Disclaimer: See Chapter One

Updated: Friday 15th April 2005

Chapter Sixty Six: Recovery

Remus, having finally torn Severus from the bed, throwing him in a heap on the floor where he crumpled, unconscious, looked up to follow Madame Pomfrey's shocked eyes. There, left on the bed, was Estella, convulsing uncontrollably, eyes rolling in the back of her head.

"Don't just stand there, help me roll her on her side!" Madame Pomfrey snapped into action.

The lithe werewolf, however, didn't have to be told twice. Hauling himself onto his Goddaughter's cot, he sat against the bed head, pulling Estella onto his lap in an effort to wrap his arms around her and hold her in place.

"Turn her head to the side and have her bite down on this." Madame Pomfrey ordered as she conjured a bite plate, handing it to the shaken man. "She'll choke on her tongue or bite it off otherwise."

"Should… should I hold her still?" Remus asked, his voice cracking. "I don't want to hurt her. What did he do? What's wrong with her?"

"Just keep her from harming herself. Don't try to stop her movement completely with a bruising grip." Madame Pomfrey instructed as she summoned potions from her stores. "Her shock is worsening. It appears her Uncle tried to make her relive whatever sent her into shock by forcing himself into her mind."

The two adults glanced down at the rumpled heap that lay unconscious on the stone floor.

"Are you going to help him?" Remus asked bitterly as the potions in Estella's body finally began to show their calming effects.

"Leave him there to sleep it off." Madame Pomfrey said coolly. She was a compassionate nurse at heart but she had no time for people who caused a child suffering. "I warned him last time that he could do more harm than good; but he just had to keep pushing. The poor child. Like she hasn't been through enough."

"Will she be alright?" Remus asked softly, brushing sweaty strands of hair from the child's face as she lay against his chest, lulled into a peaceful rest by his heartbeat. "What could have caused…"

"Only time will tell." Madame Pomfrey said gravely. "As for what happened, it's likely her mind will try and suppress the memory. She might never remember what happened last night."

"Good." Remus said, shivering at the possibilities as he could detect a familiar scent on the slumbering child. "It'd be for the best."

"My sentiments exactly," Madame Pomfrey nodded towards Severus. "I just wish someone would tell him that."

The man on the floor stirred. Getting up on his own accord, the dishevelled man pulled himself together and stood, straightening his robes briskly, trying to maintain his dignity.

"What's wrong with her now?" Severus said gruffly, taking in the unconscious form of his niece entombed in Remus' arms on the bed. A yearning deep in his heart threatened to break through the walls he had so carefully constructed as he caught himself wishing it was him with his niece in his arms like that.

"And what are you doing, Lupin? You're making her weak, coddling her like that. She's not an infant." He snapped, the cool efficiency of indifference washing over his heart, suppressing his vulnerable… weaker… instincts.

Before Remus could get a chance to rebuke the slightly crazed man's words, Madame Pomfrey had positioned herself in front of the potions master and was poking him in the chest.

"You. Out of my infirmary. Now." She said seethingly.

"I will not have you…" Severus snapped back arrogantly. His heart was keening again, reluctant to leave its very reason for beating.

"You did this to her." Pomfrey continued. "I warned you Severus Snape. Now leave before I have you escorted out."

"I will not leave my niece!" He cried out, alarmed. 'What have I done?' He thought to himself, his stomach churning uncomfortably.

"I will have you arrested for child endangerment if you don't leave my ward this instant!"

"That's preposterous!" Severus spluttered. 'I would die for her!' His heart bleated silently.

"You interfered with the recovery of one of my patients, Severus." Madame Pomfrey. "You pushed her over the edge."

Severus was ashen. "She'll recover?" He said regretfully. 'I will never forgive myself if she doesn't…'

"I hope for your sake she does, Professor." Madame Pomfrey said quietly, somewhat sympathetic for the man – after all he had not left his niece's side while she was petrified the year previously. "But I am afraid I will still be needing to ask you to leave."

