Lost But Not Yet Broken
Chapter 9: Ambivalence
AN: I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY! I didn't mean to take that long I swear. It's just with work, getting sick, not being able to get this freaking chapter organized, beta reading, going to school, homework, and going insane you know it's kind of a load. But a well I finished it didn't I? That should count for something. *cringes from evil glares coming from readers* Well here it is chapter 9. hopefully I've still got most of my readers. God knows my reviews are gonna suffer.
MD: Hey nooooooo I'm broke damn Christmas!
Harry: Broke are we and yet I remain filthy rich.
Draco: not like you have any sense of individuality to actually use it.
Harry: Hey! I resent that!
Severus: Wow. Potter you are capable of speaking without drooling.
Harry: I'm emotionally traumatized not stupid!
MD: guys please! Or I swear I'll tie you all to the freaking wall!
(Severus, Draco, Harry look at Lucius who is still struggling to remove his gag)
Severus: well I think it's an improvement don't you agree Draco.
Draco: oh yeah very good improvement don't you think so Harry?
Harry: no frankly I think he looks stupid tied and gagged……
MD: *sees red*
Harry: eep!
Warnings: Flashbacks, Lucius, Severus, Draco in all his cute/Malfoy ways, Harry god Harry more Harry woohoo!
P.S. I am not responsible for what shall occur in this chapter. Oh yeah and has anyone found a disk labeled MD's brain. Yeah I backed it up again and lost it go figure *girgle*. Anyway on to the chap.
* blah* Draco's little voice.
'blah' Draco's thoughts.
*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*
Never was and never will be
You don't know how you've betrayed me
And somehow you've got everybody fooled
Without the mask where will you hide
Can't find yourself lost in your lie
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~
"Draco! Are you ready?" cried Lucius Malfoy from the bottom of the grand staircase which rested in Malfoy Manor.
"Almost father!" yelled an eleven year old Draco Malfoy who currently found himself under his bed searching for a lost object.
'Damn it! Where is it? Merlin I never knew there was so much junk under my bed.'
*I told you before to clean it out.*
'Shut up you. I've no time for you.'
*Ok let's recap shall we. Five years and you still haven't figured out that I'm you!*
'Then why are you telling me you are me when I am you and you are ……'
*yeah don't hurt yourself now.*
'Shut up and help me look'
*Still looking for it huh? What makes you think he'll accept it?*
'He's my friend.'
*right….. like he even understands that. He just follows you around like a body guard.*
'He got bigger than me so?'
*bigger. Yeah. Sure.*
'I swear if I wasn't so scared that father would have me examined again I'd tell him to get rid of you!'
*But then you'd be getting rid of yourself.*
Draco gave an insufferable sigh as he racked a hand through his soft silky hair, "Dragon" as he had deemed the voice in his head was being a particular prick today. Having already been frustrated with the fact that he couldn't find a certain item for Harry had him already wired and between his father and Dragon he was going to snap soon.
Harry. He was a puzzlement to the blond boy. It had been approximately four years since he had met the black haired, emerald eyed boy. Four years that Draco tried relentlessly to get the boy to open up, to smile, to laugh, anything besides his apathetic nature. Four years of mutual success for Harry Potter only smiled for Draco and only talked for Severus, Lucius, and Draco. In turn the boy had become like a protector to the blond boy, always by his side making sure the dark didn't hurt him and for that Draco would always be grateful. Memories brought the blond back to a time when the emerald eyed boy first smiled at him.
*~*~*~*~*Flashback*~*~*~*~*
Nine year old Draco flew with stumbling grace around the mini-sized Quidditch pit that currently belonged to Snape Manor. Though small, the blond was nothing if not graceful on a broom. He twirled and dived, twisted and turned, flipped and nearly gave Lucius a heart attack but through it all the boy maintained a true Malfoy grace.
Meanwhile, a stoic and passive Harry stood next to an emaculate Severus Snape as he watched the blond boy fly. Harry had refused Draco's invitation to go flying and had prompted to merely watching the boy. Severus had wondered if the choice was due to Harry's lack of knowledge in wizarding sports or if the boy did not feel himself worthy of flying with Draco and engaging in recreational activity. Whatever the case Severus had decided to allow the boy his choice, Harry however remained completely impassive about the sport and truly had not cared for it at all, preferring to watch instead.
