Jacob Mandeson was sitting in an old chair near the cold fireplace of the wooden cabin. The darkness surrounding him was thicker than usual but to him it was second nature. He loved it but it hasn't always been like this. He remembered a time, although vaguely, when he loved the sunshine and the bright lights; a time when he adored watching the happiness around him; but all that belonged to the past. He couldn't remember anymore the reason for his change or the exact time of his 'becoming' as he called it. Years ago, he had let himself sink deep into the darkness, deep into the abyss. He had let his mind get swept off from the madness that was rotting him bit by bit. He had learned to love his demons, embrace them completely. Now sitting in the darkness, looking at the ashes resting in the fireplace, he felt contentment; a weird, twisted satisfaction. He was happy for he was near the end of his journey, near his completion. All the years locked up in the asylum had not managed to break his mind. The system had failed to reform him and he had succeeded in fooling the system.
He woke up from his thoughts. There was no sound in the house except his own breathing. Jason, Henry and Anderson had gone out to perform a task, one final task and he was left alone in the cabin to watch after the kid.
The kid! That is how he liked to call him, for in his eyes, Rey looked like a child, like a teenager, unchanging despite his age. And that only angered him more every time he thought of his son. He had to admit that seeing his own son after all those years was kind of exhilarating and binding at the same time. He felt proud for having created such a man; so proud that he knew he had to have him for his own.
The plan had started to form in his mind the very first second he had laid his eyes upon him. The presence however of Rey was not something he had foreseen or calculated. Jacob loved the challenge. Rey added more to the beauty of his son. For the old man, Rey was like a trophy, a valuable object Adam possessed, like a diamond. He just had to have it too. Now that he had Rey under his possession he could easily understand what he saw in the Mexican. He was so beautiful, so fragile and delicate that it felt almost like a sin just watching him.
Jacob had seen Rey for the first time in the hotel reception the night he and Adam had arrived after that Smackdown house show. He had been secretly following Adam for some time now, but seeing him with Rey was a new revelation. He had taken his breath away. He looked so sad and so frail; his eyes were shining but his face was full of distress. Jacob understood why Adam had eyes only for the little creature and it was that night that he decided to call the others and put the new plan in motion.
Tonight, quite a few days later, he had Rey for himself. And he was happy. The beautiful creature was in the back room, locked like a rare animal, to be admired and worshiped only by him and the ones he chose to give him to. He didn't plan on having him so long around, he was going to be the bait and then he would get rid of him, like he had done with so many others in the past. But now that he had him, he really didn't want to part with him. The longer he looked at him, the longer he touched him, the more he consumed him passionately. Rey was going to be the means to obtaining his son, but he was planning on keeping him for a while. Maybe he would prove to be a fine way of entertainment. He had taken a small taste of this creature a couple of times, and how much he had loved it! The mere thought of his muscular body writhing in pain, the sense of control over Rey, the curves of his body, his skin, his voice, his eyes… they sent him over the top. His body tensed up. He licked his dry lips and swept a drop of sweat from his forehead.
He got up from his chair, feeling his dick strain against his pants. Maybe a little visit to the creature wouldn't be such a bad idea. Not a bad idea at all.
When Rey came to his senses, he was still naked, lying on his right side down on the hard mattress facing the wall. He managed to open his left eye only a little bit, as far as the swelling would permit it. His right eye was completely swollen shut and his nose was broken, still bleeding. He tried to move but the pain stopped him. His right shoulder was out of its socket, and the lacerations on his body were still haemorrhaging painfully, preventing him from breathing normally. A rasp moan came from his throat as a bad cough surfaced. He coughed out the blood from his throat and brought his left hand up to cover his chest. He didn't have to have his eyes open to see. He knew his health was getting worse. The unbearable pain in his chest and the coughed out blood were proof that his pneumonic disease was still 'alive' inside, growing again.
He tried to take his mind off the pain and concentrate on something else. He stretched his ears to hear any sound that might indicate his whereabouts, but nothing was heard. The voices and the footsteps outside the room had stopped.
He had no idea how long he had stayed like this; he had lost the track of time. The coughs continued to hit in waves, filling his mouth with blood and the burning in his lungs grew stronger, like boiling water. Rey was sweating and shivering at the same time, the fever rising steadily.
Suddenly, the door opened and Jacob entered still wearing the same impeccable priest black outfit. Rey turned his gaze to see him. He found that the old man looked different. His movements didn't flow like before. They weren't slow and calculated. They were fast, erratic almost spasmodic, like he wasn't in control of himself any more. His eyes were staring at him differently too. He didn't have the creepy fatherly look he had the past couple of times. His eyes were wide open, perversely examining Rey inch by inch, taking pleasure from his battered body and the sticky blood.
Jacob took a few quick strides towards the bed. He was breathing faster, his heart pounding quicker from the excitement. He was not the same man Rey had seen before. He had become something else. His face was twisted, flushed and he could tell he was horny as hell. Jacob grasped Rey's neck and squeezing it tightly punched him with his free hand. Rey let out a gurgling sound and fell back on the mattress heavily spitting more blood. He didn't have the time to realize what had happened when Jacob grabbed him again from his neck and flipped him over to his stomach.
Rey's mind barely registered the sound of a zipper opening. Jacob was holding him down with his hand still gripping his neck. His right shoulder being dislocated made his right arm useless. He had only his left hand to fight, but it didn't help him much because Jacob had grabbed it with his other hand and twisted it backwards. He tried to wiggle out of his hold but it was useless. At this point Jacob had him under his control and at his mercy.
"Please, no" Rey begged.
Jacob laughed loudly, his voice echoing in the walls.
"Please, yes" he mocked back. He used his foot to splay Rey's legs out.
Rey felt Jacob's weight falling over him. He smelled the old man's breath near his face whispering to him.
"I do understand what he sees in you. You are very beautiful. Oh yes. And you are all mine. All mine."
He licked Rey's lips and the blood on his cheeks with his wet, long tongue letting his saliva fall on Rey's face. He let his arm free, but it was too numb for Rey to use any more. Jacob trailed his fingers lower to Rey's back and stuck two inside a bleeding wound knocking the wind out him.
"No, please don't do this" he gasped.
Jacob took his fingers out of the wound. They were covered in blood. He marvelled at them as the blood dripped down to his palm. He bent over and whispered once again.
"He will come for you. If he loves you, he will come soon. I just want you to be ready when your love comes to rescue you. I want him to suffer like I did. It is through our suffering that we will unite. I will become one with my son. And you are the way to do it. Your suffering will set us free" he finished ecstatically
And he lowered his blood dripping fingers to Rey's ass. He thrust them inside and forced them deeper and deeper.
Rey stiffened. He wanted to scream but he didn't want to give the pervert the satisfaction he seemed to get every time Rey cried out. He clenched his jaw shut trying to keep the pain away. Despite his swelled eyes, he knew it was his own blood on the fingers fucking him without pity, and that made him want to gag. He could hear the old man above him panting from the desire as he pushed another finger inside sending a new wave of pain up his spine.
After a while, an eternity it seemed to Rey, he pulled out his fingers and licked them blissfully, loving their taste. He grabbed Rey's dislocated shoulder and yanked it hard.
And he screamed. He couldn't take it any more… he screamed. And Jacob was there to take the pleasure from hearing him suffer. He felt his dick straining against his belly. He was so close now. Finally he would have it all! He started laughing loudly.
And then it was in. His dick was inside Rey, pounding him hard, painfully. Rey wanted to cry out, but a strong hand grabbed his neck cutting off the air, but not completely, just enough to make him hurt more.
"You… are… mine… forever… mine…"
Jacob kept fucking Rey fast like an animal, grunting and drooling, squeezing his neck hard, pulling it backwards, bending Rey's body.
"You… will… learn… to… love this… yes… you are such… such a good fuck… oh yeah…"
Rey was gasping desperately for air, but each time either Jacob squeezed his neck tighter or fucked him harder. He felt tears sting his eyes as the old man kept fucking his ass, tearing him in half.
"You like… my dick… in your ass… don't you? You feel… so nice… so tight… yeah…"
He was fucking him faster and faster, his whole dick inside his ass, bleeding him. His hand let his neck go and Rey immediately gasped for air and then screamed. Jacob however had other plans. Hurting him was not enough. He wanted to hear Rey's sweet voice beg. While he continued to fuck him, he grabbed Rey's balls and gripped them in his fist.
"I love… your screams… scream… more for me…" and squeezed more.
Rey's mind reached the point of no return. Pain was all he knew and it was everywhere. It was in his mind and it consumed his entire body. He felt like everything was stripped from him. There was nothing left inside. Everything was rotten and putrid, and only the pain was the constant reminder that he was sadly very much alive. He felt relieved to sense his consciousness abandoning him one more time, his body going numb just from the huge amount of hurt.
Jacob let his balls free.
"Beg…" he mumbled, feeling almost ready to cum inside Rey. "Beg for more…"
Rey said nothing. He was already half unconscious. Jacob slapped him hard waking him up just enough.
"I said… beg… for more…"
Rey would do anything to stop him, anything to end this nightmare. He opened his mouth and uttered tearfully between his panting.
"Please…fuck… me… more…"
Jacob smiled and grabbed Rey's waist puling him to the edge of the bed, putting knees on the floor angling his body so he could fuck him better, harder and deeper. He knelt down and thrust his dick covered in Rey's blood back inside his bleeding ass. Rey screamed again.
"Tell me… tell me… you love me…"
Rey was crying. He could barely hear the old man's words amongst his screams and his tears.
"I… love… you…"
Jacob's face twisted with an evil mask of satisfaction. How he loved to hear those sweet words out of Rey's mouth, how much that aroused him! His dick twitched in excitement and he let out another animalistic groan.
Rey was weeping, the tears running freely from his swollen eyes, hurting them. His broken body was aching from this raw torture. He had no strength left in him to scream, no will left to fight. A pure form of pain had conquered him shadowing everything in his mind, sweeping clean his every thought. All he sensed was the old man raping him, his dick covered in his blood tearing him in half, his old wrinkled but strong hands grasping his flesh, his low deep voice grunting in pleasure.
"Say… I love you…" he ordered again. "Say… I love you… daddy" then added.
Rey felt disgust, more dirty as the old man kept fucking him, moaning and hissing.
"Say it" he commanded and grabbed Rey again from his neck. Rey had clenched the mattress firmly with his fist. He started crying again. A fist connected with the side of his face, cutting his swollen eye open.
"I love you… daddy…"
"Again" as his movements grew faster and more violent. He was fucking him so hard Rey's body was cornered between Jacob's and the edge of the bed and the bed was rustling against the wall. Rey felt his senses abandon him and his body go limb.
"I love you… daddy…" he repeated although right now it sounded like his own voice was coming from a distant place.
Jacob's body stiffened for a second and let out a cry, like a wild dog howling. He screamed in pleasure as his dick twitched reaching climax. He came hard, letting his hot cum spill inside Rey. He thrust his dick forward a couple more times, each time howling and screaming from the excitement. He lay upon Rey's limb body, panting, trying to catch his breath.
He hadn't felt that good in a long time!
This beautiful creature was indeed good. He had managed to wake up inside him forgotten feelings of perversion, hate and pain. He felt happy and complete having fucked this creature like a dog!
It was perfect… almost… There was still one thing missing and that he would have real soon. He tucked his dick back in his pants and got up on his feet. Rey felt like his insides were pulled out. He wanted to throw up and again he wished he was unconscious… or even dead. The small vision he had left from his left eye was beginning to blur. There was blood dripping from his ear, from the side of his head and his half opened mouth was the only way he had left to breathe. He was surprised to realise how much happiness this approaching oblivion was bringing him. Until he heard the old man speak again from the door.
"I hope my son enjoyed fucking you as much as I did. Adam will be with us very soon."
Rey passed out immediately after those words. He didn't have the time to react as darkness came upon him, leaving his naked broken body half on the bed and half on the cold dirty floor, his head resting on the bed, his right arm hanging limp and his left fist still clinging firmly the mattress.
And the blood kept coming down his face, like tears.
Somewhere Angels were weeping and Satan was laughing.