"When can I come back?" Severus asked, seeing that the stubborn nurse was not about to back down any time soon. 'I hope she forgives me…'

"I will alert you when the child awakens." Madame Pomfrey assured him. "After that it will depend on if she wants to see you."

Casting Lupin and the nurse a look in parting, Severus nodded shortly and swept out of the infirmary, his robes billowing behind him.

Three days had passed by with little change. Late on the third evening since Estella was found, she finally began to stir for the second time.

"Estella…" Remus' voice rumbled deep in his chest as the child's dead weight lay nestled against him. He'd not been content to merely sit at her side, the alpha wolf in him rising to the surface and seeking to smother Sirius' scent with his own.

The child stirred against him. "Mmmoony?" Her voice murmured, dry and raspy from days of not being used.

"Welcome back." Remus said relieved, squeezing his arms around the stretching form of his Goddaughter. Bringing his hand up to brush a hair from her face, Remus was dismayed, however, to feel her tense and shy away. "Shhh… what's the matter, cub?"

The slightest of sighs muffled into his chest as the body in his arms began to relax. "N-nothing." She said quietly. "Where's my Uncle?"

"Madame Pomfrey sent him away." Remus explained. "Are you sure you're alright? You're acting strangely. Do you want me to call the nurse?"

Estella hauled herself up into a sitting position and rested her head on her Godfather's shoulder.

"How much class have I missed?"

He couldn't help himself. He laughed. Almost a week of nervous tension slowly easing itself from his body. "The matter of your education is inconsequential. What matters is that you're alright." He said, mumbling the words into the side of her head as he leaned down to kiss her hair. "No one will try and make you talk about what happened anymore."

Pulling away, Estella tilted her head and narrowed her eyes at her godfather. "You don't want to know what happened?"

"Of course I want to know." Remus said. "But I don't need you to tell me what happened for me to know what occurred."

A small gasp took the breath from Estella's lungs.

"I could smell him on you." Remus explained. "No one else knows."

"Uncle Sev…"

"Your Uncle was just concerned for your welfare. He doesn't take well to being kept in the dark." Remus said, his lips twitching slightly. "Though by the looks of it he will have to get used to it."

"Well I don't want to talk about it." Estella said softly. "It won't change things."

"I wish you would talk to someone though." Remus said, concern furrowing his brow. "I hate seeing you upset like this."

Estella looked away. "I couldn't do it." She said softly.

It took the strength of his werewolf senses to hear what she had said. "Do what, love?"

"Stun him." She said, her breath coming out in a shaky sob. "I could have done it you know."

"Don't blame yourself Estella." Remus cooed in soothing tones. "You may have had your wand, but he had a knife and physicality over you."

"But he put the knife away!" Estella cried out exasperatedly. "I still couldn't do it."

Remus didn't know how to take this latest development. "He didn't try and hurt you?" He asked relieved.

"Of course not." Estella responded, a little too quickly. Her face reddened. "I mean, it all happened so fast! And… and… and… he wasn't like I thought."

"It's alright to be confused, sweetheart." Remus said hesitantly.

"But I let him get away!" Estella cursed herself. "Why did I do that? What if people find out? I will be in trouble."

The older wizard sighed. "Estella, it is perfectly understandable." He said levelly. "No one who has a heart like yours would want to see harm come to a family member."

"But he is bad!" Estella cut in.

"It doesn't matter." Remus said softly. "It's not a good thing that Sirius is still out there, of course, but no one will see reason to hold you accountable for that. No one would expect a mere child to bring him down. He's an extremely powerful wizard who is dangerous and capable of great things. You may have felt you had opportunity but any good Auror would tell you it doesn't pay to provoke such a man without adequate back up. For all you know he may have had a stolen wand hidden in his clothes. Did I ever tell you he was an Auror himself? He is highly trained in evading attack and capture, you were extremely wise not to mess with him."

