Part 8
Magnificent in its silence, the pocket plane was a welcome refuge from the slaughter that surrounded Saradush. It was rather amusing that part of the abyss had become her sanctuary when for most it was a place of endless torment. Avress, however, wasn't alone in her relief. The creeping destruction of Saradush had affected all of them more than they had realized. Creases of tension and discomfort fairly melted off her companions' faces.
Avress moved further in, once she found her bearings. Cespenar happily flapped towards her and gratefully accepted her hushed orders. The strange imp seemed pleased to finally have something to do. He quickly returned and with short bursts of magic, steaming dishes of food appeared. Her companions fell upon the food uncaring of the other objects the imp materialized. Further off in the circular main room, a rickety privacy screen stood in all its dilapidated glory. It looked as if it belonged in a Sembian bordello.
Further investigation showed that a large tin bathtub stood behind it and Avress was pleased with the cover the screen afforded. Privacy wasn't what absorbed her once she spotted the tub. Steam coiled up from the clear water in inviting sways. It called to her wordlessly. Before the others could protest, Avress stripped behind the screen and submerged herself.
Water covered her to the chest when she sat back against the lip of the tub. With eager hands, Avress scrubbed her bare skin with the round sponge the imp had provided. Blood, soot and dust soon dispersed in the liquid. A small cantrip later and the water was enchanted to remain hot and clear itself as it was sullied. Rummaging through her pack with one hand to find her bar of scented elven soap, Avress pointedly ignored the half-heard conversation taking place several feet away. There was more than enough time for conversation once she left the tub.
Once clean, she let her body soak in the hot water. She was dragging her heels and she knew it. Avress knew that Jaheira would question her sooner rather than later. Retreating into the bath was only a temporary solution. It was a respite that Avress hoped would let her gain some idea of how to proceed. In response to her emotional turmoil, the taint sloshed agitatedly inside of her. Avress sighed and closed her eyes. Carefully she drew her focus inward. Promises sugared with the sweetness of decay swirled through her awareness. The iron strength of the taint wound about her in a seductive embrace. Avress let it do as it pleased but turned a deaf ear to its pleas and coaxing. It was like familiar background noise in some ways. Not that she could trust it to remain so. Certain that nothing had changed during the battle with Gromnir, Avress left the tub and dried off. She was cleaner but, regretfully, none the wiser.
Her second set of robes and her equipment settled about her like a comfortable second skin. Sliding in the wooden skewers that kept her hair tied back, Avress braced herself as she stepped from the safety of the screen. Internally, she scolded herself for her reluctance. She'd attacked full grown dragons with fewer reserves than this! Avress found herself oddly disappointed that her party barely looked up from the meal they were consuming. Jaheira simply stood to take her turn at the tub. The confrontation she was expecting was strangely absent and she felt a little foolish.
"Will there be a watch while we rest?" Keldorn asked.
"There doesn't seem to be anything here but Cespenar," Avress finally spoke, having expected something far different from the paladin than a simple question about sleeping arrangements. "The sealed doorways seem too strongly warded for something to break out. It should be safe."
"I cannot say I know what to expect from this place. I will rely on your judgment," Keldorn replied with regret.
"Minsc does not like the doorways. They make Boo's nose twitch but Avress is a witch and knows witchy things. Besides, Boo says he needs his beauty sleep!" Minsc interjected gravely.
"Then we will let him rest," Avress replied with a smile.
The group fell silent once again. Avress took the opportunity to eat some of the food the imp had provided. After the limited fair offered in Saradush it was much appreciated. Pangs of guilt threatened to bombard her as she ate but Avress pushed them aside. The best thing she could do for the beleaguered city was to find a way to destroy Yaga-Shura. Existing on substandard food would not matter one way or the other. Just as she finished a bowl of rice pudding, Jaheira reappeared dressed in clean clothes. Minsc took her place.
"Are you ready to talk, child, or will you have your imp summon up another distraction?" Jaheira asked tartly.
"You seem to have enjoyed my distraction," Avress retorted.
