A Moment in Time
DISCLAIMER: Harry Potter (and associated characters, likenesses, concepts, etc.) belongs to J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury Publishing, Scholastic, Inc. AOL/Time Warner, Inc., among others. I make no claim, written or implied, upon Harry Potter. No money is being made and no infringement or disrespect to the creators / copyright holders is intended.
Warning: This story will contain slash (ie. male/male relationships) and mpreg, although neither will be graphic.
A/N: This story was inspired by the many wonderful stories that I have read and enjoyed here at fan fiction and any similarities to existing stories is not intended. This story is AU, meaning that the events that occurred in the OOTP have not been taken into account and I am in no means suggesting the material described in this story should be considered as a direct interpretation of cannon. Also, I am American so I apologize in advance for any Americanisms.
Chapter Twenty Six - The Long Road
Gradually, Harry became aware of his surroundings. There appeared to be voices coming from all around him; also he felt a slight discomfort in his left arm, almost as though something sharp was pressing against it. In the background, he could hear the low repetitive beeping noises of medical monitors and the strong smell of disinfectant that he associated immediately with the school's hospital wing. Harry was confused, was he back at Hogwarts?
Harry tried to lift his arm, to move it away from whatever was irritating it, but found that he didn't have the strength to move at all. With a slight groan, Harry gave up in defeat.
At that slight noise, the room fell strangely silent. Conversation stopped, as all eyes turned towards the dark haired figure that had been lying so still for such a long time on the bed. Harry had remained unconscious for over a week, and rarely did Draco leave his mate's side; afraid that there would be some small change in Harry's condition and that he wouldn't be there for it. Only when threatened with a strong hex from Nicole, Severus or Sirius would Draco leave, and even then, it was only for a short break to shower and clean up before returning immediately to be with Harry. Sirius and Nicole were not much better, only leaving for short spells as well.
Harry had many visitors during the week following the ambush and Albus swore that there was a castle room near the owlery completely filled with get-well cards and gifts sent from all over for Harry when he was strong enough. Draco refused to leave Harry alone, even at night, so Madame Pomfrey gave up her many arguments and allowed Draco to remain in the bed beside Harry, as long as he agreed to get some rest each night.
It had taken quite a while for Harry's magic to stabilize after both the battle and then losing the baby. There had even been a couple of times during the past week when it looked like Harry's magic might become so unstable that it could possibly do irreparable harm to him or even, Merlin forbid, kill him. Needless to say, it was a very stressful week for everyone.
Currently Sirius, Nicole, Severus, Remus and Draco were eating their evening meal at a small table that had been set up for them in the infirmary. Since Harry's fall and subsequent miscarriage, Draco refused to eat unless it was in the hospital ward; where he could continue to monitor Harry's condition. He and Sirius had taken almost every meal for the past week at this small table and Severus and Remus had gotten into the habit of joining them for dinner. Occasionally, Nicole would also join them when she wasn't with the twins and her duties in the hospital wing permitted it. Now, however, everyone was solely focused on Harry; each praying that the young man would finally wake up and rejoin them.
Draco heard the groan and his head automatically swiveled to watch Harry. The noise had been so soft that Draco wasn't even sure if he had heard it or if it had only been a product of his wishful imagination. But then sure enough, he heard it again. And he wasn't the only one that had heard it, as Sirius and Nicole both bolted from their chairs and raced over to Harry's bedside.
Draco quickly made his way over to Harry and gently picked up his partner's hand. Using his other hand to brush Harry's bangs off his forehead, Draco leaned down and in a low voice began to plead once more with his unconscious lover. "Come on Leo, you can do this…I really need for you to wake up. Do you think you can do that for me? It's been so long since I saw those beautiful green eyes of yours, how about opening your eyes so that I can see if they are truly as green as I remember them."
Draco gasped in surprise as he felt a slight pressure on his hand. For the first time since that tragic night, Harry had responded; he had squeezed his hand. It wasn't much, but at least Draco knew that Harry heard him and that he knew he was there with him. Severus saw the look on Draco's face and realizing what was happening went to notify Poppy and Albus that Harry was finally showing signs of waking up.
"That's right Leo, I want you to squeeze my hand again if you can hear me. Do you think you can do that?" Draco waited a few tense moments before he once more felt a small squeeze. Draco looked up into the worried faces of Nicole, Harry's Godfather, and Sirius' best friend, his face breaking into a tentative smile. "He heard me. He squeezed my hand."
Sirius looked like he was about to cry when Remus drew the taller man against him in a friendly hug. "Harry is going to wake up soon and then everything will be fine. You just wait and see," Remus reassured Sirius as Sirius struggled to get control of his emotions.
Harry heard voices, familiar voices talking to him. They sounded worried. Gathering what little strength that he had Harry made another attempted to move, this time to try to open his eyes. Harry moaned loudly and quickly shut his eyes as the light burned painfully as it pulsed directly into his skull.
Draco couldn't believe what he was seeing as Harry's lashes started to flutter and then after so many hours of waiting and praying, Harry opened his eyes. The beautiful sight didn't last long as Harry cried out in distress and once more closed his eyes. "Someone, dim the lights; they are bothering him", Draco directed.