Mulling it all over in her mind, Estella decided that she suddenly felt a lot better about things. "Thanks Uncle Remus, for knowing what to say."

"I only speak the truth, child." He said warmly as he shifted himself off the bed to stand. "How about some food, mmm? I think I have some chocolate right here…" With that, he wrapped his hand behind Estella's ear to produce a piece of chocolate.

"You know, Moony." Estella said between mouthfuls of the rich creamy substance Remus had popped in her mouth. "It's really getting old, that. I've known for at least the past five years that you pull it out of your sleeve!"

His game foiled, Remus pouted. "Alright, you caught me." He said playfully. "How about I have the nurse fetch us some real food?"

"No need." A drawling voice interjected as Draco Malfoy approached them hovering a tray. "I was coming by to get a daily progress report and was asked to bring the professor his meal. There's more than enough for two."

"Why thankyou Mr Malfoy. Five points to Slytherin for your troubles." Remus said, accepting the tray from the blonde boy.

"You're welcome, Sir." Draco replied smoothly, a creepy smile on his features. "Perhaps, Sir, you would care to take some leave from Miss Black now that she has awaken. Take some time to freshen up? I wouldn't mind staying with the lady so she is not alone."

Remus looked at Estella hesitantly. "Go. I'll be fine." She reassured him. "Besides, you really need a shower."

"Brat." Remus snorted as he left the room, nodding to each of them as a parting gesture.

"So… it's true then." Draco smirked, transfiguring a table and some extra plates and cutlery. "He's your Godfather."

"It was never any secret, Dray." Estella said flippantly as she piled a serving of steaming roast lamb onto her plate. "You just never asked."

"You never saw fit to tell me you Godfather was a halfbreed?" Draco scorned.

"He's not anything of the sort." Estella said defensively, careful not to slip up and reveal her Godfather's secret under the ploy that Draco already knew. "Is there a problem?"

"I just think it's worth noting that my father wasn't aware of Lupin's status." Draco said conversationally, biting into his Yorkshire pudding.

"No offence, but I hardly see how it's any of your father's business." Estella narrowed her eyes. "It's not like my Uncle chose Professor Lupin over him. Lucius was never in the running for the job."

"Of course, I forget that your Uncle only has custodial guardianship over you." Draco said haughtily. "Though why he would consent to you consorting with someone your father associated with…"

"Perhaps it is because he was respecting my mother's wishes!" Estella snapped. "I don't know Draco. It's really a moot point. Maybe my Uncle knew he needed help and went to Remus because asking him for help would be like doing him a favour, rather than my uncle feeling like he owed someone something."

Draco nodded. "No need to get defensive, 'Stell. I just find it peculiar." He said as he served himself another helping of roasted butternut, steeling himself for a confession. "It's not like I am in a position to question someone's status. Not with a bastard for a mother."

"Draco! You shouldn't talk of your mother that way! She's your mother!" Estella chastised him thoroughly. "I don't know what she did to cause your contempt but at least you have a mother."

Sobering slightly. "My Grandmother whored herself out to some stranger and spawned my mother out of wedlock! I try not to take it out on Mother, but do you have any idea what it means for me?" Draco hissed, but altogether looking like a weight had been lifted - the unfortunately proud child having been burdened with a secret for so long. "The blood running through my veins may not be pure!"

"Well you look OK to me." Estella said nonchalantly. "And I dare say your father would not have married your mother without knowing the facts first."

"How long have you known?" Draco said suddenly, his voice cold. "The inference that we're not related by blood doesn't appear to have surprised you."

"I found out a little after you did." Estella admitted calmly. "I know very well it was why you didn't join us that year for Christmas."

"How did you find out? How?" Draco asked, panicking. "Did you overhear my parents? What?"

"I saw a memory in my Uncle's mind." Estella said carefully. "When I fell ill."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Draco said quietly. "Why didn't you tell me you knew?"

"Well Draco if you care to remember I wasn't exactly able to talk much for the rest of the school year!" Estella said, referring to her petrification.

