Chapter Nine

My Immortal

A week or two passed.

Nathan stayed out of my way and Reed and I got closer. Things were far from perfect but at least they were starting to fall into place. Whatever had been tweaking Riley was over because she was back in full on best friend mode and my lack of good judgment in guys had disappeared.

For the time being of course.

I still saw him; since we did share a class together and I had been hanging out at Riley's a bit but he seemed unfazed by my presence and I tried to have the same reaction. He wasn't seductive, he wasn't cold, and he wasn't rude. He was surprisingly normal and it was almost as if we didn't have this inane past that I had been trying to get over. He, evidently, seemed to have gotten over it all.

And that's what I wanted, right?

The worst part was though; I didn't know exactly what it was that had caused this sudden mood swing of his. For all I know, it had nothing to do with Reed. After all, he had upped and left me at my house that night and that could have been the end for us all together.

Regardless of whether or not I gained a boyfriend the morning after.

It was Friday night and clueless Riley decided that it would be a fabulous idea to have Reed over to her house to hang out since her mom was out of town. "You guys can sleep in Mom's room…" she had said "…it'll be perfect." and I knew what she was implying without having to ask. Keep in mind, Riley still thought I was a virgin and she thought that I wanted to lose it to Reed.

She was wrong on both accounts.

It's not like Reed couldn't have slept over at my house. But I had kept telling him that I didn't know when my parents were coming back so I didn't want to take the risk. It was partly true; I didn't know when they were coming back, but I also knew that it wouldn't be any time soon.

I guess you never know with them, though.

I gave Riley the same excuse so she thought that it would be perfect if we did it at her house. I kept on insisting that it would be weird but she kept pushing and pushing and I ultimately had to give in just so she would shut up about it all and I would stop having to lie.

I hated lying to her.

Unfortunately, I knew Nathan was going to be there and that just made things ten times worse. I knew Reed was expecting us to have sex since his face had lit up when Riley told him that we were spending the night at her house and that was enough to make me want to groan. Nathan's presence on this ever so amazing nice was simply icing on the cake.

"I'm excited for tonight," Reed said as we pulled out of my driveway and onto the street. I was so off in my own little world that I didn't even realize what he was saying.

"To hang out with Riley? We see Riley all the time…" I trailed off "…oh."

He smiled sheepishly and looked over to me, putting his leg on my thigh. "I don't want to push you, Haley. If you're not ready…we can wait."

I laughed softly. "Let's just see where the night takes us…"

He smiled and kissed me on the nose when we hit a red light. "For you…I'd wait forever. That is, of course, unless Angelina Jolie comes along…"

I laughed.

Why did he have to be so amazing about it all?

I turned up the radio and let a Keane song fill the car as we drove off. I softly tapped the window as I hummed the tune. It was a couple minutes later that I felt him watching me so I turned to him and smiled. "What?"

"It's just…can I ask you something?"

I frowned. "Of course. What's up?"

He turned his head forward and gripped the steering wheel tighter. "I don't know if this is any of my business but…okay, I know that when we were together you hadn't really…been with anyone and I was wondering…"

Oh god, here it comes.

"…you know, are you still…I mean, have you…been with anyone?"

He was so cutely shy about it that it almost made me want to smile but then I realized that I had to answer it and I immediately wanted to cry. "Reed…" I started but he shook his head and smiled awkwardly.

"No, you're right…it's none of my business. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked that." He closed his eyes for a second before opening them and taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry…" he said again.

Silence.

I studied him for a second and found that I wanted to be honest with him. I was sick of lying to everyone and I felt like it was something that I needed to get off my chest. If I was going to have sex with Reed, I needed him to know that it wasn't my first time because that would have been way too deceiving. "I have," I whispered.

He looked over abruptly. "What?"

"…been with someone. I'm not a virgin anymore." I said and then looked out the window so I wouldn't have to see his face.

"Oh…" he said finally "…oh, okay. I mean, that's fine…I just thought…can I ask with who?"

I shook my head. "I'd rather not say if you don't mind."

We drove the rest of the way in silence.

