Disclaimer: Chapter one
Updated: Saturday 9th April 2005
Chapter Sixty: Escape from AzkabanSirius Black stared at the latest edition of The Daily Prophet that he had managed to scrounge off of a visiting Ministry official. Running his hands over the page reverently, the emaciated prisoner savoured the first piece of civilisation he had encountered in what felt like years – he had lost count. Eyes that had not had any meaningful sort of stimulation, lit up as they registered the long-forgotten principles of the written word.
Noting the date – August 11 1993 – Sirius sighed. His little girl would be starting Hogwarts in September. Or maybe she was a second year already, he wasn't quite sure how long after September students could turn 11 and be accepted into Hogwarts when they were still 10. His mind was pretty much mush when it came to such complex matters these days. Twelve years barely grasping hold on your sanity in a place like Azkaban tended to have such a weathering effect on the psyche.
Tearing his mind away from the painful subject of his daughter, Sirius occupied himself by reading the front page feature about a holiday a family of redheads had won to Egypt. Seeing the name 'Weasley' associated with a family of redheads, the wheels began turning in Sirius' mind. An Arthur Weasley was a distant cousin of his and had been a promising new member of the Ministry during the war. From his blotchy memory, Sirius could muster that he'd married a Prewett and had a young family of boys – none of them yet at Hogwarts age - at the last he'd heard.
Studying the photo of the family closely, Sirius was cheered to realise that it was indeed the same Arthur Weasley in the photo and that he and his wife had apparently been very busy.
"Merlin, they've got a whole Quidditch team of boys!" He muttered to himself. Gazing at the family picture longingly, Sirius' mind drifted back to a time where he and his best friend James had aspired to creating whole Quidditch teams of their own with their beloved wives. Frowning at the smiling, waving faces, he shed a bitter tear. The one child he and James had respectively been blessed to bring into the world had to go through their lives alone as orphans.
'Life's never fair.' A voice in his head sounded, remarkably like his own. The dim memory of saying those harsh words to his Brother-in-law as the sullen man sulked about losing his sister to a marriage he didn't approve of came to mind.
About to throw the newspaper aside in sudden disgust – he had, after all, almost caught himself feeling sorry for his snivelling brother-in-law – Sirius stopped in his tracks as something caught his eye.
A rat.
A rat on the youngest boy's shoulder. A rat on the shoulder of a boy who was by his calculations in his Godson's year. A rat that looked resoundingly familiar.
"Pettigrew!" Sirius spat, seeing red – and not just the red on the Weasley's heads. Leaping to his feet, only to wince in pain as his head hit the low ceiling and his joints cracked in protest of the sudden movement.
"He's at Hogwarts! He's at Hogwarts!"
He didn't know how he got past the Dementors, let alone how he had the strength to dog-paddle all the way back to the mainland, but he was finally out. No more self-pitying, self-loathing punishment for convincing James to change secret keepers then being fool enough to leave his family and Harry to go after that rat… this was bigger than any guilt he felt. Estella and Harry were under threat, and he was the only person who knew of the danger.
It was time to set the record straight.
Dawn was breaking over the Thames by the time Sirius made it to London in his animagus form. Instinctively, the first thing he wanted to do go to his house and see if Remus was there. Stationing himself behind a privet hedge that framed the park across the road from his old house, Sirius sat and waited… keeping his scent on the downwind as a precaution.
Shortly after nine, the door to his flat opened. Sirius recognised his sandy-haired friend immediately, but his breath caught when he saw who Remus was with.
Estella.
Whining yearningly, Sirius whimpered sadly as he saw his not-so-baby girl hug Remus goodbye and head off down the road, Remus waving and watching after her until she had rounded the corner. No sooner had Remus returned inside, was Sirius running… running with energy he didn't even realise he had… to pick up his daughter's scent from where he had last seen her round the corner.
Catching up with the child rather quickly, he lingered behind; happy to simply be near her. It was definitely his baby… the child had Selina's delicate bone structure and his hair and eyes; not to mention a comforting blend of both his and Selina's scents. Even if he wasn't in his animagus form, Sirius knew he'd know his own child anywhere.
Suddenly, the said child in front of him started dancing down the street, humming softly. Being in his animagus form, his sensitive ears picked up the sound of music coming from a walkman she had playing in her ear. If a dog could smirk, then Padfoot was smirking.
"…It's alive, afraid, a lie, a sin
It's magic, it's tragic, it's a loss, it's a win
It's dark, it's moist, it's a bitter pain
It's sad it happened and it's a shame
You want it all but you can't have it
It's in your face but you can't grab it…" (1)
Cold shivers ran down Sirius' spine. The words of the song Estella was bopping along to were so reminiscent of what he was feeling at that time. He had never wanted to hold something in his arms so badly than he did at that precise moment. Estella was just how he imagined her, and so much more. He could just tell. So wrapped up in his thoughts was he, that he didn't notice when another song started to play.
