Updated: Monday 14th March 2005
Disclaimer: Where else? Chapter one of course:P
Chapter Forty Eight: Missing Moments, Magical Musings…
By the time Hermione, Harry and the Weasleys even arrived at Kings Cross Station, Estella was already on the train. While she was reluctant to leave London and part with Remus for the longest time she'd ever been apart from him, Estella was nonetheless overly excited about starting Hogwarts.
After waking up hours before their alarms had been set to go off, Remus had shrunk Estella's things and treated her to breakfast at a nice, nearby eatery that they had come to love. Then they walked the relatively short distance to the station, arriving 40 minutes before the train was set to depart. With both parties feeling more and more emotional the longer they drew things out, it was decided to get the goodbyes over with early, to enable Estella time to explore the train, find herself a seat, and compose herself before the other students started arriving in droves.
It is here that we find Estella seated alone in a carriage near the front of the train, the last of her bittersweet tears drying on her face as she gazed unseeingly out the window at the increasingly busy platform. As she absently took in the sight of parents arriving with their children, eager and organised in ensuring that they got to the station on time and yet reluctant to let their precious progeny go until it was absolutely necessary, the void in Estella's life threatened to swallow the forlorn child whole. Though she was entirely grateful for having such a formidable mind as her uncle to guide her through her life, and it went without saying she loved her Godfather to a fault, as she watched the students with their parents she ached insatiably for the one thing she could never have.
Sure, she had carved a tidy little family unit for herself consisting of her Uncle and her Godfather, it wasn't the same as what the other children had. First and foremost, Estella was blossoming into a young lady. Though she wasn't feeling it quite yet, there would come a time in the future where her rapidly changing physicality would pull her father-figures up short, and she will come to bear the brunt of having no female role model in her life. Still, she made do with what she had – which was quite a lot to work with when she considered it thoughtfully – and it was only on significant moments like this that her conscious mind ever thought to think of what things could have been like if her mother hadn't died in childbirth and her father hadn't gone off the rails.
Ever since the day she'd uncovered the portrait of her parents, Estella had caught herself thinking about them more and more often. Though she knew – like any self respecting Wizarding child would – that the personality imprinted on a magical portrait was at the artist's bequest and readily subject to inaccuracy, the contradictory image the portrait had captured unnerved Estella to no end. She could still feel the love in her mother's eyes covert her with unconditional acceptance… and then there was her father. Her father. He seemed so carefree and jovial; and his portrayed self clearly seemed deeply in love with her mother and absolutely stoked at the prospect of parenthood. Their voices – voices she had heard for the first time - still resonated in her head, and she was beyond confused. She had known that her father was nice to those he cared about and was only evil and mean to those he intended to hurt, but it just seemed unconceivable that a man could be so two faced. Then again, her Uncle was a spy for Dumbledore and did lord knows what in his duties as one of the Dark Lord's servants 'to save face'; and then for one night a month her caring, gentle, compassionate Godfather transformed into something so inherently evil and violent that maybe anything was possible.
If only the men in Estella's life didn't all have to be leading double lives – she'd be able to figure them out a whole lot easier.
Tearing her eyes away from the now busy platform, Estella sought a distraction. Pulling her new wand out of a pocket in her robes (she had changed as soon as she got on the train) she twirled the polished new wood in her hands and thought back to the day she got it.
Flashback
"Ah, Miss Snape." Mr Ollivander said before he had even turned to see who had walked into the store. "I was wondering when I would be seeing you."
Estella looked at Remus for reassurance, who smiled slightly and edged her forward.
"Remus Lupin." The old man continued, noticing the werewolf's presence. "Willow, 12 inches with the hair of the dog that bit you…" He said, considering the younger man for a moment. "Appropriate, yes, quite appropriate…. Rather swishy if I recall. Good for charm work and personal defence, hmmm?"
Remus dug his hands into his pocket, toying with the handle of said wand uncomfortably. "Yes, yes. It has served me well."
"Uncle Remus, I thought you couldn't… a dog…?" Estella pulled her Godfather down to whisper urgently in his ear.
