A/n: I'm back with nostalgia, still trying to figure out my other stories, and a new story idea just popped out. (inspired by a music video.)
From here until the last couple chapters, it will be in Yamato's POV. Originally, I wasn't going to have the first chapter, but I thought it would be better to see the struggling Yamato and Sora now that they're divorced.
And for this chapter, I did some homework. Learning about amnesia. It's good to learn. Like I say: "You learn something knew everyday." And if you didn't know that, then you just learned about it! Just trying to make it sound more realistic, and less like some soap opera.
Also, if you get confused, Yoshiko has two nicknames.
So if you see Yoshi or Shiko, then it's still Yoshiko.
And Naos is Naouske.
Sweet-Sorato: thanks for the review, and i did get your review. haha, glad you like her. she'll be in there more, but so soon.
crazyamzy: i do try to take my time with updating, i like to make it good for you reviewers. But i feel bad for not updating quickly, because i could leave you with a cliffie and then you'd have to wait months for it. I get so many ideas too, but i try to balance them out. Now i have about 4 stories to update, and another one i'm thinking of starting. I have to try to update faster, if i want to do this though. keep updating with stories, and thanks for reviewing.
OnlySecret: sorry for making you wait. I don't update quickly, but i'm trying to. as i said to crazyamzy, i try to make good to read even means a cliffie. and i feel bad for having to make you wait. thanks for reviewing.
theladyknight: glad i can make this story a bit shocking at the begining. i already had this story planned a couple days after i saw The Notebook. i can't wait until next week when it comes out! glad you like it, and keep on with your stories. thanks for the review.
The scent of the hospital became more clear to me as we rushed down the corridors. That smell... the smell of sick people and medicine combined. I always hated that smell. An ominous feeling rushed over me, for the third time. As we came closer to her room, I bared myself for the worst.
"Daddy?" I heard a small sweet voice call. Turning my direction downward, I saw the same blue eyes as mine staring back at me. Yoshiko...
"Yes." I said, stopping.
"Why are we running? Where's Mommy?" Her eyes full of emotion. This must have been frightening for her and her bother. I couldn't even bare to answer her question. Maybe because, I didn't want to know why either. As they say, ignorance is bliss.
As I racked my brain for the answer, I felt something tugging at my shirt. I turned to my shoulder, only to see Naosuke's eyes just as emotional as his sister's. All of this worrying has made me forget that I was even carrying him, that I was holding onto Shiko's tiny hand, and running down these damn smelly corridors.
Hearing the news has made me become oblivious. I'm surprised I didn't forget the kids. Although they are very important to me, right now she's the one I need to put my concern into.
+Flashback+
"Daddy! Do you think we could go to the park?" I heard Shiko's innocent voice ask.
"Hmm, I don't know. It looks like it might start to rain. If not that, then at least a drizzle. I don't want to get you two sick, and have your mother blaming me." I answered with a joke. If anything happened to either one of them, I knew Sora would have my head. Whether it was a scab on the knee, or coming here to a crying child.
Just thinking about all those times she had yelled at me for not "properly" taking care of our kids, made me smile. However, they were the only fond moments I have of Sora yelling. I wish I could just forget all of those fights...
No regrets though. What's done is done, and I can't change it. No matter how much I want to.
"Yeah! Pwease Da-Da! I miss Yoshiko!" he said, with his adorable toddler voice and bottom lip quivering like a lost little puppy. How could I say no? Now I wanted to go to park.
Glancing towards the window, I noticed the clouds darkening and a breeze. For some reason, a chill went up my spine. A feeling of something bad coming, came over me.
"Sorry kids, but I'm pretty sure it's going to rain. Tell you what, next time we will. And we'll even go to the movies and fill up on popcorn. As long as we don't tell your mother."
Their eyes dimmed at the bad news, but smiles came to their faces at the new plan.
"Maybe...Mommy can come?"