When we reached Riley's house, I was starting to feel like I had made a terrible mistake. He hadn't talked to me at all and it was freaking me out. Maybe being honest wasn't the best thing to do in this particular situation. He rung the doorbell and we just stood there for a second, waiting, without a word passing between us.

Then I felt his hands grab both my shoulders and spin me to face him. I looked him straight in the eye and he did the same. "I don't care, Haley. I mean, I do care…just because I wanted to be your first but you know what, it doesn't matter anymore. I didn't expect you to wait for me." He smiled reassuringly.

"So you don't hate me?"

He laughed. "How could I hate a pretty girl like you?"

I smiled and shrugged. "I was wondering the very same thing."

Our kiss would have lasted longer if the door hadn't opened and Nathan hadn't been inside the house, grinning like a maniac. "How cute."

"You didn't tell me Nathan was going to be here," Reed growled but more at Nathan than at me.

"I didn't know," I lied.

Reed and Nathan hadn't really seen each other since Reed and I got together. We all did have the same class together but I made sure that I wasn't extra affectionate towards Reed while in that particular class and I tried to get Reed out as soon as the bell rang to avoid confrontation. When I went to Riley's on occasion, I made up an excuse why he couldn't come. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.

Until now.

"Where's Riley?" I asked.

"Oh you know…around," he said and I realized that he wasn't looking at me at all. He and Reed seemed to have some sort of staring contest going on and it was really hard not to fidget nervously at my spot on the doorstep.

"Vague," I answered, pushing past him and pulling Reed by the hand with me. "Riley?" I called up the stairs and seconds later, I heard her footsteps approaching at an alarming speed. I didn't even see her coming until she pounced on me and the two of us fell to the ground. She laughed uncontrollably and I did the same, only nervously. "Everything okay there?"

She smiled. "Of course, I'm just…you know, excited that you're here…with your boyfriend and you know…"

I eyed her suspiciously and she laughed, pulling me into the other room. "How are you not fucking excited about this?" She asked and then lowered her voice to a whisper. "You're going to lose your virginity tonight!"

I raised an eyebrow. "That's what's got you all weirdly happy? That I am going to be losing my virginity?"

She shrugged. "We're like the same person so it's sort of like I'm loosing mine too." The second she said it, a weird expression crossed her face and I furrowed my brow but she covered it up immediately with a laugh. "This is so perfect, Haley. I always knew you'd loose it to Reed."

Hah!

"Yea…" I mumbled and pulled her back into the other room.

When I entered, Reed put his arm around my waist and guided me into the living room. Nathan and Riley followed. "So, what did you guys want to do?" Riley asked, turning on the stereo and blasting The Postal Service.

"I don't know but where is the liquor?" I asked and Nathan scoffed beside me while Reed's grip on my waist tightened. "What?" I asked innocently. "I'm thirsty."

"And you couldn't quench it with lemonade?" Reed asked suspiciously.

I shrugged. "You're no fun."

Riley's mom hid the liquor in the basement. I'm pretty sure that she knew that we knew where it was but she didn't say anything. It was sort of a don't ask don't tell sort of deal with Mrs. Scott. Reed asked to go to the bathroom and I told Riley that I would grab the liquor but Nathan insisted he wanted to go with me.

How Riley was still clueless was beyond me.

"So you two are pretty cozy," Nathan commented as I opened the basement door and flicked on the light. "I thought you didn't want to get into a relationship with him."

I walked ahead of him. "That's not really any of your business, now is it?"

He laughed. "Maybe it is…maybe it's not." He didn't say anything for a moment and all that could be heard was the bottles clinking together. "Why are you with him?"

I rolled my eyes as I grabbed some rum out of the cabinet, followed by a couple bottles of vodka. If I was going to get through tonight and I was going to "lose my virginity" with Nathan in a room nearby I was going to have to have some serious alcohol in my system.

"Can you just stop bothering me?" I said assertively and again, he laughed, grabbing some beer out of the fridge and already chugging one down.

"I don't think you want me to stop bothering you," he told me and I turned around to face him so that we were looking each other dead in the eye.

I shook my head. "I don't get you, Nathan." I said honestly. "Why did you leave me that night? I thought sex was what you wanted."