"Ah," Remus said nervously. "I do believe Mr Olllivander was referring to a Muggle saying rather than implying I was actually attacked by a dog."
Mr Ollivander took in the pair before him and found the appropriate point to interrupt. "Your Uncle is doing well, I trust child?" Mr Ollivander asked, unsuccessfully trying to satisfy his curiosity as to the child's guardian's whereabouts. When he got no answer he added. "Such a shame what happened to your parents. It seems like only yesterday that they were in here buying their first wand." Seeing Estella's thirsty look, he smiled knowingly and continued. "I see you have them with you now. A inflexible blackwood 8 inch with Unicorn hair core I had been trying for years to sell chose the young Miss Snape if I do recall correctly."
"I've found it good for Charms. It was my Mother's best field too." Estella said.
"Not very often does a wand choose a wizard who has already found strengths in the wand of another. How very interesting." Ollivander said.
Estella looked at Ollivander warily. "Excuse me, but I would like to purchase a wand sometime before the apothecary closes."
Ollivander smiled widely – which was a scary sight. "Why, I do believe your Uncle said the same thing when he came in for his wand! Excellent wand for hexes and shields if I do recall." Ollivander recalled. "Now which is your wand arm?"
Estella held out her right arm and watched, intrigued, as the measuring tape magically unravelled and shifted around her arm, measuring everything from all conceivable angles.
"I see you have bonded with the wands of your parents." Ollivander said, summoning the measuring tape. "Your Father's wand in particular… Supple. Holly, 11inch… Dragon Heartstring" Ollivander said wistfully "I think I know precisely the right wand for you." He said gleefully.
The man tottered off to the back of the store, leaving Estella and Remus to stare at each other in bewilderment. Before they could trade words, however, the wand maker had returned bearing an extremely old and dusty box.
"Here." He said reverently, removing the lid and gingerly extracting its contents from inside, holding it out to Estella. "Blackwood, 10 inches. Dragon Heartstring."
No sooner had Estella made contact with the handle of the wand, was she overwhelmed with a flood of electrifyingly warmth. Her whole body tingled with magical energy, and the wand itself glowed. Estella knew from what her Uncle had told her that she would bond more completely with the wand that specifically chose her, but this was more than she had ever imagined. It was like an old pair of boots that fit extremely well… or like the magically charmed-to-fit socks Dumbledore handed out like lemon drops at Christmas time.
"Wow!" Estella and Remus had exclaimed simultaneously.
"Remarkable, truly remarkable." Ollivander said, clasping his hands together. "Very rarely is a wand maker so thoroughly rewarded by a perfect fit!"
"Perfect fit?" Estella asked dumbly, her body still adjusting to the draw of the wand.
"I suspect it's to do with the bond you've established with your parent's wands. Your magic is sufficiently more mature and receptive than most buying their first wand." Ollivander explained. "Still… this is very interesting indeed."
"What is 'very interesting indeed'?" Estella asked, getting a little unnerved by the man's demeanour.
"That your wand is born of the very same tree as that of your mother's wand." Ollivander said reverently. "And the dragon that supplied your wand its core yielded heartstrings for one other." Ollivander explained, waiting for the puzzle to piece together for the child. "Yes, child. Your father."
"Oh, great." Estella said, unsure how to take the news. Then, something in a long-forgotten potions reading raised the question. "But for a Dragon to give up more than one heartstring wouldn't it be dead? I thought it was only safe for Dragons to only yield one?"
"I see your Uncle has you well versed in your magical properties." Ollivander beamed. "Yes you are quite right, child. The dragon who bequested his heartstrings did in fact die. Draco was a very old, very wise dragon who passed over defending Hogwarts from attack during the Goblin revolutions. He was the founder's inspiration for the school motto and his very essence lives on in the protective wards around the school."
Remus looked at Estella's wand with big eyes. "You mean to say Estella and Sirius share the same core and that core comes from… I thought that was only a myth! And why were the wands only sold so very recently and not hundreds of years ago?"
"Draco, as he was best known, did in fact exist, long ago." Ollivander said. "And you should know by now Mr Lupin, that the wand chooses the wizard."