Adam stepped out from the taxi to the pouring rain. He took a few hasty steps towards the street to his hotel He wanted to get out of this blasted rain and change into something warm and dry. His mind was filled with different thoughts, but the most important thing he could think of doing right now was calling Eddie and tell him about the new development. It was dusk, but the thick grey clouds covering the city sky, made it look like it was already night time. He crossed the wet street, making his way among the traffic jammed cars. He was soaking wet when he reached the other side and was about to enter the hotel when he felt a hand grabbing his coat and pulling it down in order to draw his attention. He turned to look and his eyes fell on a small black boy standing in the rain, staring at him eagerly.
"Sir" the little boy said. He was no more than ten years old.
Adam stared back in surprise not knowing what to do.
"Do you have any money?' the boy asked.
Adam searched his pockets and took out some money. He didn't count them but he handed them to the boy none the less. Numbly he turned to leave when he heard the kid speak again.
"Oscar is alive."
Adam stopped dead on his tracks, not really believing what he had heard. Maybe the rain had played a sick game against him, making him hear what he desired to listen. He turned to face the black boy once more. Sure enough, he was still standing in the middle of the rain, staring up at him with his big black innocent eyes.
"What did you say?"
"I said Oscar is alive. If you want to see him, go behind the Plaza theatre within the next ten minutes."
And then the boy left running before Adam had the time to stop him and question him further. His body was numb, but he had no idea if it was from the rain or the weird message. The boy must have been paid from Rey's kidnappers to deliver the message. That much he could figure on his own. He looked at his watch. It was seven and thirty six minutes. His mind went blank as his feet came to life. He entered the hotel and asked the receptionist where this Plaza theatre was. She looked at him strangely, and smiling delightfully, she informed him that it was up the hotel's avenue, and to the right.
Adam didn't stick around any longer. He bolted right outside into the rain and took out his phone dialling detective Scott's number. He turned right and started running fast, the phone ringing on the other side of the line.
"Come on… pick it up" he mumbled out of breath.
He ran fast amongst the people and their umbrellas, he crossed small streets and vertical avenues, his eyes searching frantically the sign of the Plaza theatre. He looked at this watch. It was seven forty five.
"Hello" Scott answered.
"Detective… it's Adam Copeland. Someone told me Rey is kept somewhere behind the Plaza theatre. I am going there right now…"
"NO! Mr Copeland. Don't go…" Scott answered but a thunder fell that exact moment preventing Adam from hearing him. "It is a setup!" he screamed but Adam did not listen.
"No…" he cursed himself ignoring the hasty looks the people passing by gave him but he didn't care. The minutes had passed. He had to run. With the corner of his eye, he saw the theatre's blue sign flashing brightly. He hung up the cell phone; he ran towards it and turned to the small side alley that lead him to the back of the Plaza. Once there, he stopped to catch his breath. He searched frantically around trying to distinguish someone there, unconsciously still clutching the phone in his palm.
"Rey" he called out but his voice was covered from a loud thunder. Almost immediately a lightning came and shed its light to the back alley proving the storm had reached its highest point. Adam had just the time to see two shadows behind him, but before he could turn, a piece of cloth covered his nose and a strange scent put him out to sleep within moments.
Detective Scott arrived half an hour later behind the theatre with four police officers. The rain was still going strong and the sky was completely black. Night time was upon him, like a burden on his shoulders, covering everything he needed to see. All traces and prints were washed away from the thick raindrops falling on the buildings and the pavements making a weird noise that wiped clean every other sound this damn city created. He stepped out of the police car holding is gun and a flashlight. But after a few pointless minutes, he realised there was no one there. He put his gun back in its holster and was getting ready to leave when he heard one of the police officers yell.
"Detective Scott. Look here!"
Scott ran towards the place where the policeman was pointing. It was something small and silver coloured. He bent down to look. It was a cell phone. He took it carefully and placed it in a plastic bag. Not that it mattered anyway after all this rain. All fingertips would be washed away, but he didn't want to take any chances. It was a miracle that it still worked. From outside the plastic bag he pushed a button and a phone number immediately flashed… his own!
This was Adam's phone.
He was right. He hated it when he was right.
He took out his own cell hone and called the chief.
"Chief" he said when the familiar voice answered, "They have taken him as well. We came too late."
He entered his car and drove away cursing all the way to the forensics lab.
Eddie was standing looking outside from his hotel window when a knock on the door startled him.
"Come in" he said.
The door opened and Kurt came in.
"Anything new?" he asked.
"No nothing. I am still waiting for Adam to call. He said he would call me when he would finish with the police and that was hours ago."
"Have you tried calling him?"
"Yes… a couple of times, but he didn't answer. I called the hotel too. The receptionist told me she saw him enter the lobby and immediately leave"
"To where?"
"She said he asked directions for a theatre"
"A theatre? What the hell for?"
Eddie shrugged.
"I am worried." He said finally.
Kurt sat on the bed sighing.
"People are asking questions Eddie… Vince knows too. He wants to bring the feds in this."
Eddie didn't answer. He kept looking outside. This was killing him. He could taste the metallic bitterness of sadness in his mouth as his swallowed hard, trying to keep his temper under control. He couldn't understand any of it, why… why? Oscar was like his brother… no… correction, Eddie felt that Oscar WAS his brother. After spending a lifetime together on the road, after growing up together, he felt so useless. Rey had always been there for him when Eddie needed him in his bad times… and those were many; he had been there, beside him, with a smile, with his big eyes shining brightly, giving him courage, strength… hope!
"I remember first meeting Rey," Eddie finally said, "he was outside of the arena throwing firecrackers, and I remember he had a smile on his face! He's just one of those people that you look at, and you just smile. In Spanish, he has what we call a lot of angel in him. He's got a great charisma. And that's what I love about Rey. I love being around him. Ever since I first met him, he's been like that. And whenever I'm down and out, I look forward to just seeing him, because seeing him is comforting. And it kills me knowing there is nothing I can do to help him"
He broke down in tears.
Night had already fallen.
Somewhere detective Scoot was driving to the lab.
A van was carrying the unconscious body of Adam to the ominous lair of the beast where the last act of this nightmare would unfold.
Eddie's tears ran freely down to his cheek, like the raindrops on the glass. Kurt hugged him, trying to comfort him… in vain.
'Where are you Adam' Kurt thought to himself and clenched his jaw tighter.
He woke up from the distant sound of rain drops falling on a window. He opened his eyes trying to focus but it was too dark and too blurry to make out anything. He could still feel his wet clothes clinging on his body and his long blond hair dripping from the cold rain. He rubbed his eyes and soon enough he found his eyesight getting better.
"Hello Adam"
A soft voice startled him. It came from a distance. Adam looked at its direction but it was still too dark to see who it was. He had a slight idea though and he cursed himself silently. How could he have been such an idiot! He had walked into their trap like an ignorant fool!
'Stupid! Fucking brilliant!' he cursed again.
The voice came closer to him this time. Adam sat up blinking, chasing away the last traces of the drug from his system. He looked at the figure standing at the feet of the… bed? He was surprised to find himself lying on a bed without any bonds. He asked himself the reason for this but the voice sounded again interrupting his thoughts before he could react to his new situation.
"I am sorry if the boys were a little rough on you but I'm afraid it was necessary. I don't think you would have come otherwise."
Adam could now see clearly Jacob's face. He looked like someone he knew…
Himself.
So this was his father.
'Pity' the word came to his mind immediately. Jacob looked seriously deranged. He came and sat next to Adam on the bed. His eyes were glowing brightly with something the Adam could not identify, with something Rey had already experienced. He raised his hand and caressed his son's face.
"I am happy you came home at last…my son."
Adam's face twisted with sorrow. He felt a nod forming in his throat. He swallowed hard.
"Father?" his voice came out hoarse. "Where is Rey?"
Jacob smiled. The use of the word father was the best thing he had heard so far in his life. It almost brought him to tears.
"Father…" he whispered just to hear the word again, make sure he had heard it from his own son's mouth. He brought his hand to Adam's mouth and let his fingers trace his lips. Adam tried real hard not to show his repulsion. In that instant something in his mind clicked and an idea started to form; a dangerous and risky plan but one that if played correctly, it could lead him to his love. He made his heart stone, and turning his face, he kissed his father's old fingers, surprising him. Before Jacob could react, Adam leaned forward and took him in his arms.
"Father… I am so happy I found you after all those years." He said hoping to have his father convinced. He squeezed the old man tightly in his arms, his disgust growing. If this was the way that lead to his heart, then he would gladly follow it no matter the cost.
No matter the price.
No matter.
"My son" Jacob whispered to Adam's ear.
'So far so good' Adam thought.
They stayed like this far a few more moments before Jacob broke the hug. He looked deeply into Adam's eyes and Adam tried to look as loving as possible despite the fact that his heart was telling him the exact opposite; how much he hated that man for making Rey suffer. He wanted to bring his own two hands and struggle him, take his last breath and scream to his face for causing them such pain. Instead he asked.
"Where were you all those years father?"
"I was… indisposed" he carefully chose his words. "It was not my choice, but I am hoping to make everything better; get to know you and hopefully make up for all those years I spent away from you. Please forgive me for contacting you this way but I was afraid you might reject me"
"It's OK. The important thing is that I found you"
Adam swallowed hard once again. It was a surreal nightmare coming to life. Growing up he had dreamed, even planned down to the last detail what he would say to his father if he ever met him, but this was far beyond his wildest imagination. He was trying to keep his head together and do what was best to get himself and most importantly Rey out of this devil's lair.
"Father? Why did you take Rey?" he dared to ask.
"I wanted to get to know a little about you before meeting you. I wanted to see what you love and why you love it. Your friend is quite extraordinary. He is so beautiful and so fragile. I can see why you love him so." He said caressing his hair. "Imagine my pleasure when I found out that we have the same taste."
Adam's mind screamed. His heart was racing and he couldn't believe what he was hearing. His own father? Was he saying what he thought he did?
"Taste?" he asked dryly.
"Yes. I needed to know you. So I took something that was yours, something that I know you value most, and tried it for myself… Oh, my son… I was so delighted when I saw this creature… and when I tasted him… I still could feel you on his flesh."
"Father…" Adam used this word deliberately "what did you do?" he asked hesitantly.
"Don't worry my son. Like you said, the important thing is that we found each other. We are finally together that is all that matters."
Adam's face twisted with sorrow. Jacob was surprised to see that. It was something he couldn't understand. He chuckled.
"No… don't tell me that you actually care for the little imp? People like him live only for the pleasure of men like US! My son… they exist only to satisfy our needs. Once they quench our thrist, they die. Like butterflies; as soon as you touch their wings, they cannot fly any more… they cannot exist any longer."
Adam was speechless. In the darkness of the space surrounding him, he felt like he was falling in the void. He felt tears in his eyes, but tried his best to keep them back. And he did. He swallowed them… and felt them salty on his throat. Jacob was looking him, his once loving eyes, now brutal and austerely looking back.
"No" Adam whispered and let his head fall.
"'No' what?" Jacob asked
It took a while for Adam to respond.
"No. I don't care for him. You are right my father… you are right" he spoke, lifting his eyes and starring intensely upon his deranged father.
Jacob smiled widely and squeezed his son's shoulder.
"You are a strong man… although not strong enough. You are holding on to hopeless things… needless things. But you will learn. Together we will start a new life. You will become a new man, stronger, tougher ruthless…a survivor."
He got up from the bed and started walking towards the room's door.
"And it will start now… tonight… come… come with me and take the first step."
Adam stood up awkwardly from the bed, his head still a little dizzy and took a few clumsy steps towards his father. They exited the room and walked down a small corridor. Adam saw an open window a few feet ahead. It was completely dark outside although he had no idea what the time was. He realised he wasn't wearing his watch. He brought his palms discretely to his pockets and searched. Nothing; they had taken his wallet and his cell phone as well.
Adam still couldn't figure out where the hell he was but judging from the style of the house, he should be somewhere far away from the city, probably north, lost in the vast American country, in the middle of a forest. He heard voices coming from a distance. They were male voices, speaking in low tones, but they were silenced once they heard footsteps approaching. Jacob opened a large wooden door to the living room of the house. There they were. Three guys, one of them, Adam recognised immediately.