I wasn't sure what to say. The four of us haven't been out together since almost a year. Maybe we could, I wouldn't mind. But...it's all up to her.
"I don't know. You'll have to ask your mother on that one," Again their eyes dimmed. I hated being the one that caused my children such disappointment, "Shiko, would you like me to play the guitar?"
Her eyes lit up again.
"Yes! Then, can you teach me some more?"
"Of course." As much as that guitar would bring back long missed memories, I'd play just to make them happy.
"Naos, Daddy's gonna play a song for his. And sing too!" she said excited.
He looked up at me, his toothy grin worn on his face. The crimson eyes he and his mother shared haunting me.
"Can I pick out the song Da-Da?" he asked, and I couldn't refuse. He reminded too much of his mother.
"Of course. Then you can choose Shiko. I'll be right bak, just let me get the guitar. Shiko watch your brother, okay?" I asked, getting out of my seat on the sofa.
"Okay." she replied. Just as I was about to leave the living room, the phone rang. Deciding it was best to answer, I took another glance outside. The sky grew darker, and that same bad feeling came back.
I walked into the kitchen where the phone was, and picked up on the third ring.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Yes, hello. Is this Yamato Ishida?" I heard the husky voice on the other line ask.
"Yes, who might this be?"
"Hello Mr. Ishida, this is Dr. Amori."
"Hello Doctor." Something's wrong, and I can feel it.
"I regret to inform you that one Sora Takenouchi, is being held in the Tokyo hospital."
My eyes widen, and by breath caught in my throat. Sora...
"S-Sora. What happened to her?" I didn't want to know, but I had to.
"She got into a car crash, and was taken to this hospital. She's fine don't worry."
Worry? How can't I. She was in a car crash and in the hospital.
"Is she there, I mean... can I speak to her."
"I'm sorry, but she's currently unconscious. She's been here for almost three hours now. I called to tell you that she should be fine. It's nothing but a few bruises, a fractured wrist and stitches to the head. However, we're still waiting for her to wake up. When she does, we just need to check that she'll be alright. Hopefully it's not a case of a comma. By the looks of it, it shouldn't be. You can come and visit her now, if you'd like."
...should be fine.
"I...thank you. I'll be right over there. Goodbye."
"Goodbye." I hung up the phone, hearing the dial tone on the other line.
I felt my heart beat faster. She was fine, but still. Too many feelings washed over me. I was scared, worried, angry, and sad all at the same time. What if I really had lost her, and the children what would they think? How could I have let this happen? I should have told her not to go to work today. I don't know what I'd do if I had lost her.
Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
I just needed to breath for second. I walked into the living solemnly, only to see Shiko and Naos staring at me. They had no idea, and I didn't even know how I was going to explain this to them.
"Kids, go grab your coats."
"Are we going to the park?" Shiko asked eagerly. I didn't want to see her face when I told her where we were going and why.
"No. We're going to the hospital. Mommy's there."
+End Flashback+
"Mommy's hurt. That's why she's here."
I could see the worry in her eyes now, and turning towards Naos I saw the same thing.
"Will Mama be otay?" I heard his soft voice ask.
"Yes, she'll be fine. We're just going to check up on her."
Doing as I had started, I grabbed Shiko's hand and made my way towards her room.
A minute or two later, we stood in front of her room. Taking in a deep breath, that smell came back to me. We walked into her room, as I readied myself for what I would see.
The sound of her steady breathing was the only thing I could hear. The fluorescent lights lit up the white room, making it seem even more bleak. She was laying on the bed, engulfed in an ocean of white. Her silky auburn hair sprawled over her pillow. A white bandage wrapped around her head. She looked as peaceful as she always had when she slept. She was dressed in one of those hospital gowns, and a cast was wrapped around her left wrist. Seeing her so still... scared me. If not for the fact that she was breathing, I would have thought she was...dead.
I can't lose her.
