Chapter 23: The Family Secret
The day's classes ended with the snow arriving again outside the castle. Hogwarts was once again blanked in white. Amelia spent a few hours with Draco in the library and when he had left her she cast a playful spell onto a paper air plane and sent it to find Hermione. Within minutes Hermione was in the library with Harry, Ron, and Dominic following close behind, only they were under the invisibility cloak.
"Just in case we stay in the library too long," Harry smiled as he appeared with the other two boys.
"Like its going to do a lot of good for hiding five people Harry," Amelia laughed.
"But it might get us into the restricted section should we need too," Hermione said as she took the cloak from Harry and shoved it under the table.
"Alright so are we going to be left in the dark or you gonna fill us all in?" Ron asked as he looked at Dominic and Amelia.
"Well there are still a lot of people in the library so I really don't want to speak too loudly, and considering you guys aren't occlumentic we can't use that method so I'm gonna try a little trick that I learned in transfiguration," Amelia said as she pulled a small glass cube out of her bag.
"What is that?" Harry asked looking at it strangely, "it almost looks like a rememberal but its square."
"That's exactly what it is, but its called a memory box," Amelia laughed, "you can place memories or thoughts into it and they are stored there. Watch," she said as she tapped her wand onto the box and then onto the side of her head. The tip of her wand began to glow a strange orange colour and when she touched the wand back to the box the box filled with orange smoke, "see, now the memory or thought is in the box."
"But what good does that do us?" Ron asked, "I can't understand orange smoke..."
Amelia giggled and with a flick of her wand and some words that no one else could understand the box turned into a leather bound book. She opened the book and there on the pages was exactly what was the though it her mind, "you guys read up on the family secret and Dominic and I will start looking for some books to help us," she said as she and Dominic got up from the table and left Harry, Ron and Hermione with their family secret.
When the three friends finished reading they all scattered by Hermione's orders into different parts of the library to fetch books that may help the cause, "look for anything in potions, and transfigurations that uses the Phoenix. Harry try to find some kind of records on wand making and the strength of the Phoenix feathers. Ron you go looking for breading and biology of the Phoenix and I will go and find Amelia and Dominic to see where they are looking," she said and the three for them split up.
Hermione found Dominic in a section of the library holding a large old book that had two wands crossed on the cover and a Phoenix feather between them, "what have you found Dominic?" she asked as he handed her the book.
"It's a book on Phoenix feather wands, there is a whole chapter on Dumbledore in it. I have a funny feeling that we are going to find lots of information in it," he said and continued looking at the shelf.
"Would you like me to take it back to the table and you can continue the search?" she asked. Dominic nodded and Hermione walked off through the library to find Amelia. She spotted her sitting on the floor in a corner between two bookshelves. In her hand was a small book with a red cover and gold leafing on the front, "what have you found?" Hermione asked as she knelt down beside Amelia who had a look of distress on her face.
"It is the Bellatour family tree, my mothers family tree," Amelia whispered, "most pureblood wizard families have them here. I really don't like the idea of all the family secrets being out in the open like this. I mean what if this book tells us something that my mother is trying to hide?" she said handing the book to Hermione. The gold Bellatour crest was on the front, "do you think, there is any way we can get this out of the library without anyone knowing?" she asked.
"I am sure there are ways. Or at least we would cast a spell on the book to hide anything important," Hermione smiled trying to make Amelia feel better, "let me take it back to the table and read through it and I will tell you what I find. You keep looking." she said.
"Alright, I have a few other ideas that I want to research. I will join you shortly at the table." Amelia said as she stood up from her seat on the floor.
"Ok, I'll come and find you if anything really important comes up," Hermione said as she turned and left the row of books.
Amelia ran off to find Harry, she needed him to help her into the restricted section with his invisibility cloak. She found him in a far corner of the library with a book in his hands. His eyes were wide as saucers as he read the book, "what's the matter Harry?" Amelia asked as she sat down beside him.
"Have you ever heard of the double wand technique?" he asked her.
She shook her head and he motioned for her to sit right beside him to read a passage in the book.
"Godric Gryffindor was one of the first wizards in history to combined two tail feathers of a Phoenix into a wand. The wand possessed more powers than ever imagined, this power was one of the reason for the anger of Salazar Slytherin and one of the main reasons he left Hogwarts. He tried himself to combine his wands but his wand was of the tail hair of a unicorn so it wouldn't work. Gryffindor concluded that it was only able to happen with the Phoenix. Very few wizards now can handle the double wand and only one other Headmaster of Hogwarts possessed a double wand," Harry read as Amelia's heart rose in her chest, "Dumbledore, is the only other Headmaster to master the double wand. His wand is made of the feathers as mine was. Fawkes is the Phoenix. Voldimort wants Fawkes for another feather," Harry whispered into Amelia's ear.