One was a huge black man, almost 7 feet tall and about 450 pounds. Adam thought he looked disgustingly like the Big Show.
The second one was a thin man, about forty, with no hair and no teeth except a few rotten ones in front. He was smoking eagerly a cigarette, holding it with his yellow smoke painted bonny fingers.
The third one… that one Adam recognised immediately. It was the nurse from the hospital; tall, blond, well-built. His eyes were dark, shadowed from the dim light of the room. He was sitting in a corner, a beer in his hand and few empty bottles scattered at his feet.
"Guys, this is my son, Adam. Son, meet, Anderson, Henry and Jason" he said pointing at the black man, the old man and the nurse in successive order. "They helped you come back home. Their part is almost done here. They have one last thing to do for me and then they will get paid for their valuable services."
The three men didn't react to the old man's words. Perhaps they were used to him by now, or maybe the old man was giving them the creeps. If Adam guessed, it would be the latter. They were scared! And that worried him more because he still hadn't witnessed what he was capable of doing.
Adam didn't speak or nod. He just looked at them and they looked back. Jason was sitting next to a steal door, a door that was barred from the outside with bolts and a lock. The old man's voice woke him up.
"Jason, open the door. Adam is going in."
Adam was startled at this statement. He looked at his father in surprise but hurried to hide it. He could hear the loud pounding of his beating heart clearly in his ears. The sound of the door unlocking with a metallic hissing sound brought him back again to reality.
"Adam, go inside."
"What's inside?" he asked calmly although he could feel his palms sweating freely inside his pockets.
"The end of the old and the dawn of the new. Go inside and say goodbye to your old life."
The last creepy smile was the final clue Adam needed. He was certain that Rey was behind that door. His mind was racing, and he was trying in despair to come up with a plan in case his guess was correct. What he couldn't figure out was his father's behaviour. But he was quick enough to give up trying to understand the ravings of a mad man. Nothing made any sense any more. One thing he knew for sure was that he had to find Rey, the other half of his bleeding heart before it was too late.
The large door opened. Adam had no choice left. He took the first step towards the dark room ignoring the disapproving glances the three men were giving him. Once he came to the door, he was able to see a form lying on the floor at the far wall of the room. The not in his neck almost cut his breath. He prayed to God, this man wasn't who he thought it was.
'Please God.' He repeated in his mind over and over again. The ground under his feet was crisp from the old dust as he entered the room. He didn't turn to look his father; he didn't want to meet his eyes, his approving smile. He didn't need his blessing.
And then time stopped. It was like falling in the void. All sounds disappeared, the crisp ground, the whispers behind him… even the sound of his own heart seamed to have fallen in that same void. Adam was not surprised by his sudden deafness. He didn't care. He stood frozen in the middle of the dark room, unable to move his feet. It took every bit of his strength to stand, not to allow his legs fail him and drop on his knees. He was glad he had his back turned on the others. They never saw his jaw tremble or his eyes sting with tears. His palms became fists in his pockets and his sweat was gone, giving its place to a chilling iciness numbing his body. He didn't know what to do… and he prayed to God for forgiveness.
"Rey?" he asked dryly, realising he as thirsty.
No answer came. The form of Rey did not stir one inch. Somewhere between nightmares, Rey had slipped from the bed onto the filthy floor, his body bent awkwardly, still covered in bruises, cuts and…
'All this blood…'
"Rey?" he called out louder this time, but once more no answer came. Adam could not see his face. He reluctantly took another step closer. Then he saw his face. He let a whimper escape his lips and a tear run down his face. Rey's face wore a mask of torture. It was still swollen from the beatings, bloodied beyond any recognition. There were thin paths of clean skin tracing their way down to his cheeks cleaning the blood, and Adam knew that Rey had been crying. He wasn't sure when exactly his own body gave up. He couldn't stand any more. He knelt beside his love, crying silently. He extended his hand to touch him but he hesitated. Rey's body was all cut open, and he didn't want to cause any more pain. He came close to his face and whispered softly his name. He was trying to bring him back, call him out of the darkness he was put in. He brought his fingers gently on Rey's eyes and swept away all the blood and the tears. Then he heard his breath. It was short, strained and faint. Adam caressed Rey's short hair, feeling the sticky blood between his fingers.
"Oscar… please wake up. It's me… Adam. Please open your eyes…"
For a few minutes, there was no response from the limp form lying on the ground. Adam swallowed his silent salty tears as he kept caressing the Mexican's face from the blood. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what he could do in this place, with those insane people outside watching him, waiting for him to make one false move, one mistake. He knew for a fact that nothing would give those 'animals' more pleasure than to watch him suffer. And he could only guess what they had done to Rey.
But he knew two things for sure. First, he had finally found the person he loved, his soul mate. Second, Rey was dying. Everything else would have to belt with later. He had to get the luchador out of this cold place that was quickly sucking the life out of him. He took Rey in his arms, and he was startled when he heard the familiar voice moaning in pain. He placed him carefully on the bed and whispered again softly in his ear.
"Oscar, my love… it's me."
Rey opened slightly his left eye as far as the swelling would permit him and met Adam's liquid gaze.
"Is this… a… dream?" he asked quietly, his voice coming out rough and bloody.
Adam flashed a wide smile.
"No… you are not dreaming… I am here… here with you!"
"You… you are not real… you… are not… here… this is a dream" he said almost to himself.
"No… I am real. I have come for you" and leaned over kissing his dry lips to prove him wrong. The kisses multiplied and soon Adam was kissing Rey's eyes, tasting the tears and the blood of his love. He gripped Rey's hand tightly in his own.
"I have come to take you home"
Rey closed his eyes shut and sobbed violently, tears escaping him, tracing their way among the dry blood on his face.
"No…" he whispered his voice breaking. "You shouldn't… have come… you… don't…" but he didn't finish the sentence. A cry of pain escaped his lips and he folded in a foetal position gasping desperately for air. It felt like someone had placed a weight of one tone on his chest. Adam felt the panic inside him rise again. He had to get Rey out of this place. His disease was getting worse by the minute.
"Rey please, calm down" he tried to reason, try to get him to slow down but it didn't work. Rey stretched out his naked beaten body on the filthy bed, his palms clutching tightly the torn mattress, frantically trying to take in air to fill his lungs.
But in vain.
And Adam started to cry. Anger rose inside him, hatred, so much loathing and hopelessness, that it almost blinded him. But before he could react, he heard footsteps behind him. He turned and faced the man he hated so much.
Jacob was surprised to see his son crying.
"Are you crying?" he asked rhetorically. "My son NEVER cries."
"Why?" Adam asked, his fists shaking from the hate and his vision completely blurred from the tears. "WHY?" he cried out loud a second time.
Jacob's face twisted in anger and madness. His eyes shone brightly with the flame of insanity.
"Because this is necessary for your 'becoming'" he replied naturally.
"Becoming?" Adam asked back ironically. "How could you ever think that I want to become like you?"
"Like me?" Jacob spat back in the same mocking tone. "And what do you suppose I am?"
"You are nothing but a freak of nature… a pervert, a deranged twisted fuck who deserves to rot in hell… who deserves to DIE!" he screamed and lunged forward at him, spearing him across the room, dropping him hard against the concrete wall behind. The impact knocked Jacob almost out cold, but unfortunately took much of Adam's strength away. The three men were quick enough to grab him and pull him off the old man. They punched him in the gut and Anderson held him down, while the other two helped Jacob to his feet. Adam fought back fiercely but Anderson was too heavy and too strong to beat. Soon Jacob rose to his feet spitting out blood. He knelt above Adam's panting face and grabbing his hair, he said breathlessly.
"You are no better than that creature you claim you love. Both of you cry like women… but there is still some strength in you… there is some hope for you… it is only through suffering that you will change; like I was changed so many years ago by my own father."
He got to his feet. He looked at the writhing form of Rey on the bed. He was in so much pain, that he seemed to be oblivious to the events that had just taken place. The pain was consuming him completely, and it took all his strength and concentration to focus on breathing. But he was fading… he was dying… Adam screamed from the despair and jerked his body, trying to escape from Anderson. He caught him by surprise and for a minute Adam thought he had escaped. But he managed to take only one step before Jacob kicked him hard on the gut, knocking him face down on the floor.
"Anderson, God damn, hold him down"
Immediately Anderson was on top of him, grabbing his neck with his arm and twisting his arm behind his back almost breaking it.
"Bring him to his knees. I want him to see."
He was jerked violently to his knees, Anderson's arm still around his neck and his hands arm-locked behind his back. He was using his own knees to hold Adam's legs on the ground and soon, he couldn't felt them.
Adam's heart started pounding fast as he saw his father approach Rey. The other two men were standing near the bed, with a lustful smile on their faces…
They knew what was about to happen. And it excited them. Especially Jason.
"No" Adam screamed but to no avail. No one was paying any attention to him any more. Everybody's attention had turned to Rey.
'No, not this' he thought while he looked at Rey, who now seemed to have noticed the three forms looming above him. He brought his arms before him, with the last bit of his strength to prevent them from devouring him.
And it tore Adam apart to him plead.
"Please… no… no more…" he begged.
Jacob grabbed Rey's stretched out hands and sadistically flipped him over to his stomach. Rey started screaming and crawling to escape. Jason grabbed his hair and pulled his head up, arching his body upwards. He looked straight into Rey's eyes and smiled.
"I've been wanting to do this since the day I saw you!" and unzipping his jeans, he took out his rigid dick.
Rey felt Jacob splaying his legs open. There was no escape any more. With one brutal thrust, he entered Rey. And he screamed. And Jason was there forcing his dick in his mouth.
The nightmare seemed to last for ever. Rey thought he heard Adam scream, but it was too distant to register. Jacob was fucking him again, hurting him, breaking his body to pieces. He was bleeding again. The fast thrusts became fiercer and Jacob's hard dick kept raping him. He wanted to scream but he wasn't able. He couldn't even breathe. Jason was forcing his own hard dick in his mouth, pushing it deeper and deeper cutting off the air. Rey's eyesight was beginning to blur. He tried to forget Adam's presence in the room. It was too much to handle.
He kept his eyes closed and prayed for death.
Adam did scream. He cried out to his father, but he wouldn't listen. His worst nightmare was becoming reality. He would never forget the horrible sound of skin slashing and of flesh flapping in sweat. He wanted to close his eyes and shut out the image of his own father raping the person he loved like an animal, but he resisted. He owed that much to Rey. He had suffered so much and it was all Adam's fault. He was exhausted from the effort and the screaming, but he wouldn't give up. He kept jerking his body, twisting it with all his force, trying to get a break from the huge black man, but he was much stronger than the Canadian.
Then he heard Jacob groaning, letting out animalistic cries and hissing like a snake. Adam looked at him and was disgusted when he realised that Jacob was fucking Rey so hard that he was actually drooling from the excitement. His nails were biting in Rey's wounded flesh, while Jason kept fucking his mouth, pulling his head back, thrusting it deeper and deeper. He was trying desperately to breathe, but there was too much hurt coming too fast.
Adam heard his love moan once from the pain, but he didn't hear anything else. He noticed Rey's eyes rolling back. Then Jacob's body stiffened and he came hard inside Rey. At the same moment Jason began to moan softly. He grabbed Rey's head harder and pulled it further backwards. He came in his mouth with a few final thrusts but he didn't remove his dick right away. He just smiled and pulling Rey's hair demanded him to swallow his come. Rey had no choice. Jason's dick was filling his mouth and there was no way he could spit the sperm out. Disgusted he swallowed all of it. And Jason laughed as he made Rey lick his dick.
When the two men released Rey, his body fell on the bed like a ragged doll. He coughed and he would have thrown up but he had no strength in him. As he lay helpless, he opened his eyes and met those of Adam across the room looking at him in pain and anger. He had been crying. He tried to stay awake but his eyes flickered, feeling the shadows slowly creeping in. He felt ashamed, but most of all he felt sorry but not for himself. He himself had given up hope a long time ago, he had accepted his fate. He knew that his death waited eagerly somewhere in a dim corner to take him away and free him of this torture; and surprisingly death didn't scare him like he thought it would. No, his heart ached for Adam. He would be the one left behind. With the last traces of consciousness he prayed to God for forgiveness.
