Chapter 16

Ballad of Fallen Angels

It was the dawn of the third day since their return to Gun Smoke and Sky City.

There had, understandably, been a lot of fuss upon their arrival. Professor Alexander Adams was escorted away to the brig and he remained there fore a good few hours whilst his story was revealed.

Alex seemed most co-operative; he answered the Doctor's questions quickly, honestly… but not completely.

His story seemed reasonable enough, he told the Doctor of his faked suicide due to his concern over Vash and Knives. Told him about waking up because of the disturbance caused by Vash's attack on the fifth moon. He went on to speak about finding Rem's dead, floating body, his rage and sorrow. Thinking that it was Vash who had caused this deed, a supposition backed up by the claims of numerous people on Gun Smoke and Vash's own status as a humanoid disaster zone. He'd decided to take revenge and stop Vash. He had the technology to create the nano-bots, had managed to steal the raw materials from Sky City (using his high security level) and then, following the rumours, swiftly found Vash's residence. From then on he'd learned of his inordinate love of doughnuts and infected Vash by coating little sugary droplets with the nanno-bots and selling them to the doughnut vendor as silver sprinkles.

However, Alex did not mention the exact origins of Vash and Knives, nor did he go into his reasons for choosing to turn Vash into a male Plant.

If the Doctor noticed these glossed over patches in Alex's story, he gave no indication of it. With the permission of Meryl and Millie, he let Alex go, on condition that he remained within the confines of Sky City until Vash was awake.

This didn't look like it was going to happen any time soon, he had slept solidly since their arrival. A condition, Alex had assured, most probably caused by the amount of energy his body was expanding in reversing the changes.

And Vash was changing once more, slowly but steadily reverting to his usual form. His face was now back to it's usual proportions, all the feathers had peeled from his wings, leaving them as mere skeletal ornaments which, apparently, would be shed soon enough.

Knives, by contrast, had awoken just the other day, showing no ill effects other than a very nasty headache and a rather short temper. He'd grudgingly allowed Millie to tend to him, (a situation Meryl was less than happy with,) but had spoken little and what he had said was… odd.

Meryl was just going to give him his breakfast that morning when she saw Alex, sitting by the window of their small quarters, watching the sunrise.

'Good morning,' she greeted. She found herself rather enjoying Alex's company. For despite all his idiosyncrasies and eccentricities, he was saner than most of the people she spent her time with.

'Good morning,' he retuned cheerily. 'It's a beautiful sunrise, isn't it?'

'I suppose so,' said Meryl, it didn't look anything that special to her, but she supposed that Alex hadn't seen that many Gun Smoke sunrises. 'I've just come down with breakfast for Knives.'

'That's nice.'

'You know,' continued Meryl, 'tomorrow is their birthday, Vash and Knives birthday that is. I thought I might make them something special for breakfast.'

'Good idea.'

'You're not going to be around by then, are you?'

Meryl didn't know what had caused this particular flash of insight, but she suddenly knew it, as surely as she knew anything. It was written all over the scientist, in the way his head drooped, in the way his eyes scanned the morning horizon.

'Yes…' he muttered. 'Yes… I'll be gone.'

'Why?'

Alex smiled sadly, 'I hardly think I'm welcome here, do you?'

'Knives might not be your biggest fan,' replied Meryl. 'But Vash… you don't know him. He's one of the most gentle, forgiving people I know, once he learns what happened I'm sure he'll understand. Please… if you give him a chance then he won't hold anything against you.'

'I know,' sighed Alex, 'that's why I'm leaving.'

'I don't understand.'

Alex opened his mouth to say something, closed it, sighed, and shook his head.

'It doesn't matter,' he said. 'I don't think I can put it into words except to say… I… I'm not ready. I can't face that, I can't face him… not even in forgiveness… not now. I need to leave, to learn more about this planet, figure out things. Find a new way to Eden.'

Meryl frowned, she clenched her hands. 'You're not being rational,' she said, feeling more than a little annoyed.

'No,' agreed Alex, 'I don't suppose I am but… I think, in the final analysis it comes to this… I don't deserve them. I'm a foolish, cowardly old man, Miss Strife, I'm not worthy of my sons, who are greater and gooder than I can ever hope to be.'

'You do yourself an injustice.'

Alex shrugged and turned away from the rising sun. He stood up and stretched his muscles, yawning the residue of sleep away.

