Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto and gang. Just playin' with 'em ;P. Any OCs you see in the story are mine.
Review Replies:
nishasha: Yes, he's four. And of course Iikagen's snazzy, he's awesome! :P
Dragon Man 180: What can I say, Lil' Naruto's weird!
darkangel68: Thanks :D
bhodi li: Don't' worry, the later chaps will have more Naruto in the foreground.
WaterBookLover
VentMonster: I think should have added a Humour Genre :P
Salsar Thiran: wtf wtf mate? :P
Nejidragon: Thank you!
Little Fox Kit
drunkdragon12888: What can I say, Iikagen's awesome. :D
animelvr4evr: Hmm….I don't know how :P
Notes: I'm so, so, so sorry about the spelling mistakes in the last chapter . . Hopefully it won't happen again. Anyway this chapter has some snazzy chakra techniques. I've researched , but incase I made any mistake in the lore, tell me please. Anyway, here's a question to you guys: If Naruto returns to Konoha as a genin, will you want him to go through the same events inbetween the genin and chunnin exams, or do you want something completely different. Just asking. Anywhoo, enjoy the next chapter!
Chapter Three: Mad training and Lazy gods.
Naruto growled as he crashed onto the shifting sands of Wind Country. A year had already passed since that day.
"Ugh," grunted Naruto as he inched deeper into the comforting shade.
It had been almost a month since he was dumped into the dry wasteland by his "brother".
"Hn, great brother he is," huffed Naruto as he started meditating to fight off the great thirst he was feeling.
He could still remember what happened in his first "training" in Fire Country.
Naruto found himself back in the chilling snow. Iikagen just sat down on the snow and looked at him for a while before speaking up.
"Ok, I've decided to start your training here."
Naruto became slightly excited as he asked, "What are we going to do, aniki?"
The deity merely closed his eyes.
Suddenly, the length of snow between Naruto and his mentor stretched and lengthened. The ground shuddered, cracks spreading through the dirt like the many tendrils of a spider web. Naruto gulped as he took a step back.
Suddenly, water bubbled up from the cracks. The fragments of dirt drifted slightly away from each other, before the dark-blue liquid engulfed them, forming a long strip of still, calm water that separated Naruto and Iikagen.
"Yo kid!" yelled Iikagen from the other side. "You have to walk on the water to my side! That's your training, twerp!"
"Walk on water?! Are you insane?!"
The deity rolled his eyes. "No you idiot! Your use your chakra!"
"Chakra?"
Iikagen narrowed his eyes. "You do know what chakra is right?"
"Eh. . .some sort of energy thingy that we have?"
Relieved that the blond wasn't a complete moron, the god replied, "Yeah. Now, you have to force your chakra through your feet in the right amount so that it lessens your weight till it cannot break through the water surface."
"Um. . .ok. . ." Naruto mumbled as he scratched his head.
As he was about to step on the water, Iikagen shouted again.
"Oi, not yet! I haven't laid down the conditions of this exercise!"
Suddenly, Naruto felt his body stiffened and sink slightly into the soft snow.
"First off, I made your body something akin to metal. It is now harder to move as your body's heavier and your joints are more difficult to bend. This is to train your stamina and chakra capacity.
"Secondly, for every time you plunge into the water, your body becomes even heavier and harder to move. Don't worry, you won't drown because after five seconds in the water you get teleported back to where to started from, but this should be a nice incentive for you to not drop into the water too many times.
"Lastly, a large blizzards gonna hit this place tomorrow. If you it here before it hits, I'll give you shelter. If not, you'll have to force chakra around your body to keep the cold out."
Naruto gaped.
"HEY! THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO DO!"
Iikagen just took out his book. "Ask the baka fox in you for help."
"BUT. . .ITS STILL IMPOSS---"
"Ramen. When you make it over here, I'll reward you with 100 cups of ramen."
"Ugh. . .too hot to meditate," muttered Naruto as he thought about his first training. Leaning back on a the dry bushes, he still remembered how he, after 3 days, finally crossed over the "river". He was frozen stiff and starving while the weight-metal thingy he had on him had already multiplied by about a hundred times.
Of course, before he could strangle Iikagen for putting him through that icy hell, the god shoved him into the tent, where a hundred cups of steaming ramen greeted his chilled soul.
It was like a gold vault.
A small smile appeared at that memory. "Argh, I'm too easily bribed with ramen, " he chuckled.
Like that time in Water Country. His aniki had doubled his metal weight, dumped him onto a small piece of land surrounded by acres of water. He was supposed to "use chakra to mold the air around you into a bubble that you can breathe from. Then, using that bubble, dive into the water to find a glowing orb stuck in the seabed and bring it up. If you're about drown, you'll get teleported back to the top with you metal-condition increased again."
Stupid Iikagen.
He was provided with 4 days worth of food and water. He took about 8 days to complete the task. Again, Iikagen rewarded him, this time with 150 cups of ramen.
Yet, as much as Naruto refused to acknowledge, the boy found it fun to beat his mentor's challenges. He found it satisfying when he managed to survive the god's crazy exercises, like. . .
. . .being dumped some forsaken swamp land in Earth Country with 9 days worth of food for a month. . .
. . .left in a volcano with a week's food supply and having to find a way out himself. . .
. . .dropped near a small twister and needing to run away from it. . .
Of course, he had to repeat the twister one four times before he actually succeeded.
Shaking himself out of his reverie, Naruto realised that the sun was setting.