"But why would he want my mother then? That still doesn't make any sense," Amelia sighed.
Harry pointed to another passage in the book. Tears began to roll down Amelia's face as she read what Harry had found.
"The feather must come to be the same way as the first. If the Phoenix sheds a feather than then feathers can be combined. If the feathers are pulled they must be pulled by the same person,"She gasped as she realised what was being hidden, "my mother pulled the feathers, she is needed to pull more!"
"If Voldimort gets what he needs, then he'll be as powerful as Dumbledore," Harry said, "but there is a catch, Voldimort is corrupt and so are the feathers in my wand and his if your mother pulled them. They are stained with human error, the wand may not work at all or it make be eviler than anyone could imagine," he added as he flipped ahead in the book and pointed to a passage about the power of the double wand, "Dumbledore would only use his wand for good, that must be why he was able to master it and his wand was made of shed Phoenix feathers. A gift you might say from the bird itself. If I had a wand like that now, I don't think it would work. It would probably blow up or something because if I came face to face with Voldimort I would be filled with fear and rage and those are the things that work against the wand."
"Isn't that all that fills Voldimort though?" Amelia asked.
"Yes, but he is a powerful wizard, he might be able to use it for bad and it would make everything really bad," Harry sighed.
"If he did that, your wands would match anymore, Harry he would be able to kill you in an instant. He wants my mother to get to you," Amelia sobbed.
Harry nodded and hugged Amelia, "Dumbledore wont let it happen," Harry said trying to sound convincing.
"Harry, you should go and fill Hermione in on all this," Amelia said as she stood up.
"Where are you going?" He asked as he watched her turn away.
"I need to calm down. I need to think. I just need to be alone for a little bit, please fill everyone in on everything and see if you can find out anything else. I need to do something," she said and transformed herself into her animagus and flew away.
"Amelia wait!" Harry called out but she was gone.
Harry called out to Dominic's mind as he ran back to the table. He found Hermione working away over some books and some parchment. She looked up at him to see the worry and the fear in his eyes.
"What is it Harry?" she asked as he through the book down on the table.
"Read this, Amelia is convinced that this is the reason," he said as he grabbed his cloak and headed for the door of the library.
"Where are you going?" Hermione called.
"To find Amelia!" Harry yelled, "you find Ron and Dominic and read whatever you have now, find out as much about the Double Wand as you can."
"Double Wand?" Hermione said as she turned back to the table and grabbed the book, "oh god we are in deep here!" she said under her breath and ran off into the library to find Dominic and Ron.
Amelia flew down into the darkest corner she could fine, deep withing the innards of the castle. Down further than Snape's class room and further than the Slytherin common room. She was far into the dark dampness as she could pull herself. She landed in a corner, no torches lit the walls of this place. It was the deepest hole into the earth she could find. She pulled herself out of her animagus form and fell to the floor. She pulled her knees up to her nose and wept into her hands. Amelia wanted to sink as far as she could away from everything and into the darkness or the light that was not this place. To many things at Hogwarts had brought on to many fears. Her mind was filled with the fears and horrors that had been something unimaginable until now, but now the fear was really real. She cursed herself, through her tears, for wanting, so badly, to know the truth and her mother for keeping something, so terrible, a secret from them. She wept into her hand for a long time until she drifted off into sleep. Amelia didn't realise she was asleep. She closed her eyes and open them again and thought she was wide awake. This dark unknown location began to play tricks on her mind. She was spinning, the walls around her would not stay still. She felt dizzy and cold. A chill filled her body, coming through her clothing and chilling her to the bone. The dark walls spun around her as vivid green eyes began to gaze upon her. Hundreds of eyes, all around her. Dark green and sick looking. She began to hear laughing, evil horrible laughing. It was all around her spinning and coming from all directions but not one single place. The dark place began to spin faster and faster. Hands grabbed at her. They felt like dead, cold, boney hands. They ripped at her clothing and at her hair. The laughing became frenzied., the eyes brighter, the spinning faster. Her hands felt frozen, her legs were locked, panic took over her entire presence but she could not move. She could only sit and watched. She felt sick to her stomach with the spinning of the room and cold, oh so cold, she could hardly feel her fingers or her toes anymore. Suddenly the hands and the eyes became one and a man with ugly green eyes appeared in front of her. He was dressed all in black from his head to his feet. His hair was black but his face was white as snow and his eyes green and neon, glowing in the dark. He smiled at her a bright, white, toothy smile. He called out to her in a deep hissing voice. Colours of fire swirled all around her, the man ever coming closer and closer to her. His hands fell upon her, touching her hair and her shoulders and he knelt down by her. She wanted to back away but the room spun so fast and she was frozen in place. The man wrapped his boney arms around her and brought his thin white lips close to hers. His eyes glowed in the darkness against his white skin. His lips met hers as he lifted her off the ground and into his arms. Her eyes filled with hot tears, her body was now limp in his arms. A sick taste filled her mouth from his lips. He smiled at her and whispered into her ear, "what a beautiful pity and sacrifice you are to the darkness. Once I have the bird of fire and life you will forever be a beautiful being of the darkness." Amelia could feel her consciousness fading away from her more and more as the sick taste spread into her mouth. Fighting the fading of her being she screamed out as loudly as she could trying to get someone's attention. No one came running. The man laughed and laughed as he carried her farther into the darkness. Her mind was getting cloudy, something that never happened because she always had so much control over her own mind but this was to much terror for her to handle she was filled with panic and anguish. She screamed once more.