'When are you going?' asked Meryl. 'And how are you going? How are you going to get out of here?'

'I have my ways,' replied Alex slyly. 'I probably know this place and the technology here better than anyone, even the Doctor. And as for when… just about as soon as I've finished talking to you I suppose. No point in putting it off.'

'You're not even going to say goodbye to Knives?'

'Would he want me to? I've think Knives will be glad to see the back of me.'

'I don't know,' said Meryl, thoughtfully. 'Knives is pretty much like that with anyone, even Vash upon occasion. He does dislike you, yes, but I think that that's partly because you remind him of himself so much. He's trying to find a new way to Eden, too, trying to make amends for his mistakes. I think he's worried that he'll mess up, like you. You're kind of a reminder to his past, as well as a warning about his future.'

'A past he might well return to,' said Alex darkly. 'He was ranting about continuing his crusade… until I heard you tell me what he did… I never would have believed… do you think he really will start all that up again? All because of me?'

Meryl shook her head, 'I don't know,' she said. 'It's a strange thing… just a little while after he awoke I mentioned something about that, in passing. But he didn't seem to remember anything. He seems to be under the impression that you were just changing Vash into a Plant for some sort of punishment or some such…'

'Any idea why that is? Are you going to tell him the truth?'

Meryl frowned, 'no.' She said at last, 'No, I'm not. And I'm not going to tell Vash either, if anyone should do that it's you. And as for why he doesn't remember… well, I think it's because of the stress. Sometimes, when Vash is stressed or in a lot of pain, he blocks out huge chunks of his memory. He did it after activating his Angel Arm. I think Knives has done that too, it must be some sort of Plant defence mechanism. If a memory is too painful or traumatising then his brain just blocks it out.'

'Interesting theory, I like it. Just how long do you think these 'blocks' will last?'

'I don't know, a long time I hope.'

Alex nodded in agreement, then his eyes widened and he slapped himself on the forehead. 'Damn,' he swore, 'talk about forgetfulness! I almost forgot this-' he reached into a pocket of the blue jeans he now wore and brought out something small and golden. Meryl recognised it as the locket. 'I believe it belongs to you,' he said,. 'Sorry about hitting you, by the way.'

He threw the necklace towards her but his aim was dreadful, she had to lunge forward to catch it. 'That's alright,' said replied, 'I understand.'

She looked down at the charm in her hands, she ran a finger absently over the little inscriptions on its surface.

'Tell me,' she said at last, 'what… what was she like?'

'She? You mean Rem?'

Meryl nodded.

Alex sighed, his eyes seemed to become unfazed, misty as he looked into the past. 'She was amazing,' he said. 'Beautiful, intelligent, gentle, kind, generous and always forgiving. She had this way of looking at the world, of seeing the magic in almost anything. She could turn a cup of coffee into a miracle, a walk down the street into a philosophical lesson. She was… unique.'

Meryl's heart plummeted as she heard the reverential description, how could she ever stand a chance against a woman like that? They didn't even sound remotely similar, for a start. How could… why had Vash ever shown the smallest amount of interest in her? Was he just stringing her along? Was she just a passing fancy?

Alex saw the look on her face and moved over to put a hand on her shoulder. 'Listen,' he said, 'I don't entirely understand what's going on between you and Vash but… well… whatever you do, do it soon. If there's one thing I've learned is that for all man's power, he is not immortal. We must grab the day, seize the moment, you can't hover in indecision forever. Do you understand?'

'Yes,' said Meryl glumly. 'I do, but it's harder than is seems.'

'I know,' sighed Alex, 'I know.'

They stood there in silence for a while, neither sure what to say, until as last Alex sighed once more. 'Well, I think it's past time I was off.'

'Yes,' agreed Meryl, 'I suppose it is.'

'Will you say goodbye to Miss Thompson for me?'

'Of course.'

'And Vash and Knives too, if you can. Please, pass on my apologies for this and everything else. I wish them best of luck in the future, I… I hope one day they might both forgive me, I hope I can meet them again. I would like that.'

'Are you sure you want to go? As I said, I'm sure you don't need to.'

'Yes, I do. Tell the Doctor that he can feel free to take as much technology from the SEEDS ship as he wishes. It might as well come to some use and the emergency energy supply should last a month or so.'

'And Rem's body?'

Alex looked shocked that she knew about that. 'I…' he paused, 'I suppose that's up to Vash and Knives,' he said at last. 'But please… tell them to treat her gently.'

