AN: Alright, loves, another chapter...hopefully more interesting that the last...and preferably with a better chapter ending. Ho di hum. I should be studying for exams. I will, of course, just taking a light break...also, I thank those who thought this idea was original. X3 X3 Hurrah to readers. I heart you all.
AN 2: This is post-exams. I was going to post this a week ago...but I didn't finish it, so yeah. But now I have, so feed, my lovelies. Also...why is this posting system automatically changing my format? My dialogue should be indented, my section breaks asterisks, and I sometimes like to accentuate question marks with exclamation marks (or have three exclamation marks in a row)...but they always ditch them into one exclamation mark...what is the world coming to?
Disclaimer: I forgot to put one up before. I do not own Naruto, else Gaara, Neji, Kiba, and Kakashi will all be my slaves, and I would have stolen Shikamaru's brain.
Chapter 2: Operation Get-Sasuke and Kiba gets molested
"Okay...so..." Hinata started to twiddle her fingers. "What's going on?" They were all sitting in Neji's apartment, and it seemed they have a lot of explaining to do to the young Hyuuga heir. Kiba cleared his throat.
"Erm...these two young men we have here are not some people we met during a mission...rather, they're Sakura and Ino." A moment of silence passed to allow Hinata to register what Kiba just said.
"I beg your pardon?" First Stage, initial shock. When Neji told her before, she didn't quite get what he was saying, as he said he'll explain later, and so she decided to wait until they stopped moving to ask again. She couldn't believe what she just heard. "But that's impossible!" Second Stage, denial.
"Well, both of us saw their Chakra Signatures, Hinata-sama, and Kiba and Akamaru recogised their scent." Ichiro suddenly piped in.
"So, Kiba, how's life going for you when you go around smelling other people's odours?"
"Shut up, I saved your arse back there." Kiba spat, sticking up his middle finger, giving Ichiro the one fingered salute. Hinata blinked rapidly. Then again, apart from their overall appearance, Sakui and Ichiro did have the exact same hair, eye and skin colour as Sakura and Ino. And that Ichiro definitely had Ino's sass when he was teasing Kiba. Third Stage, deduction.
"I can't believe it's true..." Fourth Stage, crossing over. "How did this happen?" Final Stage, acceptance. Sakui and Ichiro told their story again. Hinata was very calm during the whole telling. As they finished, she shook her head.
"This must be so hard for you, Sakura-san and Ino-san." she empathised. Sakui and Ichiro glared at Neji and Kiba, for their insensitive initial reactions to their story previously.
"Why can't you be like her!" they hissed in unison. Neji had to hold Kiba down before he leapt on them.
"Kiba, just because they look like guys now, doesn't mean you can beat them up...like guys." Another moment of awkward silence. Sakui decided to ignore this and continued.
"So, to break the spell, Sasuke-kun must fall in love with me, no matter what I look like..." Ichiro fumed.
"Excuse me? He must fall in love with me! Why don't you go find another guy..." They started bickering amongst themselves again. Hinata raised her hand to get their attention.
"Ano...guys...but haven't heard?" Sakui and Ichiro stopped fighting to allow their friend to talk. Hinata blushed. "Sasuke-kun...is...erm...going out with someone."
More silence. Except this was caused by shock. Hence, it was followed by:
"WHAT!" Not only did Sakui and Ichiro thundered, but Kiba also shouted in surprise with them. Neji didn't know this either, but as if he'll shout and lose his dignity.
"Naruto-kun told me yesterday...he was the first to find out...he wanted to find you, Sakura-san, to tell you, but you weren't around."
Sakui and Ichiro felt as if the environment around them went black and they were being flushed down the toilet. Akamaru barked and interrupted their despair. Kiba nodded.
"Yeah, why don't you guys go find that witch again?" Kiba suggested. "Maybe if you suck up to her or something, she'll reverse the spell." Hinata clapped, brimming with excitement.
"Kiba-kun, that's a great idea!" Kiba blushed, grinning excessively.
"Of course, I am our group leader."
"You should go now! I would come with you, but I have something to do for my father..." Hinata sighed. Ichiro frowned.
"But we don't know how to get there! it was just some random cave we popped into..."