Draco became so engrossed in his flying that he hadn't noticed the giant looming figure flying in his direct path. As the creature grew nearer, Draco turned his attention right at the last minute and saw only red violent eyes approaching him at an incredible speed. The creature was none like he had ever seen, sporting long demonic bat like wings oh its back and long muscular arms covered in pitch black fur and silvery long talons, it had no hind legs except for a long fur covered tail that swayed from side to side and ended with scale covered spikes. Its mouth, long and narrow and a white crescent scar under its right all was all that differed from the creatures entirely black appearance. Draco hardly even heard the loud cries from his godfather telling him to move out of the way as the boy continued to stare into those red piercing eyes. As the creature neared even closer its jaw clamped tightly shut, Draco finally snapped out of his reverie and veered away from the creature's path. The creature seemingly passed by without a moments glance at the blond frightened boy however, its tail was another story. Without noticing the midnight creature's tail had struck the back of Draco's broom causing him to veer out of control and straight to the ground.
Severus quickly retracted his wand from his holster, hidden deep within the folds of his robes, and aimed for the plummeting boy. However, his levitation spell was unable to completely immobilize the boy from crashing because of the speed at which he was falling. Severus could only stare in silent horror as the boy continued to plummet and then, out of the corner of his eye something caught his attention. If the raven haired man had not been as sharp eyed as he was the object would of seemed like a mere blur in the night sky, but, he could make out the crop of ebony hair and small yet strong build of an emerald eyed boy who he could of sworn had been beside him only mere seconds ago.
Draco closed his eyes tightly bracing himself for the upcoming impact and pain that would accompany the fall. However, it never came, instead he felt himself being grabbed roughly. The blond opened his eyes rapidly to see what had grabbed him, fearing that it had been the creature he had seen. Instead he gazed into steel emerald eyes. At that moment he realized that Harry had flown via broom straight into Draco, grabbed him and were now plummeting forward towards the forest only a mere few feet from the ground. Draco felt his head being grasped tightly under the raven haired boy's chin as they crashed through branches and twigs, Harry taking the majority of the hits cushioning Draco's fall. Finally Draco more felt than heard Harry back hit the ground a skid across it for a good eight or ten feet. Through out it all, never, did the blond here his friend make not even a remote sound of pain upon impact. The raven haired boy had remained silent bearing the pain of the fall completely on himself while he shielded Draco.
Draco opened his eyes again warily as he looked up at Harry who had a small trickle of blood flowing from the corner of his lip down his chin, his cloths torn and dirty, and his bare arms and now back covered in scratches and welts caused by the unforgiving forces of nature. Draco wanted to cry for his friend and scream at him. He couldn't understand why the raven haired boy would let himself get hurt like that for him. Suddenly, a loud piercing screech that sounded more like an alleviating serenade, than a predatory cry, resounded loudly above them, removing all previous thoughts form the young blonde's mind.
The red eyed creature flew above them, black wings and fur glistening under the moon's light. The creature paused in its song to look at the two fallen boys and then turned and flew off into the depths of the night sky.
"What was that thing?" asked Draco to know one in particular; knowing Harry would not have the answer either.
"Are you okay Draco?" asked Harry passively. Draco turned to look at the boy noticing his condition; he quickly removed himself off the raven haired boy.
"I'm okay Harry but what about you?"
Harry only looked at him, perplexity playing in his emerald eyes "What do you mean?"
"Harry you're bleeding! And look at your arms and back! Aren't you in pain?"
"Pain is what I am Draco. I promised."
"Promised what?" asked Draco confused.
"I would keep the dark away from you." Said Harry apathetically, Draco was dumbfounded but then his eyes watered slightly and he smiled tenderly at Harry who gave him a small and almost unrecognizable smile back.
*~*~*~*~*~* End Flashback*~*~*~*~*~*
After that small speck of a smile, Severus had caught up to them. Both Draco and he had been utterly shocked as they watched Harry begin to stand up be it slowly, but still the fact that a nine year old boy could still stand after a fall like that had left them both stupefied and had left Severus wondering just how much the boy's resistance to pain had grown during his imprisonment with those muggles.
Later, they had learned from Severus that the creature was called a Matulo, a generally non aggressive creature that only appears at night under the moon's light. Its body was strong and powerful but the creature itself was quite gentle despite its fearsome eyes and talons. It would only attack those who attacked it first or its kin. Draco however, still did not like the creature all that much but the glint in Harry's eyes had told them that the boy had at least some mild interest in the thing.
"Draco!"
Draco hit his head under the bed as his father's call had startled him out of his memories. Finally seeing what he was looking for, he grabbed the trinket and bolted out of the room.
"Coming father!"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Lucius wondered about his son the relationship that was developing between him and the raven haired boy currently living with Severus.
Over the past four years Harry had learned how to read properly and at least speak more than four word sentences. He interacted with the others but always remained passive and apathetic towards everything and anything, only smiling slightly at Draco occasionally or asking questions about potions and dark arts to Severus and Lucius. He hardly demonstrated any feelings at all and tended to either keep himself secluded or with Draco most of the time.