"Mommy...?"I heard the soft voice of Shiko call. She let go of my hand and ran towards her mother's side. Then I felt Naosuke squirming in my arms, he wanted to follow his sister's actions. Putting him down, I carefully watched him totter next to Shiko.
At least she'll be fine...
"Mr. Ishida, I presume." A familiar voice said from behind me. I turned towards the direction of the voice, and saw a man in white staring back at me.
He had gray hair, wrinkles, and glasses. Obviously a rather aged man.
"Yes. Dr. Amori?" I already knew who he was.
"Yes. Um, do you think I can speak to you privately?"
I took a glance at Shiko and Noas. They were just standing there, confused and calling for their mother. I don't think I could stay any longer, watching my kids like this.
I nodded. He backed away, giving me some room. Now right outside of her room, I was ready for anything. At least, I hope I was.
"The only real thing I'm worried about is her head. It seemed to be the most damaged."
I only nodded.
"She had stitches done, but I'm afraid she might be affected by the gash..."
I didn't like the sound of where this was going, but I had to hear what he had to say.
"It was around the frontal lobe, and was rather severe..."
"Yes, and?"
"Well, my concern is not that she'll be in a comma, but more of a case of-" he was cut off by Shiko's excited voice.
"MOMMY!" I heard her say happily.
Going inside, followed by Dr. Amori, I saw her now awake. Her ruby eyes were open, but she was still laying down. She stared at Shiko confused.
"Mama, you alright?" Naos asked.
She sat up now, the bewildered look still worn.
"Mommy? Mama?" she asked, her voice almost a whisper.
"Yes, that's you Mama." Naosuke said.
"I'm not your mother. Who are you?" she asked, in almost a demanding way.
There was a lump in my throat, as I feared for what might happened.
"Mommy, that's Naos. Your son. And I'm your daughter, Yoshiko."
"I'm sorry, but I don't think I know you." I heard her say, the words almost tearing me apart.
She doesn't know them. She doesn't even recognize her own children. I feared for the worst, when someone tugged at my arm.
I tuned around to see Dr. Amori with a sullen look.
"What's wrong with her? She doesn't know who her own kids are." I whispered, my voice beginning to crack.
"I believe my suspicions were correct. Mr. Ishida, she has a case of amnesia."
Amnesia. I wasn't sure what to say, I was actually speechless.
"I-...how- why?..." As I tried looking for the words, I heard Naos' voice chime in.
"Mommy! Are you playing a game? Don't you know who I am?" His voice sounded odd. A mixture of fear and joy mixed together. I turned towards their direction, my breath caught in my throat again.
Her crimson eyes staring straight into his, still at a loss.
I turned back to face Dr. Amori, my words now found.
"How serious is it?"
"Well, from what I can tell already, it's a case of retrograde amnesia," he looked down at his clipboard and then back at me, "meaning, she has loss her memory from before the accident."
"I see..."
"Usually amnesia cases last a few seconds to a few hours. However, they can also last for days, weeks, and months. And even rarely, years. I'm afraid hers might not last as long as minutes or hours. I still can't tell though."
"Do you have an idea of how long It could last?"
Again he took a glance at his clipboard, lifted his glasses, put them back on, and then stared at me again.
"Depending on how severe her wound was, I'd say maybe a few weeks or a couple months. But, this isn't certain," he looked over to her, and with a sigh back at me, "I'm a bit surprised she's so calm about it. Sometimes amnesia victims become hostile."
"She doesn't remember anything..." I said more to myself. She doesn't remember Naosuke, Yoshiko, or even me.
I've lost her...
"Well, I'm sure her memory will come back. In the mean time, you must help her remember."
"How?"
"Show her photo albums, or tell her of some memories you shared with her. You'll know when she's healing. Her memory may not come back right away, all at once. Bits of memory should come back to her, the oldest ones first and then the recent ones. Although there are some medicines that help accelerate the regaining of the memory, I think it's best she doesn't take any. Most them I think, won't help that much. Also, I think it's best for her system for no medication."
I nodded, understanding.