Then his eyes rolled back and started convulsing wildly. Adam screamed again. His voice echoed loudly against the walls of the room. He struggled to escape Anderson's grip, but Henry's boot on his crotch knocked the wind out of him and he fell breathless.
"Get rid of that thing." Jacob ordered.
Adam felt Anderson getting off of him. He lifted his head and saw the huge black man drag Rey's limp body out of the room. Henry followed with a strange grin on his face. Jacob stood right above the hurting Canadian who just now beginning to feel his strength coming back. Jason was standing near the door, still flushed from the excitement. Adam turned and looked at his father. He had nothing to say to this monster. He wanted nothing to do with him. Everything was moving to fast to catch up. Jacob threw him a look of disdain and started to leave.
"Where are you taking him?" Adam asked the last moment.
"Like Vincent, he has played his part. He is of no more use to us."
"Where are you taking him?" he asked again angrily, clenching his jaw.
He didn't answer. Jason started laughing. He knew something Adam did not.
"We gave him to Henry…" the nurse answered. "After he is done with him, Anderson will take care of the rest." And the door closed, locking him inside alone with his anger, his thoughts and his regrets.
The two men walked out of the cabin. It stood lonely in the middle of a huge dense forest, lost from the civilisation and the city's noise. Anderson was carrying Rey above his shoulder and was walking heavily towards the heart of the forest. Henry was following behind all excited that finally his turn had come.
Henry had grown up in the streets of Detroit, an orphan roaming the criminal side of the city. His life was mystery, even to those who claimed to know him since his youth. He had met the old man in the asylum where he was put because of the demons that haunted him. He had been arrested in his house. A neighbour was complaining about hearing weird noises and screams in the middle of the night. She had called the police. When they had come in, the two police men found him fucking the corpse of a man, long dead and decayed. He had killed him with a knife and removed his organs. He was sentenced to life imprisonment in a psychiatric hospital where he would be treated for Cannibalism, Vampirism and Necrophilia. There he met Jacob. They did spend a lot of time together… after all, in that loony bin he thought that Jacob was the only one that made any sense to him, and he was the only one he could talk to. And Jacob had found something he needed in the crazy skinny man, he confided in him, and with Henry, they had perfected his plan to capture Adam and even had begun arranging the details from inside the walls of the asylum. Henry had all the right connections that would put the plan into motion in the right time. He had however one 'small rule'. If he would use his connections and help the old man, he wanted something in return. When Jacob was released, Henry broke out of the psychiatric hospital a few weeks later and joined him in the USA where they were joined by Jason and Anderson, Henry's 'connections'. Now, Jacob's plan was complete. The old man had in his possession what he wanted and it was Henry's turn to get what he desired, it was his turn to put out the fire eating his insides.
He walked eagerly among the tall trees, small trigs and dry branches cracking under his boots. They advanced further into the forest for about an hour until Henry ordered Anderson to put down Rey. The large black man obeyed and without a single word, turned around and left Henry alone with the dying wrestler.
Henry stayed a few feet away from Rey, waiting until he couldn't hear Anderson's footsteps any more. Then he looked at the fallen man, lying naked on the grass. He wasn't dead yet, but he was sure close to it. This creature was by far the most beautiful one he had the 'privilege' of taking. Henry smiled. He knelt beside Rey and unbuckled his belt. He couldn't wait any longer for Rey to die… besides once he was done with him he would be as lifeless as a wooden puppet. Then he would start over his fun, mutilating the body, feasting on the deceased flesh.
Rey was hardly in touch with reality. He had passed out a long time ago. When he came to, he had not the strength to open his eyes, but he realised that something had changed in his surroundings. He could feel the fresh air, the vivid odour of wet grass, the early morning birds' song, but he couldn't open his eyes. He was too exhausted from the abuse and the loss of blood. He couldn't feel his body any more, his legs were numb, his arms useless… and the burning in his chest was spreading like wildfire. His breaths were short and rare. And he was cold… so cold…
When Henry touched him, his mind didn't register the fingers grappling his skin but he knew he was turned on his stomach because the smell of grass and earth became stronger. He tasted blood in his mouth as Henry pushed his dick inside him, but he made no sound. He couldn't react any more to the abuse. He knew he was dying. Henry raped him with the force of a raging bull, and it was nothing like Rey had felt before. The pain was more than he had experienced so far, but again he did not scream, he didn't even make a sound.
And as he lay on the ground, he opened his eyes so slightly. A single tear traced its way down and watered the earth. All sounds seemed to fade, and he couldn't feel anything… not the cold, not the touch of grass, not the pain in his chest, not Henry tearing him in half. There no sorrow... no pain. The sun was rising, shedding its first rays upon the broken man. Rey felt the warmth of the sun on his face and he closed his eyes again, another tear coming to life.
As he took his last laboured breaths, he thought he heard a child laughing.
Then the blood spilled out of his mouth, and saw no more.
The first thing he heard was a familiar beeping sound next to his ear. He tried to open his eyes, but his strength failed him. He tried to open his mouth, but a tube was stuck right in his throat.
Then the pain shot him with the force of thunder.
And he moaned.
And he was afraid.
But a warm firm hand reached down and touched his front with care, easing him back to sleep. There were lips kissing him, luring him back to sweet slumber.
But Rey was too scared. His eyebrows furrowed in pain and despair and he tried to clutch his bed sheets. He tried so hard to react, to move his body, God even open his eyes, but again his body didn't obey. Terror was the primordial sentiment in command.
Then he heard a voice.
Was he dead?
His mind told him that there is no pain in death… except in hell… but if this was hell, wouldn't it hurt more? Wouldn't he be in so much more pain?
No, he was alive, and this was just the beginning of his nightmare. No matter what the voice told him to soothe him, there were images parading in his mind, images that frightened him, images of horrendous things that had scarred his mind and his body for ever, images of dread, fear and dismay. Rey still felt fingers touching his flesh; he could still feel the raw torture, and those eyes!
A voice inside him screamed…
Then his mind went numb again and fell back to sleep, wishing never to wake up again…
Wishing he was dead.
Adam was sleeping restlessly beside Rey on a chair. He was alone in the hospital room, when Rey stirred waking from his drug induced deep sleep. When he heard the familiar sweet voice, he ran to his side, took Rey's hand in his and whispered his name.
He whispered… like the doctor had said he ought to. After three weeks in a coma, they had informed him that he would be very sensitive to bright lights and loud noises. Adam was whispering Rey's name birth name while caressing his hair.
The first time Rey had come around, it was scary. It wasn't like Adam expected. Rey was having such a violent reaction that the doctors had to drug him back to sleep. And he had slept for two more days. Adam still stayed by his side.
This time when Rey woke up, he was calmer, stronger. The tubes were still feeding his veins with medicine and a machine was still hooked to his mouth, doing the breathing for him, but Adam managed his best smile when Rey opened his eyes. He was too weak to do anything else but give Adam that sleepy gaze, and he understood immediately.
"My love… Oscar… it is alright… go back to sleep… everything is going to be fine…" he whispered.
Rey saw him cry but he couldn't bring his mind to function, he couldn't focus. Everything was a blur.
"You are safe" Adam murmured, "Safe with me. No one can harm you any more."
Rey just starred at the blond Canadian in disbelief. He was too weak, but he moved his hand trying to reach Adam's. He wanted to speak, tell him not to leave him alone, that he was afraid, that he loved him… that he was so very sorry… he despaired and Adam saw it.
"Don't try to speak my king. You are too fragile. You must rest now and I will explain everything when you are feeling stronger, I promise. For now sleep. You are safe."
But Rey blinked and nodded negatively. His chest heaved violently and he started crying again. He didn't want to sleep. Closing his eyes brought back the demons, the devils with the haunting eyes. He clutched Adam's hand firmly, never wanting to let go. It was too much to handle.
He didn't want to go back to sleep.
"Oscar, please hear me. It's alright. Please don't cry. I am here; I am not leaving you alone. But you have to calm down. You are still very sick."
Rey's breathing became harder as the memories hit him hard like a freight train. He was out of control. Adam couldn't bring him back, not yet. He called for the doctor and soon afterwards Rey was slipping back into his slumber.
The days passed and Rey's health seemed to be deteriorating. The doctor took Adam in his office and told him bluntly Rey didn't seem to want to live.
"It is up to you Mr Copeland to drag him out of the hell he finds himself into right now. As long as he stays there, there will be no recovery. And it has to happen soon. I know what happened… the police told me and I am very sorry. I understand what he has been through, and I honestly can't blame him for wishing to die. But he has to fight his way out of it. There is nothing I can do any more."
"What can I do?" Adam asked worriedly.
"Everything… anything… Each time he wakes up, there is a nightmare waiting. It is up to you to find a way and fight his nightmares, fight his battles with him."
When he had returned to the hospital room Adam sunk back into his chair. He too had his own demons to face. But Rey came first. He brought his chair next to Rey's bed and fell asleep holding his hand.
The feeling of moving fingers woke him up. Rey was awake again, calm, his eyes wide open looking back at Adam with a clarity he hadn't seen in the luchador for a long while. Adam smiled dashingly.
"Good morning mighty mouse. How are you doing today?"
From beneath the oxygen mask, Adam thought he saw him smile faintly. He had to hurry up before Rey fell into depression again.
"The guys were asking about you. They missed you… even the Olympic Zero missed you."
He paused. He figured this was the time to explain. Rey was waiting eagerly.
"I suppose I ought to explain a few things. Like how you got here and how we escaped… well, to make a long story short, detective Scott found out that Jacob had once an abandoned cabin and coming searching for clues, he bumped into Jacob. The police found me there… they… they killed Jacob and Jason, the nurse on the spot. Then we started looking for you. That black man, Anderson and Henry had taken you outside and they were nowhere to be found. We looked everywhere. We found you deep into the woods, almost dead and… and… cut open…" He took a deep breath. "You have been in a coma for three weeks. But the doctors say you are doing fine. You are still weak and unwell, but there is no reason why you shouldn't get better. After all, I am here with you. And together, we will get through this. Together."
Rey felt tears sting his eyes.
"I know it is too much to handle, but there is no hurry. We will take it slow and take one step at a time. But you have to help me Oscar. You have to let me in, let me fight beside you this nightmare."
He could tell that Rey wanted to speak. He leaned closer to his face and gently pulled out the oxygen mask. Under the laboured gasps for air, his cracked voice mumbled.
"'m…sorry."
"No my king … no… what do you have to be sorry about? I brought it onto you. I should be the one apologizing… but for heaven's name, not you… you, my love, are perfect. I love you too much to let you take all the hurt…to let you take all the pain."
Rey opened his mouth to speak again, but he couldn't breathe any more without the oxygen. The gasps for air became more rapid and strenuous. Adam placed the mask back.
"Don't speak my love. I know it is hard… I know… I am here now; and I am not leaving you… you are stuck with me I'm afraid… and a horde of wrestlers in serious need of psychiatric attention!" Adam joked and his heart skipped a beat in joy when he saw Rey smile faintly.
Their eyes locked for a while, starring, searching to find each other's soul and hold onto that. Rey knew it would be difficult to recover, that it would be hard to chase away those images away from his mind. His body would eventually heal… eventually.
His soul was another story.
Rey noticed a silver cross placed carefully on the table beside his bed. He took it and held it firmly against his chest. He smiled, because he realised who had placed it there…
A knock on the door broke his thoughts and without waiting for an answer, Eddie's head popped in.
"You awake?"
As this was a rhetorical question, Eddie walked right in smiling happily. Rey saw beneath it and realised that Eddie was faking it because he didn't want to make him sad or miserable. By now he had a pretty good idea how bad he looked. Those who knew the truth, he could see their pity in their eyes. But it was alright. For Rey it was enough that Eddie was here too, with him, doing his best… whatever that was…
Eddie walked in and whispered.
"How are you?"
"Eddie?" Adam asked, "Why are you whispering?"
"Because visitors are not allowed at this hour esse… it is late. But I had to see rey rey… I had to give him a few things from the guys."
Eddie was holding a big paper shopping bag which he placed on the bed. He put his hand in and pulled out a fluffy duck…
"This toy 'duck' is from Kurt…"
Adam raised his eyebrows in surprise
"Kurt? A duck?"
