Title: Pedophile

Pairing: Slight Kanda/Allen

Summary: No one is a pedophile. Really. Or, Rabi pokes Kanda.

After they caught the train and were seated in their own car, Allen ran off to find food and Rabi and Kanda settled into their seats to read their mission reports. Or rather, Kanda settled in to read. He felt eyes on him, and debated ignoring Rabi, but no, in the end, confronting him would take less energy.

"What!" Kanda said irritably turning to face Rabi. "I know you want something; don't just sit there and grin with that dumb look on your face."

"He's fifteen." Rabi grinned, eyes crinkling with glee.

"What?" Kanda tilted his head, now a touch of confusion lacing the irritation.

"Allen, he's fifteen." Rabi grinned.

"I know he's fifteen. So what?" Kanda turned away, a bored expression settling on his face.

"You're eighteen."

"I know that too." Kanda gritted his teeth. He would not lose his temper; it never led anywhere with Rabi, nothing ever got past him, and he never missed any little opening that might provide the chance for good entertainment. And the next thing you knew, he would have started reciting accounts of the Battle of Tours, cheerfully ignoring you as you tried to chop his head off.

"So if you're eighteen," Rabi paused, "And he's fifteen," Kanda's teeth clenched, "That makes you…a pedophile." Rabi sat back, satisfied. His work was done.

Kanda's mouth dropped open, working silently for a few long seconds, before leaping to the other seat, grabbing Rabi's collar in both hands. "I AM NOT A PEDOPHILE, YOU-"

A curious voice broke in, "You're not a pedo-, a pedo-what did you say? What's that?" Allen mumbled. They looked up, at Allen, meatpies in hands and mouth, staring back and forth curiously. Kanda let go of Rabi's collar and slumped back on his own seat, studiously ignoring everything and staring out the window.

Rabi beamed like a proud father. "Well, you see Allen, a pedophile is someone who—URK!" Rabi's words were cut off as a booted foot planted itself squarely in his stomach. "Shut up. You've talked enough for today," Kanda growled.

"Huh? Huh?" Allen stood there, face slack, bewildered eyes jumping from a fuming Kanda to a hunched over, gasping Rabi, and back again.

"What are you doing, standing there like an idiot, bean sprout?" Kanda snapped, "Sit down and eat!"

Allen's eyes widened in anger, and he stomped over to Kanda, hurriedly swallowing down his food. "I am not a bean sprout! Allen! My name is Al. Len. Allen!" He shouted, breathing heavily.

"Whatever." Kanda smirked and waved his hand at the seat. "Sit down before your food gets cold and I have to listen to your whining."

"Whi-?" Allen huffed and threw himself in the seat, and settled down to eat his food at a prodigious rate, occasionally surfacing to shoot glares at Kanda.

Rabi smiled.