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……..

The Cat was flitting around blue midget, searching for some mousse to tame his tangling hair. Unfortunately, he had no such luck. The only things he did find were a disgusting pair of yellowing socks – no doubt they were Lister's, and an empty bottle of barbeque sauce.

…..

Lister heaved a lungful of air. It was so clean. So refreshing. Nothing about this planet seemed to be wrong at all. Holly must have got her facts wrong again. It wouldn't be the first time either.

Blue midget had landed in a great big pink field. There's no need to say that it definitely looked out of place. But, I did anyway.

"Okay," said Lister rubbing his hands together, "we need to fix that engine."

Rimmer sighed, "And how do you propose we do that? We have no tools, no supplies, and no idea where red dwarf is – face it Listy we're doomed."

"We'll be fine Rimmer, I mean look how beautiful this place is! How can anything bad happen in a place like this? It's just too pretty."

Rimmer frowned, "pretty?"

"Yeah…" Lister's eyes had gone dreamy, "look at it… it's so lovely and pink."

The words seemed very very wrong coming from his mouth. "Pink? Lister are you feeling okay?"

Lister was no longer listening. The sheer beauty of the place seemed to have imbedded itself into his soul. Beautiful. Beautiful.

"It's… beautiful!" he sighed.

Lister began to walk slowly and steadily out of the field. Rimmer followed him.

"Lister – stop! What are you doing, we're trying to get out of here! You'll just get lost-"

"Beautiful," said Lister again. He didn't slow his pace. He was heading for something.

…..

Kryten opened his eyes. Ah, the skutters had done a fine job! Now if he could just get his head the right way around…

Cat stuck his head through the door, "Bud? They said they'd be back ten minutes ago - I need my hair mousse!"

Kryten screwed his head on with a pop. "What do you mean sir?"

"I mean alphabet head and chipmunk cheeks!"

"I don't think I understand. Where did they go?"

Cat rolled his eyes, jeesh, was this guy slow on the uptake. "They went out there, to fix the ship, so we could get off this damn planet, and I could get changed!"

"Oh." said Kryten, and then shouted: "You let a human and a hologram go out on a dangerous planet that we don't even know the name of?"

"No," said Cat, "I let them go out on a dangerous planet called pinkfluff!"

Kryten almost blew his top, "PINKFLUFF?"

……

Meanwhile back on the dangerous planet of pinkfluff…

Rimmer ran, trying to keep up with the space bum, but failing miserably.

"Lister slow down!"

But he didn't. He kept on walking. He could see the creatures now. All pink and fluffy and cuddly. He just wanted to give them a hug. Just a little one. A hug. Hug.

Rimmer panted after him, "Lister you SMEGGING GIT!"

Lister gazed at them, and reached out with his fingertips to touch one.

Instead of the fluffy softness he expected there was something else. Something he didn't much like at all. Something extremely painful jolted up his arm.

……

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