Chapter Three: Nothing Mattered

Alicia

"Hey, would you get that?" My cousin Carlos asked Hazel as I continued running around trying not to get sprayed with anymore water. I loved times like these. They reminded me of my childhood before my parents split and everything got so crazy.

"I've got you now!" My uncle yelled, throwing a bucket of water on me as a screamed. "Sorry." He apologized, which was completely unlike him.

"You have a guest." Hazel came up to me as I turned around to see Craig. He always snuck up on me like that.

"Hey, you." I looked at him, my eyes smiling. He was just as soaked as I was. "Served you right for trying to sneak up on me." I walked into the house as Craig followed. "Want something to drink?"

"No."

"Something to eat?" I tried again.

"I'm okay."

"Then, why are you here? This is supposed to be a party." I grabbed a strawberry crystal light out of the refrigerator for me and handed one to Craig anyway.

"I don't know. C-Can we just … talk?" He wondered as I nodded.

"There are a ton of people, so the only quiet place is in my room. You don't mind do you?" I wondered, not really thinking straight.

"Yeah." Craig took a sip of his crystal light nervously.

"So, why did you change your mind? Having problems with Ashley?"

"No." Craig answered a little too quickly. "I love Ash. It's just that we're trying to get this demo together and she doesn't want to listen to anything I have to say. She might as well go solo because it's all about her."

"Wow." I bit my lip. "You guys do have issues."

"No. It's not like that. I just wanted to get away from the stress of … that." He admitted.

"And bring some stress into my life. Thanks." I smiled fakely. "You can sit on my bed. I don't care."

"But I'm wet." He protested.

"Do you see anywhere else to sit?" I asked. "The floor's always available."

"Hold on." Craig stood up, regretfully taking a call.

Jimmy

"Hello?" I heard Hazel's voice on the other line. She sounded really … together.

"Hazel." I whispered. "I love you."

"But not enough to keep what was sacred between us between us." Hazel was instantly annoyed.

"Where are you? I want to see you."

"I don't want to see you. Give me time." Hazel sounded really vulnerable and sad, not how I wanted to make her feel. I had done this to her.

"Is there anything I can do?" I begged.

"Just stop calling … please." The dial tone followed as I decided to call up Craig for some advice. He had cheated on Ashley and gotten her back and they were better than ever. He picked up his phone on the first ring and we made a flawless plan to make her understand that I loved her. Hopefully, Hazel would have a change of heart, and soon.

Craig

"So, umm … why did you leave and why did you come back? I heard about your mom and your step dad." I began.

"That is not a story you want to know. Trust me. I don't even want to know about it." Alicia sighed. "In short, my mom and dad got divorced and she tried to get me back." I closed my eyes, exhaling deeply. "I really…"

"It's okay." Craig lightly stroked my back as I stood up suddenly.

"So, you're bipolar?"

"You're mom's schizophrenic?" He shot back.

"She was a druggie and all her years of addiction backfired. But when she came back and tried to be a mom for once, I couldn't not help her. So here I am."

Manny aka Alicia

"Look, I can't stand anymore of this mushy gush out for feelings thing. I'm going to get out of these clothes." I pulled off my mini jacket as Craig started to squirm. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's just that this is a completely non-platonic situation." He explained.

"The door is open Craig. What more do you want? Normal people get changed in their rooms." I rolled my eyes. "You want a heart to heart? You know the reason why I just can't say screw you and forget you ever existed?" I paused taking in a deep breath.

"When I see you, I see what I want for myself. You have like all the … qualities that I want in a boyfriend, but I know it's not going to work because you screwed me over." I practically yelled. "I should throw you out on your soaking wet ass right now, but I can't do that." I sat down, disappointed in myself. "I even came back with this badass attitude at Degrassi and nothing's changed. When I see you … you know what, forget it."

"I want to hear what you have to say." Craig stopped me as if he were flattered.

"You know you and I can't just be friends." I began, wanting to feel like someone cared about me again.

