Contemplating Confusion

by ©SimbiAni™ and SweetieK

Summary: A joint effort between two dream-dazed fans, one who can't get enough sappiness, and one who has a tendency to surround herself in drama. In this episode of our adventures, Hermione realizes she has a crush on both Ron and Harry. How will she come to terms with this new issue, and who will she choose? No specific year, and complete AU.

Warnings: This fic is not to be taken seriously. It is the result of a non-HP-writing fan (well, who admittedly dreams HP though) reluctantly bribed into RP-ing HP with a drama princess. Although this has been edited to fic form (meaning, minus all the zany chat inbetween each other's posts), you must still expect to encounter lots of randomness, sillyness, grammatical errors, repetitiveness, loss of sense of time, probly OoC-ness too, and extreme lack of plot. Once more, this fic is here purely for your amusement. You have been warned. Enjoy! Hopefully it brings a smile to your face, hehehe...

Chapter Seventeen:

Dangerous Cravings

Ron sat up. "Is it bedtime yet? I'm feeling kinda hungry now... Anyone up for sneaking into the kitchens?"

Hermione nodded. "I'm up for that last idea," she said, standing. Nobody could believe it. Hermione Granger, sneaking into the kitchens past curfew for food? She really had changed.

Harry shrugged and replied "Sure. Why not? If Hermione's up for it, we gotta tag along.." he chuckled.

Hermione took his hand again and tried to pull him up off the couch. "You weigh a ton, you know that?" she asked, struggling to pull him up and finally making it.

Harry pouted. "Do not. Ron is two of me now!" he chuckled.

Hermione took his hand again and tried to pull him up off the couch. "You weigh a ton, you know that?" she asked, struggling to pull him up and finally making it.

Harry pouted. "Do not. Ron is two of me now!"

Hermione grinned. "I bet I could pick Ron up!" she argued, grinning.

Harry put his hands up in surrender. "No, you're not gonna get me that way. I learned the hard way never to challenge you again!"

Hermione laughed and then pouted. "Aww, you're no fun!" she said, her bottom lip out and her eyes giving the ¤puppy dog look¤...

Harry opened his mouth his protest. "C'mon! You're honestly saying you're gonna play fair from now on?"

Ron then gave a little wave of his hand- "You know, I don't mind you trying to pick me up.." then collapsed in chuckles.

Harry put his hands up in surrender. "No, you're not gonna get me that way. I learned the hard way never to challenge you again!"

Hermione laughed and then pouted. "Aww, you're no fun!" she said, her bottom lip out and her eyes giving the ¤puppy dog look¤...

Harry opened his mouth his protest. "C'mon! You're honestly saying You're gonna play fair from now on?"

Ron then gave a little wave of his hand- "You know, I don't mind you trying to pick me up.." then collapsed in chuckles.

Hermione smirked and walked over to the giggling redhead. She grabbed hold of his feet and put a hand on his back. Without another word she picked him up into the air.

"HEY!" Ron shouted. "Put me down!"

Harry laughed. "There is no way you could really do that with your skinny little frame! Admit it, you snuck a strengthening spell somehow... haha..."

"I did not!" she said truthfully. "Watch!" She supposedly used finite on herself to end all spells she could have put on herself... then picked up Ron again.

Ron laughed when Hermione couldn't pick him up but really loved her for trying

Harry pulled her into a hug then they headed stealthily downstairs, under Harry's cloak.

Hermione laughed softly. "Gain weight, Ron?" she whispered in his ear, grinning.

He turned red and gave a weak chuckle. "Well you know... working out on quidditch and all..."

"Uh-huh. Sure you have. Missing the quaffle takes a lot of work," she teased, her eyes showing pure amusement.

"You mean getting hit with it!" Ron stuttered defensively.

"That isn't much better, Ron..." Harry added helpfully.

Hermione laughed but stopped immediately as soon as she saw Snape heading their way. Oh no. Ron's shoelace was untied and it was hanging way out of the cloak. She nudged him, trying to get him to look down.

Ron shifted uneasily. "Quit jabbing me, Hermione! Watch your elbow!" he whispered loudly.

Hermione suddenly had an idea. She used a spell to cut his shoelace. Snape would think it was there the entire time!

