Contemplating Confusion

by ©SimbiAni™ and SweetieK

Summary: A joint effort between two dream-dazed fans, one who can't get enough sappiness, and one who has a tendency to surround herself in drama. In this episode of our adventures, Hermione realizes she has a crush on both Ron and Harry. How will she come to terms with this new issue, and who will she choose? No specific year, and complete AU.

Warnings: This fic is not to be taken seriously. It is the result of a non-HP-writing fan (well, who admittedly dreams HP though) reluctantly bribed into RP-ing HP with a drama princess. Although this has been edited to fic form (meaning, minus all the zany chat inbetween each other's posts), you must still expect to encounter lots of randomness, sillyness, grammatical errors, repetitiveness, loss of sense of time, probly OoC-ness too, and extreme lack of plot. Once more, this fic is here purely for your amusement. You have been warned. Enjoy! Hopefully it brings a smile to your face, hehehe...

Chapter Ten:

Confessions

When they finally reached the Common Room entrance, Hermione said the password, and walked in with both of them. She smiled, sitting in their regular places with her in the middle, Harry on her right and Ron on her left. She grinned, happy that nobody was mad anymore.

Once they were all comfortably seated, Harry turned to her with a serious face. They should- they had to- tell her now.

Ron seem to sense what Harry about to do (though he figured it was more an intro to get him to confess, and he wasn't ready! no!) and started nudging him.

Harry giggled inadvertently and Ron stopped. Harry tried to regain his serious composure, and he gravely told Hermione, "We have something to tell you..."

Hermione turned to face him, fighting giggles. "What is it, Harry?" she asked, as seriously as possible.

Goodness, it was all Harry could do to keep a straight face. How could she be so cuute? And he realized, gosh, Ron must be thinking the same thing! Gahhh... "Well, Hermione, um, it seems, that, Ron and I, we... have come to a sort of realization."

Ron had his head in his hands just then, and Harry glanced at him, chuckling, hehe.

Hermione couldn't take it anymore. She began giggling again. She finally stopped and took a deep breath. "Ok. What is it? What did you two realize?"

"Well, when you say it like that!"

Hermione giggled once then became serious again. "What is it?"

Suddenly Harry thought of a different approach to the "Who do You Fancy?" question. Why not just ask her straight out?

"Well, just in theory, if... if you could, if you were interested... umm, which one of us would you go out with?" He couldn't believe he'd asked it. He'd asked it! Gah! And as much as he wanted her to say him- of course- he also had a feeling now that he didn't want Ron to get hurt either! Gah!

Meanwhile Ron looked up in slight shock, then in anticipation, and then it seemed the room- even with only them three- was filled with a tense air all waiting for Hermione's answer.

Hermione couldn't fight to keep a straight face anymore. She began to stutter, which she only did when she was extremely nervous. "I- I-... er... I mean- I..." Nothing she said was intelligent at all at the moment. She just gaped and looked like a fish out of water.

They still waited for her to say something, something coherent. They barely even moved, if only to keep breathing, and hardly even that.

Hermione finally was able to say at least a sentence. Her reply was "I don't know..." She looked down slowly, then back up at both of them.

As Hermione glanced from one boy to the other- her very bestest friends, Harry knew she considered them to be- she seemed so lost. He suddenly felt bad for having asked her that. How could he have put that type of pressure on her? Even if she only felt friendship for either of them, asking who she could possibly love was totally unreasonable.. He started to apologize.

"Oh, I'm sorry, 'Mione, I didn't mean to put you on the spot like that... it's just- just-..."

Hermione decided this was the time to tell them. "Its not that Harry... its just that's why I've been so distracted lately. I was trying to decide.." she said in barely a whisper.

As she looked down at her fingers, Harry gave Ron a look, the kind that said, tell her already - It was if Harry had already decided what he wanted most was more that his friends be happy, even if that meant them being together without him... Hermione had to like Ron back, once he told her, she'd finally confess to having liked him all along and had simply been mad about him not telling her from the beginning... This is what was going through Harry's mind.

As for Ron... he was in a major panic mode. He caught Harry's look and thought how could he? Hermione was always mad at him for one reason or another... no matter how good friends they were this couldn't possibly ever work out in the romantic sense, could it? Not to mention, his extreme jealous tendencies, heh... goodness...

Hermione crossed her arms over her stomach, saying nothing more. She just looked into the fire, wondering what they would say. She knew something like this would happen and that's why she didn't tell them earlier.

