Disclaimer - I still own nothing… at all… not even the computer… which I stole off a gypsy selling lavender.

Note: Once again, I'm sorry for not updating sooner. It took a while to bribe my muse to come back. But now it is, so I can finally update!

Reviewers: YAY!

On with the story.

Chapter 7 – The cat strikes back

Well, now Voldemort was in full-blown panic mode. Lily and James would probably be back soon. What the hell would they think when they came home to find their child drunk? 'How am I going to get out of this? The phrase "I didn't do it" won't work this time! You are well and truly screwed, my friend.'

He was brought out of his thoughts when the phone rang. Not noticing Harry climbing unsteadily out of his high chair, walked out of the room, and answered the phone.

"What!"

"Erm, Voldemort? It's Lily."

'Oh, crap!' Voldemort fought to keep the panic out of his voice. "Um, hi, is something wrong?"

"No, everything's fine, I'm just letting you know that we should be home in about an hour. Is everything ok with Harry?"

As Voldemort went to reply, he heard James' voice on the other end of the phone.

"Ha! I knew it, you're seeing someone else, aren't you? I trusted you, and all this time you were seeing this Harry bloke!"

"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! James, he's our son!"

The line was quiet for a while, and Voldemort was about to speak, when James suddenly cried – "Oh, Yeah! God I completely forgot, I'm sorry Lily."

"You will be, you Twit, just go sit back down! I'm sorry Voldemort, how's Harry?" Lily sounded like she was going to snap at any moment.

Voldemort turned to look at Harry just in time to see the infant walk into a door, and fall on the floor, seemingly unconscious.

"Well he's er… dead to the world! Really, he is asleep at the moment."

"Oh, that's good, I hope he hasn't been too much trouble."

"Oh, no trouble at all, infact,I wish I had five just like him!" Voldemort rolled his eyes at this. 'Yeah, right.'

"Well, like I said, we'll be back soon, bye."

Voldemort hung up, and banged his head on the wall. 'How am I going to sober up the kid? If I give him food, it might make him sick… maybe I should just put him back to bed and pray that they don't notice that he stinks of bud. Unless I convince them it's new cologne, from my mother, well that shouldn't be too hard, they already hang on my every word.'

Voldemort walked back into the kitchen, where he last saw the unconscious baby, to find Harry was awake again, and now in the process of climbing out of the cat flap. However, he noticed that he wasn't moving. Cautiously, he walked over to the door, and pulled Harry out of the cat flap. 'Well, he's breathing, so he must be asleep – finally! Wait, I didn't know they had a cat.'

He looked around, still holding a sleeping Harry, when he saw the very same cat that attacked him walk through the cat flap. 'NO FRICKING WAY!' Carefully he put Harry in his high chair, while the cat watched his every move.

Voldemort turned to face the cat, and without warning the cat sprung at him, knocking him to the ground, clawing at his face.

"OH GOD, PLEASE, NOT THE FACE!"

The cat stopped clawing his face, but started attacking his groin.

"AAAAHHHHH, THE FACE, THE FACE!"

The cat then moved back to his face, and Voldemort let out a sigh of relief. In the distance, Voldemort could hear the sound of clapping. He looked up to see Harry once again awake, and taking pleasure out of seeing him in pain.

Voldemort took out his wand, stunned the cat and stood up. Harry had a look of horror on his face, at the sight of his pet. Thinking it was dead, he burst out crying.

Voldemort panicked. "No, it's ok, see? It's alive, look!"

He picked the cat up, moved it around, and made cat-like noisestrying to make it look alive. Buthe didn'twant to reverse the spell yet, as he wanted to avoid another fight. Harry though, wasn't buying it, and kept crying.

So Voldemort sighed, and put the cat by the door, and reversed the spell, and the cat became mobile again. Harry stopped crying at once, and smiled at the alive cat. The cat, however, took one look at Voldemort and sprinted out the cat flap so fast, that it left a trail of smoke behind it.

Well, all Voldemort had to do now was to get Harry to sleep. But he noticed that Harry was holding his head.

"Hung over?"

Harry looked at him as if to say what do you think?

"Well that's what you get for drinking."

Harry just glared at him.'It wasn't my fault that somebody gave me the wrong thing to drink, I mean, honestly, how thick can you get?'

"Well, let's see if your parents have any hangover potions."

Luckily, there was one in the medicine cabinet, so he gave it to Harry, who drank the lot.

"Better?"

Harry nodded, thankful that his headache had gone.

"Well, since I helped you with your head, now I would appreciate it if you went to bed, and stayed there."

'Well, I've had my fun, and I am tired, so whatever.' He let Voldemort carry him upstairs and left him in his room.

Voldemort tidied up the mess in the house, and sat back on the couch when he had finished. He went through the events of the night and sighed. 'The things I do for votes!' He looked at the clock, it was late. He sat back and waited for James and Lily to return.

Another chapter done! I actually enjoyed writing this one. There is only going to be one or two more chapters, and I'll try to update sooner. Just to let you know, reviews really make me happy, so please, leave one, even if you just feel sorry for me, I'd still appreciate it!