"Waste not, want not," Jaheira snapped. "Besides, civilized conversation calls for civilized attire. Covered in bloody armor is not the way to begin this conversation."
"Then perhaps we should wait for the others," Avress suggested with an overly sweet smile.
"Very well," Jaheira replied reluctantly.
It did not take overly long for the party to clean themselves. With Jaheira glaring daggers at them, Avress did not think they dared linger in the unexpected luxury of the soothing water. Cespenar had appeared once again to clear away the remains of their meal and take away their armor and robes for cleaning. Avress had not refused the imp's offer, as the group was to tense to bother about such things for the moment.
"Bah, stop glaring and get on with it!" Viconia growled. "This pointless posturing is not only foolish but it is boring."
"Enough, drow! My concern is no small thing!" Jaheira barked.
"No it isn't and you're tearing this group apart with it!" Viconia sneered.
"I am looking after the best interests of my charge."
"And what are my best interests?" Avress asked softly. "If I continued as I was... the consequences would have killed us all."
"So you decided to let the taint run wild within you? How is this supposed to be a better solution?" Jaheira prompted with scorn.
"Keldorn has already said that I'm fine. It was the only option. I was becoming a volcano ready to erupt. The taint had to go somewhere!"
"I dislike what you have done, Avress. There has to be another solution! Just look at how it has influenced you already," Jaheira argued.
"Influence me? *How* has it influenced me?"
"Are you kidding me!" Imoen piped up. "Ever since you called us you've been acting funny. Sarevok was bad enough but now the taint and then the Slayer!"
"I did what I had to! Would you have preferred that the vampire had killed me?" Avress snarled.
"Sometimes I don't think I know you at all," Imoen reproached. "Y-you're so ruthless."
"I've always been ruthless, Imoen. That is how I survived Gorion's death and it's how I saved you from Irenicus. Complaining after so long seems a little foolish."
Imoen flinched back and Avress felt a rush of shame. It was not the venom that had filled her voice that had her sister flinching. It was the truth. Avress felt angry with herself. Those were things she'd never wanted to tell Imoen in that way. As the honorary older sister she had always tried to protect Imoen as much as she could. The lengths she had gone to had left its mark. She had shouldered the responsibility for avenging Gorion. Then Avress had nearly torn apart Atkathla to save Imoen and then eliminate Irenicus' threat. In doing those things she had lost the perfect optimism and naivety she'd had at Candlekeep. For all her trials, and resulting emotional fragility, Imoen had never truly lost that.
"Is that how Gorion, or I, raised you?" Jaheira spoke aghast.
"No, it isn't," Avress replied her throat closing up. "I've had to become ruthless. The choices I've faced have not been easy. Sometimes it is a case of choosing the lesser evil."
"That is how you see the taint?" Keldorn asked gently.
"The taint is evil but I cannot pretend that it does not exist. To survive, to prevent worse evil, I had to accept it."
"Perhaps I have let you take too much responsibility, far too soon. It is easy to forget that you are as young as you are. Your choices in the past were right, child. I trust you but I do not trust the taint," Jaheira replied.
"Then we are arguing in circles!" Avress said, her voice wreathed in frustration.
"I still say there is another solution," Jaheira stubbornly replied.
"The taint does not give you time to find other solutions," Sarevok spoke for the first time. "Your charge probably saved your pitiful life."
"And you think I would believe anything you say!" Jaheira snarled.
"Then ask the other one," Sarevok challenged glancing towards Imoen.
"What?! Me!" Imoen asked uncomfortably.
"I heard what you told Avress about the taint rising in you. Even if I hadn't, I can feel it inching its way through you. Tell the druid, mageling," Sarevok spoke with contempt.
"Is this true, Imoen?" Jaheira asked.
"I-It's not that bad! I swear! It's just dreams... and a few spells," Imoen said softly. "I can't help it. It just comes."
"That is the nature of Bhaal's taint," Sarevok gloated. "Either ignore it at your peril or accept the inevitable."
"I will not have Avress think embracing evil as inevitable!" Jaheira cried angrily.