Taking out a calendar, he realized that today was the last day of month.
". . .Use your chakra to protect yourself and hunt for food. I'll pick you up at midnight on the last night of the month. . ."
Finally! thought Naruto excitedly. Another 6 hours more!
The blond stood up determinedly. As he trekked across the orange sands to hunt for food, a thought rang out in his head, pushing him towards his goal.
6 hours more. . .TO RAMEN!
---
Iikagen deftly scooped up the last of his ice-cream from the plastic cup into his spoon, before eating it. It melted in his mouth. The deity savoured the cold vanilla taste for a while, before swallowing it.
Grunting, he threw the empty cup onto floor, where it quickly vanished into air.
Ah. . .gotta love the invisible cleaners of Tentou.
Leaning back onto the bench while closing his eyes, he spoke out in a lazy drawl.
"You may have been a ninja when you were alive, but I am, after all, a god. Don't try hiding."
After a few seconds, a blur leapt down from the overhead tree, landing gracefully beside Iikagen.
"Hn. I wondered how long it would take before you came and approached me."
The white-haired man merely shrugged, and gave a weak smile.
"You wish for something."
It was a statement. There was no anger in it, only a slight tinge of curiosity.
The shinobi scratched his hair, before saying a quick "Hai."
Iikagen opened his eyes and glanced at the ninja.
"I. . .wish for you to teach my son my move," he said.
"Is that all?"
"Hai."
"Hn. . .alright then," conceded the god. "When he is ready, I'll teach him."
At that, the man grinned, before bowing respectfully.
"Thank you."
"Hn. Whatever."
---
Naruto happily slurped up the last of his ramen. His aniki merely sat beside him, reading his book.
"Neh. . .Ika-aniki, will you teach me some cool jutsu now?"
The god sighed, and put away his book.
"Gah. . .fine."
"Wow. . .REALLY?!" exclaimed Naruto as he started jumping around in joy, kicking sand at Iikagen.
"Oi, stop kicking sand at me."
"YAY! JUTSU! JUTSU! JUTSU!"
"STOP KICKING SAND INTO MY FACE, BAKA!"
"Oh. . .heh," grinned Naruto sheepishly. "So. . .um, what am I gonna learn? Is it some cool move that destroys enemies with one hit? Or something that allows me to become someone else, huh, huh isit?"
"Actually. . .no. I don't know any ninjutsu or genjutsu."
Naruto blinked.
After a full minute, a loud cry could be heard across the whole of Wind Country.
"YOU WHAT?!"
"Calm down and let me explain, damnit. Anyway, as I was saying, I don't know any because both of them require seals. Of course, due to my awesomeness as a god, I don't need seals to do jutsu. I'm too awesome for that," shrugged Iikagen.
"STOP STROKING YOUR EGO!"
The deity rolled his eyes. "Anyway, instead of teaching you stupid jutsu which any mortal can do, I'm gonna teach you some chakra techniques."
"Chakra techniques?"
Nodding his head, Iikagen continued. "Watch carefully."
He held his right hand out.
"Now, know that you can force chakra out of body. The only reason you use seals is to use that chakra to create a certain effect.
"But, chakra at its raw, unaltered form is powerful in its own right. With the correct techniques, you can mould your raw chakra into a certain shape.
"The technique I'm showing you will be one of them. First, you concentrate on releasing chakra from the chakra holes in your forearm and your hand, like this."
A blue, wild energy seeped out the deity's hand. It was a furious maelstrom, snapping angrily at everything around it as it whirled around the god's hand.
"Control the energy. Tame it. Calm it. I'm not telling you how, because it's different for everyone. After you do that, it should become something like this."
The raging swirl of chakra subsided, leaving a smaller coat of shimmering blue blaze around the hand. It glimmered, its tendrils leaping up in a hypnotising dance.
"It looks like fire because that's the easiest element to manifest as."
Naruto just nodded as he stared at the pretty flame. "What. . .what can it do?" he mumbled, still entranced by the azure glow.
"Flick me a stone."
Shaking himself out of his fascination, Naruto quickly picked up a stone from the sandy floor, and threw it at his aniki.
Iikagen grabbed the stone.
The projectile exploded into a scattering storm of fine particles and dust. Shaking his hand, the remains of the stone tumbled out, most of it swept away in the desert wind.
"W-wow," stated Naruto. Then, a determined glint came to his eyes. "Hah! I bet I'll master this within a week!"
Rolling his eyes, Iikagen humoured the boy. "Right, right, I'm sure you will."
Beaming, Naruto stretched his hand out, eager to try the technique himself when the deity stopped him.
"Sleep. You can try it tomorrow when you're more refreshed."
"Meh. . .alright."
As Naruto turned away to grab his sleeping bag, the god spoke out again.
"Hey kid. I know you're disappointed that I can't teach you any jutsu, right? Well, what about this. Once, when jutsu were just being invented, there was a scroll which contains the Theory of Seals. Now, what you learn about seals in the academy is just one eighth of the complete theory. Now, if you can complete this chakra technique and improve your accuracy till there's an almost 100 chance to hit your target while moving, I'll lend you the scroll."
"Wow. . .wait, I thought you said it was lost."
"I have a complete collection of every book, scroll, manuscript that was ever published."
"Oh. . ."
"You have to do this within three months. That is your training."
"Hah! This is going to be easy! Be prepared to give me that scroll in a month!" yelled Naruto, giving a thumbs-up before burrowing into his sleeping bag.
"Hn. We'll see."