Heidi: WORDPAD! Oh its been a while. Blah blah. Brodie ran away to Bethany. Well if that stupid-math-clown-loving piss head bum crapper wants to run away as soon as the maths is gone, that is her problem. FOOL! I will not be abandoned! You Mr-Savage's-maths-classes-loving math person! I spit at you! Grr…….. The penguin man will get you! Oh you want to fight me? No, you must fight me with card-thingies Brodie-boy! But first… you must card-fight someone else! While I sit at a big table in a big castle and drink red wine. Oh-HO, so you want to jump off my castle eh? You math-loving bug-eater! I shall walk on your grave!

Brodie: Don't think i'm going to apologies to you. u wouldn't let me use your computer. I'm going to Bethany and listen to Placebo.

Heidi: Well poo-poo to you, artichoke head! I will not be abandoned for good music and Miss Anitema, who I DISCOVERED playing MATH GAMES! So, WHO LOVES MATHS EH, BRODIE-BOY! THAT'S RIGHT, YOU! You traitor Mr Savage pom-pom-pushing bum poo! You ain't all that and a bag of potato chips!

Brodie: does not bother to answer

Heidi: Yes, you are INSULTED! Go kiss raspberries you knob!

Brodie: raspberries are yum so i can kiss them as much as i like, I'd kill Mr Savage with a fork anyday, you don't have the pants to, you pansy boy.

Heidi: Obviously you don't know what raspberries ARE, you lightbulb-head! I roll my eyes like a surfie at you! You are a mathematical disgrace, Brodie-boy!

Brodie: I'd rather be a mathematical disgrace than a smarty-pants like you who think's they are god's gift to men but really are a hairy old wog girl, with a moustache.

Heidi: Mathematical disgrace is nothing to be proud of, window-licker! MR SAVAGE IS A MATHEMATIAL DISGRACE AND YOU ARE HIS SECOND BEST FRIEND! I unclog my nose at you, you pig-dog! Excuse me while I sip my wine, laugh, and sit at my big table drinking wine, Brodie-boy!

Brodie: MR SAVAGE WOULD BE PROUD OF YOU!

Heidi: …………………… For drinking wine at my big table, watching a TV screen of all the goings-on in my castle like a pervy-freak guy, hello my name is Pegasus?

Brodie: leaves

Heidi aka Pegasus: YES! YOU RAN AWAY! I WIN, BRODIE-BOY! much sipping of wine Ahh yes, wine…

Ooh, sorry about that, my friend and I were having a bit of a discussion and I think I'll leave it there. Anyway!

The Friendship Journal, Chapter 3

Alright stupid –

…

That's better, that's a GOOD way to start a stupid journal entry.

Anyways, my hikari wrote about his day (actually he cheated because it wasn't detailed). Anyway, after I dacked him and kicked him up the – oh by the way, I was surprised he wasn't wearing women's knickers, he seems the type. He wears boxers,

…

No, blue ones. Not pink. Dammit, I'm usually really good at guessing people's underwear. For example, I know I only wear red boxers, and Marik wears black.

…

Except for that time his hikari Malik hadn't done the washing so he went commando. Boy did his leather chafe! Bahahahahaha!

But Marik's bikini line isn't the point – that's actually a gross topic. But I had to put that story in here in case someone reads this.

Anyway, the story I actually WANT to put down in you, inanimate royal blue friendship journal, is the one that happened today.

Firstly, I hate going to school. My retard hikari makes me do it. Marik's hikari makes HIM do it. And Yami's hikari makes him do it – HA HA STUPID PHAROAH, ANYTHING IS WORTH SEEING YOU SUFFER!

…

Except maths. I am in maths. Stupid Yami isn't. Marik should be but he tends to go off and torch cats. Marik hates cats. Can't understand why. He's Egyptian isn't he?

So anyway, there I was rotting away in maths class. Outside I could see the Pharaoh and his short, disgustingly-big-eyed hikari doing sport.

I hate them. I should have been doing sport! Hitting people with wooden bats is always fun – oh, and ACCIDENTAL.

Anyway, then I see Marik casually wander over and set Yami's shirt on fire. Classic, I know. Ryou calls Marik a "pyromaniac." I call him Marik.

So then the incredibly boring math teacher waddles outside to help. I don't know how a fat MATH teacher planned to deal with a FIRE but oh well.

Marik yelled "stop, drop and roll baby!" and demonstrated, only he rolled all the way home. Odd.

So the teacher was gone and I was lying on the table laughing at Marik, like anyone would. Unfortunately Kaiba –

We all know Kaiba, right? Tall, rich, really aggro? I think he has a pole up his arse 24/7.

Anyway, Kaiba was sitting next to me and I was laughing on his papers. Here's what happened:

Kaiba: What the hell is so funny? Marik just tried to kill the Pharaoh in the middle of Phys Ed. Now get off my Math.

Me: Chill Kaiba. Look, out the window, someone's dying!

Kaiba: I KNOW, you mentally retarded worm! Get off the desk before I FORCE you off!

Me: Force me huh? How about I take that cedit card of yours and swipe it where the sun don't shine!

Kaiba: Go ahead and try.

So, inanimate royal blue friendship journal, I DID try. I managed to get his wallet out of the pocket of that poncy white jacket, but as I was getting out the credit card, Kaiba broke a chair over my head.

But I think I can safelt say that I won that fight. I didn't fall over when Kaiba hit me with the chair, so there. I was planning on disembowelling him with one of the chair legs actually (once I stopped seeing double), but Ryou got some carrots out of my lunchbox and threw them at me and I calmed down.

I hate carrots.

Bakura, Tomb Robber and Lover Extraordinaire, when I rule the world I will destroy all carrots and Kaiba's stupid jacket!

Well that was the third one, hope you liked it. My friend is reading over my shoulder which is annoying. I have decided the next few chappies are: Yami, to Joey, to Kaiba, to Marik, to Tristan, to Duke... and that's it so far. Enjoy! Please R&R!