'I'm sure they wouldn't do anything else.'

Alex nodded and moved into his own section of their shared quarters. He came back with a small rucksack and a long, brown, rather battered looking coat.

'Well,' he said, 'I'm off. Good luck to you, and goodbye.'

'Goodbye,' returned Meryl as he walked out of the door. 'And try not to get into too much trouble!' she shouted after him, but he was already gone.

She sat down in a near by chair, Knives' breakfast cooling on the table, forgotten about completely. She really should give it to him but, right now, she wanted to spend some time alone and seeing his face would only remind her of his brother's, and the difficult decision she must make.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

As it happened, Knives never did receive his breakfast. However, this did not result in a particular high temper, as it usually would. He found that his mind was far too engaged in other matters to allow a missing meal to bother him.

It was mid day and he was doing some his usual exercises when Millie entered his room, bearing large plate of sandwiches, his mid day meal.

Knives looked up from his press-up and quickly rose to his feet. Millie was blushing bright crimson, for he was not wearing any shirt.

Seeing her expression Knives quickly moved to remedy the situation, grabbing the cast off garment from his bed and slipping it on over his shoulders. He used the excuse of doing up the buttons to avoid her gaze. Aside from simply keeping his body and skills in shape, he'd been exercising to keep his mind off a certain issue which had been troubling him of late.

'I brought you your lunch,' said Millie unnecessarily. 'Meryl forgot about your breakfast because she was talking to Mr Alex. She says she is sorry.'

Knives grunted noncommittally and reached out for the tray.

'Mr Alex has left,' Millie said suddenly as he took the food. 'He went just after talking to Ma'am. The Doctor has the entire city looking for him, but I don't think they'll find him. He seemed very clever, didn't he?'

Knives gave out another grunt, 'I suppose,' he said. 'Good riddance, I say.'

'Mr Knives that's mean! He is your family.'

'A father that tries to kill his son is no kind of family,' snapped Knives. For some reason he found himself uncomfortable with this line of conversation. Not for the first time he felt… odd. Like there was something he'd forgotten, something he'd put aside. He'd found that, since awakening, some of his memory was a blur and every time he tried to work out the details he found himself unable to. F strange, uncomfortable feeling of dread stopped him. One thing he could remember, however, was what had occurred with Millie.

'Spi… huma… Miss… ah… Millie,' he began, trying to discover the right term. 'About what happened before, when the Plant effected me… I wanted to say… that is…'

Even as his stuttering words came out Knives inwardly cursed himself. How was it that now, of all times, his usually adequate lexical and reasoning abilities failed him? His message was clear but he just couldn't phrase it in the right manner, not when that damn female human was looking at him like that.

Oddly enough, Millie saved him the trouble. 'It's alright Mr Knives,' she said brightly. 'If it's about when you kissed me, then don't worry. I know that the Plant song was effecting you, its scream was what knocked you out. I don't mind and I know you'd never to anything like that usually.'

Knives didn't even attempt to hide his sight of relief. 'Good,' he said simply.

Millie grinned and turned to go, but Knives shouted, 'wait,' and she did.

Knives swallowed nervously and licked his lips. He really wasn't sure how to go about doing something like this, didn't like even having to say this but… well, it was probably best to get it over with.

'I was thinking,' he said slowly, 'I… would you… would like to eat my sandwiches with me?'

Millie blinked, for a moment something strange, some emotion or memory, flickered within her eyes and Knives suddenly felt even more self conscious.

'Why?' she asked blandly.

'Because…' because you're not like any other human I've met… 'Because…' because I find your company tolerable and interesting… 'Because…' because I'm fascinated by you, I want to learn more… 'Because I'm not hungry, I can't finish all these on my own so… would you like to share?' Because I'm feeling emotions I'm not used to, and I want to explore them with you... because you make me smile.

Once more something strange passed beneath Millie Thompson's eyes, but her bland expression soon morphed into her usual, innocent grin.

'Thank you very much, Mr Knives, that sounds wonderful,' she said. Making the corners of Knives mouth twitch upwards almost imperceptibly, 'but I can't.'

'Why not?' asked Knives, trying to keep all emotion out of his voice.

'It's Sunday,' explained Millie. 'I always go to church on Sunday, to spend time with Nicholas.'

'Chapel? Wolfwood?'