"That's all I can g--" I cut him off with a kiss. "Manny." He began to protest.

"Alicia." I kissed him again. "Just … don't say anything. It won't be serious and I won't get attached. Not like last time." I continued kissing Craig as he stopped resisting and started giving in, like he used to. "It'll just be like … friends with benefits." He nodded and I wasn't sure if he was listening or anything.

JT

"So, what are you thinking about?" Liberty asked, turning towards me in my mom's hammock.

"You." I lied. I had learned a long time ago, that that was the only correct answer. If I told Liberty that I was feeling really bad about how we were treating Manny, she would throw a fit and accuse me of liking her again.

"So, what do you think about that choreography project Kwan assigned us? Crazy huh? I guess since Dracula was such a hit, we're going to be directing all of Degrassi's future performing arts shows."

"Uh-huh." I nodded, remembering how sad Manny seemed. She was trying to play it cool by using her supermodel 'Alicia' name and image, but all of her friends could see right through it, and she was hurting.

"Are you even listening?' Liberty chimed in again, ruining my thoughts again. I never knew that one person could talk so much.

"I am but, don't you ever feel bad about not being friends with Emma and Manny anymore? It's weird without them."

"No, I don't and you shouldn't either. Emma is a liar and a backstabber, and Manny's changed too much." Liberty held onto me tighter when she mentioned Manny.

"She's not trying to steal me away or anything. I just think we should help her."

"And befriend Emma in the process. That's too much good for me." Liberty sat up. "I think this night is officially killed."

"What? Liberty, come on." I shook my head as she started to pick up her bookbag.

"We haven't accomplished anything anyway."

Craig

"No. Wait." Alicia protested, lightly pushing me off of her. "This isn't right."

"Says who?" I resumed kissing her, nibbling on her stomach. She was so beautiful, and vulnerable, and real which made me want her even more.

"Look, this is wrong. I need to check on my mother, Hazel's down there, and I just can't do this." She sat up, holding the sheets close to her.

"Fine." I growled angrily. She lured me into her room and waited until things got hot and heavy to set him down.

"Craig, don't be mad." She begged. "Just understand where I'm coming from." I slipped on my boxers as Manny walked over to her dresser, with her back still turned to me.

"How can I not be? I thought we were doing the friends with benefits thing."

"But then I thought about Ashley and what I did to her. I respect Ashley. I don't want to ruin your relationship." Alicia explained, fully clothed now.

"But you're not. We're in high school and we're both going off to college this year. I don't want things to get too serious. You know what I mean? I don't want to have to lose her when I go to the states." Craig sighed.

"So, you're pushing her away? Smart move." Alicia shook her head. "Guys are really more clueless than I thought."

"But, it's not like I don't love her--"

"I get that, but why are you here with me?" Alicia questioned, interested as I started to put his wet clothing back on. "Why do you keep coming back?"

"That's what I keep asking myself." I cupped her face, kissing her tenderly.

"My cousin has some … some clothes. I'll get them and …" I tried to kiss her again, but she backed away. "I need to go see my mom."

"I'll come with you." I offered as she reluctantly led me into a room where her mother lay strapped in one of the straightjackets to her bed. I pulled back a little as Manny shook her head at me in disbelief.

"I thought you would understand, but no one gets it." I watched Manny stroke her mother's hair and whisper some things to her, as if trying to get her to calm down before giving her some medication. "Why don't you just go?" She wondered, as her mother calmed down and Manny removed the straightjacket. "Your sisters are here mom, don't you want to see them?" She carefully led her mother out of the room, not even acknowledging my presence anymore.

"Manny!" I called as she paused and turned around.

"If you can't handle being around my mom, then you can't handle any type of relationship with me."

(A/N: Can I get some type of response? I know people have been visiting the links to my story, so review and show some type of respect and gratitude. Reviews and feedback will make me a better writer, thus making the story more interesting … make sure to tell me what you want to see happen … who you want to hear about!—NL)