Snape walked up and grabbed it too soon. He pulled Ron's foot out of the cloak.

Hermione would have laughed, had it not been so serious.

Ron shrieked as he was upended, and the cloak fell with him. In two seconds time, all 3 of them were revealed, and in very, big, trouble.

Snape nearly smirked, but kept his scowl.

"Students out of bed? You've been making it a habit to sleepwalk, Potter. And look, this time you brought your little.. friends." he said, referring to Harry's third year (movieverse).

Harry glared at Snape and answered simply, but in a tight voice. "If you want to sentence us, go ahead. We were simply headed for the kitchens to something to eat as we missed dinner. What shall it be? Dungeon cleaning?"

Ron grabbed his arm and whispered "What's with the honesty! You're going to get us killed!"

Hermione's hand tightened a bit around Harry's. She looked like she had been Petrified... well, she had been before.. but that's a completely different story. Just the same now, she couldn't move and couldn't even talk.

Snape noticed their hand holding but thought nothing of it. "Lets see," he started. "Talking back to a teacher is one week and a half for your comment, Mr. Weasley. And another week for being out past curfew. Two weeks and three days is how long you will have detention with Filch on weekdays. The weekends you will be doing detention for me. Now get back to your Common Room before I add more days!"

Ron let out an exasperated sigh, Hermione a relieved one, and Harry just grabbed the cloak up from the floor and trotted after them.

"We're lucky we didn't get more!" Hermione whispered, finally moving again.

Harry laughed at that, and Ron shook his head. "As if we could handle anymore!"

"Well you know how Snape is. The greasy haired git would have given us a month if Harry here had said anymore!"

"Wow, Hermione, language!" Harry said with wide eyes.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "He is! The slimeball should take a bath and then talk to us! I could smell him!"

They arrived back at the Common Room, now quite exhausted, and hungry to boot.

Ron and Harry both flopped onto sofas, and seemed intent to call it a night right there, hehe.

Hermione conjured up plates. "It's not the kitchen food, but it's the best I can do..." She waved her wand and food appeared on all three plates she had set out. She performed a heating charm, waited a couple minutes then took it off.

Ron gaped. "You mean coulda saved us the horror of facing Snape and getting detention and you didn't think of this before?" He nearly fainted. "I think I've just lost my appetite..."

Harry chuckled. "Yeah, Hermione, we could've settled for your food spell if you'd told us first. Anything's better than detention!"

Her mouth fell open. "I just now remembered I even knew this spell! So don't blame me that we got detention! We would have only had ONE week if you had kept your mouth shut!"

Ron went pale. "Hey now, Harry's the one who talked back! I was trying to stop him!"

Hermione scowled. "Yup. Night. I'm going to bed," she said, pushing her plate away and walking towards the girl's dorm.

"Impossible." Ron sighed.

Fred rolled his eyes. He had been there since they got back.

"Not her fault Snape caught you. It wasn't her shoelace that was hanging out." (Wait.. how did he know that?) He had been standing in a nearby classroom. He'd been on his way to the kitchens with George.

"Well," George said, looking at Harry. "Let her go... I'm sure she'll forgive you guys in the morning!"

Fred grabbed Hermione's left plate and started eating. After all, Hermione hadn't ate a bite of it. Why let it go to waste? He finished and used a spell to get rid of the plate and fork. "Night," he said, heading with George back to the boys' dorm.

Ron and Harry were left to themselves, and they picked at their food, eating it up a bit slowly becuz they were tired, but they soon finished and did the same cleaning method, then headed upstairs. Finally, sleepytime.

RP Disclaimer: Hermione is all SweetieK, so was Snape, and the twins. Harry and Ron though, are SimbiAni's sappy expressions. Other chars' usage are varied, depending on whose RP turn it was, hehe.

Movie/Book Disclaimer: JKR and WB own the books and movies. I make no money off this zany sappiness, none at all. Honestly.

AnyaSimbi : these ppl are so damn lucky there is no such a thing as "can't use magic for personal gain" in this verse, haha

Sweetie13009 : LoL

AnyaSimbi : seriously, they'd be so screwed... hehehe