Just then the Headmaster and Madame Pomfrey entered the Hospital Ward, followed quickly by Severus. Poppy watched as Nicole finished taking Harry's vitals as Draco filled the medi-witch in on what had been happening with Harry's condition. Draco reached out and gently wiped away a tear that had been squeezed out of one of Harry's eyes and had started to roll down his cheek. "Leo, the bright lights are gone, I promise. Please wake up for me."
Harry heard the solemn promise and tentatively opened his eyes again. This time the room was bathed in the cool shadows of either early morning or late evening. Harry couldn't tell which it was though. As soon as his vision cleared the first image that he saw was one of a very tired, very much relieved, Draco Malfoy. A feeling of being where he belonged flooded through him as he smiled up at his mate who started to plant kisses all over Harry's face.
"Oh Merlin Harry, Oh thank Merlin," Draco kept repeating over and over as he continued to kiss Harry. Harry smiled and tried to reach up to embrace his lover but only managed to move his arm slightly before it fell back onto the mattress and Harry once more groaned this time with exhaustion.
Poppy gently started to question the raven-haired man, "Harry, are you in any pain?" Harry nodded slowly and the witch injected a potion into his IV tube. "That potion will help with the pain. Now do you know where you are?" Again, Harry nodded. "Okay Harry, I know that you have lots of questions, but I'm afraid that you're just not strong enough right now for that. I need to you to go back to sleep so I'm also going to give you a dreamless sleep potion which will let you sleep for about another 12 hours, when you wake up I am hopeful that you'll be feeling a little better."
Harry turned his attention from the witch and noticed for the first time that Sirius, Remus, Severus, and Dumbledore were also in the room. Harry was shocked by their worn and haggard appearances and smiled slightly in greeting hoping to reassure them all of his well being. As he felt the sleeping potion start to take effect, Harry gathered his remaining energy and slowly raised his hand to his soul mate. "Dray…"
Draco watched as the medi-witches examined Harry and injected various potions into the plastic tube that fed the liquids into him via his arm. He felt almost in a fog as relief washed over him now that Harry had woken and Draco was assured that Harry would eventually recover. Suddenly he heard Harry croak out one word, "Dray," and raise his hand toward him. Knowing that the need for physical contact was mutual Draco quickly took Harry's offered hand and raised it to his lips. Draco felt a slight pressure pulling him towards the bed. Taking the invitation Draco lay down beside Harry taking the slightly smaller man into his arms. "Stay," the word was whispered against his chest.
"Forever my love. I'll stay with you forever."
The next time that Harry woke he was surrounded by warmth. He shifted slightly as he looked up and emerald green eyes met slate gray. Harry was disturbed when he saw that Draco had been crying. Harry tentatively reached up and touched the other man's cheek. "Why?"
Harry's voice sounded more like a croak, as his throat was so dry. Identifying Harry's problem, Draco reached over and poured him a glass of ice cold water from a nearby pitcher. This also served as a small distraction to allow Draco to pull himself together a bit before answering Harry's one word question.
Gratefully accepting the water, Harry continued to wait patiently for Draco to answer him as he took a few tentative sips. The cool water felt to wonderful as it trickled down his parched throat.
"Bloody Hell Harry, do you have any idea what I've been through the last week or so? What it's been like for me since you were hurt?" Draco paused and looked away seemly unable to continue. Taking a deep breath, Draco turned back to Harry. "When I woke up this morning, and I felt you in my arms I was afraid that I was dreaming; that this wasn't real. Until just a few moments ago, I truly didn't believe that I would even be able to hold you in my arms again. I've missed you so damn much. Don't ever do that to me again, do you understand?"
"Never, Dray, I would never leave you if I had a choice."
"I know love. Now that I've got you back among the living, don't think that I'm going to let you alone for a second."
Harry just smiled and then got a serious look on his face. "I love you."
Tears once more filled Draco eyes turning them into molten silver. "I love you too."
After placing a chaste kiss on Harry's lips, Draco got up out of bed. At Harry's questioning glance, Draco explained that everyone would know Harry was awake now and that they would most likely be getting visitors. Draco placed several pillows at the head of the bed and reached down to help Harry sit up.
As Harry struggled to sit up he felt a sharp pain in his lower abdomen. Taking a deep breath and blowing some of the pain away, Harry waited for the stabbing feeling to dissipate somewhat before trying to figure out what was going on. The last thing he remembered was the ambush and getting hit with those curses as he was making his get away. But even if he had fallen from his broom, which Harry was pretty sure he had done, he couldn't figure out where this pain in his lower half was coming from. Tentatively, he reached down with his right hand and to find the source of his pain.
Draco held his breath as Harry softly cried out from the unexpected pain when he tried to sit up. Reaching behind Harry, he helped support the raven haired man's weight, in an attempt to ease some of the pressure of his newly re-healed incision. Draco dreaded this moment almost as much as he wished so desperately for it. He knew that he would be the one that would tell Harry about the miscarriage, he just didn't expect it to be this soon after he had woken up.
Draco knew Harry's reasons for keeping the boys true parentage a secret had been valid, but in some ways Draco was very much relived now that certain people knew that he was Matthew and Evan's other biological parent. It was so hard to try to hide how much he loved those two little boys and how very proud he was of them. Deep down, he was most anxious for this war to end so that he and Harry and the boys would finally officially declare themselves a true family. Ever since finding out about his sons, they had quickly become his main reason for fighting.
Not able to prevent this unavoidable discovery, Draco steeled himself and waited for the inevitable question.
