Peace (1 ?)
Dedicated to Vain

What would Shori think if he ever came here? Yuuri didn't care where this thought came from, and he ran with it. He might like it.

How would he react if he met Gwendal? Honestly, Yuuri didn't have a clue. They were similar, sort of, so they could be friends. Gunter… he didn't want to consider that, really.

Wolfram… Shori would like Wolfram, he thought. Maybe once Shori got over the shock of him being his… fiancé and all.

And Conrad… he knew that Shori would like Conrad. Who doesn't? He's sweet, handsome, compassionate—

"Heika?" Conrad himself asked. "You didn't catch my pitch… are you alright?"

Yuuri blinked. He looked to the ground, where the baseball lay at his feet. He suddenly remembered that he was playing catch with Conrad. "I'm perfectly alright, Conrad!" he picked the ball up. "I was just thinking about my brother Shori." He threw the ball.

Conrad caught it. "Do you miss him?"

"A little," Yuuri admitted, "He's overprotective and scary, but he's my brother, you know? But I was thinking about what he'd think if he met you guys."

Conrad chuckled. "What would he think of me?"

"He'd like you!" Yuuri perked up. "Of course he'd like you, who doesn't?"

Conrad looked down for a moment before wearing a slightly tight smile. "Plenty of people don't. But I'm honored you think so highly of me, Heika."

Yuuri was perplexed. The thought of not liking Conrad was foreign to him. "Those people are silly, then," he pouted, "And my name is Yuuri, Man-Who-Named-Me."

"Of course, Yuuri," he replied with a small smile, "And those people are not silly. Many of them have valid reasons for disliking me, Yuuri. Like my betrayal."

Yuuri looked annoyed. "But… I thought we cleared that all up! You were doing it for a good cause! They can't possibly still hold that against you!"

Conrad shook his head and sighed. His smile was slightly pained. "Your forgiveness doesn't mean that everyone forgives me, Heika." He gazed up at the sky, noting that it was becoming darker. "Come on, Heika, it's getting late."

He pouted, wanting to argue, but he obediently followed Conrad into the castle, and the subject died. Yuuri found himself feeling very worried about him, and swore to do something about it.

"Hey Yozak," Yuuri asked hesitantly, "You're Conrad's best friend, right?"

Yozak had some time off that day, so he had visited Conrad and Yuuri. Now he was sitting with Yuuri. He appeared somewhat stricken at the question. "…Yes. You could say that."

That flew over Yuuri's head. "Good! Then you can tell me what to do! You see, I was talking to him yesterday, and he still seems to be upset!" He pouted. "He shouldn't be upset."

Yozak laughed. "It's in Conrad's nature to be upset."

Yuuri completely ignored that. "I already forgave him for that, and he's still hurting himself over it! That's not right!" His voice trembled. "Does my forgiveness mean nothing?"

Yozak looked pensive—almost like he was battling something—before continuing. "It's not that it means nothing, Yuuri-heika, it's just that he hasn't forgiven himself yet."

"Oh," he still looked dejected. "But what can I do about it?"

"You can't make him change his mind, Yuuri. No one can," Yozak said somberly, "But you can cheer him up," he finished with a wicked grin.

"Really? I can?" Yuuri was eager.

"Yes," Yozak said, his eyes mischievous, "The best way to show someone that you forgive them and care about them is to kiss them!"

"K-Kiss him!" Yuuri gaped. "I-I… I can't do that!"

"Why not?" Yozak asked, looking perfectly innocent. "Do you not love him?"

"Of course I do!" he said indignantly, "But… a kiss… really? Would that make him happy?"

"From you?" Yozak said, somewhat melancholy, "Yes, it would."

"Are you okay? You look a little nervous." Conrad asked as they were playing catch again.

Yuuri was nervous. He didn't know whether to take Yozak's words to heart. After all, he was Conrad's best friend, but he could have been joking. But what if that was the only way to make him happy?

Maybe he had blown this all out of proportion. "I'm fine! Perfect, really," Yuuri said, "Not nervous at all, nosiree. Why would I be nervous?"

Conrad narrowed his eyes, frowning. "You still seem to be nervous," he noted, "What's troubling you?"

"You," Yuuri said, before rushing to correct himself, "No no no, you haven't done anything wrong at all! I've just been worried about you."

"Worried?" Conrad seemed puzzled, "There is no reason to concern yourself over me, Heika."

"It's Yuuri!" he shouted for the umpteenth time, "And yes, there is! You still don't forgive yourself and you're hurting yourself over it!"

"Yuuri…" Conrad said softly.

"I know that there isn't much I can do about that though," he said bitterly, "No matter what I say, you'll still do it."