The scream echoed in the darkness of the hallway as Amelia's eyes flew open, filled with panic and horror. She could still hear the scream in the hall and the mans voice in her ears. She moved her arms frantically as tears swelled in her eyes. Her legs would move, her arms would move, her mind was still clear and unbroken and yet the hairs on the back of her neck still stood on end and her mind was filled with the terrible laughing. It took a few moments for Amelia to realise where she was, when she did she noticed that Professor Snape was kneeling right in front of her. Amelia gasped in fear realising it was only a dream and that she had been caught out of her dormitory by Professor Snape. The only light in the dark passage was that of his wand as he looked at her, his face filled with concern.
"You were having a nightmare," he said as he reached out to help her up off the floor, "you are going to catch your death down hear in the cold," he said pulling her up and looking at her strangely.
Tears began to roll down Amelia's face again. Her cheeks were hot and red but her body was chilled through and through. She shivered as she looked fearfully up at Snape but she could not say a single word in her own defence.
"Amelia what happened?" he asked as concern and fear filled his face.
"I wanted to escape," Amelia sobbed, panic stricken as she began to look around the darkness felling disoriented. She shivered uncontrollably from the cold.
"Escape what?" Snape said taking her by the shoulders, "is there something in the castle? What are you afraid of?" he asked more worried now than before.
"The darkness, the magic, this world, this life," Amelia wasn't making any sense, she blurted out random things as the fear and the panic grew in her eyes. She reached out in absolute helplessness and fell into Snape. She wrapped her arms around his waist and sobbed into his chest, "no safety anywhere," cried to him as he could feel her whole body shaking.
Snape wrapped his arms around the pour, week, terrified, girl as he held her close to him and listen to her sobs, "you are safe in this castle, nothing can harm you here. Everything is alright you are safe," he hushed her softly, "you don't need to worry about anything Amelia, I am here to protect you. No one will let anything happen here."
"To many secrets," she sobbed, "to many lies. You're never really safe here," she said and looked up at him.
Her eyes pleaded for something that Snape could not understand. But he felt something change within him. He couldn't scold this child for her disobedience to the rules of the school. He felt too worried, too unsure for her. She needed him for something but he couldn't understand what. He seemed to be filled with pity and sympathy for this simple girl. He took her by the hand and, moving quickly, walked toward his class room. Upon arriving, with a wave of his wand, the lights in the room came one and a thick woolen blanket flew to his hand. He motioned for Amelia to take a seat in his desk chair as he wrapped the blanket around her and walked to the side of the room where his potions cabinet stood.
"Here," he said as he came back and place a glass of dark brown liquid in her hands, "don't worry, its only tea and a bit of the warming potion that we have studied in class. It should help to take the chill off and calm you down," he said as he pulled another chair over to her, "drink it slowly and tell me what happened." he sat silently looking at the girl. His eyes were softer than Amelia had ever seen before. He didn't look as menacing as he always did and concern was written all over his face.
"We know why Voldimort wants my mother," she said slowly, "we found out after she gave Dominic a clue and we went searching in the library, at least we think its why, and it really scared me that she would keep something like that secret. I mean, in my mind, it seems worse than..." she stopped herself from saying what she knew Snape had done.
He could tell that it was what was going to come out of her mouth, "than working for the darkness in the first place?"
"Yes," she sighed and looked at the floor.
"Don't worry, Amelia, I know you know and I know you don't trust me because of it," he said as he tried to smile at her and placing his hand under her chin and raising her eyes to his he said, "but I have told you nothing but the truth since the truth was made known."
"I believe you," she said as tears ran down her cheeks, "you seem to be the most honest person in this whole school."
"Why do you say that?" Snape asked feeling taken back by her comment.