"Her wrist should heal its self in about a month. If you don't mind, I'd like to ask her some things. If you would just leave for a minute. I think a few other people are coming to visit her.
Turning around, I saw my confused ex-wife along with my, just as confused, children. She really was calm about everything, not even raising her voice. Then again, she's always been like that, never wanting to attract attention.
Maybe...maybe I haven't lost her just yet.
"Daddy, what happened to Mommy? She doesn't know us." Shiko asked, almost at tears.
"C'mon Shiko, Naos. Let's leave the doctor alone for a minute." I told them, my voice almost a whisper.
I picked up Naosuke, and took Shiko's hand.
Taking another look at her, we exited her room. We stood, in front of the doorway. My breathing increased, although I'm not sure when. I stared at the floor, recalling everything.
She's last person to deserve this.
"Yamato?" I heard a familiar voice call. I turned to my left, and saw him coming in my direction.
"Yamato...is she alright?" he asked, finally reaching me.
"Tai... Well, she's breathing..." I wasn't sure what to say about how she was. I put Naosuke down on the chair next to us, and Yoshiko followed him.
"Hi unckie Tai. Why are you here?" Naosuke asked, happy to see his "unckie" Tai.
"Did you come to see Mommy? Something's wrong with her. She says she doesn't know us." Yoshiko asked, the sadness in her voice evident. How do I explain their's mother's disorder to them?
He gave them a kind smile, and gave them both a kiss on the forehead.
"Yes I am. Don't worry, I'm sure your mother will be fine, I've known her since forever, and she's not one to go down without a fight." he had no idea what she was fighting, but he knew it was important.
His brown eyes found their way on me. That was when I noticed what he was wearing. His brown hair, now short, was rather messy. Obviously he had been rushing. He was wearing a black suit, and a dark blue collared shirt underneath. A coffee stain was on his shirt, and I saw that he was missing his tie.
"Did you come here from work?" I asked, making small talk. He could tell I didn't want to talk about it right away. He waked closer towards me, as I moved back.
"Yeah, I just finished a meeting. I spilled my coffee from rushing over here," then his face become serious, "Yamato, tell me. Is she alright? What happened? And what is Yoshi talking about?" he whispered in a demanding way.
We somehow ended up next to a water cooler, a few feet away from the kids. Still keeping a watchful eye on them, I answered his questions.
"She will be alright, but she won't be the same," I looked up at him, and saw that he was a bit confused, "all she has is a fractured wrist, and stitches to the head."
"Oh, is she awake?"
"Yeah, but the doctor's with her right now. Well, I guess you already know she was in a car accident."
He nodded, and then added, "The doctor told me. Then I heard it on the news. Now what, was Yoshi talking about?"
I sighed, and prepared myself.
"She has, amnesia. The doctor said it usually lasts for a few seconds or minutes, but the gash is pretty severe. So he said it might take weeks or months for her to regain her memory."
He was shocked and saddened by the news. I could tell, that he too, was speechless about it.
"Apparently, she should recover from it. Her memory won't come back all at once, we'll have to help remember."
"I...I can't believe this. Well, I guess...it could be worst." he said, giving me a sad smile.
"You're right, it could be worse. At least, she's still with us."
Just then, Dr. Amori came out of the room.
"Taichi Kamiya, correct?"
He nodded, his face stern again.
"Is it okay if I visit her?"
"Yes, but I thought Mr. Ishida would like to visit her alone first." His gaze fixed on me.
"Sure. Tai, watch the kids please?" he nodded, and I entered the room while Dr. Amori closed the door for me.
I took in my surroundings. Here I was, alone in a hospital room with my amnesiac ex-wife. The stench of the building becoming familiar to me now. I stepped forward, closer towards her.
She was sitting now, looking outside the window. The rain coming down, but very softly. As if in a trance, she continued to stare at it, even when I was by her side. I heard her let out a soft sigh.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, my voice surprisingly steady and low.