Harry's eyes narrowed when he felt the tender skin along his newly raised scar left from the twin's birth. "Dray?"
"Yes Harry?" Draco knew exactly what Harry was asking but he paused, stalling to give himself a few more moments. He needed to make sure that he could get his emotions under control so that he could be there for Harry when he found out about their tragic loss. His focus had to be solely on Harry and not on himself.
"What happened to me after I fell? Why is my abdomen so sore? Did I have some internal injuries from the fall?" Harry was confused, the only time he had felt this type of lingering pain was after he had the Caesarian section when the boys were born.
Draco sat down beside Harry, knowing that this was one conversation that they needed to have face to face. Reaching over to his dark haired lover, Draco tenderly ran his hands through the tousled hair. "Harry," Draco began slowly. "Do you remember the attack?"
Confused at the concern and pain he saw in Draco's silver eyes, Harry nodded.
"After you were hit repeatedly with the stunning curse, you fell about sixty five feet."
Again Harry nodded, he had assumed as much.
"We had already started our return to Hogwarts when we realized you weren't with us. As soon as we noticed you weren't there, we turned around and went back to help you, but we didn't get there fast enough and I watched you fall. It was one of the scariest moments in my life."
Draco shushed Harry when it looked like he was going to respond to Draco's comment. "I say one of the scariest because the worst moment hadn't happened at that point yet. We were able to keep the Death Eater's away from you, until reinforcements arrived. Hell, Dumbledore himself came out of the castle when he realized that you were in such serious danger." Draco sat back in the chair and ran a hand through his own hair.
Harry tried to smile but it ended up a grimace as more pain flooded through him, everyone knew that Dumbledore never left the castle anymore; he was far too valuable, as he was instrumental in Hogwarts continued protection. His main responsibility in times of battle rested solely on protecting the castle and monitoring and maintaining the wards that surrounded it and kept their loved ones safe.
"With the extra help, we were able to chase the rest of the Death Eaters away, including Voldemort. He wasn't too happy about leaving you behind, I might add. Once they were gone, I landed and ran over to where you were." Draco's voice cracked as he remembered the horrific site of Harry's twisted body lying there covered in blood and that moment when he didn't know if he was still alive or not.
"You were a real mess, Leo. There was blood everywhere. I didn't even know at first if…if…" Draco's voice cracked again and Harry carefully reached over and grabbed Draco's hand.
"Its alright Dray, I'm here and I'm fine, what ever you have to tell me we'll get through it together." Harry felt awful when he realized just how much Draco had suffered.
"It wasn't until we got you back to Hogwarts and realized that you were still bleeding that Nicole figured out what was happening to you." Draco's voice was hoarse and broken.
"Harry love, you had a miscarriage." There, he said it. Draco closely watched for Harry's reaction. At first Draco wondered if Harry had even heard him, as the raven-haired man, just sat there propped up in bed. Then slowly Draco saw realization dawn as Harry's eyes got so wide and, if possible, his nearly translucent skin got even paler.
"W-W-What?"
Draco didn't answer him and just watched as Harry tried to comprehend the meaning of what he had just learned. A part of Harry heard the words but just couldn't fathom what exactly they meant, their meaning far too hideous to comprehend.
"But that's not possible. I'd have to be pregnant to have a miscarriage, and I wasn't. I would have known if I was pregnant. I wasn't. You have to be wrong." Harry's pleading voice had reached a desperate pitch by the end of his rant. "It's not true; please tell me it's not true. Oh God, tell me it's not true."
Knowing that there were no words that could comfort his partner, Draco stood up and slowly pulled Harry into his strong arms, worried as much for this latest devastating blow to his spirit as his was for the remnants of the physical wounds on his slowly mending body. Holding on to each other for dear life, the two men shared a grief only known to those that had been forced an endure a pain beyond any pain imaginable; a pain worse than the strongest Cruciatus curse; a pain only known to those who had lost a child.
A short time later when their tears had been exhausted, Draco felt that maybe Harry was ready to talk about what happened. Sure, this was only their first round of tears, there would certainly be many others, but Draco knew that in order for Harry to start to heal from this last vicious turn of events that was dealt to them that they needed to start coming to terms with it.
Draco felt bad about bringing the topic up again, when Harry raised his clearly exhausted and pain filled eyes. Draco had only seen pain like that in someone's eyes when as a Death Eater he was forced to participate in torturing and killing of families, either muggle or wizard it didn't matter, the parents' all looked like Harry looked now as they watched their children die.
"I didn't know Draco, I swear I didn't. If I had known then I would have done things so much differently." Harry soft voice was barely recognizable.
"Harry, love, it's okay, I didn't suspect a thing either and nor did Nicole. You know how hard it is to detect a wizard pregnancy, don't you dare start blaming yourself for this." Draco's heart was breaking again as he watched Harry struggle; he loved this man so very much.
"How far?"
Draco gently pressed his lips to Harry's forehead before answering. "Nicole said she thought somewhere around fourteen weeks."
"So it would have been conceived only a month or so after we moved back here."
Draco nodded affirming Harry's calculation.
"Do you know…?" Harry's voice broke and he couldn't bring himself to finish the question.
Knowing exactly what Harry wanted to know, Draco answered him anyway. "No Harry, it was too early, Nicole couldn't tell what the sex was." The spell usually used to determine the sex of a baby could be performed as early as a day after conception, but as the spell read the baby's magical aura, the spell couldn't work an a deceased fetus.