'Yes, I see him almost every time I prey! So I go to church every week when I can. But because of all the things that have been happening recently I've not been able to go much, so I really should go today. He'll get worried otherwise, and I don't want to make him sad. You understand that, don't you Mr Knives?'

For once it was all Knives could do nod and he kept his head bowed, not wanting to watch Millie leave the room as bouncily as she'd entered it.

Knives sat down on the bed, his plate of sandwiches upon his lap, he stared blankly at the little triangles of bred and filling.

Then, cursing himself vehemently, he flung the carefully made sandwiches against the wall.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

'Malting,' said Vash, wincing as he plucked yet another white feather from his arm, 'sucks.'

Knives looked up from his book (Crime and Punishment,) and grunted concomitantly.

It had been a full day since Alex had left, and Vash had been awake for about seven hours. Most of these hours had been filled with either Vash's constant whining, or rapt silences as Knives and the girls explained what had occurred.

Vash sighed and lay back amongst the pillows. 'I wish I could have talked to him,' he muttered.

'Who?' asked Knives, abandoning the book.

'Professor Alexander Adams, of course,' explained Vash.

Knives sniffed disdainfully.

'Oh come on,' scoffed Vash. 'Don't tell me you don't feel the same way! I know you didn't get on with the guy but still… he's our father! Or the closest thing to it. Think of all the questions he could answer. He's an important part of our past, Knives. Plus… plus I'd have liked to talk to him about Rem.'

Once more Knives shrugged, 'if you say so,' he muttered. He stood up out of his chair.

'Where are you going?' asked Vash.

'Out,' replied Knives simply.

'I'll see you at dinner thought, right?'

'No,' said Knives, solemnly. 'I'm going. I'm leaving, I've been here long enough.'

'But-'

'It's our birthday, Vash.'

Vash blinked, trying to connect what that meant. He soon remembered.

'Oh,' he said simply then, after a brief pause. 'So what are you going to do? I mean, are you going to go back to killing people again?'

The question was asked without any ounce of jollity or jest.

Knives sighed and slowly raked his hands through his short blond hair. 'I don't know,' he said. 'If you're asking if I'm going to start my crusade again… no. No, I won't. I'll promise you that much, not this year. But not to kill at all… I'll try Vash, that's all I can say.'

'But human life is worth-'

'I'll decide what human life is worth for myself, Vash,' snapped Knives. 'Right now I'm not sure, I'll let you know when I am.'

Vash sighed, 'alright then but please… try no to kill anyone? For my sake?'

'We'll see,' muttered Knives.

Vash nodded and looked down sadly at the bedspread. 'It's a shame,' he said at last. 'I was kinda hoping we could talk more, chat, catch up. As it was we hardly got to spend much time together at all.'

'I suppose that's the way it goes,' replied Knives.

'Yeah. Look, I'm sorry for what happened back at the ship, when we fought? It was dumb and I was in a crappy mood and, well, I'm sorry.'

'Don't worry about it,' Knives said dismissively. 'I suppose I was just as much an idiot in my own way. Vash… I don't approve of your relationship with that human female. I think that, in the long run, it's a move of stupidity, an act of idiocy on a truly grand scale. But I respect your decision and I won't try to get in the way of it. It's your mistake to make I suppose.'

'Thank you Knives,' said Vash, truly sincere. 'That means a lot to me.'

Knives grunted and nodded his head. 'Speaking of which,' he said, 'Meryl wants to talk to you, I think you need some time alone with her.'

He shot Vash a particularly meaningful look, and matched out of the room. A few moments later Meryl replaced him, entering Vash's chamber and taking a seat by his bed.

'Hi,' said Vash shyly.

'Hello,' returned Meryl, fidgeting in her chair.

For a while neither of them spoke. Despite the fact Vash had been awake for some time, they'd not had chance to exchange any words in private.

'So…' said Meryl at last, casting about for some conversation, 'how do you feel?'

'Dreadful,' whined Vash. 'I'm shedding all these feathers! Don't suppose you could kiss me better?'

'Seriously,' sighed Meryl, rolling her eyes.

'Alright,' the gunman replied, blushing. 'The Doctor says I'll be up and about in a few days. The wings should fall off pretty soon, that's gonna really hurt but, hey, at least I'll be able to fit through doorways again!'

Meryl's dour expression did not change. 'So,' she said, 'there'll be no lasting effects?'