Estella nodded slowly. "But what does it all mean, sir?" She asked. "That I share my wand's properties with my parents?"
Ollivander gazed at Estella regretfully. "I means you were destined to forge a great bond with your parents." He said gravely.
"Well, uh, my Uncle will simply delight in that information." Estella said sarcastically, falling back into the familiar warmth of her Godfather's steadying form as the alpha wizard's chest rumbled slightly in mirth.
"But doesn't Harry Potter share his…" She said after few moments thought.
Ollivander looked at Estella sharply. "A unfortunate consequence of the curse cast on him as an infant." Ollivander hypothesised. "The boy's magic absorbed the signature of his attacker when he-who-shall-not-be-named was felled."
"Oh." Estella said. 'And this coincidence here could merely be because I've used my parents wands for years, you dolt! 'Great bond' indeed!' She completed in her mind.
"How much do we owe you for the wand?" Remus asked politely from behind her.
end flashback.
"Excuse me? Hello?" A high pitched voice stirred Estella from her thoughts. The train was moving.
'When had that happened?' Estella wondered as she rubbed the kink out of her neck and looked at the newcomer blankly.
The girl in question brushed her loose, waist-length dirty blonde hair out over he shoulder and stared at her with sunken grey eyes; a permanently fixed look of surprise on her face. "Don't suppose I could sit in here? The other compartments are too full."
The girl sat down without waiting for a response from Estella, a necklace of butterbeer bottle caps rattling and shaking as she did. Estella tilted her head to observe the strange newcomer, taking in her casual blue robes and eccentricities.
'Apparently a pureblood' Estella assessed, logically concluding that a Muggleborn or a half-blood would have a) had sense to wear Muggle clothes when arriving to Kings Cross since only Purebloods seemed to go to the trouble and expense of port keys and b) A Muggleborn would definitely not have had access to so many bottles of Butterbeer.
"How many bottles of Butterbeer did you have to drink to make that necklace?" Estella asked, intrigued.
"Only 164." The girl recited by rote. "I collected every cap from every bottle I drank over the Summer. I wanted to have something to remember the Summer by."
"Oh." Estella said, raising her eyebrows in surprise. Then, holding out her wrist where her Reading Festival wristband was clinging for dear life, she concluded. "I kept this."
At the girl's blank look Estella continued. "It's an admittance wristband for a wicked Muggle Music Festival in Berkshire that my Godfather took me to over the weekend." She said, flicking her wild mane of hair out of her face. She hadn't cut it all Summer. "It was his going away present to me, though I think it made him go grey. It was wild! Kept it on to show my Uncle when I got to school… I'm Estella Black by the way."
The blond-haired girl accepted the hand Estella was incidentally holding out and shook it in introduction. "Luna Lovegood." She said. "Say, my father has written some articles on your Dad in his magazine. He's the editor of The Quibbler."
"Never heard of it." She said truthfully. "My Uncle only ever subscribes to The Daily Prophet and some Potions Periodicals. Sorry."
"That's right, Severus Snape is your Uncle." She said, nodding incessantly. "My father interviewed him at your parents wedding. He's kept every single issue he's edited and I catalogue them every Summer."
"Oh," Estella said, wary of the bubbly girl and somewhat perturbed with the idea that her parents had a 'society wedding'.
"For what it's worth, The Quibbler never believed Sirius Black was guilty." She said. "My father prides himself on what other's don't. Even when it's controversial."
Estella glared at the girl in shock. "But he was guilty!" She blurted. "He's in Azkaban! How could he not be?"
"Well, there's this theory…" Luna started, unfazed.
"I'm sorry, I don't want to get off on the wrong foot with you," Estella said snappily. "But I'd really rather not discuss my father and your conspiracy theories."
Luna blinked at her. "Well, alright." She said, pulling out the latest issue of The Quibbler and proceeding to flick through it upside down. "Did you know my father secured an exclusive interview with a Hoobastank in this latest issue? Pity the photos didn't turn out!"