For a while neither man said anything else, they just sat their both caught up in their own thoughts of what might have been if things had happened differently.
Finally, Harry whispered, "I would have loved to have had more children with you. I always thought that it would be neat to have a daughter, although I wouldn't care if we could only have a slew of boys, as long as they were ours."
Momentarily shuddering as with Harry's words 'a slew of boys', Draco got the visual image of Harry and himself with the twins and about six other boys all crammed into a small house Weasley style. But Draco shook it off knowing that even if they had wanted more children now, that according to Nicole, it wasn't likely.
Harry looked up when he felt Draco mentally pull away from his again, almost like he was preparing to give him even more bad news. "What is it Dray, did something else happen?"
Wanting to reassure his mate, Draco quickly added, "No Harry, nothing else happened, everyone else is fine. It's just that after your surgery, Nicole took me aside and told me about your condition." Draco paused; he hated how all the words in the English vocabulary seemed to escape him at this critical moment. "You see Harry, you were hurt pretty bad, it's truly a wonder that you even survived at all with the fall and then the miscarriage. But the truth is Leo, the odds are that we will not be able to have any more children, there was just too much damage. I'm sorry, luv."
Harry started to shake as even more tears started to fall as he realized the extent of the harm that hideous monster was responsible for. Not only had Voldemort been caused the death of the child that neither he nor Draco had even gotten the chance to acknowledge. But, he had also taken away any chance of them having more children.
Harry's shaking increased as his anger grew. When Harry's eyes seemed to practically glow and the energy level in the air increased to the point where Harry's magic was starting to physically manifest itself by making the lights burn brighter and the air around them start to swirl, Draco knew that he had to do something soon or Harry would loose complete control. This was a very dangerous situation with a wizard of Harry's caliber, especially now, as it was still too soon for Harry to be performing any sort of magic having just awakened from his coma.
"Leo, you have got to calm down, please Leo, if you continue this way you are only going to hurt yourself. Please calm down. I'd really prefer it if you didn't blow us up right now."
Harry could feel his fragile control starting to slip and did his best to concentrate on keeping it together. His magic was so powerful now that if he lost complete control over it, it could seriously do some damage, and no matter what, Harry didn't want any more innocent people to suffer.
Draco sighed in relief as he felt the power levels in the surrounding air start to fall back to more normal levels. Although his relief was only short lived, when Harry turned towards him again and he saw that Harry's eyes were still strangely iridescent.
"This ends now Draco." For being as weak as he had been only moments before Harry's voice was surprisingly strong and determined. "I mean it Dray; he is going down and soon. I've had enough of this shit, and I refuse to put up with it any longer." Harry's voice if anything grew even stronger and more powerful. "That bastard murdered our baby before it even had a chance to draw its first breath. He dies; he dies soon and by my hand."
Knowing that there was very little that he could say at this point, Draco kissed his mate softly on his lips. This war had taken one too many casualties. Voldemort had unknowingly made the second biggest mistake of his Dark Lord reign when he cast that stunning spell on Harry. His first, of course, being his misguided attack on the Potters that fateful Halloween night that put all the other events in motion. Harry would see him finished now; of that Draco had no doubt, and Draco planned on being with him every step of the way.
So caught up in the emotional whirlwind that was taking place in the private hospital room, neither Draco nor Harry were aware that their intensely private conversation was being observed by three pairs of eyes.
Draco had been right, there were many people anxious to visit with Harry to reassure themselves that he was indeed on the road to recovery. Unfortunately, some of them just now realized how long of a road that really was going to be. By far, the oldest pair in the lot made sure that his companions didn't say anything until they were safely out of earshot and back in his office.
As soon as the gargoyle was back in place, Ron Weasley couldn't contain himself anymore. "What the hell was all that about? I thought Harry just had some internal injuries from his fall, why were they talking about a miscarriage?"
Her husband's comments quickly brought Hermione out of her stupor. "But of course, it all makes sense now; I don't know why I didn't think of it before."
"Yes, it does answer a lot of questions, doesn't it Hermione? And to think the answer was so obvious all this time, but we just weren't prepared to look for it." Albus' eyes were twinkling at full force as he watched realization slowly dawn on Harry's former best friends' faces.
Seeing that Ron wasn't getting to the proper conclusion fast enough, Hermione decided to help him along. "Just think about it Ron, think about it with an open mind. Who do Harry's sons' look like?"
"They look like Harry," Ron replied stubbornly.
"Fine, discount their hair, and Matthew's green eyes, isn't there anyone else that they resemble? Granted the other resemblance is subtler, but it's still there if you look for it. Think about the way their faces are shaped and how their noses turn up just a tad on the end, and then if you need anymore help, think about Evan's eyes. Sure the shape of his eyes are the same as Harry's and his brother, but the color…." Hermione was getting frustrated, that old muggle saying about being able to lead a horse to water, but not being able to make him drink never seemed more true than right now. Sure, she knew that Ron wasn't always that fastest to catch on to something, but once he did, he was a great strategic thinker. His tireless behind the scenes hard work had helped save hundreds of lives since this war had started.