"Fool! She had forged her own path and you cannot even see it!" Sarevok growled.
Suddenly, Avress was glad she had given Cespenar the group's armor and weapons. Sarevok looked like a thunder cloud- a large, looming thunder cloud ready to explode. White faced and tense, Jaheira refused to back down. Rubbing her face wearily, Avress stood up between the two. Her movement drew their eyes and she glared at the both of them. So much for civilized conversation, Avress thought to herself. The argument about her taint was verging on the ridiculous.
"Violence will get us nowhere," Keldorn broke in. "If we cannot agree, what compromise can we come to? What will make you content?"
"I would be happy if Avress renounced the taint! Accepting it in any form will lead to catastrophe... but what is done is done," Jaheira retorted and then turned to Avress. "I doubt you could begin to reverse what you have done! It is my opinion that you made a foolish and reckless decision. I will keep my peace if you agree to several changes. The first is letting Keldorn monitor you and the second is letting me guide your future decisions."
Avress was not pleased at the thought of having her every action second guessed or the privacy of her soul regularly invaded. Clenching her jaw, she glared at the druid. Jaheira knew very well that she would not like those suggestions. Was it some kind of test? If she refused, she could shatter relations with her guardian forever. Avress knew Jaheira was not the forgiving sort. If she accepted, she would have to endure Jaheira and Keldorn's continued observation. Her words on choosing the lesser evil seemed to echo mockingly in her ears.
"I can accept that," Avress replied tersely and nodded at the paladin. "What else do you want?"
"I must also demand that Sarevok leave the party. His presence is causing disruption and I do not trust what he whispers in your ear," Jaheira continued.
Tension exploded and she shot to her feet. Her friend had pushed her too far. Jaheira rose and stood in front of her. The mule stubbornness she was feeling spilled onto her face. Avress knew that her temper was flaring dangerously but she refused to back down, especially when she'd already spoken to the druid about Sarevok's presence.
"No. I have already spoken with you about this!" Avress argued.
"We spoke but you did not listen to what I said. His heart is black and he makes no attempt to pretend otherwise. That is not the kind of influence you need now," Jaheira stubbornly retorted.
"Yet you have no qualms about Viconia traveling with us and she is a priestess of Shar," Avress replied derisively.
"She has never risen against us and she has earned some measure of my trust. Besides, the drow does not seem to have as great a hold on you as that abomination!" Jaheria passionately argued.
"That is a matter of history!"
"Then you should have left him dead!" Imoen cried out. "You can't pretend that you've listened to *him* more than you have Jaheira or me!"
"That is not true!" Avress retorted with fire and then glared at her sister. "I love you like the mother I never had Jaheira but children don't always take the advice of their parents. To survive, I must know more about the taint. If I can learn from Sarevok, then I will."
"I find your distrust of me amusing, druid. Do you think I would move to exact revenge?" Sarevok spoke before Jaheira could. "I see a far better prospect in letting Avress triumph. The taint controlled me and I take no small pleasure in seeing her do the reverse. The time of destiny is at hand. Who knows what it shall bring?"
The unholy glee in Sarevok's eyes made Avress shudder slightly. It was eerily familiar to the look he had given her as they had clashed for the final time. Again he was willing to risk it all with one roll of the dice. This time he was gambling on her success rather than failure but in ways that was only worse. For a moment Avress wondered what Sarevok's vision of the future was. Her own plans were stunted and flimsy things. Mostly, she did not dare to dream of a future when the present was so uncertain.
"Bah! I will still sleep with my weapons close!" Jaheira growled.
"I will agree to your first demands but Sarevok stays," Avress spoke up.
"Will you accept the agreement even with Avress' refusal of the final term?" Keldorn asked. "I feel I should remind you of our earlier conversation on this particular matter."
"You are all making a mistake in thinking he will not stab us in the back at the earliest opportunity," Jaheira huffed but did not protest further. "We have an agreement."
On the sidelines, Imoen watched the druid agree but she was strangely silent.