"Why dontchya back track..." Kiba suggested. Neji nodded. Sakui sighed. If it's to revert back to their normal forms, they might as well try.
"Alright, we'll do it. It's the best plan we've got." He agreed. Neji stood up, he face in different.
"That's settled then. Sakura and Ino will go find the witch, but someone must go with them. Hinata-sama has to do things for Uncle, while I cannot come either. ANBU business." Neji said. Neji and Hinata then turned their gazes onto Kiba. Kiba frowned. He knew what they wanted.
"Why do I hafta to go!" he demanded. Neji smirked.
"You have no say in this."
"Please, Kiba-kun, if we two could do it, we would have already done so." Hinata pleaded. Yeah right. This is a waste of time. Neji pondered. Kiba looked at Hinata's innocent face. He closed his eyes, temple veins pulsing.
"Alright...I'll go." He answered unusually calmly. "But if I come back anything different from when I left, I don't care if you're more powerful than me, but I will definitely and most happily kill you." Kiba pointed straight at Neji. He smirked. And not Hinata-sama. Right. Kiba turned to the two she-men.
"We're leaving. Now."
---
It took them half a day to find that despicable cave, mostly due to the fact that Sakui and Ichiro were extremely clumsy to the shinobi style, not used to their new bodies. However, thanks to Kiba/Akamaru's nose (they sniffed out the smoke from the candles) and Sakui's cleverness, they managed to find it. Or so they thought.
"It looks like a mass of trees." Ichiro commented. Sakui stuck his hand into the illusion.
"See? Illusion. She did it to hide her position. Seems like the illusion theory was correct." Sakui entered the cave, his body rippling the illusion of trees. Ichiro, Kiba and Akamaru followed him. They were met by the exact same candles as before.
"Amazing...the wax isn't melting or dripping at all..." Kiba remarked with interest, Akamaru barking in agreement. They continued their trek through the caves, until Sakui tripped over a fold from a roughly placed rug. Ichiro rolled his eyes as he ran to his friend's side.
"Not again." he muttered, as he pulled Sakui up.
"Klutz." They were welcomed by a familiar voice owned by the woman who turned their lives upside-down. Same position as she was yesterday, lounging on her couch. She smiled at them. "Oh, it's you two again. It amazing how you can find this place again." Then she saw there was a third person. Her eyes light up. An actual being from the male species. And not only that, he wasn't bad looking. In fact, while his friends haven't noticed it, Kiba has actually grown into quite a handsome man, with his strong angular pointed face, and his well built body, not too thin, not overly muscular. The witch smiled at the newcomer.
"Please, sit down. Let me take your coat." She welcomed Kiba. Kiba raised an eyebrow in confusion, but not wanting to insult anyone, he took off his faux-fur rimmed hooded jacket, and handed it to her. She saw his leather armoured vest. Kiba didn't wear his Jounin flac jacket, as he had no need for it. "That vest looks so heavy! Take that off too." Wait a minute...Kiba thought as he took of his vest, leaving him with only his black mesh t-shirt on. He sat down before the witch can say anything else. He glanced over at Sakui and Ichiro, who were snickering. Looked like they caught on too.
The witch threw his jacket and vest at Sakui and Ichiro, who, in defense, caught the items before they hit their handsome faces. They growled quietly at the witch, who placed her self next to Kiba, arm over his shoulders. Too close. He began to shuffle away from her.
"Hi...erm, I'm here to - "
"Ask for a wish?" The witch said seductively, fingering Kiba's biceps. "Ask anything you want, if you agree to the issue of payment."
"Wha - ?" Kiba was interrupted by the witch lunging on top of him. "I think you misunderstand...I'm here to ask - " He blushed. She was molesting him! Her hand was going under his mesh shirt, and she was stroking his abdominal muscles. Thank god he wasn't ticklish. What Kiba found disturbing was his strength was no match for hers. He could not struggle, let alone sit up. He wondered who was stronger, the Fifth Hokage, Tsunade, or this scary woman. " - if you could reverse the spell for those two over there." At this point Sakui and Ichiro looked incredibly hopeful, wondering if she could reverse it. They felt no remorse for their friend, thinking he probably enjoyed the "attention", not knowing that he was, in fact, negatively overwhelmed. The witch, however, was busy noticing other issues.