He looked at me confidently, raising an eyebrow. "It is."

I laughed bitterly. "Just not with me anymore. Got bored, huh?" He didn't say anything. I looked at him one last time before heading back up the stairs and calling behind me, "guess I made the right decision then."

Riley wouldn't let me drink that much.

When I tried to grab the bottle out of her hand she pulled it out of my reach and then widened her eyes at me. "You don't want to be drunk tonight…" Riley told me "…believe me." The outside pressure for me to have sex with Reed was becoming unbearable. I didn't want to do it, but I knew that I had to if I wanted to get Riley off my back.

As well as Nathan.

"So Reed…" Nathan started, grabbing his cup of rum and coke "…you and Haley used to date a while ago, right? I mean…how come you guys broke up?" His lips curled into a smirk as he looked over at me and I glared in response, moving closer to Reed and planting a long kiss on his lips.

"That doesn't matter…all that matters is that we are back together now. Isn't that right, baby?" I smiled, batting my eyelashes.

Reed winked. "That's right."

Nathan growled from his spot against the doorway and moved in to sit on the chair across from us, next to Riley. He took another sip of his drink and gave me a nasty look.

I win.

"No, I'm just curious…" Nathan said again, obviously not letting this one go "…it must not have been anything serious if you guys are back together now. You didn't cheat on her, did you?"

Reed narrowed his eyes. "Not exactly…"

"I believe it is a yes or no question, Reed," Nathan said triumphantly.

"No." He said firmly. "I didn't. Can we not talk about this?"

I exhaled deeply. "Really. Hey Riley, can you please pass me that vodka over there?" Riley shook her head in response and then shot me a glance to which I chose to ignore. Things were just starting to get complicated and I was sure that was the last thing I needed at that point in time.

Nathan tried to tear apart Reed the entire night and I could tell that Reed was starting to get nervous but I tried to intervene as much as possible. I had to go to the bathroom extremely badly but I sat there the entire time, refusing to leave the two alone together.

That would have been my worst nightmare.

Riley was more excited about me "losing my virginity" that night than I was and it seemed to be all she was thinking about. It was starting to weird me out, to be honest and I would have called her on it but I didn't want to do it in front of Nathan and Reed and well, like I said, I wasn't about to leave them alone.

Eleven thirty rolled around and Reed announced that he was pretty tired, shooting me a wink that would have been really cute if I hadn't been dreading this all night. Riley seemed to agree and Nathan keep sending me suspicious glances, telling everyone that he wasn't tired at all. But Reed and Riley were, so I followed them upstairs and told Reed I would meet him in our room in a couple of minutes.

Riley, of course, wanted to talk to me.

"You're going to tell me all about it?" She asked and I reassured her with a nod. "You've been waiting for this like your whole life, Haley. Why do I get the feeling that I'm more excited about this than you are?"

Because it's true.

"I am…Riley. I just don't want to jinx it," I assured her and she smiled.

"You're nervous, aren't you?" She said, grabbing my shoulders and pulling me so that we were facing each other directly. "Don't be nervous, Haley. It'll be fine. You and Reed, you're perfect."

"Thanks," I said and then gave her a hug. "Goodnight, Ry."

"Night babe."

I took a deep breath before entering the room. Reed was lying on the bed with his hands behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling, completely motionless. "Hey," I whispered softly and he looked up, smiling sweetly.

"Hey," he beamed and I watched him for a moment before making my way over to the bed and plopping down next to him. We were both on our sides, facing each other. He leaned in and gave me a soft kiss before leaning back to study my eyes. "Are you ready?"

I nodded reluctantly and he leaned in again, this time kissing me with much more passion. His hands were all over me and I felt myself trying to let go of all my thoughts, trying to simply focus on Reed and the moment. This is right, I convinced myself.

He pulled off my shirt and I did the same for him before beginning to unbuckle his jeans. "Did you bring protection?" I breathed into his ear.

He nodded and pulled away from me, reaching into his back pocket to find what I assumed to be his wallet. He suddenly frowned and patted his front pockets. "Shit. I don't know where my wallet is…" he said, breathing heavily. He turned to look at me and smiled sadly. "I must have left it at home."

