Surviving Stephanie Chapter 33

Disclaimer: Edited sex scene ahead. Check my site for the un-edited version.

Note: I intended to get back to the action this chapter but Alyssa apparently decided it was time for action of another kind. I can't blame her. Sorry about taking so long to update!

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I tore my gaze away from the two men sitting across the table and took a sip of the hot chocolate. The sugary sweetness of a melty marshmallow and the richness of the cocoa slid through me- a silent reassurance that it would be all right in the end. The chocolate tastes like chocolate, the snozberries taste like snozberries.

So, I was in love with Jason Bourne. And this one came with his own group of fellow Bournettes… Ranger and Tank and Lester and Bobby. Figures. I knew that first job Steph did with RangeMan must have been a test of some sort.

They hadn't said if they'd been Bournettes together or not. I didn't want to know. Probably they'd been affiliated- I mean, how many black ops thingies can there be? Ugh, another question I didn't want answered… Anyway, now they were business partners and probably definitely affiliated in their extracurriculars. Rent-a-soldier, Inc. And from the sounds of it they were all pretty tight buds too.

Bats of a feather and all that. Or flying monkeys, if you look at it another way.

I took another sip of cocoa. This just made things worse, though, didn't it? I mean, now that they think I've passed the test and been told their shadowy past… now what happens if Steph comes back? Oh, I was pretty sure Steph wouldn't be coming back now- this wasn't really her reality anymore. I was pretty suredad'sappearance Meant Something, but one should be prepared for any eventuality.

"Babe?" Ranger's voice was quiet. Hm, better not share my thoughts…

"Yes?" I asked, taking another drink. Gods I loved hot cocoa. Nothing could really truly go wrong as long as there was hot cocoa and marshmallows to be had.

Tank and Ranger were watching me cautiously. Wary, that was a better word. I sighed.

"You're staring," I told them. I smiled a little and stirred my drink.

"Well, you haven't said anything." Tank was looking curiously at the cup in front of me.

"It's hard to get too worked up when there's hot chocolate involved," I said with a shrug.

"That's it? We tell you… you did hear what we just said, right?" Tank was now scowling at me like I was an impertinent Trivial Pursuit card asking some completely redundant question. I added another marshmallow to the cocoa and took another long, refreshing drink.

"You're black ops. Or you were anyway. And you did Bad Things. And went Bad Places and it was very much in the ugly icky death and bullets kind of way. And now you don't, except maybe you do but of course you won't say that but it was a little implied. Oh, and there is always going to be lurking threats from the bad old days."

Ranger's head was tilted and his eyes were unreadable. I had a feeling he was adding a column up in his little businessmonkey brain and not getting the right number. Good. Test that. I watched them both with polite interest and kept on drinking my hot chocolate.

"You know, man, I was prepared for her to run screaming or some shit. I could handle that. This is freaky." Tank shook his head.

"Sorry to disappoint," I said sincerely. "It just explains a lot. And anyway, I had imagined it might have been something along those lines. Either you were all like Triple X or just really obsessive posers."

"You never disappoint, Babe," Ranger said with the ghost of a smile.

"Depends on your expectations, Ranger. For instance, if you expect me to cook- and that said cooking will be edible- then I might disappoint." I cringed at the thought. Tank snorted. Ranger's smile widened fractionally.

"Wouldn't dream of it." Smart little monkey.

"So, if we're through with revelations now, I think I'll go to bed," I said, yawning. I stood up and smiled at both the monkeys. "Sweet dreams, Tank."

"You too," he said with a little half-smile.

"And don't either one of you ever pull one of those psycho test things on me again or I'll kick your asses," I added as I headed out the door.

I walked into Ranger's room and sorted through his closet until I found a black t-shirt. I didn't look at the label. I didn't want to know if I was sleeping in a Sean John shirt or worse a YSL one or something. Probably I should have asked, but t-shirts are like hoodies. Being as I was a girl, and I'd slept with him and we were still friends, I had the right to kipe off with his shirts. Not dress shirts of course, but tees, tanks, hoodies, and sweats were fair game. Maybe jerseys if they were for a team I liked.

I slipped into one side of the bed, dressed in my appropriated shirt, and sighed as I sank into the mattress, reveled in the feel of Egyptian cotton. But this bed was just right… the ballad of Goldilocks and the two Bat Bears.