"Don't ask…his name is 'Oscar'! Imagine that… it says so on the name tag! And don't look at me like that Adam… "
Rey took the duck in his hands. It was soft, yellow and fuzzy. There was a red tag on its chest with the name 'Oscar'. Rey pushed it. All three men were startled when the duck started quacking. Quickly Rey put it under the covers to silence the noise. He didn't want the nurses coming in the room and kicking Eddie out…He had presents to see!
Adam looked at Rey and smiled. His face was glowing. He was happy that all traces of pain were gone from his face. Eddie had a miraculous effect on Rey.
The duck ceased its noise and Rey pulled it back outside. He was smiling happily… like a small child on his birthday!
Eddie was laughing his ass off.
"That man is needs therapy!" Adam stated.
"Everyone wanted to buy you something, but I figured it would be best if they gave you something to remember them by. So…Rene gave me a little French flag, JBL a cigar to celebrate once you leave the hospital saying it goes with a bottle of Champaign he is saving for you, John gave me his RUCK FULES baseball cap, Kenzo his Japanese bandana, Undertaker his Dead Man t-shirt… there is a lot of stuff in the bag. I will leave it to you to figure out who sent you what! I suppose it will keep you busy for a while… oh… I almost forgot. Torrie asked me to give you her present along with a kiss… but I will just give you her present… I'll leave it to Romeo over there to give you your kiss."
Eddie grabbed a small box from the bag. He opened it and took out a small 'Master View'. On his other hand he held a bunch of 'slides'.
"Do you remember those Rey? We had toys like these when we were kids… Torrie and Billy made these slides from pictures they had taken from the days of WCW until today. You just slip them into the Master View, hold it towards the light and watch the pictures. I don't know how they did it, but the slides are 3-D."
Eddie paused. He looked at Rey. He slowly took a step back and turned to leave, but he hesitated. Rey reached out his hand towards the Latino Heat. Then Eddie saw it; the chain tangled in Rey's fingers and the silver cross in his palm. Rey kept holding his hand out inviting Eddie to take it.
And he took a step closer.
And grabbed Rey's hand, clutching the cross between their palms.
And he broke down in tears.
Eddie knelt beside the bed and cried… and cried…burying his face in Rey's hands. Adam stood up and left quietly the room, leaving the two long time friends alone.
Eddie didn't cry long. He wiped the tears away from his face and looked at the luchador. He too was crying. They didn't speak a word, they didn't need to. They had said all they needed to say with their eyes. They had spent a lifetime together, they had grown up, cried, laughed, hurt, bled together. Eddie stayed on his knees for a long time, holding Rey's hand in his own, like praying. This cross was the best gift Eddie could have done to his friend.
The cross signified everything Rey believed in. It belonged to Rey back when he was in WCW and he had given it to Eddie when was fighting his addiction, saying to him that "Pain and fear can only destroy you. Only faith can help you survive". Eddie found out later that Rey was right. Even though their ways had parted briefly, he still had the cross. And during the dreaded car accident, he still had the cross. He recovered only because his family and his friends had faith in him, because they loved him. Faith had saved his life.
Now he was giving the cross back to Rey. He needed faith to survive, he needed his friends, their love, he needed all they could offer him.
Eddie smiled and wiped away the last wet traces of the tears from his face.
"Rest now mi colibri… get well… because I'll be wanting this cross back…"
He kissed his feverish forehead and left the room quietly. Adam was sitting right outside, waiting patiently. He looked at the Latino Heat and nodded gratefully. Eddie sunk to the chair next to him. Adam patted his shoulder and silently stood up to enter the room. Eddie grabbed his hand and stopped him. They looked each other in understanding.
"I call you in the morning…" Adam informed the Latino. He opened the door and before closing it he thanked Eddie.
Rey was sleeping, the yellow duck lying next to him, and his hands still holding the cross. Adam took the toy in his hands and smiled.
'Now that is disturbing' he thought to himself, while the image of a smiling Kurt holding the duck popped in his mind. He placed it on the table next to Rey and returned on his chair by the bed. It was very late and the comfortable warmth of the room lured him to sleep
A tremble woke him suddenly from his sleep, startling him to his feet. It was still very early in the morning, perhaps too early. Quickly, he put his head together and focused his attention on his surroundings.
Then his heart stopped.
There was Rey lying on the bed, shaking uncontrollably, his oxygen mask taken off! Some time in the middle of the night, Rey had woken up and found Adam sleeping next to his bed. He had managed to take his mask off, tried to call his love by name, but the lack of air had stopped him. Unable to move any more and put the mask back on, Rey had spent almost two hours fighting for air. The last thing he remembered before going on a seizure was feeling a cold hand grip his neck and cut his respiration off completely. Then he lost all control.
Adam had woken up and found his lover shaking violently, his eyes rolled back. He quickly put the mask back on and then hurried outside calling madly for the nurse or a doctor… somebody to come to his rescue.
Returning to the room, Rey was not shaking any more. His body just lay on the bed, non -moving, helpless and limp. Adam approached him, tears filling his eyes, and took Rey's hand in his. Then sobbing began and all he could do was mumble and beg.
"Please don't go… please don't go… please… please… please…"
He never heard the doctor and the nurses coming into the room. He was pushed out from the room and was told to wait.
The minutes that passed seemed like an eternity. With trembling hands, he dialled Eddie's cell number.
"Eddie…"
"What? Adam is that you?" he asked sleepily.
"You… you… have to come now." He stuttered between the sobs, failing to control his tears. Eddie never responded. He just hung up and left the hotel running.
When he got there, Adam was still waiting a few feet away from Rey's room. He couldn't see inside, and no one had come out to tell them anything. Almost an hour had passed when a doctor came out. Both men held their breaths, waiting.
"Mr Gutierrez has ruptured the blood vessels that connect his lungs."
They looked at him in surprise. They looked at the doctor like he had just spoken in a different language.
"It means that the small veins in and surrounding his lungs have ruptured… broken… and blood filled his lungs. It's like drowning. We managed to take out most of the blood from his lungs and have him back on support."
"Excuse me doctor" Adam interrupted. "MOST of the blood?"
"Yes. Mr Gutierrez is in a coma. He is stabilised for now, but this seizure had caused a lot trauma. We need to operate him as soon as possible if we want to save his lungs. If he looses his lungs, he will need a transplant. And given the length of the list of the patients waiting for one… things are not looking good for your friend."
"Then what are you waiting for?"
"We need the consent of his family."
"But his family is miles away… they are in Mexico… by the time they get here, it will be too late…" Eddie shouted.
"Doctor please, can't you do something? We are all he has right now. Please we will sign everything you need." Adam said begging the doctor, pleading him.
The doctor looked at them and sighed. He knew who they were and the history behind his special patient. It was a big risk to take, operating without a written consent, but he was willing to take it. He didn't want to see his patient die. As far as he could see it there was only one way to go, and that was operate. He nodded.
"OK. But I will need someone's signature."
"I'll sign" Eddie offered and he was quickly lead by the doctor into an office, leaving Adam alone outside Rey's room. Two nurses went inside and as the door swung to close, he put his hand and stopped it, taking a peek. Rey was on the bed, with a bigger machine hooked to his body. There were different sounds coming from the machine. One was from his heart, a small line that arched every so often to his heart rate, which Adam thought it was getting slower. Another sound, a creepier one, was coming from the oxygen contraption, going up and down each time Rey took a laboured inhalation. The nurses were ignoring Adam standing by the door, preparing their patient meticulously for the operation. But for Adam the rest of the world had ceased to exist. His eyes only looked the lump in the bed, his Rey who now seemed so small, so fragile. Everything else was a blur. He wanted to walk up to him and squeeze him in his arms; see his face and look into his big brown eyes; kiss those lips and be kissed back.
"Can I have a minute with him, please" he said softly.
The nurses walked out, reminding him that he had only a few moments before they took him upstairs. They left closing the door silently.
And there he was. Alone… again…
His palms were sweating and he rubbed them against his jeans to wipe them. He was nervous…
'Nervous?'
And sad.
No, he wasn't nervous, he was afraid… afraid that this might actually be the last time he would see his king of mystery alive. He had no words to speak. A knot was eating all the words coming to his throat. He stood above Rey and stretched out his hand to reach him. He was trembling. He cursed himself for not being strong enough and closing his eyes, he sighed helplessly. He bent over the immobile form of the luchador and opened his eyes. How he wished just this once, even if it was the last one, that he could gaze into his eyes, and maybe, maybe he would get lost for ever inside them… just this one time… and then he could die in piece. But Rey's eyes were closed, keeping his soul imprisoned in a cold nightmare. For it was a nightmare, Adam had no doubts about it. He just knew that Rey was tormented even now, even in this dying state. And he let a tear slip down his cheek. Why did everything have to be so difficult and so painful? Why couldn't he take some of Rey's pain? Everything hurt… everything… and no matter what he told himself, he knew he was the one to blame. He tried to fight off the idea, chase away the thought that if hadn't been for him, for his selfishness… his love… Rey wouldn't be in this condition… His own father had done unspeakable things simply because he loved his son in a twisted way… he had no idea how he would be able to live with himself. It was then that the guilt finally settled in. He continued to gaze the small Latino, his hand trembling above Rey's face, like fighting with the idea of a simple caress. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all, maybe his presence here only made things worse. Perhaps, he wasn't any help at all, but a simple raw reminder of the hell Rey was fighting to put behind. His fingers didn't find their way through Rey's hair, nor on his burning feverish front. He just took a step back and kept starring at Rey, all alone, with his demons to haunt him.
He had no idea how long he had been standing there, looking at Rey. He never heard Eddie coming inside. It was the Latino's familiar voice that brought him to his senses.
"Don't do this" he advised the Canadian.
Adam looked back in surprise.
"Do what?"
"Blame yourself."
"If it is not me, then who is to blame, Eddie? If I wasn't in his life, if it hadn't been for me, he would still be alive." Adam asked softly never looking at Eddie.
"Do you really believe that?"
"Yes" he replied firmly behind closed teeth, fighting back those tears again.
"But it was you who saved him from almost dying when his family left him."
"Eddie, he is dying now anyway. The difference is, now he has a lot more nightmares plaguing his mind."
"Do you really want to play the blame game right now? Will it help him? Do you think he feels that way? Do you think he blames you for everything that's happened?"
Adam shook his head negatively.
"No… he blames himself."
"What does that tell you?"
"I can't let him do that Eddie… he has to realise that if it wasn't for me, if WE hadn't happened that night then he would still be alive…"
"No" Eddie cut him off "you still don't know him at all. I have known him for years, and he always does the same thing… always. When he loves, he gives a part of himself to the one he cares about. He lost half his life when Angie took the kids and left… Adam, it took me a lot of time to accept, but you are the best thing that has happened to him. He gave you all he had, everything… and you helped him survive… SURVIVE… and nothing is more important than that. You now hold his heart in your hands… don't back down now. His love runs too deep to let you suffer. He takes all the pain for himself even if it is not his fault. That's what he did with Angie and the kids, and that's what he does now with you. He takes it all, he keeps it inside, all of it… all the pain… in the end it ends up being a constant in his life. He always expects the worse to happen. Please Adam, help me prove him wrong. Help me prove him that there is some good in this world that is actually worth fighting for; that there are people who care for him as strongly as he does for them."
Adam was now looking deep into Eddie's eyes.
"Rey has a rare gift. He let's nothing bring him down because he has faith… he has faith in the people around him, in us Adam. He has us to love him. And his love is so strong that finally in wipes away all the hurt. I can see it every time he sees you Adam. The moment he sets his eyes upon you, there is no pain, no doubts, no suffering. Like I said, I've known him for many years, and by now I can read him like an open book. He looks at you, and his eyes shine… I can see the Rey I met years ago, loving, innocent… happy… When you look into his eyes, what do you feel?"
Adam did not speak.
"If it is pain that you feel, if it is pity, then he is doomed. Adam… Rey has always been there for me… always… and this is my chance to stand by him. I am proud to be able to look at him with LOVE, not pity and help him through this with as few scars as possible. But if you can not do that, then this is the time to leave. He will not survive if he wakes up and sees you look at him the way you did when I walked into this room. That is why I didn't let anyone come to visit him. Rey needs love, not pity… LOVE Adam! Can you give it to him?"