"Yes I know that, but we've been back at school for nearly half a year!" Draco implored.

"I suppose I haven't said anything for the same reason you're only telling me now." Estella said. "I for one have been slightly distracted by current issues being as they are."

"But that's different. I came to tell you only because I didn't want to deceive you into continuing to believe we were related… especially now with him out there. Now I find out your Uncle knows… do you know what that means?"

"That your father would like to see me as your future wife?" Estella said sarcastically.

Draco ran a hand over his face. "I had my suspicions. It would after all make sense." He said. "Why do you know and I don't? I would think I had a right..,"

"Firstly, I found out by accident." Estella said, pausing to take a sip of her Pumpkin Juice. "Secondly, even if my Uncle was in the position to give his consent, he hasn't."

"Is it true then? That your father attacked you in the school?" Draco asked suddenly, changing the subject.

"I don't remember what happened…" Estella lied smoothly. "Or how I ended up in the Gryffindor rooms of all places. Last thing I remember was leaving dinner early so I could finish some work in the library before curfew."

Draco let the matter drop. "Well by any means, it will be hard for us to be bonded with your father loose. Convict or no it's his decision."

"Hardly." Estella growled. "No one makes me do something I don't want to do."

"You wouldn't want to marry me?" Draco asked, hurt. "It's my blood, isn't it? My illegitimate mother's blood! I thought you of all people would understand what it was like to be different! Thanks a lot."

"Whoa! Don't go flying off the broomstick there!" Estella raised her hands in defeat. "I didn't say that! I just have a thing against arranged marriages. I'd prefer to go out and see the world and let fate guide me. It wasn't a personal attack!"

"But can't you see how powerful we could be together?" Draco asked, incredulously. "With our families combined we would have it all! Nothing would be out of our reach!"

"That would be no fun… we would have nothing to work for, no challenge!" Estella yawned, shrugging. "No offence, but 'power' is not really a deciding factor for me."

Draco looked flabbergasted. "Don't tell me you entertain the grand notion of romance?" He gawked. "Do you not care at all for the centuries of purity your forefathers endeavoured to perfect?"

Estella shrugged. "It's not like I'm going to set out to marry a Muggle or anything! Give me some credit!" She snapped, cringing inwardly. "But personally, I can't see myself with someone who throws temper tantrums every time I don't agree with them."

"Fine!" Draco sulked. "You'll change your mind when you're older and see what kind of world we live in, you'll see."

"Don't hold your breath Dray." Estella replied flippantly.

"Why call me that when you don't have any feelings for me?" Draco said.

"I thought feelings were irrelevant, Dray-co!" Estella smirked. "And power was more important." Seeing the blonde Slytherin's icy glare she shook her head. "You have got to lighten up! I'm only 12 for Merlin's sake! There are slightly bigger issues at the moment!"

With an impeccable sense of timing, none other than Harry Potter decided to turn up.

"Hey Estella. Professor Lupin told me at dinner that you'd woken up, I thought I'd come say hi…" Harry said before changing his tone dramatically when he saw Draco. "Malfoy?"

"Potter." Draco spat, standing to face the other boy.

Harry looked uncomfortably between Estella and Draco, taking in their empty dinner dishes. "I, er, see you have company." He said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'll come by later then."

"No don't!" Estella called out as Harry started to turn. "Draco was just leaving, weren't you, Draco?"

Draco narrowed his eyes at Estella and glared openly. "Oh so now you prefer his company over mine!" He whined.

"At the moment anything will be an improvement from your attitude!" Estella said wearily. "I'm tired and a little on edge, all right? I need company that… isn't as taxing on my mind." She gave Harry a relax-I'm-just-letting-him-down-gently look before continuing. "I'd really appreciate it if you could let my Uncle know I'd like to see him before lights out. Could you do that for me, please?"

"Very well." Draco said, being sickeningly polite in the face of his nemesis. "Good night then."

"Bye Draco." Estella said exasperatedly, eager to see the back of him as he left the infirmary without a word to Harry.