I giggled and turned a little more onto my uninjured side. I yawned again, closed my eyes, and fell asleep. At least I assumed I did because the next thing I was aware of was the bed moving a little as a weight settled into it. A very yummy-smelling weight.

"Somebody's sleeping in your bed?" I asked sleepily as my foggy little brain stumbled into the waking world. A masculine laugh.

"Yeah." The single syllable sent a spark of heat through my body. "And she's wearing my shirt, too," his voice was much closer than I would have thought and then I was being pulled backward, across cool sheets and settled against a warm solid chest.

"Mm, that's not good…."

"Oh, this is going to be good, Babe. Very good," he said quietly, his voice low and rough. My nipples tightened and I melted, just a little. Ranger laughed as his hand slipped under my shirt and began stroking my midriff, going steadily higher with each pass.

I sighed and wiggled my hips to settle closer to him. God, he was rock hard. Everywhere. "Just good?" I was going to voice a complaint until his teeth nipped my ear.

A moan tore from my throat as the desire shot straight through me. Pathetic- a little petting and I was panting already. Then again, this was a Sex God I was dealing with…

And then he stopped. His hand was on top of the shirt and he was just holding me. Sweet, but sweet was not on tonight's menu. I gritted my teeth and wished I was up to full strength so I could jump on top of him. The phrase 'riding like a pony' came to mind…

"Ranger?" I asked, hoping I didn't sound too desperate.

Instead of a normal reply I got rolled onto my back to find the Sex God himself staring down at me. It was dark, but I could feel the heat of his gaze. Ranger was nothing if not intense. His hand brushed down the side of my face, his fingers rough and calloused more than your average CEO's should be.

"Babe, nothing you heard tonight can leave here. You want out, you better—"

"Ranger, I don't want out. I told you downstairs that the rest of it doesn't bother me. I don't really care what you did. I care about you, who you are now. Maybe if you hadn't been there or done that you wouldn't be the guy I just totally fell for."

"You don't care I've killed people?"

"You were a soldier," I said gently. Hell, where I grew up, the VFW was hallowed ground. Veterans, soldiers, were a race above. You fought for Uncle Sam you were a hero. Simple rule.

"And if I killed innocent civilians? Children?"

"Combat isn't pretty." My voice was different, even in my own ears. I raised my own hand to touch his face, his silky hair. "And orders are orders."Grandpa had said something like that once.

"What if it wasn't under orders? What if I killed for the hell of it?" he said harshly, but he didn't move, not a muscle, even as I ran my hand through his hair.

"Then we aren't talking about you. That's some other person I haven't met."

"It could be a part of me. Doesn't it scare you, Babe?"

I was silent. It did scare me. A lot. I knew what violence guys could be capable of. I'd seen what it did to unfortunate girlfriends and innocent bystanders. I also trusted Ranger, at least the Ranger I knew. And if I didn't I was pretty much screwed anyway. I knew what was coming up the road ahead. I wasn't naïve enough to believe Abruzzi would just go away.

"A little," I admitted softly. "But we all have a dark side. So you've met yours. You have an advantage over most people then."

He still didn't move. Okay, the Inner Sith Lord I could handle. The inner statue I could not. It felt like he was still there but most of him was somewhere else. Sort of like when mom was on her astral projection kicks and sat in the meditation room for hours on end, but worse because he was so close and this was sort of an intimate setting to be doing that in.

"I love you, Ranger." Goddess help us both. "Now please move. Blink or something. It's getting trippy."

Silence followed by further lack of movement. Did he fall asleep?

"So… now that I'm staying do I get a nifty outfit?"

"Babe." And I was back to fulfilling the inner Care Bear as I was hugged and cuddled and snuggled. That was it. Lula and I were going out and I was coming back with a rainbow on my hip. And while I was out I was buying Ranger a teddy bear.

Oh all right, so I didn't really mind it. That was the embarrassing part. Ranger could wrap his arms around me and just hold me and I didn't mind. I felt safe, warm, stupidly happy just laying there like that. I despised this sort of thing.

Ranger was rubbing my back his hands gently and light. I barely even noticed my shirt creeping upward until his skin touched mine. It was instant electricity, sending a shiver down my spine.

"Anything you want," his voice was rough and raw. I had a feeling I'd missed a page somewhere. Something had just happened and I didn't know what it was. And did he really know what he was getting into asking that question? And what was he asking anyway?