She finally broke her gaze, at stared at me. Her angelic face still looking puzzled.
"Fine, I suppose. But my head does heard a little, and so does my wrist." She talked to me, like she knew me. Did she somehow remember me?
"I think that's how you're supposed to feel. I mean, how do you feel about the amnesia?" my voice became a little louder, but still gentle.
"Oh that...I'm still confused. I can't believe it happened. I don't even know who I am."
"You are Sora Takenouchi. You're thirty five years old, and an international fashion designer. However, I don't think you'll be able to do that for awhile."
"Wow...international?" she said out loud, but to herself.
"I'm sorry to ask, but who are you?"
At her words, my heart began to ache. So, she doesn't remember who I am. As much as I wanted to deny it, I knew it wouldn't help. She doesn't know me.
Although she's still physically here, for some reason, it feels as though I really had lost her.
"I was you husband, and you were my wife." I said, seeing those rubies she calls eyes, fill with confusion again. I knew the answer, but I didn't want to say. For some reason, it seemed too hard to.
"Was? Were?" Again, my heart ached.
"We're divorced." There, I said it. Then she said something I hadn't expected, but then again I wasn't really sure what she'd say.
"I'm sorry." Her voice so soft, that I almost didn't even hear. Her eyes were fixed on the white sheet around her, as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.
"It's okay. Don't worry about that right now. I'm going to help take care of you, to help you remember." My voice becoming more gentle, as she looked back at me.
"Oh, well thank you. But, I don't even know who you are. Well, I mean I don't know your name." To have to explain all of this to her, to have to explain things later on, makes my heart skip a beat. I don't know If I can handle this. But, if it means I'm helping bring back the Sora I know, then I'll do anything.
"My name is Yamato Ishida, and the little boy that was here earlier is Naosuke Ishida, our son. The girl is Yoshiko Takenouchi, our daughter."
"Their names are different. Does that mean I kept Yoshiko, and you kept Naosuke?"
"Yes, but they still visit each other, as much as they can."
"They must hate me."
"What?"
"I couldn't even recognize my own children. They must hate me."
"No they don't. They could never hate, especially for this. It's not your fault. If you want, I'll have them come visit you. And Tai too."
"Tai?"
"He's our best and your oldest friend. You two have known each other your entire lives, he's practically your brother. He's really worried about you, and wants to see you too."
"I'd like for them to visit me. Thank you, you already helped me."
"Tai will help you remember too, along with our other friends."
"Do you and I share the same friends?"
"Well, most of them. Our closest ones, yes."
"I see, can they come in now?"
I nodded, and headed towards the door. That wasn't as bad I thought it would be, she really was calm about it.
"Tai?" I stood behind the door, it creaked open.
"Yeah?"
I walked out of the room, and stood next to him. I noticed the doctor gone.
"Where's Dr. Amori?"
"He went to go check on the patient next door. Well, how is she?"
"She's actually very well. She's taking it all very calmly and easily. She seems to understand."
"Can I visit her?"
"Yeah, you and the kids. Don't worry, I told her about you already."
I looked over at Shiko and Naos. They were sitting patiently with lollipops in their hands.
"Where'd you two get those? Did Tai give those to you?"
"No, the doctor gave them to us. Isn't that nice?" Shiko replied with a toothy grin. It made me happy to see her smile.
"And you thought I gave them some lousy lollipops," Tai said in a joking tone, "I give them cookies AND candy."
I let out a small laugh. It was just like Tai to try to lighten a darken mood.
"You two can go visit Mommy now, if you want."
"Otay. Is she all better now?" Naosuke asked. A frown came to my face, I hate being the one to give them bad news.
"Well, she knows who you are, but she doesn't really remember you. Listen, you mother forgot everything. Meaning, she can't remember who she is, or who you are. Now she does, but we're going to have to help her remember. Okay?"
"Otay." Naosuke replied.
They got up, and the four of us went back into the room. I could tell Tai felt a bit uneasy, seeing Sora in a hospital. But then again, who wouldn't be?