"Thank God!" She added as soon as Draco had left the room. "Normally I can put up with his mightier-than-thou attitude but, well, it's been a rough couple of days!"

"I'll say." Harry agreed, sitting down in the chair Draco had vacated.

"Why are you here?" Estella asked, curious.

"I, er, wanted to see how you were." Harry said, his eyes downcast. "I got worried when you didn't wake up after a day."

Estella looked at him with a far away look in her eye. "But I did wake up." She said softly. "Something else happened."

"What?" Harry asked.

Estella proceeded to tell Harry exactly what had happened over the past couple of days. She didn't know why, but she always felt as though she could tell the boy-who-lived anything and he would just understand. Maybe it was because he was raised by Muggles and didn't hold the same prejudices as most of the other people she knew; she wasn't sure.

"…so, what was it like?" Harry asked, interested. "Meeting him for the first time?"

"Hardly a scene from a corny telemovie, Harry." Estella said sadly. "He looked absolutely terrible… he smelled really bad, and he had things growing in his hair, I'm sure of it."

"Ugh." Harry said, screwing his face up. "The prison system here seems a lot harsher than in the Muggle world."

"Worse." She looked away, her mind someplace else.

"D'you think maybe he'd want to see you again?" Harry asked, breaking the silence. "I mean, he's your father."

"He's a convicted criminal Harry." Estella said. "He may as well be dead to me."

"How can you say that?" Harry snapped. "You have a parent who is alive! How could you waste…"

Estella sighed. "You don't know what he did, Harry!" She cried, unshed tears blurring her vision. "It's all so confusing. I thought he wouldn't care."

"What, about you?"

"He let his allegiances take him away from his family, Harry. He chose to be a criminal over being a parent." Estella said. "But… but… but…"

"Maybe he's having regrets?" Harry finished for her. Estella nodded mutely, the lump in her throat preventing words from coming out.

"He was crying, Harry." She whispered hoarsely, a lone tear cascading down her cheek. "I…I…I… don't know, I felt something. But it's wrong. He… he… it's a life sentence, Harry. There is no forgive and forget."

"Will you tell your Uncle?" Harry asked finally, changing the subject. "It was bloody low what he tried to do… but he obviously really wants to know."

"That's why he will never know, Harry." Estella said defiantly. "He has always hated my father, he will never understand why I can't."

"What, hate him?" Harry elaborated. Estella nodded.

"I could have stopped him. He put away his knife! I could have stunned him and they could have caught him and he would have gotten the Dementor's Kiss and the manhunt would have been over. That's what my uncle would have wanted me to do, and I couldn't do it." Estella confessed. "It's the Dementor's Kiss, Harry! He… he… may have done terrible things; but I couldn't be the one to condemn him to that. He gave me life – to have been responsible for his capture would be like, I don't know, betraying that somehow."

"I think I understand," Harry empathised. "No matter what our parents do, there's always a connection there. Before I came to Hogwarts I didn't even know my parent's names. All my Aunt and Uncle would say was that they were layabouts and no-hopers. I didn't know if they cared for me or wanted me or loved me… but I couldn't help but love them anyway. They were my parents."

Estella let out a shaky breath, pushing back the vile feeling of guilt that stabbed at her heart at the idea of Harry growing up not knowing his parents. "I knew you'd get it."

Harry nodded. "Besides, Estella, it would have been too risky for you to take on your father by yourself." He said sternly. "He could have had a wand on him somewhere, or he could have over-powered you physically."

"That's what Remus said." Estella pouted. "But I'm not weak, I could have taken him!"

"I have no doubt you are strong, Estella." Harry said. "But it would be foolish to take on an opponent you do not know how strong they are."

Estella laughed.

"Well that was truly profound, coming from you of all people!" Estella smirked.

Harry blushed, before laughing along with her. Estella relaxed back into her pillows relieved.

Things were going to be alright.

End Chapter: Recovery