If he would just stop touching me long enough for me to think… No, screw that. Thinking sucked. Sex with Sex Gods rocked. Even if they were monkeys sometimes.

New meaning to monkey sex… the thought shocked a gasp of laughter from me as I tried to answer him. "Anything?"

"Mm," he nipped my ear and moved his lips down to my neck. "Anything," he said, his breath sending a chill through me as it breezed over my dampened skin.

"I want you," I said without meaning to.

"For how long?" His fingers were doing that thing to my nipples again and it was shorting out my brain. I was panting, and dangerously close to whimpering as I moved against him, trying to incite him, make him forget about this stupid sudden urge for talking. He really chose the damnedest times to get all verbal.

"I don't care," I sighed, pressing my breasts against his hands. "For now. Forever. For as long as it lasts…. You're such a tease…" I whined. When gasping, whimpering, and wiggling didn't seem to work, I was not above a good whine.

"That's going to be a very long time, querida," he was laughing. Laughing. The Monkey.

"Really? I don't remember it being all that long last time…" I knew it was dumb to bait him but I really couldn't help it. I was just written that way. The laugh stopped.

"Babe," he said, his voice dangerous. His hand slid down my side and back to rest on my hip. "Behave. I'd hate to leave a mark on that sexy little ass of yours."

Oh, hell yes. I was grinning like the Cheshire Cat who just polished off a blackbird pie.

"I'd hate for you not to. Too bad you don't even have a place for handcuffs around here…"

"I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman." No, probably right. One look in those velvet dark eyes and I tended to do whatever he wanted. Probably it happened that way a lot.

"Yeah, but handcuffs make it more fun."

Ranger's hand slid further down and slipped between my thighs. I moved to give him a little more room as his fingers began teasing me. "You want me to cuff you?" he asked as if concerned. No, I wanted those fingers a little to the left… right there. I moaned and moved against him, one hand grasping his forearm, the other tangling helplessly in the sheets.

"That could be fun. This works. Oh god, this works…" I arched my back. "Ranger, please-"

"I love it when you beg, angel," he whispered. Good to know. Let's hear it for the love fest. The thoughts flashed through my head as he continued to tease me. His lips touched the curve of my neck, gentle then his teeth raked over the spot as his fingertips touched my clit until I came, gasping his name.

Ranger rolled onto his back and I remained on my side, not quite ready for the advanced theory of movement just yet. I wasn't sure about ruined but I was definitely getting spoiled… I didn't even have time to catch my breath before he was exactly where he'd been, but—oh, condom. And I'd been all ready to feel guilty about being the only one enjoying the fun.

"You didn't think we were done yet, did you?" he teased.

"Never crossed my mind."

"Liar." He laughed and kissed my ear. "Shall I time this one?" he added, his voice a deadly growl. Mood swing… Then somehow I was on my stomach and he was on top of me, pinning my arms behind me.

Afterward, hewas still for a moment, although he finally let go of my arms. We both took a moment to breathe and I might have passed out because the next moment Ranger was lying next to me, pushing my hair out of my face, running his hand down my back, speaking quietly. I could barely hear him, and I considered opening my eyes, but it seemed like too much effort. I couldn't tell if he thought I was awake or asleep so I decided, since he was talking I might as well listen.

"You shouldn't even be here. My life doesn't lend itself to relationships…"

Crap. Here it comes. The Go-Back-to-Morelli speech. So help me, Janet, when I can move I'm kicking Batman's ass. I stayed still and resisted the urge to sit up and slap him. If I could even summon the energy to sit up and slap him.

"I never thought this would happen, Babe. I thought you'd be with the cop. Thought it was for the best. You could have a normal, happy life. Live in the 'Burg." His hand brushed through my hair."Then you go and quit being afraid of me." He sighed. "What happened? What changed you so much in one night?"

Uh-oh… I'm asleep. I'm asleep. I am the pillow…

There was a long stretch of silence. I wondered if he was listening to my heart trying to kill itself. I kept my breathing even and remained silent.

It was better that he didn't know. Safer that way. I didn't like nice young men in clean white coats. He couldn't know. No, instead he knew something but nothing exact. He was guessing. Good, let it be a mystery. He had mystery. I ought to have some too.

Maybe I'd be Bat Girl after all. As long as I didn't turn into a flying monkey…