"Yuuri, please don't pin any blame on yourself," Conrad said quickly, "It's just that I—"

"I wish I accept that, but I can't," Yuuri said, "But I talked to Yozak. He said that I could at least cheer you up."

"Yuuri, you always cheer me up," Conrad said with a sweet smile, "Just being with you does that."

Something inside Yuuri completely melted at the man's words. And he realizes that Conrad has been good to him—really good to him—but Yuuri has never been particularly good to Conrad. This strengthened his resolve to go through with his plan. "I'm glad, really glad that's true, Conrad. But… he told me of another way to make you happy."

Conrad's eyes flashed between intrigue and concern. "That's really not necessary, Heika."

"But…" Yuuri looked into Conrad's eyes and felt something warm consume him, and the thought that it was right flashed across his mind. "I want to." He stepped closer to the man, and before Yuuri could lose his courage he leaned up and kissed him.

It was nice, soft and warm, but Yuuri quickly realized that the other wasn't responding. In fact, the other man had completely tensed up. Yuuri grew even more worried. What if he had been wrong? What if Yozak had been joking? He broke the kiss. "I'm sorry, Conrad—I should've asked first—God, I'm stupid—I'm going to leave now—I'm sorry!" Yuuri blurted before dashing away.

"You told him to kiss me?"

"Well, yeah, but I didn't think that he'd actually go through with it!"

Yuuri was in a place not very many people would expect him to be. He had never been a fan of books if they didn't concern baseball, and since Conrad knew this he figured that this was the perfect hiding place.

Conrad knew better than that, apparently.

When Conrad strolled into the library, Yuuri grabbed the nearest book to him and hid his face in it. Unfortunately for him, it was The Joy of Gay Sex.

"What an interesting reading selection, Heika," Conrad said with thinly veiled amusement.

"Huh? What are you—" Yuuri checked the cover and dropped it in shock. "Gah! I wasn't reading that! I'd never read that!"

"Never?" Conrad teased.

Yuuri shook his head vigorously, and Conrad chuckled. Then Yuuri remembered why he was in the library in the first place. He edged away from Conrad, looking for an escape route. "Well, it's best that I leave now—"

"Heika, wait," Conrad said, "We should talk."

"Talk? But there's nothing to talk about!" He laughed nervously as Conrad moved closer.

"I think we both know there is," Conrad said gently, "Come on, Yuuri. Let's talk in private." Conrad took Yuuri's wrist, and Yuuri grumpily followed him out of the library. Conrad led him to his room. He sat down on the bed, and Yuuri followed. "I don't ever want you to think that what you say doesn't mean anything," Conrad began sternly, "Your forgiveness means more to me than you'll ever know."

"Then why…"

"However, I find it hard to accept," Conrad explained, "I don't deserve it."

This enraged him. "Don't deserve it! Of course you do! You didn't kill me when ordered to, you saved us, and Shinou ordered you to do it!"

Conrad looked away. "But I held you at sword point… I betrayed Shin Makoku…"

"Stop it." Yuuri commanded in his hardest voice, and he grabbed Conrad's face so they'd be looking eye to eye. "I told you already, they were for a good cause."

"And I left you," Conrad said, "I know I caused you a lot of pain. That is unforgivable."

"You came back," Yuuri said unwaveringly, "That's all that matters."

Conrad smiled a smile that appeared to be a genuine one. Then he blinked at their closeness. "And about that kiss…"

Yuuri blanched and let his hands fall from Conrad's face, and scooted away a little. "Yeah?"

"If you're just trying to cheer me up, you don't have to kiss me, you know," Conrad said, amused.

This bothered Yuuri, for some reason. He knew that he should be happy that that's the case, but instead he felt sad. "Why doesn't that make me happy?" he murmured to himself.

Conrad gasped quietly. "Yuuri…?"

"I don't know," Yuuri admitted, searching for answers while staring at Conrad. He was feeling weird, fuzzy feelings towards him. He was a handsome, loyal, kind, compassionate, fun… simply amazing man. He took Conrad's face again in his hands and leaned forward to claim an eager, desperate yet heartfelt kiss. This time, Conrad caressed his face and sweetly returned the kiss, before breaking it.

"Yuuri," Conrad said, "I can't do this. Not when you are uncertain."

"I think I want this," Yuuri whispered, letting a hand fall to clutch Conrad's chest. "This feels right."

"But you are engaged to Wolfram," Conrad countered, "I cannot hurt my brother."

"So you'll hurt me again?" Yuuri retorted, before wincing. "Sorry. That was a cheap shot." He sighed. "I don't know what to do with him. I don't want to hurt him, either."

"Maybe we should give each other some space," Conrad suggested.

"I suppose," he leaned forward to give Conrad another chaste kiss before leaving. Yuuri didn't know what would happen next, but for now he felt blissfully at peace.