Warnings: Filler...getting there...really.

Spoilers: None

Feedback: Constructive feedback is very welcome

A/N: You get three short chapters...because I've gone off on a tangent again...oh dear...

Felis Catus: Circle Seventeen

"All right. So now we've got possibly evolving chimeras," Edward groaned feelingly. "What in the world was going through that mad alchemist's mind? I'm not going to ask if things can get any worse."

"You've just jinxed us, Boss!" Breda accused.

"Oh, shut up. We're already jinxed," Edward sighed.

Breda shrugged matter-of-factly. "Don't make it worse."

Edward snorted and shook his head.

"So what's our strategy for dealing with whatever chimera we're up against tonight?" Fury prompted. "It'd be kind of nice to know what we're going to do."

"Squash 'em," Havoc informed him.

"Be serious," Hawkeye scolded, almost reflexively.

"I am," Havoc retorted. "We've got a giant scorpion bug and a spider bug. Bugs squish. The end."

"Spiders aren't exactly bugs," Farman murmured.

Havoc looked ever so slightly exasperated. "Fine, arachnids, whatever!"

"I hate spiders," Edward muttered.

Roy's ears perked up. Really? He rather liked them. To burn, that is. The legs always went first. Yes, he was a curious child. Magnifying lenses, pre-alchemical fire, were wonderful things.

"You're forgetting the snake thingy," Farman said helpfully.

"Argh! Just kill 'em all," Havoc complained.

"As soon as you tell us how," Hughes said brightly.

"That's your job," Hawkeye informed him.

"Oh yeah, that's right. So what Intelligence, or in other words, I, since I am the nuts and bolts behind Intelligence..."

"Save the ego trip, Hughes - for when the Colonel's around to compete with," Edward rolled his eyes comically.

Roy felt a bit disgruntled. He wasn't really THAT conceited, now was he? He decided to ignore that.

Hughes winked and went on blithely. "...Was thinking was to concentrate on the types of animals we're looking for. Like you said, there's a snake, a scorpion and a spider. We've got to start thinking like those creatures."

"No thanks," Breda shuddered.

"It could save your life," Fury encouraged.

"No thanks," Breda repeated.

"So, snakes like warmth, scorpions like sand, spiders like dark corners."

"You're a world of information, Hughes," Edward said dryly. "There are dozens of species members of each of those three groups and each sub-species is slightly different."

Hughes laughed, but there was no humor in it. "I know. Believe me, I know. But from all of that information we've got to narrow it down to what all those subspecies have in common, relatively speaking."

"You're overlooking information," Edward protested.

Hughes shrugged, and looked seriously at Ed. "There's no other way though. We're working with very scant information in regards to species."

"So we're still pretty much on our own then," Havoc sighed.

"Yep," Hughes agreed cheerfully. "Only a few words of caution and advice: if you run into the snake, don't get within reach of her tentacles and try to keep the battle long distance if you can, because she can easily cover long distances and at close range she'll break your body in her coils like a dry twig. If you run into the scorpion, try to get to its underbelly; in theory it's softer and not covered with heavy plates. Also, don't get too close to that either because those pincers mean business and that thing can scuttle real quick. Don't ever forget there's a tail back there too. As for the spider...don't get stuck in her web. Spiders usually don't leave their webs if they don't have to, but they will leave webbing and tendrils around to catch prey and I'm almost positive this one will spit things at you."

"You put the light in our lives, Hughes," Breda commented dryly. "One hundred flavors of death, and counting!"

"I aim to please," Hughes replied flippantly. "Now get out there and get hunting."

"Aye!" They all saluted.

"Same teams as before," Armstrong instructed as everyone suited up. "But this time instead of splitting up the district as we did last night, I want us to use a radiating pattern. Since we're pretty much in the middle of Third District, what we'll do is patrol a fourth of the district and meet back here, then rotate so that all the areas get a thorough scouring by different sets of eyes."

"Wait a sec, Major - you're not thinking of going off alone with that injured arm, now are you?" Havoc asked.

Armstrong grinned and flexed his good arm. "I'll have you know I can still wrestle a bear one-handed."

"But you can't use your alchemy with one arm bandaged up like that," Edward protested. "You need to throw an object to hit the object and transmute it."

"Ah, do not worry so," Armstrong chided him. "An alchemist should know all the strengths and weaknesses of his techniques and how to compensate for physical injuries and balance everything out to achieve victory."

"Is that another tradition handed down many generations of Armstrongs?" Breda grinned.

Armstrong smiled back ruefully. "Alas, no - it is knowledge hard-earned through trial and error. Very terrible errors." He shrugged.

"You'll be okay on your own then?" Edward asked, still worried.

Roy sighed. You're wasting your worrying, Edward, he thought drolly. That man isn't human. He's a solid mass of muscle; I don't even know where he's got room for that clever mind of his. The only thing bigger than his muscles is his heart. He's not going to let man-eating chimeras run free on his turf while he's still breathing, arm or no arm.

"I will be fine, young Elric. Worry about your ribs," Armstrong smiled and raised an eyebrow.

"Rib, singular," Edward stuck out his tongue. "It's much better. I can still clap; I just need to be careful not to get slammed into anything," he sighed.

"No close combat for you, Eddie boy," Hughes grinned. Roy snickered.

"Don't call me Eddie boy," Edward growled. "And I don't want to get up close and personal with any of those remaining chimeras, thank-you-very-much. They smell bad." Ed wrinkled his nose.

"Alchemists," Hawkeye sighed, rolling her eyes yet again. "Good thing Colonel Mustang's not here or he'd probably be injured too and pretending it's nothing. It must be a male deficit disorder or something."

It was Roy's turn to roll his eyes. Hmmm. This from the woman who was hit on the head with a flying piece of shrapnel, refused all aid, staggered back to her post and still managed to hit her target before finally letting the medics treat her? Sure. Male deficit disorder his tail!

"All right, are all the 'be carefuls' and 'don't over do yourself honeys' done yet?" Hughes asked. Everyone nodded. "Great. So let's move out," he ordered. "Ta ta my darlings!"

"Shut up, Hughes," everyone chorused automatically.

They all gave Hughes and Hawkeye a quick salute before they started trooping down the stairs, Havoc and Fury exiting first and heading off into their quadrant with Breda and Farman close behind before they branched off into theirs. Armstrong gave Edward a small salute before he went off into the third quadrant. Edward spared the inside of the clock tower one last look before closing the gate behind him.

"I still wish the Colonel was here," Ed muttered to his cat. "I've got a feeling we're really going to miss not having him here tonight."

Roy shivered. He got that same feeling too.

To be con't...