"That's okay…" I said, trying not to sound so relieved "…maybe another night."

He shook his head. "No, I'm really sorry. Look, how about I just run out to the store really quickly and pick some up. It'll take like five minutes."

I sat up on the bed and put my shirt back on. "It's late, Reed. Don't worry about it."

He looked around the room. "Do you think Riley has some?"

I laughed. "I highly doubt it."

He nodded. "Okay…um…her mom?"

I closed my eyes tightly. "Ew…image…image…" I whined.

He laughed but then suddenly stopped. "Nathan probably has some. I'll just go ask him."

My eyes widened unexpectedly. "No," I said…a little too fast and a little too loud. "I mean, no…come on, you hate that guy. Why would you want to go and ask him?"

"There are more important things, Haley…" he laughed "…I can put my feelings aside for a couple minutes if it means being with you."

"I just…I just don't think that's such a good idea." I stuttered, my heart suddenly racing. Reed going to ask Nathan for condoms? And I thought them talking was my worst nightmare.

"Don't be stupid," he laughed. "I'll be right back."

I jumped out of the bed to prevent him from walking out the door. "No…" I said sharply "…I'll go. I mean, it'll just be easier, you know? He doesn't exactly like you and…I'll just, be right back."

Reed frowned. "Are you sure?"

"Positive," I squeaked, a fake smile plastered on my face. When he backed down, I sighed in relief and opened the door to enter the hallway where I tiptoed past Riley's room and stopped at Nathan's bedroom door.

The light was still on and there was a faint sound of music so I knew that he was still awake. I considered going back to Reed and telling him that Nathan was asleep but I knew that Reed would insist on waking him up. Reed wanted to have sex, and I knew that nothing was going to stop him at this point.

I knocked.

When the door opened, Nathan looked surprised to see me, just as I thought he would. "Can I help you?" He smirked.

I pushed past him and walked into his room, spotting the guitar on his bed. "Were you writing a song?" I asked.

He walked up behind me and then grabbed the guitar to put it up against the wall. "Yea…nothing special," he said, flopping down on the bed and motioning for me to do the same. "Just a few chords. I'm not much of a singer." I saw him watching me out of the corner of my eye but I didn't look up. I was still trying to work up the courage to ask him for a condom.

"It sounded good," I said.

"But you didn't come in here to tell me that." He laughed softly. "Did you?"

I sighed and looked up at him briefly before averting my eyes. "Reed and I…well, we are…you know, taking our relationship to the…" I cleared my throat "…next level…"

"Sex?" He asked abruptly and I looked up.

"Yea…and we don't have…" Why weren't the words coming out? God, I sounded like a fool.

"Condoms?" He laughed.

I gulped and started to play with my hands in my lap. "Yea. Condoms."

He didn't move for a second; didn't speak but then he got up and moved to his dresser where he opened a drawer and pulled out a couple. He tossed them on the bed and then retook his seat next to me.

I didn't reach for them.

"He wasn't prepared?" He asked.

I shook my head. "He lost his wallet."

"And you wanted him so badly that you were willing to come and ask me, your previous sex partner, if I had any condoms to spare?" He asked.

I shrugged. "I figured it was better than him coming."

He laughed. "Didn't want me to reveal anything from your past?"

I figured it for a rhetorical question.

I knew that I should probably get up but I didn't, I just sat there in silence with him for a moment or two until he finally spoke. "You like him," he said.

There was a long pause before I said, "He loves me." And I took the condoms from off the bed and made my way to the door.

His voice stopped me. "Haley…" he said and I heard his footsteps behind me. I turned around just in time for his lips to meet mine in a long and passionate kiss. He pulled away first and stared back at me.

"I'm still with him," I whispered, our lips only inches apart.

He nodded. "I know," he said before turning around and moving over to the bed where he picked up his guitar and played a few chords. I only watched him for a moment before turning back around and heading out the door, condoms in hand.

Before I reached Reed, I stuck them in my back pocket.

"Did he have any?" Reed asked when I entered the room and fell onto the bed beside him.

"He was all out," I replied before closing my eyes and blocking out everything.

"That's okay," Reed said and I smiled in spite of myself.