Adam looked back down at Rey. He had to look inside and listen to his heart. He knelt down on the floor and took Rey's hand in his own. And he smiled… he smiled with happiness. There was pity for the fragile creature, but the love was so much bigger, so much stronger that it filled him completely, it filled his soul. He wanted to kiss his lips, but the oxygen mask was covering half his face. He just kissed his forehead softly with a kiss that seemed to go on forever.
Rey was still holding the silver cross when the nurses came in and wheeled him out of the room the OR. Eddie was then left alone with Adam. Adam started to leave the room, but before exiting he realised he hadn't given his answer to Eddie. He turned around and calmly, tenderly replied.
"Never doubt my feelings for Oscar… never again…" and left.
Eddie stared at the empty room, towards the closed door.
He smiled and looked out of the window. The sun was shining brightly after all those days of rain. And the sky seemed to shine clearer. Even in this hospital, in the middle of the loud, thick city, there was still hope.
Hope.
He exited the room, locking all his fears and doubts away, and joined Adam in the lobby. It would be a long day.
They had no idea how long Rey was in the OR. They had stopped counting the hours a long time ago. On occasions Eddie would call Rey's parents to give them an update. Some time later, the elevator doors opened and Kurt with Rob came out. They saw the two exhausted men sitting in the waiting area, alone. They approached them and numbly sat with them silently. From all the wrestlers, Kurt and RVD where the only ones who knew the truth.
The truth?
Adam didn't think they had any idea what the real truth was. They hadn't seen the cabin in the middle of the woods, they hadn't seen Rey being tortured and raped by his own father like some piece of trash. They hadn't seen him bleed… and they hadn't heard him scream…
And he could still hear those screams; the images came crushing like a freight train. It was too much to handle. Just too God damn much. He kept seeing over and over the rape, and the abuse. Rey's voice was echoing loudly. He cupped his face with is hands.
A few more minutes passed and Kurt went to phone Vince. When he came back he had a really sad look on his face. He cleared his throat to get the other men's attention. They looked at him and just knew that something had gone wrong.
"What is it?" Rob found the guts to ask.
"It is out" he just replied.
"Oh no" Rob exasperated "How?"
"What?" Eddie asked not realising what was the point of the discussion so far. Adam was feeling exactly the same thing.
"I just spoke to Vince. The story about Rey is out. The whole story… the truth… everything…"
Adam buried his face deep in his hands.
"How is that possible?" Rob asked.
"I don't know. Probably someone talked; maybe someone from the police. Who knows? The fact is that they know. Vince told me that the press is having a field day with this. They are outside the hospital as we speak… I'm sorry."
"Fuck" Adam cried out loud and stormed out of the lobby. It was late the afternoon and soon it would be night time. He walked away from the three men, feeling so upset and angry. It was like a freaking disease. It only seemed to get worse and worse and spread further and further… never giving them a break, never a moment's piece. Like the whole world was against him and Rey.
He stood a few feet away from them, and they respected his need for privacy. He burned with anger.
'How are we going to deal with this?' Adam knew Rey would be destroyed after this. It was out… everyone knew about it? Everyone? It would kill him. His anger rose into such proportions that his eyes began to burn. His knees folded and he sank against the hospital wall.
The doctor came out a few minutes later. He approached them confidently.
Everything had gone according to plan.
"He will be fine. Just give him a few days to get his strength back. You can see him when we return him to his room"
They saw them wheel Rey back to his room. The four men where looking from a distance. They dare not come closer.
"This is all my fault" Adam said and separated himself from his friends. He entered the room with a self-confidence they hadn't seen him have in a long time. The door closed behind him and they remained outside, waiting.
Rey lay sleeping, out of touch from reality for three days. Adam never did leave his side… ever…
When he opened his eyes, everything was blurry. He blinked a couple of times. He managed to focus his eyesight. There was complete silence in the room, nothing was heard. He was glad there weren't any lights on. He tried to open his mouth, but a tube was inside his throat. He traced it with his tongue and realised it was going all the way down to his throat. But he was again grateful he had no oxygen mask on.
He focused his mind. The last thing he remembered was the Adam sleeping and him fighting for air. Now, it seemed like nothing had changed. Adam was still sleeping in the same chair next to his bed. He wanted to cry out to him, but a soft moan escaped his lips.
Adam was on his feet instantly. He was sleeping very lightly anyway. When he saw Rey awake, he just smiled.
"Hello Oscar"
Rey was bit confused still. He continued to look back at the Canadian.
"Don't try to speak. Just blink once for yes and twice for no. OK?"
Blink.
"Are you in pain?"
Blink.
"Where does it hurt Rey Rey? Your chest?"
Blink… Blink…
"Should I call the doctor?"
Blink… Blink…
Then he knew. Rey referring to is aching heart.
"Rey… please don't dot his to yourself. It is not your fault."
Rey moved his fingers slightly. He wanted to touch Adam. And he took his fragile hand in his own, squeezing tightly.
"I know what you are thinking. Don't do this to yourself. Please… Oscar…"
Still, hearing after all this time his love speak out loud his birth name sent shivers up and down his spine. He still loved it and his heart skipped a beat when he heard it from his lips. Those lips and those beautiful eyes! Just seeing the blond man hovering above him with such passion and love, made him almost forget his pain and his nightmares.
Blink.
"Yes? Yes what?"
Blink… Blink…Blink… Blink… Blink… Blink…
Rey smiled slightly.
"I knew you talked too much. I finally got you to bed and now I can't get you to shut up! You Mexicans!" he smirked.
Then he got serious.
"I know Rey Rey… I know…"
Blink…
"I love you too. Now sleep."
The days passed quickly and Rey was beginning to find his strength return slowly but steadily. The tubes were all removed and he breathed without the mask. He was still weak from the surgery and the doctor had decided to keep him a couple of weeks for observation.
The others figured they had to tell him soon about the press and the fact that the incident had been every day on the news for the last week. Vince and the WWE had made no official announcement. They wanted Rey to know first and decide himself what he wanted his fans and the world to know. Still, Adam was scared of telling him. He felt like he was putting the last nail to Rey's coffin. After all, a man could handle so much before snapping. After much discussion and fighting, Eddie insisted on being the one to tell him.
"I should be the one to let him know about this. I cannot allow you Adam to take this one on your shoulder too… let me at least carry this burden for you… please…"
Silently, they agreed. Adam was too tired to fight back any more. He had let himself go a long time ago and just accepted the blows as they came. Nothing made any difference to him any more; nothing mattered… only Oscar did. Only him. As long as he was alive, as long as he breathed and he was able to stare into his eyes that glowed like fire, he was happy… he needed nothing more… he wanted nothing more.
Eddie knocked softly on the door and entered the room. It was dark because Rey was still sensitive to light and to noise. Eddie looked at his dear friend and forced a smile. It was hard to pretend. After all those days in the hospital, he still bore the marks of hell. He had no idea how Rey could smile like a child after everything that had happened to him.
His heart missed a few beats when he saw Rey smile at him. He was wearing the silver cross around his neck and the nurses had left him wear undertaker's black t-shirt. Eddie thought that it only made his bruises show more. The nasty cuts on his face were slowly healing, and he could only guess about the rest of his body. Let alone his soul. He came close to him, smiling back and cocking his eyebrow, like he always does when he is right about something.
"Hey!" Rey whispered.
Eddie sat next to him on the bed.
"How are you filling today, my dear?" he joked.
"Like a strawberry!"
Eddie laughed. Then silence fell and he hated it. He had to find a way to say it.
"Eddie? What is it man? What is wrong?" Rey could always read his friend like an open book. Eddie could never hide his feelings. After all that is why they called him Latino Heat. "Just tell me"
"Rey I am sorry…someone talked and…"
He looked at Rey. The precious smile had gone, disappeared. A mask of sadness now covered his beautiful face, his chest heaving vividly.
"Rey I am sorry… they know everything…"
A sob escaped the small Mexican. Rey didn't want to cry any more, but this was something he did not expect. He could not pretend, he could not restrain is grief. Tears of sorrow filled his eyes as he began to cry. Eddie leaned over and hugged him. To his surprise Rey hugged him back tightly and held onto him for dear life, never wanting to let go. Eddie closed his eyes and held his friend tightly. He knew this was enough; he knew that Rey would ask for nothing more than this simple human touch… nothing. And he would give Eddie back the world in gratitude.
They stayed like this for a long time, just holding each other, crying, until Rey exhausted fell asleep. Eddie looked him back. Rey's face was still moist from the tears and the sadness. He caressed his front, sweeping the traces of sweat and then softly wiped away the tears, careful not to wake him up. He stayed with him for a while and then left the room. He needed to breathe some fresh air, before the hospital choked him. He passed Adam sitting outside and nodding him to enter; he left the building from the parking lot, using his rental car to avoid the annoying journalists and the cameras.
Adam entered the room quietly and sat on his chair as always next to his lover. He looked at him intensely. By now he had learnt by heart every little scratch, bruise, cut, curve and dimple he had on his face. Rey was sleeping most of the time since his surgery and Adam had spent many hours just starring at the luchador. But he had not dared to touch him, not yet. He had held his hand many times, but how he longed to kiss those lips again, run his fingers along his body and worship him once more. Every part of his body and his mind screamed from the longing, the passion and the love. But an unknown force was keeping his hand back, restraining his body. Perhaps he was afraid that Rey did not want him. Maybe after all that misery, he didn't want to be touched again. Maybe Rey didn't love him any more… he cursed himself for feeling like a little school girl who needed confirmation all the time about Rey's feelings. Still… he wanted to hear him say it. They hadn't really spoken since his surgery because he was too weak. He didn't really know how he felt. If Eddie was right, then he couldn't just let Rey take all the blame. He had to force him to share his load, take some of the pain and help him as much as he could by loving him.
"You think too much, you know that?" Rey's tired voice woke him up.
Adam lifted his head and smiled bitterly. He opened his mouth to open, but Rey cut him.
"I have heard what all of you had to say. I heard Eddie, Rob, Vince… even Kurt… and I have heard you… although you did not say much, I sure understood a lot."
"Rey…"
"No Adam… this is the time for me to speak."
"You have to rest."
"Please hear me out… please… "
Adam fell silent. Only he knew how much he was afraid of this moment. The uncertainty of what was coming was unbearable and he didn't know if you could handle it if Rey told him to go away. He looked at his dark brown endless eyes piercing his soul, reading his feelings like an open book and then he broke down. Tears were streaming down Rey's face, silver priceless pearls.
"No, Rey please don't cry" Adam begged as he grabbed his hand, consoling him.
"No…" Rey said between his sobs. "Adam I… love you… and I'm sorry to lay it upon you like this. I love you so much it hurts. And if you leave me I don't know if I'm gonna make it through this. I need you to guide me through this darkness inside my mind. Back then… in the…" he paused, his mind refusing even to speak about it "all I kept thinking was you, all that kept me going was you. When my mind failed me, only the memory of you kept me alive. And when I prayed for death, I only regretted to leave you behind…"
"Oscar don't speak these words… you are not dead, my love. You are here with me… and to hear you speak to me again with so much love! I thought I had lost you for ever… I love you so much… and if you died I would follow you into the very depths of hell if I had to just to be with you… But Oscar, you have to let me in, you have to let me share this nightmare… it is not possible to carry it on all on your shoulders alone."
Rey's tears were sliding down his face freely, his silent sobs chocking him. Then Adam knew. There was no doubt any more. He knew that Rey loved him as much as he did. Beyond all reason, beyond any terrifying memory, they loved each other. In this terror, their relationship would get stronger, more powerful. Nothing would break it, nothing would shatter it.
Adam got finally lost into Rey's eyes and it felt like bliss. Pure happiness.
"I love you Oscar…I missed you…"
"I love you…"
Adam approached Rey and let his lips touch softly those of the luchador. They felt like silk. He kissed them gently, soft small butterfly kisses that slowly turned into strong, powerful kisses. He got closer to Rey, feeling the passion growing inside them both. Their tongues met again for the first time in a long time, each man savouring the other's mouth, the taste they missed, the touch they longed for. Adam felt a burning inside his stomach from the desire and just by looking at Rey he could tell he had the exact same craving. Their kiss deepened and Adam let his hands trail down to Rey's body. His fingers caressed his neck and his shoulder's and came to a halt above his chest. He broke the kiss and looked into Rey's eyes.