Screwing his face up with his concentration, Ron started to put the clues together. Picturing Evan Potter as he had last seen the child in his mind, he slowly started to concentrate on his cute face. Taking away Harry's messy black hair, Ron studied the child's features. The chin looked familiar, it wasn't Harry's but he knew that he had seen it somewhere before. The sense of familiarity increased as Ron worked his way up the child's face. Suddenly, the answer hit him as he stared into a pair of gray eyes, those eyes could only belong to a Malfoy.
Hermione knew the moment that Ron had made the connection, as he breathing started to become slightly erratic. "Breathe Ron, breathe. It's okay; it really doesn't change anything. You knew that they were romantically involved before. Harry even told you that he loved him, so just settle down."
Concentrating on his breathing Ron finally managed to gasp out, "Hell, its one thing to be sleeping with him, but he actually had his children. Harry is a man and he gave birth to Malfoy's offspring. Harry and Malfoy…." He was so upset, Ron couldn't continue.
Ron's reaction sparked an old feeling of protectiveness when it came to Harry. "Now you listen to me, Ronald Weasley. I will not have you making any trouble for Harry and his family. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?" There was no mistaking the repercussions should Ron choose not to obey.
"Harry and Draco have both been dealt with a tragic event, and we have to do everything to support them."
At Ron's incredulous look, Hermione couldn't stop herself from adding, "Yes, we have to support Malfoy too. Harry and Draco would never had been able to have children in the first place if they weren't soul mates, so regardless how you or anyone else may feel about the matter, they are together and they will be together for the rest of their lives. I, for one, will make sure that that life is as long and as happy as it can possibly be given the circumstances."
"They're soul mates?"
"Yes Ron, they are soul mates," Hermione said, pausing to give him her 'don't you ever read' glare before continuing. "Male pregnancies are extremely rare and can only happen between two very powerful wizards who happen to by bound via a connection inherent in their very souls."
"Yes indeed Hermione, you are correct as usual." Albus chuckled; the Weasleys were always a source of entertainment. "But for now, I suggest that we keep Harry's and Draco's secret. They need time to grieve for their loss. And as I'm sure you both realize that if this new information got out, it could prove to be even more dangerous to their family. If people found out about Harry having successfully carrying not one but two children to term, well, this additionally indication of his tremendous power could make people start to fear him again. That is something that we can not afford, not now when we are so close to the end."
Dumbledore allowed the Weasley's to reflect a little more on the conversation that they had just overheard before adding, "And I believe that the end is near. Soon this will all be just one more segment taught in some history class."
Harry was surprised to see that at least six hours had past before he woke up again. This time he was met with delicious smells of food. Madame Pomfrey assured him that as soon as he was able to eat on his own that she would remove the IV tube that was currently supplying him nutrients.
Once more, Draco assisted Harry in sitting up in bed and helped Harry eat his meal. It wasn't much, just some chicken noodle soup, green beans and a roll with butter and milk but to Harry it was wonderful. Unfortunately, after not eating for so long, due to his healing coma, his stomach wasn't able to handle too much and Harry found it a struggle to finish even half of his food. Harry lay back against his pillows after he had finished, surprised at how tired he was just from eating part of his small lunch.
Poppy wasn't too impressed with Harry's progress but agreed to remove the I.V. tube later that evening if Harry ate another meal at least as big as the first one before he went to sleep that night. Shortly after the witch left, Nicole and Sirius came to visit.
Sirius bounded in disguised as Snuffles and jumped up onto Harry's bed and settled himself between the two men. Harry still feeling extremely low but appreciating Sirius' efforts managed a weak smile as Snuffle's started to lick his face, not to be out done Draco quickly assumed his animagus form and proceeded to compete with Sirius at licking Harry's face. "Enough, enough..." Harry managed to gasp. "It is bad enough being assaulted by one dog but two…yuck."
Draco looked insulted at being called a dog and Harry had a hard time being firm as he looked into the soulful brown eyes of the black dog and the soft gray eyes of the wolf. Seeing as he had greeted Harry sufficiently, Snuffles jumped down off of the bed and transformed back into his human form. Draco meanwhile decided to stay in his wolf form and curled up along side Harry protectively.
Both Nicole and Sirius were glad to see Harry looking much improved. The two of them sat down in the chairs beside Harry's bed and caught Harry up on what was happening while he had been unconscious, careful to keep from mentioning the miscarriage. Before the conversation had progressed very far, Severus and Remus, who also stopped in to make sure Harry was recovering properly, joined them.
"So when do you think I'll be able to get out of here and back to my own rooms?" Harry questioned, already tired of the plain white surroundings and missing his children something fierce. He knew deep down that he wasn't nearly recovered enough to be allowed to leave but he thought he'd ask anyway.
"Well Harry, I know how much you hate being here in the hospital, but the truth is that when we brought you back here to Hogwarts, well…I guess there is no easy way to say it," Sirius looked over to Nicole for assistance. Nicole nodded her encouragement. "Well…you kinda died." Sirius managed to spit this last bit out as he watched Harry carefully trying to gauge his reaction. Harry, however, didn't look surprised or concerned and merely reached over to scratch behind Draco's ears as he let out a mournful howl to express what he thought about that situation. "I think that everyone is going to take it slow to make sure that you are fully recovered and that there are no lingering side affects before you are released. I just have this feeling that you might be making this place your home for awhile yet." No one wanted to even begin to broach the subject of his miscarriage and the recovery time that his body needed to get back to normal after that trauma. Again, as there was so little known about male pregnancy and what Harry may need to recover physically as well as magically from the miscarriage; they knew that they were not going to take any chances.
