Well my little munchkins. Ideas come from the strangest places. They just go POP and voila you are there and typing away getting square eyes in front of the computer. This chapter was written with the help of my strange, blonde and ridiculously clumsy friend cheesiewheezies ("Slipknot rocks my wok," says me! Me being cheesiewheezies) we shall mention possums in this chapter-thanx to cheesiewheezies's geniousness, they have a special meaning to her and she has some great experiences with them. Fish Stix Satay- if you don't like this chapter sue me. HA! Also read the review from cheesiewheezies on chapter 5, very interesting stuff. Cheesiewheezies- Usher and Maroon 5 are C-R-A-P! (This is just my personal opinion no offence) so on we go my fellow comrades…… Fishstixsatay
P.S. don't forget those reviews they help and I really appreciate knowing what you think about my story.
A few days later…
Well after my wonderful wee killer-breath episode I was relieved to flop onto my marshmallow bed and reflect on the past few disastrous days. Whoop de frigging doo. Now I have the joy of being hated by the second eldest Weasley, and I don't love my old love anymore. I don't think the killer-breath helped with Bill – he now makes an "x" whenever I walk into the same room as him and if he has to be in the same room as me for more than 10 minutes he pulls a bloody peg out of his pocket! Phucking hell! What's that weanies problem! God, I don't even care anymore. He can just go and suck his brothers big, juicy cockadoodledoo goes the rooster out in the garden.
I feel like chicken. Cluck, cluck, cluck goes the itty-bitty chicken!
Wait no… I actually don't feel like chicken I feel like sushi. I could eat my body weight in sushi.
SHIT! The ovens still on! Ovens shouldn't be called ovens they should be called oovens. Like you say the o's in rooster. An ooven. O yeah right… SHIT! The oovens still on!
Running and tripping over every possible object I quickly yet slowly made my way down the seven cluttered flights of stairs to the kitchen. It was r-o-a-s-t-i-n-g baby! Shimmy shimmy cocoa pops.
OH ---MY--- GOD! The ooven's on fire! What am I going to do! Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit! Ok, just think. How do you put out a fire? I could try that spell that Tonks taught me the other day, and she said there was some sort of explosive spell really similar. Like, almost identical. Probably be best not to risk it, because with me being me I'm bound to do the explosive one.
GODDAMN IT! I just got another one of those clickey thingies. Everything is suddenly clear. I've just figured out what I need to do. I need….
WHIPPED CREAM! It's the solution to all fires.
Running towards the whipped cream cupboard (who doesn't have one!) I tripped over a pickled onion jar and found myself flying towards Sirius's antique lamp (yes he does own antiques) I found myself t-h-i-n-k-i-n-g and realised that this was the wrong time to think. I whipped out my wand and yelled the first thing that popped into my head…
"HOLY CHEESE GROWING FLOWERS"
Then I found myself hurtling towards a barrier of CHEESE GROWING FLOWERS! Now don't get me wrong I am usually quite the cheese lover but there is a time and a place and it was neither at this present moment in time! CRASH
What was I doing before this? I was going to the all-necessary whipped cream cupboard to get some… whipped cream! Why did I want whipped cream, anyway? It's so… random. I like that word. Random. Oh yeah, that's why I wanted the whipped cream. I was going to put out a fire on the ooven. OH MY GOD, THE OOVEN'S ON FIRE!
Hey maybe the cheese would work… I could put it in a bowl in the microwave and melt in the microwave for a while 5 minutes or so. Oh yeah but I'm rushing coz there's a FIRE!
Later
After I had dealed with the very small miniscule problem in the kitchen that no one needs to know about… A racoon got into the kitchen… hmm… yes… they're really creepy, because they have small hands argh! How creepy is that I mean…SMALL HANDS!
Well after the incident with the 'racoon' I thought that maybe I could actually go to bed. Going to bed is a very good idea. I haven't done that, since, well, this morning.
So, I slowly trekked up the seven flights of cluttered stairs, carefully tripping over every possible thing (again), and crawled into my bed.
"Goodnight, Snivellus. Don't forget to sleep in past dawn, you stupid rat with wings." I said to my little pet phoenix.
Sleep was just starting to take hold of me. I never new that my bed could be so comfortable. The soft, fluffy, squishiness absorbing my body like sinking into a big fluffy white cloud. S-l-o-w-l-y d-r-i-f-t-i-n-g…u-p- -u-p- -a-n-d- -a-w-a-y…
Tap tap tap tappety tap tap tap……
What in the name of Satan is that? "Snivellus? This isn't funny. You were just outside two frigging minutes ago!" I said, my voice groggy with half-sleep. I got a squeak in reply from Snivellus. He wasn't at the window? I went over to the window and pushed back the curtain and saw……seven little possums with their faces and creepy tiny hands pressed up against my bedroom window. Their big round eyes glowing at me like car headlights. Their small sticky fingers placed on either side of their faces watching, waiting, never blinking, never budging. They were FREA-KING me out.
"AAAARRRGGHH!" they were out to get me, I know it. All the small-handed creatures are coming! First the racoons, now the possums. What next? Squirrels and chipmunks?
Suddenly a plan began to form in my head. If it had been a decent hour then I would be thinking look at the little iddey biddey possums! They are sooo cutesy wutesy! I want to keep them all! Awwww…but then again they do have those freaky wee hands…
But this was an INSANE HOUR and I wanted some fecking sleep! So my evil plan for these horrible creatures that disturbed my rest formed. They need to die. I will lure them into my house…lock them in a small room until they starve and then…skin them to make NIPPLE WARMERS! It's a great plan I could make some mega bucks and get some decent sleep!
Don't know what'll happen next, but what I had planned has gone out the window, up the spout, completely disappeared, gone, impossible to have happen. Put a random word in your reviews, and you never know, it could give cheesiewheezies or me a fabulous idea that will end up being 20 pages (knowing me, this will never happen but I could potentially do four pages of story with a good idea!)
No animals were harmed in the making of this chapter, (excluding perhaps a cat or two that had its tail stepped on) :) FishStixSatay and Cheesiewheezies )