"I don't want to lose you again."
"You won't" Rey answered.
"You promise?"
"I promise."
He leaned over and placed his head on his chest. Rey caressed his long blond hair and rested his weak hand on his lover's head. Adam felt so peaceful at that moment. He knew it wouldn't last for long. They still had a mountain to climb.
"Rey?" he said not lifting his head.
"Yeah?"
"What are going to do? With the press I mean?"
"Nothing."
He lifted his eyes and looked in surprise.
"What do you mean nothing?"
"I am not going to tell them anything. All they know is I am in the hospital. For al they can tell I might as well be having my knee scooped up."
"Are you sure about this?"
"Given the alternative? Yes."
"But they are going to ask why they weren't told before? Rey you must at least deny the…"
Rey got angry.
"The what? The tortures? The rape? Adam I don't have to tell them a fucking thing! Why should my life be public domain? Why should I lay my soul bare to them? What do I owe them…" he tried to continue but a cough rose to his neck and cut him off.
"Please Oscar… calm down. Don't shout… it is alright…" he gently stroked his chest, half warming him up half calming him. "We will do what you want. Just don't get upset."
Rey lay back on the bed and managed to get his breathing under control. It was difficult to do so at first but Adam's presence really soothed him.
"I am sorry." He uttered painfully after a while, gasping heavily.
"Stop saying that. You have nothing to be sorry about. I understand. If this is what you want then I'm going to stand by you. I just wanted you to know that you are going to come face to face with them, the press I mean whether you like it or not. If you don't want them to know, then you will have to lie to them; lie to the press, the fans and the roster, your friends Oscar."
Rey was silent just gazing at the tall Canadian. He knew he was saying the truth.
"I am not saying you should tell them the truth, Oscar, I don't want to tell them the truth. This pains me too you know. No one has said anything so far, not me, not Vince, not Eddie, no one. We all waited for you. But they have seen us come here day in day out and we have never talked to them. But this is not the point."
"What is the point of this discussion?"
"Rey what you tell them is not important. What counts is you. In the end, all that matters is your heart and your soul. It is you who has to heal. On the outside but on the inside too."
"What about you Adam? Will you heal?"
Adam smiled. He didn't see that coming. But it only made sense. It was typical of Rey. When he suffered most, he put the well being of his friends above his own.
"Don't change the subject Rey-Rey. We are talking about you."
"I know. I just don't want to look into your eyes and watch you blame yourself."
"Please… don't go there… please…" Adam begged. It hurt him to hear those words. Words he was thinking every passing second, words he dare not admit even to himself.
"No Adam. Don't do this. You are so good at giving advice, but you are not able to follow you own. Is that right?"
Adam buried his face in the hospital sheets and wept.
"How can I not? It was my father who did this to you?"
"That is right Adam. Your father, NOT you. Please stop crying. We both have cried too much and too long. I am tired. I just want to put this behind me."
Adam smiled bitterly and sniffing back his tears, he leaned and kissed Rey's lips.
But it didn't matter how badly Rey wanted to put it behind him. Words remained words and he began to realise slowly that it was harder than he thought. Every time he closed his eyes, the images were there, scaring him, haunting him, eating him alive. Each dream was diseased with bleeding images. He could still feel the cold grasp of the Gordian Knot, the macabre dance of the flail upon his flesh and the frozen touch of Jacob. His ears could still hear his voice talking to him, making him say things he didn't want to, making him do things… making him wish he was dead. Rey tried hard not to fall asleep. He was afraid of sleeping. Jacob might be dead, but he was alive in his head and even Adam presence in the room was not enough to keep HIM away.
And Adam suffered. Each time Rey fell asleep, he was having nightmares. He was writhing, tossing and turning, sweating, mumbling things… and words… terrible words… words that made Adam's blood freeze in is veins, turned his heart into stone. But as soon as Rey was awake he didn't talk about them. He refused them even to himself. Adam figured it was some kind of defence mechanism, protecting his sanity from going over the edge. But he kept his silence. And all he was allowed to do was hold his hand, and be there for the man he loved. He had no idea how much that helped the small Mexican.
It was his last night in the hospital and he couldn't sleep. He had convinced Adam to go and get some decent night's sleep in his hotel room. Adam didn't want to leave him alone, but he respected his wish and left promising that he would be back early the next morning to pick him up.
Now, he was left all alone in the hospital room, alone for the first time. And the silence was deafening. But it was something he had to do. He had to start living on his own again, with his fears and his ghosts. He had to start preparing himself for the inevitable fact of socializing and trying to get on with his life. And for some reason he always pictured himself alone in this battle. His mind didn't register yet the fact that he was not alone, that he had his friends with him, he had Adam. His eyes shot open at the memory of him. All traces of sleepiness were gone. He realised he held Eddie's silver cross in his hand. He had taken it off his neck and was holding it in his palm tightly. Then he realised he hadn't prayed to God in a long time.
He got off his bed and stepped towards the window. He wasn't surprised to find his body weak, aching in every move he made, but despite the pain, he made it to the window. It was dark outside, the night sky was completely black, starless and a huge cloud was covering the moon. There was nothing up there to look at, no point of reference, like a huge shade had covered every light. He turned his gaze down to the city spreading before him. There, he saw millions of little lights, cars, streets, buildings… With his heart's eye, he could imagine hundreds of people driving home, couples walking holding hands, children going to sleep cuddled warmly in their beds with their mums giving them the day's last kiss… children… He had his own once… He looked down at the silver cross. He closed his eyes and let a sob escape him, but nothing more. How he missed them, their laugh, their shining eyes, holding them, kissing them…
'Where are they now?' he asked himself. He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed to God for forgiveness. He prayed for strength and courage. And he prayed for his children to find happiness again, even if that was away from him… that last thought broke him down. It was unbearable to admit it. It was all too much to handle. He slipped down on the floor and fell on his knees, somehow the cross escaping his grasp. His body trembled. Was it from the cold? Somehow he doubted it. It wasn't the temperature of the room but his own heart. It couldn't bear the fact that he was alone. He felt an icy chill run through his body; he sat down on the floor and brought his knees close to his body to warm up.
He was alone, tonight. And he would have to learn to live with his loneliness, his guilt, his fears. Adam said he loved him, but as soon as he found out the darkness in his soul, he would get spooked and run away from him. He would stop loving him and leave him on his own, lost forever. If even Rey himself couldn't face this, if he was afraid of dealing with it, how could he expect Adam to help him? No… he knew that Adam's patience and love would soon run out, that he would abandon him if he saw his misery. And this was something he will not be able to handle. Rey's fear grew with this thought. But how can he live without him? How? He knew he will not survive tomorrow without him. All that was left from his heart belonged to Adam now.
Sitting there alone he made his decision.
He will be with Adam for as long as his lover wants it to. He will give him everything he has… everything and he will ask nothing in return. He needs to love him desperately and needs his love to survive. Without it he is lost... dead… nothing… And he will hold onto him as long as he can. When the dreaded day of separation comes, for it will come when Adam finally sees the misery, the darkness, when these suffocate him, when he realises he no longer loves Rey, then his life will fade away along with their love. But if all he has is the present and perhaps a few more moments to live with the man he loves, then he will take them and be grateful. Only God, only He knows what it is in stored for them.
He lifted his head and looked again at the night sky. There were still no stars to shine but the cloud temporarily moved and let the moon take a quick look upon the sleeping city. Rey's eyes opened and looked out as the silver rays fell upon his face, shedding their unworldly light in the room. It was a moment of peace, a moment of decisions and reconciliation.
The cloud moved again by the wind and covered the moon. Darkness fell again and covered the world. Rey's head lowered in grief. Would he even laugh again? Would he ever be happy? Questions he couldn't answer… plaguing his mind and rotting his soul. All he could do was pretend and hope he would be wrong. But his mind was cursed from the torture; he was sinking in desperation and he wasn't aware of it. He was already fading and he didn't know it. He needed help and he couldn't see it.
He could cry no more.
As he lay on the bed, Adam had no idea what dark thoughts passed from Rey's mind, what negative and disastrous feelings consumed him. There was however something that bothered him, deep in his guts that he couldn't exactly put his finger on. He couldn't sleep. He had feeling of emergency run through his body, his heart was racing as his mind drifted to Rey. Deciding that Morpheus the god of sleep had left him for greener pastures he got up and decided to go down to the hotel's bar and have a drink.
Surprisingly Eddie was there along with Kurt. They were sitting at the far end of the bar alone, talking silently. They didn't want to be heard from the other people around. Adam noticed a couple of people starring at him and the other two wrestlers. They must have been recognised. Paying no more attention to them, he approached the two men and sat next to Kurt.
"Can't sleep either eh?" Kurt asked.
Adam just nodded as he ordered a beer from the bar attendant, who after serving him retired to the other end of the bar, giving them the privacy they seemed to need.
"So… esse, tomorrow is the big day! What time are you picking him up?"
"I'm going early in the morning. I want to avoid the traffic and the press. I guess he will be released around midday…"
"Then what?" Eddie asked "Where will you go?"
"Then I am taking him home for a couple of weeks… to Canada. Far away from here" he replied not looking up from his bottle. They didn't answer back but Adam knew they wouldn't argue. "Eddie?" he paused to ask.
"What esse?"
"Do you think we are doing the right thing with this? I mean, is it wise to just take him away and hide him?"
"As opposed to what?" Kurt asked.
"Kurt is right" Eddie answered back. "Rey needs some time to recover, get his strength back, physically and most important mentally. You are going to have to do this. Let us worry about the rest. The locker room and the crew will be ready for his return, so don't worry about them. Focus on Rey. That is all that matters."
They stayed like this for a while, just drinking quietly and from time to time discussing about different topics just to get their minds off tomorrow. It was pretty late when they decided to call it a night. All three of them walked towards their room. Eddie was the first to say goodnight. Kurt and Adam walked and as they arrived in front of Adam's room, they stopped.
"Hey man…do you have a minute?" Kurt asked.
"Sure"
They entered Adam's room.
"So… what is it?" he asked
"Listen, this is hard so I'm just gonna go ahead and say it… When I was a little boy I had an older cousin, Tania… when she was eighteen she was raped by some creeps a couple of blocks away from home."
"I am sorry…"
"This is not the point…" he said almost frustrated. He sat facing Adam and looked intensely. "Adam, she… she killed herself six months later…"
"What are you saying?"
"All I am saying is be careful. Rey might look alright but he is not. He has the same look on his face like my cousin did right before she committed suicide. The last days of her life, she seemed alright. She was laughing and smiling and looked happy around her family. But I remember seeing her one time, alone in her room. And she had that cold look… empty… dead… hollow… And what scares me the most is that Rey had the same look last night when we left the hospital."
"Kurt I am sorry… I don't know what to say…"
"I didn't tell you this to scare you or warn you… I just wanted to tell you what I know and saw… just be careful man… don't make the same mistakes my family did."
He got up and started to leave. Half way he stopped and without looking back he added.
"Eddie is right you know. Rey needs love to survive. Even if these weren't his exact words, that is what he meant. And what we as friends are offering him is not enough. Only your love can help him survive."
And left closing softly the door behind him.
"I love him too" Adam answered to the empty room.
The three friends woke up early the next morning. None of them had had a decent night's sleep, and none of them spoke on their drive to the hospital. Kurt was riving with Eddie on the passenger's seat and Adam on the back, half asleep looking outside on the still closed shops. The day was promising to be as rainy as the previous ones. Adam couldn't wait to go home. Back there, there would be snow, lots of it, but there would also be the sun. Not hot enough to melt the snow, but bright enough to warm the hearts. It would be better that this damned city weather; grey, dark, cloudy… a weather made people's heart close and wither away.
When they arrived at the hospital Rey was already up. He was dressed up and had packed all his stuff in a sport's bag. He was sitting on his bed, back turned on the door, looking out. Adam walked in and sat next to Rey.
"Rain is coming" Rey said surprising his friend.