Vash looked away, 'there should be some scarring on my back,' he muttered. 'But I've got worse, you've seen.'

'Good,' said Meryl confidentially and once more a long, awkward silence descended.

Vash hated long awkward silences.

'So,' he said at last, 'um… what was my dad like?'

'Mr Adams?' asked Meryl, 'oh, he was… well, he seemed nice enough. Intelligent, sharp, down to earth, a little arrogant perhaps…'

'He sounds just like Knives,' giggled Vash. 'No wonder they didn't get on!'

Meryl didn't join him in mirth, instead she said, 'he was a lot like you, too. Idealistic, gentle, a pacifist.'

'Good looking, poetic, heroic?'

'Don't push it.'

Vash started to laugh again, but stopped when he saw the solemn expression on Meryl's face. She seemed to be fiddling absently with her right hand, slowly twisting something on her finger.

Ah yes… now he remembered.

Shyly, gently, he reached out and took her other hand, he smiled. 'Are you thinking about our engagement?'

'Yes,' replied Meryl quietly. She looked into his eyes for a moment then carefully extracted her hand from his grip. Slowly, she pulled off his earring, taking it off her index finger and handing the small silver band back to him.

'I believe this is yours,' she said.

Vash looked at the silver hoop mutely, confused, his eyes watering.

'Why?' he asked simply.

Meryl sighed and turned away, it seemed she was trying to find the right words to say. 'Vash,' she said at last, 'I love you. You've no idea how long I've meant to say it, but I do. I would follow you across the world, hell, I nearly have. I'd wait a thousand years for you, if I had to. But… the problem is… I don't know that you'd do the same for me.'

She paused and wiped her eyes, denying the tears that welled there. 'I can't marry someone without knowing that they love me.'

'I gave you that ring, didn't I? Doesn't that prove my love?' asked Vash, trying to keep desperation and recrimination from his voice.

'Does it?' returned Meryl. 'I don't think so. You said it yourself at the time, you gave me this ring because you thought you were going to die, because you wanted something to return to, someone waiting for you, someone to follow you. That was wrong, Vash. It was cruel and a little selfish, to make me pledge that when you knew full well you might die. Wolfwood did the same, he asked Millie to wait for him and she did, she's still waiting for him. Just like you're waiting for Rem. Just like she waited for Alex. In it's way, it's almost as bad as revenge. Well, someone is going to put a stop to this. I won't do that, Vash. I'm not going to condemn myself to waiting my entire life for someone who I don't even know loves me in return. I need proof before I commit myself like that.'

'What are you going to do? What do you want me to do? Is there any way...?'

'Yes,' said Meryl, standing up, 'there is. I'm leaving Vash.'

Vash blinked, suddenly the room seemed very small and hot around him. He felt the blood drain from his face. 'What?'

'I'm leaving, with Knives. I'll be travelling with him for a while, to keep him out of mischief apart from anything. You can follow me when you're feeling better, if you're up to it, if you're willing. I'm sure Millie will take care of you in the mean time. Vash… for a long while I've waited for you and I've followed you, not just because it was my job or my duty, but because I loved you. Now it's time for you to wait, for you to follow. Now it's time for you to prove the same. If you can't then… well… this obviously wasn't meant to be.'

'But-' began Vash, but found that all the protests which came to his mind were weak and feeble against Meryl's argument. Was she right? Was he just using her as some tool, some thing to come back to? Some strange security blanket? Did he really love her?

'When are you going?' he asked.

'Now,' said Meryl, I'm leaving with Knives, as I said. Here,' she tossed something, a small envelope towards him. 'This might help… or not. I decided that Millie's wrong, that you need to see this.'

'Wrong about what?' queried Vash, but before Meryl could answer Knives came in. He looked somewhat impatient.

'Are you ready to go?'

'Yes,' said Meryl, arising from her chair.

'Wait!' beseeched Vash.

Meryl turned to him, she looked truly sad. 'Goodbye Mr Vash,' was all she said, before turning on her heel and leaving the room.

'Knives!' implored Vash, gazing at his brother desperately.

'Don't worry Vash,' said Knives, solemnly. 'I swear I'll look after her. I will see you next year, if not earlier.'

'But-' began Vash, then he stopped. A mere glance and Knives stony expression told him it would be little use changing his mind. Indeed, there was only one other person who was possibly more single minded than Millions Knives, and that was Meryl Strife. Without having to evaluate the situation any further, Vash knew immediately that he'd lost. There was no point in arguing or protesting.