Lucius was also quite surprised at how much the raven haired boy had grown during the last few years. It was amazing what proper feeding and activity could do to a body. He had grown considerably and now stood at least four inches taller than Draco and it was clear that the boy was strong and powerful simply by comparing that of his son's to his. Not that Draco was weak or anything, he just possessed a less rugged body structure, almost feminine like really, aristocratic, like a true Malfoy.
Lucius watched as his son made his way down the grand staircase of Malfoy manor.
"Draco is your trunk still upstairs?"
"Yes father. You said you would get it for me."
"Yes well might as well do it now a quick since we are running late." Lucius pulled out his wand and pointed it towards the top of the staircase.
"Uh father, I don't think……."
"Not now Draco. ACCIO DRACO'S TRUNK!" shouted Lucius not realizing that in his haste to get the trunk down he had used too much force in his spell. Lucius found himself ducking faster than you could say 'quidditch' as the trunk came hurling down the stairs and straight towards Lucius. Face on the floor the tall silver blond cringed as he heard priceless antiquity glass shatter as the trunk hit them. Canceling the spell, the silver blond lifted himself off the ground with as much dignity as he could muster, which wasn't much.
Draco stood in a corner desperately trying not to laugh at his father. However, a few small snickers escaped him and ended up bringing his father's attention towards him instead of the trunk that he was currently bad mouthing with a passion.
"Not one word to Severus about this Draco. Not. One." warned Lucius.
"Sure father. I won't tell Uncle Severus a thing. But ……."
"But what?"
"Well, what are you going to tell mother about the glass sculpture that can't be repaired with a mending spell. After all, that was her favorite one." Draco smirked at the look of pure horror on his father's face.
"Damn. Okay this is what we are going to do…"
*You know you never cease to amaze me.*
'Oh? How so?'
*I mean come on like you are really going to help him cover this up.*
'I would so help. After all I'm the lovable son and mother just adores me'
*Of course she does, just like she adored that glass sculpture which was sculpted in your likeness.*
'What!'
*You didn't know? How could you not of known? I knew.*
'Just because you know doesn't mean I know'
*Okay, let's run this by you again shall we. I am just a figment of your imagination.*
'Right…….and I'm the great wizard Merlin in all his cute glory. Hahah very funny.'
*That made no sense.*
'Yes it did'
*To who? The Queen of England?*
'No, who is that?'
*Nevermind.*
'You know what just go away.'
*Sure, oh and by the way – your father is lucking at you again.*
'Damn you!'
Sure enough Draco found himself looking into the eyes of a concerned Lucius.
"Draco I think you need to ………" the silver blond man was cut off by a loud shriek, causing him to cringe.
"Lucius what have you done!?"
*~*~*~*~**~*~*~**~**~~*~*
An: Hah! I'm done! Yeah not much Harry in this chapter sorry, but I thought since hey I couldn't really fit the chapter very well like I wanted it then I improvised by having it from mostly Draco's point of view. Heheheh. Aren't I a genius. Obviously not as much angst here as the other chapters cause well it's Draco come on! But the next chapter they'll meet Hermione and ron and more angst hhahahahhahaahhahahahah. Well I'm finishing this up during my lunch from work so I have to go now. I can't to the individual review responses this time either but I promise I'll do them in the next chapter k. cool.
MD: Ok. ROLLCALL!
(Severus, Lucius, Draco, and Harry line up)
MD: Alright you two *points at Severus and Lucius* stay. Now you two *points at Harry and Draco who gulp audibly*
Draco: what we do?
Harry: what ever he did I had no part of!
Draco: you traitorous bastard!
Harry: takes one to know one.
Draco: now that's just cliché for you
Harry: I know but she's practically had me as a vegetable for like eight chapters now.
Draco: true.
MD: *throbbing vein* shut up. Now you have to decide it's either BDL or I choose and choose wisely.
(Severus and Lucius playing chess in the background, but secretly placing bets under the table and who kills them first.)
Draco and Harry: Um. BDL.
MD: what?
Draco and Harry: I mean you.
BDL: what?
Draco and Harry: *hug each other and start crying* please don't hurt us!
BDL: you made them cry.
MD: no that was you.
BDL: yeah well I didn't give them crack now did I
MD: I told you. You were the one on that crap not them stop hallucinating god!
BDL: shut up slut!
MD: whore!
BDL: tramp!
MD: bitch!
BDL: Voldermort sex slave!
MD: don't use your occupation to dis me!
BDL: ……….