At her silence, Ron took a breath. "Hermione?"

Hermione turned to him and looked up at him questioningly. "Yeah?" she asked softly.

Harry sighed without realizing it, feeling wispy suddenly.

Ron gulped. "It was me. I... I was jealous for a reason, a reason I should've told you earlier, months or maybe even years ago..."

Hermione suddenly understood... kinda. "So you like me, and Harry doesn't?" she asked suddenly, cutting into Ron's sentence.

Harry fidgeted, as Ron squinted in confusion. "Harry? Like you? How? I mean, we like you, but... what I was trying to say, was that, I think, I'm in love- with, you... have been, for a while now... ya know?"

Harry sighed to himself. Ron was still clueless that Harry had been falling for their best friend too... oy. Harry suddenly wondered whether that was a good or bad thign. He tuned back in to see her reaction to Ron's confession.

Hermione nodded distractedly, not having heard exactly what Ron just said. "I've just been so lost, lately, Ron. I've felt... crazy..." She briefly wondered that maybe they knew her issue and maybe that's why they'd been acting odd around her lately. Hermione took a deep breath and flushed. She looked back up at Ron, then down again, biting her lip. "If I knew which one of you I liked it, would make things a lot easier..." she said softly to herself.

Harry paused- had she just whispered what he thought she'd had? She was torn- ohhhhhhhh no it was true! He tried to stay quiet but he really wanted to turn her around and ask to repeat it out loud, heh...

As for Ron... "'Mione? I just said- I love you! Doesn't that mean anything to you?" He took her hands in his, and made a point of holding them. "I always have, 'Mione... My 'Mione..."

Harry opened his mouth to add something, but instead just leaned a little forward, to see her reaction.

Hermione just stared and didn't reply. She closed her eyes, feeling tears that threatened to fall then opened them when they were gone. What she needed to know was if Harry liked her. She didn't know what she would do if he did.

Ron was getting impatient. Hermione seemed to be in a little state of shock or was it simply indecision? Why was she being so speechless about this?

Harry decided he had to break this silence, it was agonizing. "Hermione, of course you feel the same way about Ron, right? Right?"

"I... I don't know," she replied softly. She looked straight at Harry and continued biting her lip. She took a deep, shaky breath and looked from Ron to Harry and back again.

The boys watched her looks go back and forth, then suddenly, Ron couldn't take it no more.

He leaned forward, put his hand to her cheek and captured 'Mione in a sweet soft kiss...

Hermione pulled away slowly and looked at him. She'd just kissed her best friend and one of the people she had definitely fallen for!

But.. somehow it didn't feel like she thought it would have. It wasn't.. right. At all.

Ron seem crestfallen. She had pulled away. And she was still not saying anything. Something was clearly wrong. She didn't love him. She didn't even like him that way. If you finally kissed the person you liked for a long time, and they liked you back, there was supposed to be sparks, and actual magic feelings. He may have felt them for her, but it seemed clear she was not feeling that way about him. So much for finally being brave and confessing his true feelings... he should have just stayed shut. Stupid, stupid Ron, you're always doing things without thinking...

Harry had watched the kiss with baited breath. Oh, how he wanted the both of them to be happy. But it was seeming something was very wrong. What could it possibly be? Why wasn't she saying anything? Didn't she know she was breaking Ron's heart more by the minute? Every second ticked by like bomb waiting to go off with painful results (as if anything could hurt worse than right now)...

Hermione just very slowly and slightly shook her head. She closed her eyes again. It was obvious it was Harry she liked, and not Ron, but.. how could she tell them that? Especially if Harry didn't like her... Just then Harry reached out his hand to Ron. (Yes across Hermione, heh, I rember she's still sitting between them).

Ron stared at it in confusion. Then he grumbled "good luck to whoever you do fancy...!" at Hermione and stood up, pushing Harry's hand aside. He headed for the stairs.

Harry suddenly felt mad at Hermione.

"What is with you? Don't you realize how hard that was for him? Hell, for me? Ugh!" He got up and ran after Ron.

RP Disclaimer: Hermione is all SweetieK. Harry and Ron though, are SimbiAni's sappy expressions. Other chars' usage are varied, depending on whose RP turn it was, hehe.

Movie/Book Disclaimer: JKR and WB own the books and movies. I make no money off this zany sappiness, none at all. Honestly.