"You picked me up when I was down with nothing
Ga-ave me something I can face the world with that
You showed me just enough to fuel my fire
My-y-y-y desire never want to live without it
Both of us need something like we had before
We can't keep at it like this anymore…" (2)
Sirius smiled inwardly. The songs Estella was playing were evidently released since he had been incarcerated, but it was obvious someone had been positively influenced by the music collection he, Selina and Remus had amassed at the house.
Selina.
A wave of grief washed over him like a rush of water, sucking the air out of his lungs. Merlin how he missed her… especially now, watching their daughter and seeing what she had become. Selina should have been there to see this. Sirius should have been there – in his human form.
'Life's never fair' The voice leered at him. Karma could be a real pain the nether-regions.
"Here you go, dog." A child's voice roused him from his thoughts. He almost lost control of his animagus form in shock when he saw Estella leaning down looking at him, her headphones around her neck. They were standing outside a grocery store, his daughter having somehow darted inside and bought him a really long sausage without him realising it; which she was now waving under his nose invitingly.
He was wrong before, now he truly knew what it meant to want to do something you couldn't. It took every ounce of his restraint to hold himself back from transforming back into his human form and never letting her go again.
When did Estella realise he was following her? Taking the sausage hungrily, Sirius licked her hand in appreciation. Estella patted his head playfully, giggling. "If you go around the back, Lou will put out some water and some real food. Though I wouldn't loiter too long, I think he's gonna call the pound."
Sirius looked at his child, amazed at her compassion. Swallowing the last of the sausage – possibly the first bit of protein he had ingested in almost 12 years – and trotted off down the alley towards the back of the store where, sure enough a bowl of clean water and a plate with left over roast beef – complete with vegetables and two-day-old Yorkshire pudding and gravy – awaited him.
After taking a long thirsty drink from the bowl and inhaling the left over Sunday roast, Sirius contentedly padded to a vacant lot across the road from the store to watch Estella from. From his slightly elevated vantage point, he could see his daughter inside the store, wearing an apron as she retrieved stock from the shelves for the elderly and packed their bags. Another girl, around about the same age, worked alongside her. Upon closer inspection, Sirius could have sworn he saw a wand tip sticking out of the back pocket of the older girl's jeans.
'A friend from school maybe?'
The store did not get a lot of business at that time of day, and so the girls were frequently alone on the floor, left to turn up the radio and dance around with their Muggle brooms. Moving back across the street so he could listen through the open doors of the store, Sirius basked in the carefree innocence of the moment.
A wicked guitar lick started playing over the crackly radio. His daughter squealed excitedly and ran to turn up the volume.
"Come on Hermione… just like we did at Reading!"
The other girl, Hermione, winced at the volume and peered at the manager's door anxiously as she leant against her broom. "We're supposed to be working!"
"We can sweep and mosh at the same time!" Estella urged, tugging at Hermione. "Loosen up a little! You had a good time at Reading."
"Reading was a cultural experience." Hermione said primly. "A grocery store is not the time and place…"
She was cut off, however by Estella flipping the broom on its head as though it were a microphone stand and singing into the bristles.
"…You got to breathe and have some fun
Though I'm not paid I play this game
And I won't stop until I'm done
But what I really want to know is
Are you gonna go my way?… (3)
C'mon 'Mione! I'd hate to have to hex you to sing 'Westend Girls' to all the Slytherins on my birthday!"
Incidentally, the next song that came on the radio was 'Westend Girls', by current pop sensation boy-group East 17.
"How do you do that?" Hermione asked, shaking her head in disbelief.
Estella tapped her nose twice. "Elementary my dear Watson." She said, doing a Sherlock Holmes impersonation. "Ugh, don't know how you like this stuff."
"Turn it down, we have a customer." Hermione hissed, unfazed by Estella's enthusiasm.
The rest of the morning passed pretty much the same way for Sirius as he returned to the vacant lot to watch the girls. He made sure to keep his distance this time as he followed the girls leaving work, scavenging for the left over pretzel Estella dropped on the grass 'for the birds' and watching them hungrily as they dug into a mouth watering ice cream. For some reason he was actually surprised to see Severus and Remus apparate into the alley beside the parlour and spirit Estella and her friend away.
News of his escape had broken.
That was why, the next day when Aurors were disguised to take Hermione and Estella's place at their work in a effort to trap Sirius, the intuitive animagus did not take the bait. He couldn't even if he wanted to, for no sooner had Severus disappeared with his daughter was he already on his way to Surrey to check on Harry.
(1) Epic by Faith No More
(2) Lay Down Your Guns by Jimmy Barnes
(3) Are You Gonna Go My Way by Lenny Kravitz
End Chapter: Escape From Azkaban