"Very interesting! I thought the bodies I gave those two where the hottest male bodies up for grabs...but yours is absolutely perfect! If I met you before them, they would definitely be having a copy of your body..."
"Are you even listening to me?" Kiba's impatience took over his fear. The witch smiled at him.
"Accomplished dreams cannot be reversed. It's my policy." She whispered. However, it was loud enough for the other two to hear. Kiba frowned.
"Look, that'll be my wish. Turn them back!" He fumed. "Also, I think what you're doing to me already covers the issue of payment..." The witch's hand began to find the rim of Kiba's pants " And keep your hands away from my pants! That's a no-go zone!"
"But you said it covers payment."
"Don't push your luck." Kiba glared. The witch sighed. She sat up, taking her hand away from under Kiba's shirt.
"I told you. I can't reverse such spells. They can only be broken by the set requirements." She sighed. Kiba looked furious.
"You're going back on the deal!" He shouted as he straightened his shirt. "You said that you will give me what ever I wished for! I WISH FOR THIS! CHANGE THEM BACK!" Sakui and Ichiro were shocked at his outburst. The witch was silent. It seemed there was no changing the will of the witch. Both youths glanced at each other, and nodded, understanding what they should do. They turned to Kiba.
"Look, Kiba, we'll find a way to reverse the spell. Ourselves. We don't need her." Ichiro said, his voice gentle. Sakui nodded in agreement, his face complacent.
"So, wish for something for yourself." Sakui added. Kiba glared at them.
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? I came here for one reason, and one reason only...to get you two back to normal!" Sakui remained defiant.
"Naruto once told me that you were waiting for Akamaru to speak like Kakashi-sensei's nin-dogs, like Pakkun!" They looked at the small white dog. Ichiro understood what should follow.
"Witch! If you cannot change us back, then help Akamaru talk! For Kiba! For Akamaru is Kiba's dearest companion!" Ichiro cried out. His voice echoed the caves. Kiba waved his arm aside.
"What! Akamaru can talk! He can say 'Happy New Year' quite fluently!" Awkward silence.
"So can a parrot." Ichiro replied, unimpressed. The witch stood up, and walked to Akamaru, who was barking threateningly at her. But with a flick of her hand, he was able to say:
"Woof! Get away from me! Woof!" in a rather cute voice, which caused everyone to say:
"Aw..." Kiba grabbed his dog excitedly.
"Akamaru!"
"Kiba-sama! Woof!" He was still able to bark normally, but now, he could also speak. "I can speak now! Now I can tell other people to bugger off when they think it's cute to interrupt my sleep...woof!" Kiba almost cried.
"He's not just repeating 'Happy New Year' again and again and scaring the shit out of people..." Kiba hugged his furry friend. "This is the happiest day in my life! Erm, I mean...damn you, witch! This is not what I wanted! We're leaving!" Kiba stood up, Akamaru following. He grabbed his jacket and vest from his two friends and marched outside. Sakui and Ichiro smiled. That's Kiba for you. They followed him, giving only a glance back to the witch. She watched them walk out of her cave, smiling serenely.
"Interesting. Very interesting. Such loyal friends. Despite their situation, I'm sure those two will get out of it just fine. They're good people. And that young man..." The witch chuckled. "...he's got looks and personality! Bah, I want a man like that..."
---
"What just happened between me and the witch, will never, ever leave this cave, got that!" Kiba waved his finger threatening at the two youths.
"Never ever."
"My lips are sealed." Ichiro and Sakui gave each other mischievous grins and sly glances. Just wait till Hinata get her ears around this. Kiba, however, seemed oblivious to the non-verbal communication occurring between the two boys.
"How are we gonna explain me, woof?" Akamaru barked. Kiba answered him immediately.
"Spontaneous vocal development."
---
"Neji-kun! It's already six thirty pm, and they still haven't returned yet! I wonder if they're okay..." Hinata was staring outside Neji's apartment window, twiddling her fingers nervously as usual. Neji was lounging on his double recliner sofa, reading a newspaper.