'Please,' he begged, 'please protect her!'

Knives nodded. 'Goodbye brother,' he said, before following Meryl out and closing the door behind him.

Vash was left alone in his small room, Meryl's letter crinkled and squashed in one hand, the cold metal of his earring digging into the palm of his other.

Slowly, quietly, he wept.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Mille was waiting outside the door, wringing her hands. 'Ma'am?' she asked, her concern evident.

'I'm alright Millie,' said Meryl, forcing a smile to her lips. 'But it's time we left.'

'Mr Rex says that I can travel in the car with you, just until you get to the outskirts of Sky City.'

'That's excellent,' Meryl said, not even trying to keep the happiness from her voice. 'It would be nice to have someone see us off.'

Knives, if he had any thoughts on the matter, remained silent.

They and Sky City's head of security, Rex, made their way out of their quarters, down the twisting corridors and out of the city where a car waited for them.

'We traded ten of these for a hover vehicle last month,' grunted Rex, getting in the driving seat and starting it up. 'The Doctor generously decided to give you this one. Though he'd be grateful if you could bring it back when you've finished… this or a replacement, that is.'

'I'll be sure to do that,' vowed Meryl solemnly. 'Please pass on my sincere thanks to the Doctor for all he's done for us.'

Rex grunted and once the other three had entered the vehicle, he started it up.

He drove them just half a mile out of Sky City, far enough to get them out of the way of the main border patrols, before he stopped the car. He exited it with Millie, leaving Meryl and Knives on their own.

'I'm off back to the city,' he said curtly, 'Miss Thompson?'

'I'll follow in a bit,' said Millie, 'I just want to say goodbye to Mr Knives and Ma'am.'

'Alright,' replied Rex. 'Goodbye Miss Strife, Knives.' he gave Meryl a sharp bow and shot a cutting look towards Knives before starting off back towards the city,

'Well,' said Meryl bracingly, 'I suppose its goodbye then, Millie. I trust that you'll look after yourself and continue to send reports to Bernelli on Vash. You're not to let your guard down one moment mind you. You know what a disaster zone he is. I'd hate to pick up a news paper and read of some catastrophe and wonder if you'd filed a report to-'

'Ma'am,' interrupted Millie. 'Don't worry. I'll take good care of Mr Vash.'

Despite herself, Meryl felt tears welling in her eyes. It took all of her considerable willpower to hold them back. She'd not been separated from Millie for over a year and a half, and that previous separation had only been because the tall girl had wanted to visit her family, to help her recover from Wolfwood's death.

Now it looked like they were separating again, this time for who knew how long. Meryl wasn't even sure where she was headed next. She had a notion to visit the Bernelli main offices but she wasn't sure how will that would go down, what with taking the wanted Knives with her. Perhaps she could apply for a job trailing him for a bit?

'Oh Millie,' she murmured and allowed herself to be hugged by her partner, who was making no attempt at all to hide her tears.

'You look after yourself,' she sniffed, 'and Mr Knives too. He needs someone just as bad, I think.'

Meryl laughed, 'off all the people to be worried about… but yes, I'm sure we'll look after ourselves. I hope… I know we'll meet again soon Millie.'

'Of course we will Ma'am! Nothing can keep us apart!'

Meryl nodded and slipped into the driver seat. Knives moved into the shotgun seat.

'Bye Mr Knives,' said Millie happily, even though the tall half Plant had remained utterly silent ever since they'd left Sky City. 'Please look after yourself as well.'

Knives only nodded, he opened his mouth as if he was going to say something at last, then quickly closed it. He turned away, reached into a coat pocket, and drew out a pair of dark, spiky sunglasses, which he slipped over his eyes.

Meryl started the car. 'Good bye Millie!' she cried before her voice was drowned out by the humming of the engine and the whistle of sand spat out from under wheels.

The car started off, moving swiftly away from Millie, who was waving manically and still yelling her goodbyes, tears brimming in her large, blue eyes.

Meryl waved back once, then put all her concentration on driving. Knives made no move to return her partner's frantic waves. He remained grim and silent behind the wheel, his eyes (hidden by dark lenses,) seemed fixed before him.

They rode on for a minute before the silence became too much for Meryl. It was time to lay down some ground rules… or at least sort out the terrain of her relationship with Knives.