"Hello again." I said to her.
"Hello. I see I have more visitors." she said with a smile, helping Tai calm down a bit. I heard him sigh, as he approached her.
"Are you feeling alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine. Thank your for asking...Tai was it?"
He nodded, a smile worn his face.
"I'm glad you at least know my name."
"It's nice meeting you. Yamato told me about you."
The children walked over to her next. Shiko was just staring at her, while Naosuke grinned. This must have been hard for her. She understands how serious this is, and she was always one to keep quiet during hard times.
"Hi Mommy! Do you renemeber me now?"
"Well, you're Naosuke, my son. Right?" he nodded, happily.
"And you must Yoshiko. You're very pretty, you should smile." Sora said gently. She acted as though she were a friend of mine, just meeting everyone for the first time. Well, I guess she was meeting them for the first time again, but she didn't really friendly.
Shiko smiled, a genuine one. She reminded me too much of me.
"Yes, I'm Yoshiko. Are you okay Mommy?"
"Yes, I'm fine. How old are you Yoshiko?"
"Six and three quarters." she answered through her smile.
"My, six is a pretty big number. And how old are you?"
"I'm..uh...," Naosuke counted on his fingers, and held out three of them, "this many."
"Three, you look too big to be three. Are you sure you're not lying to me?"
He shook his head vigorously.
She let out a giggle. Then turned her gaze towards me.
"They're so beautiful, are you sure they're my children?" she asked me, the smile still worn on her face.
"Of course they are, they have most of your looks." I saw through the corner of my eye, Tai with a huge grin.
A knock came from the door, and entered Dr. Amori.
"Excuse me, but I think it's best if you leave her for now."
I nodded, and we said our goodbyes to Sora.
"Goodbye, it was nice meeting all of you." She said with a wave.
As we exited the room, Dr. Amori called to me.
"Mr. Ishida?"
"Yes?" I asked, staying behind.
"I'll have the receptionist tell you when you can come back. I'm sure you take her home by today."
I nodded, and exited the room.
"Well, that went pretty well." Tai said.
"Yeah, I guess." I glanced over towards the kids. Shiko had the lollipop in her mouth, and was now trying to help Naos open his.
"You think she's beautiful?" I heard Tai's voice ask.
"Yes, who doesn't? And don't start anything Tai."
"What? This is just like highschool. You two flirting, and then falling in love." Ever since we divorced, he always tried to help us get back together. He would help in anyway he could. And even this case wasn't different.
"Tai, this is nothing like highschool. This is really serious. We could have lost Sora. And don't bring up things like love." I know I said that rather harsh, but I just couldn't take it.
All that emotion that built up today, just needed to get out. And that wasn't enough to let it out.
"I'm sorry. I just trying to lighten the mood."
"I know, I'm just a little stressed out."
"So, what are you going to do? I mean, can she go home?"
"I'm not sure. I don't think she should be living by herself with Shiko..."
"So you're thinking of having her live with you, until she recovers?" He asked, with a somewhat sly intention in his voice.
"Yes, if it's best. I wouldn't mind though. It would be nice being with Shiko longer."
"Are you sure just Yoshi? What about Sora? Don't you miss her too." I knew what he was getting at now.
"I admit, I miss her Tai. But nothing's going to happen. We're divorced, and there's nothing I could do about it."
"Well, I'm sure it will all work out. Living with an amnesiac Sora shouldn't be that bad."
Yes, living with my ex-wife, who lost her memory, whom I still have feelings for, shouldn't be bad. Although I won't admit it, this does help in my favor. I really do miss her...
A/n: finished! I did that pretty fast, well considering I just started this chapter a few days ago.
I don't really like how that came out though. Mostly dialogue.
Next to be updated will be Jumping The Fence, then Her Sad Smile, then Luminaries. And then maybe my new story, unless I don't do He Sad Smile and start my new story.
R&r.