"They'll be back. At least before eight." He replied, not even bothering to look up from his paper. Hinata bit her lip nervously, turning around only to give Neji an unimpressed look. It was during this time when Kiba, Sakui and Ichiro marched down the street, and turned into the apartment block. Hinata turned back to the window, only to miss the whole arrival. She was completely startled by the loud banging on the door, and the familiar cry of:
"Open the door, goddamn!" Kiba. Neji stood up and calmly went to the door, opening it, giving Kiba a scolding look.
"Quiet, you don't want the whole neighbourhood to hear, now, do you?" He allowed the three young men in. Kiba was fuming.
"That bitch wouldn't change them back...said it was against her policy."
"Instead, she got me to talk! Woof!" Akamaru barked happily. Kiba felt betrayed.
"Hey! I said spontaneous vocal development!" Too late. Hinata pondered over this.
"But wait...didn't you say this witch has an issue of payment for wishes to come true..." She asked. Sakui and Ichiro's mouths stretched to reveal devious grins.
"NOOOOOOOO!" Kiba leapt on top of the two, covering their mouths. The two men muffled in protest. Neji rolled his white eyes.
"Now you make it a whole lot more obvious." Neji crossed his arms and pretended to look like his was thinking. "Let's see..." he started cynically "...a woman, living alone, made herself beautiful on purpose...a young, rowdy idiot of a male enters her cave...but considering that he's young, male, and considerably fit..." Neji paused to allow everyone to absorb what he just said, a smirk on his handsome face. Hinata blushed when she understood what he was saying.
"Kiba-kun...you...and the witch...?" She said slowly and quietly, only to hide her gaping mouth with a gasp, and began giggling. Kiba was as red as a beetroot.
"It didn't go that far!" he cried in protest, letting go of his two prisoners. They were now gasping for air.
"BAKA!" they cried, hitting him squarely on the head for what he done to them. Kiba yelped in pain. Neji ignored this, and went on with the torment.
"But, you hinted it yourself, something did happen...just not that far." Neji's grin was more devious than the other two. Kiba couldn't believe what he was seeing. But then again, Neji was an arrogant prick. Kiba shook off all his muddled thoughts. But before he could say anything. Akamaru leapt around joylously and cut before him.
"They was that close to making out, woof!" Silence was followed by deafening hoots of laughter (even Neji couldn't help but laugh lightly), as well as cries of "SHUT UP, YOU BASTARDS!" repeated again and again. Finally, the laughter died down, as those who laughed were dying from the muscle cramps at their stomach area. Kiba took this chance to speak.
"That's not the point! The point is these girls can longer be girls!" Neji paused.
"Yes, that is a serious matter. So which country should we send them too?" Neji questioned Kiba seriously. Hinata held her hands in protest.
"Neji-kun! We should be helping them break the spell, not throw them aside!"
"We don't need their help. They're bastards." Sakui told Hinata. Hinata bit her lip. Kiba growled angrily.
"What! I tried helped you with the witch, you ungrateful - " Kiba was
"Alright. But I doubt they can break the spell anyway." Neji stood up. "When you transform back into girls, write letters saying that you both have decided to take a life-inspired trip for soul searching purposes. That will also mean that you must never show your face to anyone in your female form until the spell is broken. Now for the issue of accommodation..."
"They can stay here. I can't take them in, Hyuugas everywhere..." Hinata piped in. Neji raised an eyebrow.
"There's not enough space."
"Huh?" Sakui questioned. "You live here? I thought you lived with in the Hyuuga residence."
"I did. I actually lived here first, then I moved back after the first Chuunin exam, then I moved back because it's closer to the academy." Neji turned to Kiba. "You might hafta take the other one."
"Damn." He saw Hinata's pleading eyes. "Alright, I'll do it." Ichiro cocked his head questioningly.
"Um, if one of us is staying with Kiba, doesn't that mean we'll get caught anyway? His family also has a insanely good sense of smell." Kiba just blinked at him.