"Harry, I couldn't help but notice that you didn't seem surprised when Sirius mentioned the state you were in when we brought you back here," Remus stated hesitantly. His relationship with Harry was progressing slowly, although they were no where near as close as they once had been. Remus was grateful to both Sirius and Severus for including him in intimate family gatherings that allowed Remus to get reacquainted with Harry and for Harry to get used to Remus' presence in his life once more. Spending time with Prong's Grandchildren was just an extra sweet bonus.
Harry studied the solemn man in front of him. He knew that Remus was truly sorry for what happened back when Harry was in school here and while he didn't completely forgive the man, he did sort of understand why he placed his trust in Dumbledore. Hell, everyone still did for the most part. But remembering his promise to his parents, he knew that he needed to come to terms with Remus' betrayal and if possible, forgive the man. "Well you see, there is something that I wanted to talk with both of you about." Harry felt completely unsure how to proceed with delivering the messages from his parents. "But first I want you both to promise me that you won't get upset and that you'll let me finish what I have to say before you ask me any questions."
Curious at what Sirius' Godson had to tell them that would make him extract this sort of promise, both men readily agreed.
"After I fell," Harry was interrupted by a howl. "If you can't stay quiet, you'll just have to leave until I finish this." Properly chastised, the wolf stopped howling and laid his head on Harry's lap. "As I was saying, after I fell and hit the ground I think I lost consciousness for awhile. When I came to, I could feel this terrible pain and felt myself losing a lot of blood, I just knew that I wasn't going to make it. Everything around me was black as I lost consciousness again, and then out of nowhere came this bright light. The light was warm and inviting and I was drawn towards it. As I came closer to the light, I saw that there were people waiting for me there. There were lots of people who I had never met before; I guess they were my grandparents and other family. But most importantly, my mum and dad were there." Sirius let out a gasp and quickly grabbed onto Remus' hand for support.
"They explained to me that I had died but that you all were doing everything that you could to bring me back. I didn't get to spend a lot of time with them, but we did get to visit for a little bit. Before I was sent back though, they asked me to do something for them. They wanted me to tell you, Sirius, to stop taking the blame for their deaths. They don't blame you and they hate seeing you blame yourself. Remus, they want you to start taking better care of yourself. They forgive you for not believing in me and for not helping me when I was sent to prison." Harry paused, he was really too tired to be having this emotional discussion right now, on top of everything else. "Although my Dad did say that he wanted to have a little talk with you at some future point in time."
Both Sirius and Remus were staring at Harry in disbelief. "Finally, my mum wanted me to tell you that 'Lily sends her love to the mangy mutt and the lovable wolf.' I just wanted you both to know how much you still mean to them." Harry's face was pale with the strain of talking so much and his voice was slowly fading to a soft whisper.
Remus was gripping Sirius' hand so hard he was liable to crush some of the smaller bones as tears streamed down his face. "But…how?"
"Oh Merlin…Harry are you sure that they said all that?" Sirius questioned looking at Harry as if his answer could mean the end of the world.
Having practically no energy left, Harry could only bring himself to nod.
"Harry did your parents have any other messages?" came the Headmaster's voice as he walked over to the bed. Harry hadn't even realized that he had come into the ward until he had spoken.
"As a matter of fact yes." Harry looked over at the old man thinking about what his father had said about the dangers of believing your own press. "They were very unhappy that you sent me to live with the Dursleys while growing up." Harry returned his attention to the gray wolf on his bed. "We also talked about my relationship with Draco and they told me that they approved and that they wanted us to take care of each other and take care of Matthew and Evan." Draco the wolf licked Harry's hand to show his appreciation and support. "My Dad asked me about quidditch." At this, everyone in the room chuckled. "He also told me that Cedric's death wasn't my fault, that Cedric didn't blame me. Finally they gave me some advice and asked me to do something for them, that I promised I would try to do. Then, they told me that they were proud of me and that they loved me." Harry paused as he smiled a small smile that was filled with sadness. "It was the only time that I can ever remember hearing them say that."
With a small pop, Harry found himself wrapped tightly in Draco's arms. Very softly, Harry added, "It was probably one of the best memories that I have." Knowing that only emotional momentum had kept Harry talking so long in his weakened state, Draco gently laid the other man back down on his bed.
Taking the hint, most people left the pair alone as they went off to discuss this latest unexpected turn of events. With another tight hug, Sirius straightened up and with a final smile he turned to leave the room. As he approached the doorway, he had to repress a chuckle as he heard Harry sleepily exclaim, "Hey does anyone know what happened to my broom?"
Harry kept his eye's closed and pretended to be asleep as he heard the soft shuffle of footfalls that could only be his sons. He was very anxious for their visit as Poppy had made him wait until he was feeling stronger before allowing the little ones into the hospital wing for a short visit. Finally, Draco convinced the older medic that the boys desperately missed their daddy and needed to see him face to face to reassure themselves that he was indeed alright and would be coming home to them soon. Like most others, Poppy didn't stand a chance against the Malfoy charm, and soon found herself helping to arrange the visit personally.
As much as it pained him to realize that he and Draco may never have any more children, it only made him feel more grateful for the two beautiful ones that they already did have. He missed Matthew and Evan dreadfully and couldn't wait until he was able to hold them in his arms again.
