Illyana stood peeking out of her room. The door was open just a crack and she could see down the hall and out on to the deck. Brian was talking with Betsy.
It hurts me to look at him. She thought. It hurts me that I like to look at him as well.
She shook her head. It's just like me to ruin something wonderful before it ever has a chance to start.
And then agonize over how badly I'd blown it.
Her face knotted up and she was close to tears. I don't know how long I can stay here before they find me out… Or I crack under the strain.
Maybe… She swallowed. Maybe I could… She began to shake. Could I… Tell him?
She began breathing heavily.
NO! I WILL NOT…
I need to … make … amends.
She sniffed and forced her head high.
Forgiveness… Is for the deserving.
Not for filth like me.
She looked at herself in the mirror. And still… you let yourself forget, don't you? You go dancing! You laugh with them!
BRIAN TOOK YOU FLYING! She told herself. AND YOU LOVED IT!
She shook all over, the image of herself looking back began to disgust her now.
The best thing… I could ever do… is die.
She turned away from the mirror and grabbed a towel from the top of her hamper to wipe her tears.
Just don't let on. She told herself. Just don't let on.
Kurt sat in his study, the small room at the end of the hall with the odd shaped bench and the low sitting table.
Kurt knew why the bench was odd and why the table sat low. But it was a secret.
If you promise not to tell, you can read on:
His 'study' was … a bathroom.
The odd shaped bench hid a toilet and the low sitting table covered a sink.
Originally it had been mistaken for a storage closet, but upon finally cleaning it completely out – Kurt had discovered the truth.
Working through the dead of night he disguised the room as best he could and then moved a bookcase in to finish the 'look' of the place.
While living at the mansion in Bayville Kurt had found himself totally envious of Charles Xavier. Not for Xavier's gifts, his fortune, his influence or his competence.
No.
Kurt envied his bathroom.
While Kurt was fighting any number of Jamies, let alone everyone else at the mansion, for a shot at the bathrooms in the morning – Xavier had a private bathroom just off his bedroom.
It was wonderfully ornate and frighteningly clean compared to the 'public' bathrooms everyone else shared.
It hadn't hit Kurt until he had hidden the bathroom, as he went to go to sleep, that he had actually thanked God, in his prayers – for that toilet.
He remembers thinking, right afterward: Ach, God must think I'm a twit! And then he paused before adding You know… I spent too much time with Alistaire. Who was the only person Kurt had ever heard use the word 'twit'.
It also occurred to him that Kitty could find that bathroom in a heartbeat. Lucy has probably already sniffed it out, Brian's too big to fit in the room so it's not an issue, Rachael is a powerful telepath, telekinetic and could more than likely discover the bathroom despite the disguise, Forge must have seen the pipes leading out the floor and probably already knows the truth… So, in fact, his greatest secret and indulgence… Is really only being kept from a handful of people; Betsy, Illyana, to some extent Alistaire (As he doesn't want to have to tell Alistaire that they've been having all their meetings in the bathroom) and…
Tabitha.
Kurt isn't sure of a lot of things in this world, but one thing he was more than aware of was this: Tabitha hogs the bathroom.
She did it at the mansion. She does it at the lighthouse and Kurt suspected that when she was put in solitary confinement in jail they probably didn't tell her and someone simply locked the bathroom door while she was in there.
Even with three or four people waiting she thinks almost nothing of spending forty-five minutes to an hour in the bathroom.
So she's not getting in to mine! Kurt decided, with a hesitant swallow. That and… It's been too long. If I tell her now… She'll kill me for holding out on her!
He shook his head. One way or another… I'm going to end up in trouble over this. The only question is… How long can I get away with it?
Then he laughed at himself… because some times he thinks he just isn't right in the head.
Wilson dozed on the couch. He had thought that it was like sleeping on a cloud as he lay down for the first time. It was, after all, far more comfortable than a park bench.
Somewhere inside, he was disappointed, because it wasn't going to happen this time and he knew it.
But at the same time… He loved this couch.
And so he snuggled in with a smile and snored – ever so softly.
Tabitha swung her head in to Kurt's 'study'. "What's up?" She smiled.
Kurt jumped a mile. "Oh, you scared me. Velcome back. How was Jimmy?"
She smiled sadly. "Not so good." She shrugged slowly.
Kurt pursed his lips. "It sounds like we need to talk."
She sighed. "Probably not. Jimmy put up a fuss. I wanted to try to sneak his daughter on to our insurance. I thought Alistaire could do that. But he wont do it. He's stubborn."
Kurt grimaced.
"I asked Forge to look in to it." She said. "I don't think he'd put up much of a fuss is we had an idea but he's totally against taking any kind of charity."
"I should explain the difference between charity and generosity to him." Kurt fumed.
"There's a difference?" Tabby asked.
Kurt nodded. "Charity implies giving what you can spare to someone who needs it. Generosity is about doing what you can when you can so that you can sleep at night." He swallowed and looked down at his hands. "Pride makes fools…" He said under his breath.
"Yeah. Bot only of Alistaire lately." Tabby smiled slightly and looked to see if she had made Kurt smile at all.
He shot her a small one just out of sympathy and looked back down at his desk.
"You know…" Tabby looked at his desk. "I always thought that ws weird, having a mirror right in front of a desk like that. It's weird."
Kurt's perimiter alarms went off. Hurry… HURRY!
"Hey, are you hungry?" Kurt asked. "I haven't eaten in forever."
He began to usher her out of the room.
"Sure… I guess… I could… eat." He had successfully managed to get her out of the room but… for just an instant, she peered back inside curiously.
They hadn't gone more than a few steps when they stopped.
"Whose on the couch?" Kurt asked.
Tabby looked at him in disbelief. "I passed him on the way in… You don't know?"
Kurt shook his head.
Just then Illyana slipped out of her room with a smile. "Welcome back Tabitha."
"Thanks!" Tabby hugged her and she hugged back slightly.
"Who is on the couch?" Illyana asked.
Kurt shrugged. "Ve don't know. Just found him."
"I am… trying … to sleep." Wilson said softly as he began to wake up.
"Ach. Sorry." Kurt jumped with a smile towards the kitchen, pulling Tabby with him.
Illyana giggled and followed them, whispering "Sorry."
"Go back to sleep." Kurt told him, vanishing in to the kitchen.
Wilson looked after him for long moment. "No… uh… problem?"
And he rolled over slightly and closed his eyes. He thought he would be awake for a long moment reflecting on that conversation, but beyond thinking that Kurt was smaller in person than on TV, he was wrong.
And he snored softly once again.
"Vhat is he doing here?" Tabby whispered at Kurt in the kitchen.
Kurt smiled. "If he's sleeping now, what ever he wants will probably keep."
And with that he pulled a plate out of the cabinet and opened the fridge.