Author's note: This is what came up when I was listening to the song 'Alone' (Another ficcie in the rain!). Unfortunately I had to take it off the account because of the warning to do with adding song lyrics is not part of the user's fiction, so I re-edited it and added some snippets of my own poetry. I really hope that this is better than the previous version and I really appreciate if any of you are willing to re-review it. It doesn't have to be much but at least I know that my work is really looked at. Arigatou.
Shelter From The Rain
Goku stealthily walked down the narrow corridor that was lined with four doors leading to four individual rooms of their cabin. Gojyo and Hakkai had stopped at a nearby local bar, leaving Sanzo and him alone to take care of their lodgings. The young heretic felt tense as he neared the last door at the end. It was slightly open, a stream of gentle candlelight coming from the interior.
Goku peeped through and spotted his master. The blond man was sitting near the window, his top robes off, leaving him in his leather vest. His golden bangs covered his eyes as his teeth were grinding on a lit cigarette, his face at a slight angle towards the window with the rain pattering against the pane. The burning ember shone as brightly as the candle that stood proudly on a small wooden table next to the monk that also housed a half-open packet of cigarettes, his lighter and ash-tray.
This was not a good sign. Goku knew that. Sanzo seemed angrier, fiercer and more temperamental than usual when it was raining. He had learned about it the hard way that nearly made him join Homura's side.
'Why does Sanzo hate the rain so much...' Goku's thought passed in his brain, his heart yearning to comfort his sun. Anything to wipe away the seemingly colder look that always made him flinch.
The room was
so quiet that the boy could only hear Sanzo's breathing and heartbeat.
They sounded tense, ready to burst a flame of anger.
Goku couldn't stand the cold silence amongst the whispers. It made him scared.
'No...Sanzo wouldn't tolerate fear in weaklings,' the golden eyed heretic chastised mentally before he moved to open the door slightly more to enter. Stepping inside, he called out to the older man, his young voice was no louder than a whisper yet so clear as crystal, "Sanzo, daijoubu?"
Blind and deaf
To the outside world
We sink in the dark pits
Of our souls
And into darkness
Where light cannot penetrate
But a small voice within
May be a small haven of hope
Sanzo watched as the raindrops pattered softly against the window pane, leaving liquid silver trails in their midst. Smoking didn't make him feel any better unless he would do with a couple more dozen. Drinking beer was out of the question for this kind of weather. The room was dim, matching his inner depression sinking into his mind, giving a painful reminder of his moment of weakness in his childhood. Along with the hidden guilt on the very day he almost lost his most precious person...
'So kill me if I've gone insane...' Sanzo thought with a huff from his cigarette.
He knew that Hakkai and Gojyo weren't in the cabin. That meant he was alone with...
"Sanzo, daijoubu?"
Goku. Inside his mind, he decided that the voice was uncharacteristically the younger's voice. It was too soft.
With
a grunt, the monk angled his head away from the window and found Goku
inside the room with him. A few feet away. His face holding a concerned
expression with large golden eyes filled with child-like innocence and
naivete. Standing awkwardly and nervously.
When Sanzo gave a reply to the young man's question of concern, his voice was cold and without emotions, "What do you want, baka saru?"
The twisted nature
Of the answers we hold
To such menial questions
Of concern
We want not be seen with pity
Yet we want to be hold with warmth
Be torn by two planes of decision
Or cease to exist when faced
With a sad tear
Goku flinched at the cold tone of Sanzo but didn't let his fear show. He had seen this before and he was not going to make the same mistake again. But he couldn't bear to leave his sun. He thought he could hear something else behind the threat. He thought he could hear a plea for help and warmth.
The young man went over and sat on the bed that was against the wall. He could feel his master's hard gaze upon him. The boy stared back at the amethyst gaze with his own golden one.
"I just want to come in, Sanzo," Goku simply stated, his heart hoping that he wouldn't make the same mistake, "You're not well."
He
knew that the comment was blunt but that was the only thing he could
describe his master's lament. Being 'sick' was all he could think up.
He had never seen Sanzo express other emotion except anger and a trace
of...tenderness, but the latter was rare.
Sanzo stubbed the cigarette in the nearby ashtray, no longer interested to smoke.
"How would you know, saru," Sanzo muttered, "You don't know anything."
Goku shook his head with resolute, saying otherwise. He knew this was Sanzo talking and he was walking on dangerous ground. Instead the younger of the two stood up from the bed and neared the golden haired man who flinched at the close distance. Then the golden-eyed heretic did something that made the monk freeze.