Harry tried not to smile, as he pretended to be asleep when he heard Evan's high pitched voice say in an exaggerated whisper, "Shhhh…Daddy's sleeping."
"I know, dummy." Harry frowned when he heard his other son's retort. People who thought that the two's were 'terrible' must not have raised a three-year-old. The threes were every bit as trying as the twos were, if not more so.
"Matthew, what did I tell you about calling people names?" Draco gently reprimanded his son. Harry was having a really hard time now trying not to give away the fact that he was listening intently to their conversation. As much as he loved Draco before, he found that 'parental Draco' was completely irresistible. Harry knew that Draco had his doubts about what kind of a father he would be, but in all honestly, Draco took to being a parent with a naturalness that surprised even himself. Very simply, Draco was a great father.
"You said not to call anyone a name when someone might hear you."
Harry couldn't help it, he let out a gasp at the utter nonsense that Draco had been filling their sons' heads with. "You told him what?"
Raising both of his eyebrows in a classic Malfoy way, Draco grinned at his lover as he summoned two smaller chairs to Harry's bed side for the boys to sit in. "So you were awake after all."
Not wanting to sit in the chair, Evan climbed up on top of Harry's bed, giving his daddy a big hug and kiss. "Missed you, Daddy."
Harry blinked rapidly to clear the tears that came immediately to his eyes at his young son's words. "Missed you too, Sweetheart."
Not to be outdone by his twin, Matthew pushed his brother out of the way so that he could get his hug and kiss as well. "I missed you more Daddy."
After giving his green eyed son a hug and kiss, Harry moved over to make room for both of his boys, so that they could all fit comfortably on the small twin bed. "I missed you too, Matty. I missed you boys even more than I missed chocolate, if you can believe that."
The twins started to giggle, it was a long running joke that while in California whenever Harry disguised as Emrys Kingston traveled away from them overnight that as soon as he got home he would tell them that he missed them, but not as much as he missed chocolate. Chocolate was Harry's comfort food, and according to him should be served as a main course at every meal. Draco slowly shook his head as he wished he had a galleon for every time he heard Harry say that 'a meal without something chocolate was woefully incomplete'.
Draco smiled in relief as the cluster of dark hair on the bed; the boys were working wonders on Harry's mentality. After being told about the miscarriage, Harry had slumped into a mild depression and Draco was getting worried that his mental state would interfere with his physical recovery. The pain of losing a child will never go away, of that Draco had no doubt, but he hoped that given time and the love of their sons that the loss would become more bearable.
Taking Harry up on the invitation in his eyes, Draco moved to join his family on the magically enlarged bed.
Nicole entered the quiet infirmary and made her way toward the far end of the wing where the few private rooms were located. Shifting the heavy tray that she was carrying from both hands to her right, she slowly opened the door to Harry's room.
Silently crossing the room, Nicole sat the tray laden with Harry's lunch down on a small bedside table before allowing herself the luxury of looking around. Warmth flooded through her as she watched the family curled up asleep in a large ball in Harry's bed, just content to be together again.
She had been astounded all those nights ago when she realized that Harry was indeed miscarrying. Never had a male been able to get pregnant a second time. But then again, never had one delivered twins before either. She had never even considered the possibility of Harry and Draco having more children and based on their reactions when they too realized what had happened, they hadn't either. Maybe the reason it had never happened before was because so few wizards were even capable of conception in the first place, and of the handful that had managed that feat, half of them had died in the process.
Nicole knew that it would take her a long time to get over the terror that had filled her at the sight of her best friend lying so still and covered in his own blood. She was intensely grateful to whatever deity had permitted Harry to return to them, suspecting that Harry would have died with out some sort of divine intervention. She couldn't even consider what would have happened if they had lost him; the thought was just too horrendous to even contemplate.
She managed to steal some private time with her friend every chance she had, which wasn't many, seeing how Draco seldom left him alone. But on one of her night shifts when Harry was feeling particularly rested after sleeping most of the day, they were able to have a good 'ole heart to heart. It had felt good being able to just sit there with Harry, one on one and just pour out all their pain and anger. She had missed the closeness that they had shared while living in California. After many tears and hugs, they both started to feel a little better and knew that no matter what fate had in store for them that they would always be there for each other.
The three black heads joined together on the small mountain of pillows by the silvery blonde head was adorable to watch. Nicole was eternally grateful for Draco's presence in their lives. He had truly been a pillar of strength so far during Harry's recovery, and the children just loved him to pieces. Anyone who knew Harry from before could always tell that something was missing, and the first time she had seen Harry and Draco together it was so easy to see that that missing piece had been Draco. They completed each other.
On one hand, she hated to have to interrupt their bonding, but on the other she knew how important it was for Harry to eat his lunch. The IV tubes had only just recently been removed, and Poppy has threatened her patient with their return if his appetite didn't improve.
"Hey guys, it's time to wake up…Daddy needs to eat his lunch and I need to get you two off to school."
Just as she suspected, Draco was the only one to even stir at her first attempt to wake the Potters up. She had concluded long ago that being extremely difficult to wake up must run in the Potter genes.
Not the least bit taken aback by the blonde's protective glare, Nicole reached over to where the twins where nestled in between their parents and started to give them a gentle shake. Normally, she would wake them up with tickles, but she didn't want them accidentally kicking Harry near his incision site.
