beep Beep Beeeeeeeep!" Mr. Game & Watch gloated behind him. The two had just defeated Mewtwo and Bowser, who followed behind.
"It was so… wrong…" Bowser said, who was deeply disturbed beyond all reason; he was the first to get K.O'd. "It was horrible… First there was the thunder, then all the hundreds of Mr. Saturns, and then the sausages… so many… sausages…" Mewtwo patted him on the back as Bowser started to cry.
"Hey Mr. Game & Watch, you know what this means?" Ness said.
"Beep?" Mr. Game & Watch beeped.
"Well, aside from getting that taco Pichu stole from you, this means we're an unstoppable duo!" Ness shouted in excitement.
"Beep Beeeeeep!" Mr. Game & Watch cheered as well, but it was probably about the taco.
"SAUSAGES!" Bowser shouted and went back to his crying, "I want my rubber duckie…" Mewtwo stopped and stared at him oddly.
"Right…" Ness said. "Anyway, you know what I smell? It's the stench of—"
"A smelly little boy named Ness, that's what I smell!" Ness turned around to see Zelda with a home-run bat in her hand, she had obviously just came from the home-run contest.
"Beep beep beep beep!" Mr. Game & Watch shouted in fear, then ran behind Ness.
"Dude, why are you afraid of Zelda?" Ness asked his cowering friend.
"Beep Beep… BEEP!" Mr. Game & Watch said and pointed. Ness looked to see standing behind Zelda was Marth.
"What, after all this time and the little guy's still afraid of me? I only beat him once, and it was a training match." Marth explained.
"It's a cornucopia of disturbing concepts." Roy said, riding by on a shiny red scooter.
"Yah… anyway, Ness you need a bath!" Zelda shouted.
"What! No I don't" Ness yelled back.
"Oh yes, you do!" Zelda countered. "And I'm going to make sure you do!" Ness was quite for a moment.
"Zelda, I'm ashamed… I didn't think you were that kind of woman." Ness said. Mr. Game & Watch was slightly shocked at what he said, Bowser was too busy sulking to notice, Mewtwo just stared at him oddly, and Marth started cracking up.
"Ness! H-How could you say something like that!" Zelda shouted blushing as well. "I mean, how old are you? 6… 7…"
"12, but that's besides the point…" Ness said. Zelda just stared at him.
"It's a cornucopia of disturbing concepts." Roy said, riding by on his scooter. Mr. Game & Watch, Marth, and Mewtwo watched he pass by, but Ness, Zelda, and Bowser just ignored him.
"I don't need a bath!" Ness shouted.
"Yes, you do!" Zelda shouted back.
"No, I don't!"
"Yes, you do!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"NO!"
"YES!"
"NO!"
"YES!"
"NO!"
"YES!"
"Pichu!" Ness and Zelda stopped their arguing to see Pichu carrying a taco. "Pichu pichu!" It said happily.
"Beep Beeeeeeeeeep!" Mr. Game & Watch said, sounding angry at Pichu.
"Pichu!" Pichu froze when it saw the angry Mr. Game & Watch.
"Beeeeeeeep Beeeeeeeep!" Mr. Game & Watch shouted. Steam came out of his head.
"Pi pichu!" Pichu shouted back. Then, it put part of the taco in his mouth and ran off.
"Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep!" Mr. Game & Watch yelled then gave chase. Everyone, except for Bowser, stared as the two ran off.
"What was that all about?" Marth asked, confused.
"Oh, Pichu stole Mr. Game & Watch's taco and he wants it back." Ness explained.
"O.K.…" Marth said.
"It's a cornucopia of disturbing concepts." Roy said, again, riding on his scooter.
"I swear," Mewtwo said, using his psychic powers to speak, "If he does that one more time, I'm going to hurt him."
"It was horrible!" Bowser shouted out of nowhere, "I'll be mentally disturbed for the rest of my life! I need therapy! I NEED A HUG!" Then turned around and gave Mewtwo a big bear hug.
"Help… can't breathe!" Mewtwo barely said since Bowser was squeezing the life out off him, which is also kind of irrelevant because he was using psychic powers to talk.
"It's a cornucopia of—AHHHH!" Roy said riding on his scooter, but was stopped when Mewtwo stuck his tail out in front of him and caused him to crash.
"This is just too weird…" Ness sighed.
"You're still getting a bath!" Zelda said.
"Oh yeah!" Ness yelled, "You gotta catch me first, Princess Pain in the Triforce!" Then Ness ran off.
"Grrrr, Ness you get back here!" shouted Zelda then chased after him.
"… This is going to be a very disturbing day…" Marth said.
"I'm O.K." Roy's voice called from the rubble over top of him and his scooter. Soon a giant rock plummeted on top of him. "Ow…" Then Marth looked over to see Bowser still squeezing Mewtwo, now holding a sign that says, "Help me!"
"Very disturbing…" he sighed once more.
End Chappy 1
Dragon Tamer: … Wow, that was pointless… Wonder what's going to happen next… O.O; Ack! What am I saying! True be told, I really don't know… I found this much in a notebook from my freshman year. (I'm officially a junior now -) Well, I'll think of something… Please R&R and wait for Chappy 2! (Expect a looong wait, I'm lazy…)
Author's Notes
There's a funny story behind the Pichu and taco thing. I was playing SSBM and talking to my friend Valor on the phone. I was playing as the Ice Climbers (of course, they're my favorite characters -) and fighting against Peach and Falco in All-Star mode. I told him that and he said, "Pichu and a taco?" Stupid static, I wish it would die TT… Anyway the idea just came back when I thought of this.
Um, Ness is 12, right… Oo; cause that's what my friend told me… If I'm wrong, please don't hurt me, Earthbound fans out there.
"It's a cornucopia of disturbing concepts." That's something I said one day and then I was like, "Dude, I so have to use this in a story!" It's one of my weird saying, up there with, "Nothing solves life's miseries like a Pop-Tart.", and "Kids, don't use Formula 1 race cars to chase hedgehogs.", which I technically got from the Sonic X anime, but… SHHH!