Adam took Rey hand is held it. Seeing that he wasn't looking at him, he took Rey's chin and turned his face towards his. He looked deeply into his eyes. They were tired; Rey hadn't slept either. He leaned over and let his lips brush lightly those of Rey. He sensed his odour, the aroma of his skin, the familiar smell he had missed. He felt Rey shiver from the touch of their lips. Adam traced his lover's lips with his tongue, wetting them, savouring them like it was the first time. Rey opened his mouth welcoming it in. He let it explore his mouth, and allowed it lick his tongue. The shivering increased. Adam continued his deep kiss but was taken aback when he felt Rey's tongue strike back. A well-known burn in his stomach rose and spread to his groin, making him hard. He slipped his hands under Rey's shirt and touched his soft skin, his chest and his stomach. They were kissing so passionately, so desperately. Nothing else mattered right there and then, only this, only them. Adam pushed softly Rey back on the bed, without parting their lips. Rey held Adam close to his body. He wanted to feel him, he wanted to be one with him… he needed this. The kiss became fiercer, lustful. Rey felt the same burn in his groin as Adam's hands touched his sensitive skin and reaching up, his sneaked his own hand under Adam's shirt. He touched his lover's back and grabbing him strongly he pulled him down against his body. For one brief moment their kiss stopped and they looked at each other gasping for air.
"I love you" Adam uttered between gasps. He touched Rey's face, his eyes his cheeks, his lips. "I love you" he said again and not waiting for his answer he dived in for another kiss. He kissed Rey's mouth, tasting so sweet, and followed the path down to his neck. He felt Rey shiver again, a moan escaping his lips as he arched his body rubbing his hardness against Adam's muscles. Adam continued to kiss his neck and let his hands caress the Mexican's torso. He began to move against Rey's body, matching his moves with his, like they were making love… Rey moaned again, his voice rasp, needful, begging for more.
Adam felt they were loosing control. For a few blissful minutes they had forgotten they were in the hospital, they had forgotten their torment… they were happy… together… embraced… He knew they had to stop before someone entered the room. They were in the hospital after all, but he found himself unable to hold back his urge. And it was pretty obvious Rey didn't want to either.
Rey feeling his partner touching, loving him felt like his body and mind was on fire. He hadn't realised how much he wanted this, and he hadn't thought how much he would need it. He lifted his head from the bed were it rested and kissed Adam's neck. He let his hands fall from his back lower to Adam's ass and further, to his dick. Adam turned and kissed him again, allowing more space to be touched better. Rey's hands rubbed his dick eagerly and clumsily searched the zipper of his pants. Adam knew they had to stop, but the direct touch of Rey's fingers with his cock paralysed him. He grabbed the bed sheets frantically, but didn't end their kiss, not even when Rey began to move his hand up and down.
"Oh my God…" he mumbled, loosing touch with reality. "Rey please…" he begged.
Rey stopped and looked up at the flushed face of the blond Canadian pleading on top of him.
"Rey… I need to feel you… I want to make love to you… but…" he stopped. Rey didn't let him finish his sentence. Instead he pulled him down to another hot kiss. His hand let his dick and reached his own jeans. With a couple of fast moves they were taken off along with his underwear. He didn't leave Adam the chance to react. Adam wasn't sure that he would have stopped him even if he could.
Lying there on the hospital bed, naked from the waist down, panting and sweating, Adam could do nothing but marvel his lover, this sudden change. He felt Rey's dick against his own, sending him off the edge. Everything was forgotten. It was too late to stop. His dick was throbbing, aching for Rey's body. He brought his fingers to Rey's mouth and slipped them inside. Rey accepted them knowing what his partner intended to do. He licked them, wetted them, played his tongue around them. Soon he released the fingers and Adam lowered them down between Rey's splayed open thighs. Gently, without pain, he pushed one finger inside. Feeling the tight walls of his anus relaxing immediately under his touch he moved it deeper, not reaching immediately for Rey's prostate. Adam wasn't sure he could wait much longer. Just seeing Rey looking at him with so much care, love and passion, hearing his pleads for more, he pushed another finger inside and with his free hand he took Rey's cock and started licking it.
Rey was breathing heavily. His eyes were shut from the pleasure on Adam's mouth around his cock and his fingers inside him. He moved his body lower showing Adam that it was time… that he was ready to accept him. Adam removed his fingers and placed himself on top of Rey. Slowly, gently he pushed the tip of his cock inside Rey's anus. Immediately he felt a surge of pleasure run through his body, like he was struck by lightning. He had to use every bit of his strength not to come right away. Rey moaned loudly and arched his back upwards from the pleasure. He felt Adam's cock slide deeper and deeper and surprisingly there was no pain there, just the yearning for more, faster and deeper. He grabbed Adam and pulled him deeper. And he followed his needs. He pushed his cock deeper in Rey, deeper inside reaching for his prostate. The slow thrusts became slowly faster and faster, but always careful, and his eyes never lost Rey's. As on cue, Adam's moves became faster and harder, And Rey had to bite his lip not to scream from the satisfaction. His prostate being pounded hard and fast send him over the edge. His own dick was throbbing and he was close to coming but he wanted to wait for his love.
Adam was lost in this new heaven. The warmth of his lover's body, smell of his skin, the taste of his mouth; he wanted this moment to last forever. He continued thrusting his dick in and out, flesh on flesh, skin on skin. The sound of their bodies rubbing together, of the sweet arousing sounds coming from the smaller man's mouth. He began to move faster, sensing he was close to coming.
He reached and took Rey's hand and with one single thrust he let his semen spill within the beautiful Mexican body whispering Rey's birth name.
"Oscar…"
Rey hearing his love in this moment speak his name and watching him come so powerfully but silently send new waves of lust. Adam didn't stop making love to Rey, but the few moves he had the strength to do where enough to reach Rey's prostate hard enough to make him come. Rey's body stiffened, and arching upwards again he felt his sperm shooting out. Adam leaned and took Rey's dick in his mouth, licking the semen. He felt it twitch under his care, and a few last drops run down from the tip. Rey lay back on the bed exhausted, breathing heavily. But he was happy, content.
Adam came up and lay beside him. He held him in his arms, Rey's back against his chest and they stayed like this for a few minutes.
"I wish we could stay like this forever" Rey broke the silence.
"Oscar… look at me…"
Rey turned and met they eyes of the blond man. Their faces were a few inches apart.
"I love you Rey-Rey… I am never going to let you go…"
Rey broke his gaze and again turned his back to him.
"That is what you say now… but you'll leave me… everybody does…" and sniffed back his tears. He felt Adam's hand on his shoulder gently pulling him on his back.
"Rey… don't do this. Don't build a wall of ice around you I can't get through. How can you doubt me after what we have been through? You know I love you… you are the most important person in my life."
"I know" he whispered back.
"Then how can you say such a thing? Rey, look at me. I am not going to leave you… never…"
"Never is a strong word."
"I am a strong man"
Rey smiled bitterly. He moved to get up from the bed and away from his hold, but he didn't make it. Adam was too strong and he was too fragile to react.
"Don't shut me out please." He begged. "You think you are the only one who suffers? Rey, if you leave me I'll die. I have no idea how I will make it without you. I need you."
Rey realised he was holding his breath. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Feelings he thought only he had, they were shared by Adam. He lowered his head and sadly replied.
"I am afraid… I'm scared that you are going to leave me when…"
"When what?"
"When you see right through me, when you see inside my heart and soul for what it really is"
"Oscar… I've already seen your heart and your soul. And I know you for what you really are. I love you when you are happy; I love you when you are sad. I love your smile, your shining eyes, your body… but most of all I love your mind and your heart…"
"Aren't you afraid of what you might find in there?"
"No I am not… everyone has some skeletons in their closet. You are no exception my king. I know there is darkness in your heart, like there is in mine. And I have a pretty good idea about yours. But you don't have to be afraid or scared. There is nothing that can chase me away from you. There is nothing in your heart that I hate or despise… Rey… I love you means I love the best and the worst of you… the worst even more… because they make you who you are. You are not perfect… I am not perfect either… so don't shut me out. I know what you are trying to hide, but I can't help you if you shut me out…"
"I… am afraid… but I love you… and I don't want to lose you…"
Rey broke down in tears. He buried his face in Adam's chest as he felt his strong arms rap around him. They were tears of happiness and sadness. Adam held him tightly and kissed his tears away. And Rey felt all the sadness and the pain disappear. His tears backed off and he relaxed.
"It seems you are stuck with me my love…"
"Yeah… it seems like it"
"Hah… I knew you couldn't resist me. You are an 'edge-head' deep inside. You are in love with my exotic Canadian charm" he said uttering the last words with a weird French accent.
Rey laughed.
"You sound like the Pepe le phew…"
"Who?"
Rey's laugh raised to something more than a chuckle.
"You now Pepe, the cartoon… the stinking ferret who always falls in love with a cat and chases her saying how much he loves her…"
"Are you saying that I stink?" Adam teased.
Rey couldn't let this slip.
"Yes." He answered lifting his eyebrows matter-of-factly.
"Oh my God… THIS IS WAR!"
"No, no help" Rey pretend to scream, but didn't make a move to escape his arms. He just surrendered to him. Adam grabbed him tighter and started to tickle him, but Rey wasn't ticklish. Adam gave up trying and just held him in his arms, closer.
"You are no fun. Your 'tickle function' is broken; next stop after the hospital is the repair shop to get you fixed… and I don't smell."
"No you don't" Rey smiled.
Voices from the corridor brought them back to reality. They were lucky they weren't caught from anyone. The embarrassment would be too great for both men. Quickly they got up and put on the clothes they had removed previously.
"Hurry up Rey Rey… we don't want to get caught like this"
Rey quickly put his clothes on, while laughing at their weird situation.
When the door opened, Eddie, Kurt and a doctor found them sitting side by side in the bed, like two kids who had done something wrong and were trying to hide it from their parents. Rey was choking a laugh that was coming to his neck.
"Stop laughing" Adam scolded him giving him an elbow.
"Sorry" Rey choked in his laughter.
The three people standing at the door looked at them as if they were nuts. Both men flushed and out of breath sitting on the edge of the bed. Adam smiling and Rey… Eddie had never seen Rey look so happy…
"Are you guys alright?" Kurt asked innocently.
Eddie laughed loudly, realising what just happened between the two lovers while they were with the doctor making the last arrangements for his release. His laughter echoed in the walls of the room, making Rey burst out his laughter too; a sincere, clear, honest laughter that in other circumstances would have made Eddie cry from happiness.
"What?" Kurt asked again failing to notice the joke they were laughing about. "What did I say?"
Even the doctor was forcing himself not to laugh at the obvious. Kurt looked at them in bewilderment.
"What?" he asked again.
"Gentlemen…" the doctor cleared his throat. "I believe you can leave now" and left.
Adam and Rey got up and walked towards the two wrestlers. Rey was still trying to hold back his laughter. Eddie was standing behind Kurt laughing. Adam came and stood directly in front of Kurt with a sly smirk on his face.
"Kurt dear" he said putting his sun glasses on. "Your capability to grasp the obvious some times matches the way you wrestle."
"Meaning what?" he asked frankly irritated.
"You suck" all three men cried out at once and finally burst out in laughter.
In other circumstances Kurt would have been angry, but seeing Rey laugh again, that childish smile and those eyes shining again, he couldn't help but smile himself.
"You guys… come on… stop this."
"Sorry Kurt… we just couldn't resist you…" Eddie said whipping his eyes from the tears. He grabbed Rey's bag and taking his friend from his shoulder lead him out of the room, leaving Kurt and Adam following them.
"So tell me esse… are you alright?"
"Yes Eddie, I think I am going to be fine… eventually."
"Eventually?"
He nodded.
"Yeah…eventually. With Adam's help and yours, I think I am going to be ok."
And Eddie believed him. He knew Rey wasn't lying about this. This Adam's love and his support, Rey would come back to them. It would take time and a lot of patience but Rey wasn't ready to give up. There were still many nightmares ahead, sleepless nights full of ghosts and bloody demons, but Rey would never be alone to face them. They would always be there to protect him, shelter his glass heart from shattering. He leaned and kissed his forehead.
"It is good to hear that my brother… it is good to hear that"
THE END