Matthew raised his sleepy eyes to his caregiver. "Lunch? Chicken nuggets?" he managed to ask in between yawns.
"Come on sleepy heads, let's get up so your daddy can eat and I'll take you to the Great Hall for lunch, promise." Nicole grinned as she said the magic words. Both boys were fascinated with the Great Hall and used any opportunity to manipulate it so that they got to visit there, especially at meal time.
Nicole's grin faded a little when she saw Evan start to stir. If anyone needed sleep almost as much as Harry did, it was that little man. He was still being plagued with terrible nightmares, which only seemed to get worse since his daddy was hurt and unable to get him back to sleep. The dark circles that were starting to form around the toddler's eyes were very troublesome.
Reaching over Harry, Nicole helped both boys down off the high bed and started to get them ready to go to lunch.
Missing the warmth his sons' small bodies had provided, Harry growled and rolled over onto his back. The smell of more chicken noodle soup, this time accompanied with a grilled cheese sandwich assaulted his nose. "I hope you remembered the dill pickles this time," he teased Nicole, remembering how she insisted on having the slightly sour pickles every time Nola had made grilled cheese sandwiches for them.
"Of course I did. Who ever heard of serving grilled cheese without dill pickles?" she joked right back at the man on the bed, who had yet to open his eyes. "Now sit up and eat this before I have to put a warming charm on it."
Staring disinterestedly at the lunch Nicole had thoughtfully brought him, Harry added, "Well you could always just leave it here and if it gets to cold I can heat it up myself." Before the words were even out of his mouth, Harry knew that his proposal would be rejected for two reasons. Ever since he had woken up from his healing coma, everyone was obsessed that he eat properly, to bad he just didn't feel much like eating most of the time. And secondly, he was under strict orders that he wasn't to perform any magic until he was cleared by Poppy; he wasn't even allowed to perform the smallest first year charms. The last time he had asked when he might be allowed to practice magic again the look he got from Poppy indicated that he was a fool for even asking such a ridiculous question, clearly it would be some time yet.
Neither Draco nor Nicole even bothered to answer the pouting man. They knew that the best approach was just to let Harry grumble for awhile and that he would soon settle down and eat his lunch like the good boy he was.
Seeing that Harry was in Draco's capable hands and that Draco wouldn't let Harry leave even the smallest bite of lunch untouched, she got Matthew and Evan ready to go find their own lunch. "Hey boys, don't forget your hats."
She laughed as both boys immediately put on hats that had been laying forgotten on one of the vacant chairs. Harry studied the baseball cap styled hats that Matthew and Evan had just donned. They were both dark green and instead of a logo, the caps had lettering across the front. Harry shot Draco and then Nicole a puzzled look as he read the obscene saying that his sons' were now displaying on their heads.
Clearing his throat, Harry said in a deceptively calm voice, "Would anyone like to explain to me exactly why Matthew and Evan are wearing baseball caps that say "Super Dooper Pooper" on them?"
Still smiling, Nicole winked at Draco. "It's their reward."
Harry was starting to get worried that everyone had suddenly lost their mind. "If that is how you reward them, I'm afraid to ask what you do to punish them."
Nicole bent down and kissed Harry on his cheek. "Now you know better, I would never do anything to hurt either you or the boys, now Draco here, that's a different matter entirely."
Not letting himself get distracted by Nicole and Draco's teasing of each other as he usually did, Harry perused the topic of the disconcerting hats. Although now that he thought about it, the boys seemed to be pretty proud of their hats, almost like they really were a sort of reward. "Okay, so what are they being rewarded for?"
"See I told you it wouldn't take him that long to figure it out," Draco smirked at the brunette women.
"Well, he's not completely there yet, we'll see how long it takes, and no more clues," she responded trying not to giggle at the scared look that Harry was still sporting.
The verbal and physical clues his companions were giving him lead Harry to believe that he was missing something important. Slowly he read over the words so depicted so blazingly on Matthew's hat… 'Super Dooper Pooper'. Why did that stupid phrase sound kinda familiar? Then it hit him, of course, "The potty video."
Harry couldn't stop the huge grin from spreading across his face if he had wanted to. This was fantastic, monumental even… "They're potty trained," Harry managed to gasp out as he looked first to Draco and then to Nicole for confirmation. Seeing them nod, Harry reached out to grab both of his boys and gathered them close to him in a group hug.
"I'm so proud of both of you." Harry was squeezing them so tight that Draco was starting to get worried.
"You know, Leo, they need to breathe sometime."
Reluctantly, Harry released his tight grip on the boys, wincing slightly as he felt a sting where he irritated his healing incision when he moved suddenly when he hugged the boys. They had started the potty training process shortly after the boys turned three with only limited success. Neither boy really wanted to take the time away from their current activity to use the bathroom facilities. Seeing the lack of interest on the twin's part, Nicole had suggested a muggle video to use as a training tool. After the DVD and a muggle DVD player had been delivered and appropriately modified to work at Hogwarts, the real fun started. To say that from an adult's point of view that video was ridiculous was an understatement. It showed a bunch of three-year-old children practicing good toilet habits, but for whatever reason, the boys seemed to love it. They watched it over and over again, sometimes three times in a row.
Now Harry had to reevaluate his initial thoughts about the video as it appears that he had underestimated it. Not really caring where the credit for this achievement should fall, Harry helped in celebrating yet another milestone in his sons' lives.
To Be Continued.