It occurred to her that, even in the weeks they'd met, they'd spent little time alone together.

'Well,' she said, 'you can stop that gloating right this moment.'

'Excuse me?' asked Knives and under his usual superior tone Meryl detected the lightest hint of incredulity.

'Gloating,' the repeated.; 'About me and Vash. I suppose you're over the moons that we're not getting married after all. Well don't hold your breath… there's still a chance… if he follows me…'

'I hope he has the sense not to,' growled Knives. 'But for your information I wasn't gloating. What happens between you and Vash is your business, there's nothing I can… nothing I will do to interfere.'

'Really?' Meryl couldn't help but be sceptical. 'You mean that? I thought you disapproved of me.'

'You're human, of course I disapprove.'

'I saved your life, didn't I? I stopped that Jessica girl from killing you.'

'Only because it would impress Vash.'

There was a squeal of breaks, the tyres kicked up sand, both occupants jerked forward to the limit of their seat belts.

'Right, that's it!' said Meryl, taking her foot off the break peddle and turning to face a startled Knives. 'It's time we got a few things straight between us. I did not save your sorry ass because of Vash… or not directly at least. Vash might think that you've changed. Vash might think that you can repent. I'm not convinced. Personally I think that, sooner or later, you'll turn back to your old ways and that will leave a lot of people very sorry indeed, not least of whom will be Vash. Personally I think that, if anyone upon this miserable planet deserves death, it's you. But do you know why I didn't let that girl kill you?'

She didn't wait for an answer, not that the shocked Knives looked prepared to give her one. 'Because I actually do believe that life, even your life, is worth something. Because I was willing to give you a chance. Because I'm willing to trust in Vash with this, to have faith that he might be right about you. I just wish you'd have the decency to do the same about me.'

Finally finishing her tirade, Meryl started up the car again but drove considerably slower and more carefully than before, her hands where shaking from the relief of letting off her temper. Letting of steam from an issue which had been brewing in her gut for a long while.

When Knives finally spoke it was with a low, solemn voice and he did not turn to look at her, instead his eyes, hidden by sunglasses, seemed to be turned to the side, watching the landscape roll past.

'I never said I wasn't grateful for what you did,' he replied at length. 'And… I do trust you to an extent. If I didn't I would have never agreed to your company. But my doubts about you and Vash are deeper than you can ever appreciate.'

'Try me.'

Meryl did not look towards him as she spoke, she only hoped he had heard her and would rise to the challenge.

After another seconds thought, he did so. 'You don't know my brother,' he said. 'Not like I do. You don't see… no matter what else you might think of me, you and I both share one thing in common. We both love Vash. The only difference is that I've loved him for longer, and perhaps in a different manner. You've never seen Vash in love, have you? I'm sure you've not. I have. I was there when he loved Rem, I was the one who destroyed her, who watched what that did to him. When Vash the Stampede loves, really loves, he does so with all his body, soul and mind. It's utter and complete love, truer and more eternal than anything a human can conceive. That love died with Rem Saverem, it almost sent him into madness, almost destroyed me also. It's left scars upon his mind and soul for worse and far more hideous than those that mar his body. He has not loved anyone, anyone at all, in that manner since the day Rem Saverem passed from this universe. Now you ask that I should condone love between you two? You expect that I should wish you well, should prey that Vash follows you? That he should fall in love with you in that same way? You're a selfish, short sighted idiot, like most humans. You don't understand, cannot comprehend… even if you live to one hundred, you'll still die before him. On that day he'll loose everything once more, he'll be cast into that dreadful place again. On that day he'll thrown deeper into ultimate suffering than I and my Gung-Ho-Guns could ever have accomplished. On that day I will most likely loose him forever. So forgive me if I don't cheer on your attempts to romance my brother.'

Meryl found herself completely devoid of the power of speech, she didn't know how to respond. The only words that could come to her mouth were. 'I'm sorry.'

Knives shrugged, 'I don't particularly blame you. There's no point, we can never predict where our hearts lead us.'

And it seemed to Meryl that his gaze, hidden as it was, was drawn away from the rolling scenery to the rear view mirror, to the rolling dunes they'd passed. Back towards the small, white blob on the horizon. Back towards Sky City and the tiny, black dot of a figure in front of it, who was almost undoubtedly still waving manically. Until this, too, was lost to the golden desert sands and the endless blue sky.

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NEXT TIME: The Epilogue.