"Because everyone keeps us so in the dark about everything, it doesn't matter that we are Occlumentic or not we are still lied to when the truth is involved," Amelia said while sipping her tea.
"Tell me then what you think is the secret of your mothers and I will tell you if you are right or if you are wrong," he said.
"Voldimort wants her and Fawkes to create a double wand like Dumbledore, to be stronger and to be able to beat Harry," Amelia whispered almost entirely, it seemed, to her tea.
"That is the reason," Snape said as he touched her hand, "but she is safe here at hogwarts."
"But it doesn't matter if she is safe or not," Amelia said angrily, "what matters is our lives and we really can't live them because of lies and secrets like this!" hot tears of anger rolled down her face, "this is nothing," she said as she grabbed his arm and rolled up his sleeve to show the snake on his arm, "compared to the secrets and the lies. This is nothing," she said again and cast images into his head that made him jump back, "compared to finding out why your entire family is dead and dying." she broke down and sobbed again, "what is safety really if no one knows what feels safe to the next person."
"You're right Amelia," Snape said as he pulled her into an embrace, "safety is nothing without trust."
Amelia sighed heavily, "and what is trust? Does anyone really know?"
"I don't think we do," he said.
"I can say that I trust my friends, my brother, but they are the ones to spy on me. I can say I trust my mother but she lies. The only person who hasn't lied to me and has been strict and truthful is you," she said.
Snape looked at her through changed eyes. His heart ached for this girls realisation of the cruelties of the world. He knew that if he was to change his temper toward her in their everyday student teacher relationship that it would be somewhat of a lie to her as he was not like that but he felt that he had to help this young girl to at least feel safe in this castle, "Amelia, is there anything else you would like to tell me?" he asked, "anything that you want to know that you think I am keeping from you or your friends. I want you to feel like you can trust me and that I might be able to make you feel safe in this place. But only if you want to do this."
Amelia could see a softness in this man that she was sure her mother had found long ago. It was a softness that Amelia had never even known from her father, when he was alive. She knew that he could tell her many things about the man that was after her mother and about the students that she work so closely with but she was afraid of any more truths tonight. Her body was tired and her mind was weak. "I think I would like to talk to you again, when I am more composed and my mind is clearer. Would that be possible?" she asked shyly.
"Anytime you need me," he said taking her hands, "I can't treat you any differently in class."
"I wouldn't want you to, it would be a lie," she said.
"But I can promise you that anything you need, if you need someone to talk to I will be here to listen," he said.
"Would tomorrow after potions be alright for a meeting Professor?" Amelia asked.
"I am free then, yes," he smiled.
"Alright, then I think I should get back to my dormitory and try to rest tonight," she said with a sigh, "I just hope I don't have any more nightmares tonight. Its strange, I never have them, this one was so real. But That's for another day."
"I will walk you back to Gryffindor tower, that way you will not be caught and punished by anyone else," he said as he took the glass and the blanket back from her.
"As for my punishment," she said, "how many points will you take from Gryffindor?" she asked.
"I think you have had enough mental and physical torment for one night," he smiled, "I wont take any points off but be warned if you are out of the dormitory after curfew again I will have to."
Amelia smiled and the walk back to Gryffindor tower was a silent one. When they arrived outside the tower Snape stopped Amelia again. He pulled a small cloudy sphere out of his pocket and handed it to her, "this was on the floor next to you when you were having your nightmare," he said placing it into her hands.
"What is it?" she asked.
"Its not yours?" he asked feeling worried.
"No I have never seen one before, perhaps it is something that Dumbledore should see," she said handing it back to Snape.
"We'll take it to him tomorrow after our meeting," Snape said with a smile.
"Tomorrow after noon is the Hogsmade trip I will have to leave our meeting and go right away to find Draco," she said, "would you take it to Dumbledore for me?" she asked.
"Of course," he smiled, "but why do you need to find Malfoy?" he asked as concern filled his face.
"I have been tutoring him in Transfigurations and promised to spend the day with him in Hogsmade, but we are only friends don't worry," she smiled and giggled.
He shook his head and laughed too, "just be careful around him, his family is evil right down to their roots," he said.
"I will be," Amelia smiled and turned toward the entrance of the common room. The door opened at the sound of the password and she walked inside.
Snape waited until Amelia was well on her way inside before he left her. He was filled with a sense of worry for this pour girl and was anxious to know what else she had to tell him. She had made him realise just how precious the truth and trust can be and just how rare it really was to find. He passed the sphere over in his hands and put it back in his pocket. She was right it would have to wait till tomorrow, he was feeling quite tired himself after the strange meeting in the darkness of the dungeon.