Goku knelt beside his master and laid his head on his lap, his tanned strong hand clasping the fingers of Sanzo's pale, leather clad and slightly bigger hand.
The golden eyed young man nuzzled close to his stomach, closing his eyes at the warmth and the feel of smooth leather against his hair. Goku exhaled and he could only wait for his master's reaction; hoping for the better or for the worst.
Warmth is a treasure
That cannot be gained
Through means of wealth
And acquisition
For it is achieved
When you are near
Someone who cares
Sanzo was, in a word...petrified. Not because he was afraid. But because of the strange warm touch suddenly piercing and circulating in the dark depths of his soul. Sanzo thought he saw slight hesitation in the golden orbs of the younger man because of his actions. He thought that at this point, he would slap the boy on the head with the harisen and yell at him to get out. But he couldn't. He didn't have the heart and mood to do it. His charge was naive to such adult dilemmas.
No matter how much he had put up with Goku's everyday whining about food and his stupidity, the man felt compassion for the only one who had managed to worm his way in a small space of his closed heart through his innocence and optimism. He could feel the boy tensing in the silence in amidst the pitter-pattering of the rain. His eyes that were softly closed but clenched tight. Sanzo sighed and shook his head but he placed a hesitant hand on the locks, inwardly marveling at his messy silkiness and the way Goku visibly relaxed at the touch.
"Why?"
Sanzo's question was soft, simple and so uncharacteristically like a child. He looked down at Goku who perked his head up with soft golden eyes, giving a reply to his master's inquiry. His eyes were filled with feelings a child would show to his father or more...Sanzo found it strangely endearing. The young man held his master's hand till he felt it cup his tanned cheek.
"I want to be with you, Sanzo. That's all I ask."
The
answer was also simple yet it was filled with comforting assurance that
the young man would never leave him. The monk's mind was no longer
focused on the rainy weather and his depression. Instead the older man
had pulled the other to sit on his lap and hugged him gently. He was
surprised by his own actions as do Goku but it seemed...appropriate and
it brought an unknown peace to his soul.
By
this time, Sanzo himself would have rambled how a display of affection
such as this could render one to be weak and defenseless. Not to
mention, the hell of Gojyo's mockery and Hakkai's laughing that would
come their way.
But Sanzo didn't care at the moment as he had
someone important to hold on to. He settled to cradle the younger man
in his arms, feeling a small yet significant piece of emotion coming
back in a tiny abode of his being. As it did, his eyes softened and a
small smile fleeted across his icy yet handsome features.
I searched for myself
In places so unreachable
That I would not notice
Not till later
That my other self
Would reside in you
Goku was shocked to the pits of his being at Sanzo's tender actions. But somehow it felt right to be hugged by him...his master...his sun. He returned the gesture by hugging him around the waist and placing his head on the older man's broad shoulder. The young man felt relieved at the most and allowed a smile to appear on his face. Sanzo felt so warm...
"Goku..."
Sanzo was whispering his name but it sounded soothing and the gentle, husky tone meant so much to the young man. Goku tightened his hold and buried his face at the side of the other's neck, feeling Sanzo's long fingers combing his hair and fingering with the golden diadem around his head. The young man's smile grew wider and more beautiful when he realized that Sanzo was not longer wallowing in the rainy weather. That at least for this night, he had really protected his master from the demons of his past. He cuddled closer to the monk, feeling his long sinewy arms tighten across his shoulders.
"Sanzo..."
The two of them
continued to embrace each other and nothing else was said as they
relished each other's warmth. Moments later, they fell asleep together.
Goku was looking much like a baby as his arms were positioned to cuddle
close to the monk's chest. His head was tucked under Sanzo's chin, his
chocolate coloured locks providing a sufficient pillow. Sanzo's golden
locks mingled together with Goku's hair, and his lips were close to the
younger's forehead as if he knew he was kissing his soft skin in his
sleep. The older man's arms were strong and protective in their grasp
as they held the other body close to his heart. Their sleeping faces
exude a rare peace and tranquility that would match the stillness of
forest and the beauty of a dewdrop on a blade of grass. It was truly a
beautiful and heart-warming sight to behold.
Outside, the rain
gradually changed to a light drizzle before the sun pierced its soft
golden rays through the dark clouds to allow a rainbow arch in the grey
sky accompanied by the melodious chirping of sparrows to bring forth a
new day and to rest the demons of tormented souls at bay...
owari
Ahh...fluffiness...it makes your heart tingle, doesn't it? I was inspired to re-edit it while I was listening to the music box version of the song 'Alone'. That's it...for now. Please leave a review?