"Haven't you heard? I moved out last month. I live next door to Neji." Kiba pointed to one of Neji's walls. "My apartment is on his right. It was pretty much a coincidence. I didn't know he lived there till I bought the place." Kiba ran into Neji's kitchen and brought out one skewer. He broke it into half, then broke one of the halves further again, and took only the pointed pieces, now having one piece shorted than the other. "We'll use these skewer pieces to decide who's hasta babysit who..."
"We're not children!" Sakui and Ichiro cried at the same time.
"Ahem." Kiba glared at them "As I was saying...the short stick can be Ino's, 'cos her name is shorter..." Actually...I'm implying that her personality is narrow...Kiba grinned evilly as he thought that. It was obvious to all others that he was suggesting something else about Ino/Ichiro and the shorter stick. Ichiro whacked Kiba solidly at the back of his head, surprising him to the point that he dropped his skewer pieces. Hinata picked them up and turned around, positioning them in the closed fists to show only two pointed ends, both protruding from her hands in equal length.
"It's a good idea, Kiba-kun!" Hinata said as she turned around. "Now, will you and Neji-kun pick one please?" Both boys pulled out a stick each. Neji groaned, but laughed at Kiba's fate. Kiba swore karma was against him. This was all his fault for thinking evil thoughts.
"Goddamn, I got the shorter stick." Kiba peered angrily at Ichiro, who had this smug look of triumph across his face.
"The long one. Sakura, you'll be staying here. The flat which is in better condition, is neater, and also does not have animal fur everywhere."
"I take offence in that, woof." Akamaru barked at Neji. Sakui scratched his chin like a girl, pondering. Neji frowned.
"That's so feminine, Sakura."
"Shut up, I was just thinking, you shouldn't call us Sakura or Ino while we're in this form..." Sakui started. "It'll give us away."
"In fact, I guess it'll be better if you avoid saying our names as much as possible..." Ichiro continued "That will leave less room for errors. But still, no Sakura or Ino while we're like this."
"Glad we came to an agreement, Ichiro."
"We are best friends after all, Sakui." Both young men began to giggle uncontrollably like scary high school girls. Kiba almost cried.
"Will you please please PLEASE stop acting like girls? It's doing crap to my self-esteem!" he pleaded. Akamaru began to scratch himself, and fur went all over Neji's carpet. Neji groaned. Cleaning fur from carpet was not something he liked doing.
"Anyway...the most important thing is how to get you two back to normal. What are you two planning?"
"TO GET SASUKE, OF COURSE!" Sakui and Ichiro cried at the same time. Sparks flew between them in rage and jealousy. "NO, I AM! HE'S MINE!" They started bickering amongst themselves again. Neji's veins began to pulse. Not again...and to think they were saying they were best friends before this...
"I though he was going out with someone...anyway, Sakura, why don't you let Ino have Sasuke? I'm sure you can get Naruto or Lee to fall for you easy..." Kiba started, only to cower at Sakui's ferocious demonic facial expression. Thank god Neji has her...not me...
"LIKE HELL I WILL!"
"This is war." Ichiro announced. Sakui glared further.
"I'm getting Sasuke-kun."
"No way. I shall dub this 'Operation Get-Sasuke'! May the best boy win!" And they shook on it. Neji and Kiba stared blankly on, while Hinata smiled uneasily.
"I think it's time for me to go home, or Father will get angry...good luck, you two!" Then she mouthed "and lots of luck for you, Neji-kun, Kiba-kun..." where they replied with sighs of hopelessness. This will be a long quest. They were hoping the spell would be broken in a week...but as if that will happen. It's hard enough getting with a boy even if you are a girl...and Sasuke was not only straight, but currently with a girl. Life was not fair to Neji and Kiba. They might have to live those to horrors for the rest of their lives. They gulped. Death was not such a bad idea now...
To be continued...with chapter 3, duh...
AN: DONE! That was long...and slightly...er...startling. Oh well, intros can be long, but now we're going somewhere! More Kiba than Neji in this chapter, more so than the girl-guys too...but we'll have more of them in following chapters, they are the lead girl-guys anyway. Also, note how Kiba has a light crush on Hinata. Too lazy, cant be bothered proof reading. Expect another chapter soon...meanwhile, go write a review or read something else. Yes...like another one of my junk (or not). -disappears mysteriously into a mist-