The raven-haired girl was about to criticise Luna by pointing out that Hoobastanks were mythological creatures that never existed – and even if they did they were long extinct – but the carriage door opened to reveal none other than Draco Malfoy.
"Top of the morning to you, Cousin of mine." He said silkily, bowing dramatically in his Slytherin robes. "I finally found you at last. I didn't see you on the platform."
"Good morning, Draco." Estella said bemusedly. "I've been on the train since a little after 10. I suspect you arrived thereafter." Then, as an afterthought she added blandly. "I trust your Summer went well."
Draco took the seat next to Estella without invitation. "Oh, my Summer was just swell." Draco lamented, his voice thick with sarcasm. "Though I daresay it would have been much more to my liking with someone like you in it."
"Still looking for a worthy playmate, Draco?" Estella rolled her eyes. "Getting tired of ordering your minions around? You poor thing. Where are Beavis and Butthead anyway?"
"Who?" Draco said, missing the Muggle reference and thinking she'd merely forgotten their names. "You mean Grabbe and Goyle, right? They're standing sentinel outside this very carriage. Can't have them in here cramping your style."
"Oh Dray, you're too much!" Estella squealed, laying it on thick.
The suave white-haired Slytherin stared at Estella in shock. "Did you just call me 'Dray'?" He asked. Estella nodded. "No one's ever called me that before. I think I like it. Only you can call me that of course."
"Of course." Estella said, rolling her eyes.
"It's a pleasure to see you in good health after your Summer." Draco said congenially. "Mother asked me to watch out for you today seeing how Uncle Severus has to conduct himself as a teacher would during the term now that you're a student."
"I'm touched by the gesture." Estella said, truly touched. "Please be sure to pass on my regards to your mother."
"Certainly." Draco promised, staring at her intently. "Whatever is that on your wrist?"
Estella pulled at the sleeves of her robe in response. "This? Oh, this…" She said, thinking quickly. "Damn Portkey was out by a few metres and the dumb Muggle conductor wouldn't let me pass without wearing one."
Luna looked up from her magazine and gave her a quizzical look, but kept her mouth shut when she saw Estella shake her head ever so slightly.
"Shall I do the honours of removing the hideous thing for you?" Draco said, drawing his wand in a gentlemanly manner.
"Oh, no." Estella said, thankful that the writing on the band had all but disappeared and Draco had no clue on Muggle procedures to doubt her story. "I want my Uncle to see first hand the physical manhandling I was forced to endure thanks to his inaccuracies in targeting a simple port key." She said, cementing the cover story that Estella had ported to the platform from her Uncle's quarters in Hogwarts to experience the journey with the other first years. "I'm still angry with him for not accompanying me to the platform, and this will secure his guilt."
Draco leant back, relaxed in her company. "You'll be an asset to Slytherin." He said coyly.
"What makes you think I will be sorted into Slytherin?" Estella said, just as coyly, her eyebrow raised. "Why, I could have already been sorted…"
"You haven't though, have you?" Draco blurted.
"My, my." Estella said playfully. "Could it be that Draco Malfoy is anxious to see what house little ol' me is sorted into?"
"Of course!" Draco said irritably. "Though I think I can clearly rule out Gryffindor or Hufflepuff. Ravenclaw is a distant possibility, but you're assuredly a Slytherin! Look at your bloodlines! You've been living with our Housemaster your entire life!"
Estella smiled falsely at Draco. She hoped she wasn't in Slytherin. It'd be far too exhaustive to have to play the part of loyal niece-of-death-eater 24/7. Playing buddy-buddy with Draco was hard enough. Not that she loathed the boy, but she knew that the moment he discovered her true ambiguity towards the politics his family held dear, he'd turn like the tide and she'd have to watch her back. Even if blood was thicker than water, her relationship with Draco was hardly close enough to guarantee immunity from the Malfoy wrath. Heck, if Draco had turned around and told his parents he was marrying a Muggle Lucius would probably go so far as to kill his own son rather than bear the shame of it.
Careful. She had to be careful. Thankfully, she had been taught by the best.
End Chapter: Missing Moments, Magical Musings….