A/N: What is going on I wonder? On with the story!
~*~
Dear diary,
I do not even know why I am doing this. I hate diaries. They are a liability. How could you tell all your deepest darkest secrets to a book? What if someone steals your diary? What is someone hexes your diary? What if the diary is alive?? Huh? Writing in a diary is stupid and for weaklings. I am not writing a diary. I am uh... expressing my thoughts. I usually do not have to resort to such means but I HAVE to tell SOMEONE. Venom cannot understand, but I'd rather DIE first than tell a living soul what happened that past night in the One Broomstick! Gah! Curse Godric and his flimsy plans!!! That wizard could not devise a cunning plan even if his HAT depended on it! It was a plan doomed to failure! It was an idiotic plan! It was a half-baked plan. It was a most beautiful plan and I spoiled my chance!!! Arghhhh!!!! Rowena!!! Dearest light of my heart! Song of my soul! Why could I not tell you those things face to face?! Hex it!!! Why is it that my tongue always freezes when I am near you??? I froze! HEX ALL MUGGLES AND TURN THEM INTO TOADS, I FROZE!!! There you were, sitting pleadingly and longingly before me and I could not move my jaws to speak, move my limbs to comfort you, move my hand to swat Godric in the face for enticing you to such a foolish game! I saw the sorrow in your eyes; did you think I did not feel the same?!? Why oh why did you take that drink? The maroon fool had no idea what he was rambling about by then! And he was flashing me the most oddest of glances. Strange, strange wizard!
Gah! But only if the tale ended there!!! If it had ended there than my shame would not be so overwhelming that I must act like a ten year old and gush my feelings into a book. It did not end there. For finally my mind began to click - and a magnificent plan I contrived! Rowena fell like a rock after her first swing and I succeeded in catching her. She leaned into my shoulder and I could inhale the glorious scent of her hair - like lavender and owls - wait I do not like owls, they keep on trying to eat my snakes. But I digress. For then she looked up at me and I was lost in her shimmering eyes of azure. Then, quite suddenly she threw her arms about my neck and whispered my name with such desire that it still sends chills down my spine. So lost in the momentum of emotion that I did not stop to think but immediately apparated us both back to her chamber. Not that I had anything planned... of course I did not! I would never take advantage over Rowena in that kind of sta-But why am I arguing with myself??! This is stupid! I knew writing in diaries made you think funny! Agh! So anyway, I tired to lay her back on her bed but she kept clinging to me; begging me to 'ravish her senseless'. Alright, I must admit by then my will was very, very, very, very, very close to breaking point and I WOULD have ravished her senseless if IT NOT HAD BEEN FOR THAT BLOODY GODRIC GRABBING AT MY LEG!!!!! MAROON FOOL!!!! He would not let go! No matter how hard I tried to kick him off. He kept ranting about 'my love' and 'my emerald lady' or some nonsense like that!!! It was hideous! It was the most embarrassing day of my life! Had that Godric actually mistaken my LEG for a LADY!?!? Does his foolishness know no bounds?? Hex it Godric!! Did you know that by the time I finally got you off Rowena was sound asleep?!? You ruined my blasted chance! You disgraced my leg! You - You - snap it! I can't think straight anymore! And where was Helga in all of THIS???
Salazar S.
~*~
Dear diary,
Where was I in all of this?? SOMETHING happened in the One Broomstick but I do not know what it was!!! Rowena attacked me today demanding to know if I took her back to her room! I do not remember doing such a thing! When I told her that, she howled and ran away. And if that was not enough Godric popped by later, also demanding if I had seen an emerald clad girl in the One Broomstick! I hadn't and Godric seemed *very* upset by that!! Emerald girl??? The only one I remember who wore emerald was Slytherin - but then again his color is more of a forest green than emerald! Speaking of Slytherin, he stormed by me later that day and gave me this really scary stare! He was muttering something about lost opportunities and he was acting like SOMETHING happened in the One Broomstick. Did SOMETHING happen?? What's going on??? No one EVER tells me anything!! Is there something wrong with my eyesight? My memory? All I remember was that we were all sitting happily at our table - Godric was drinking like a fish and kept on smiling at Slytherin, Rowena joined him later while Slytherin just sat there. Then Rowena passed out, Godric fumbled to the floor and Slytherin apparated them all away - my guess was back to Hogwarts which was correct. So what did I miss??? Damn it!
Helga
~*~
Dear Salazar,
Salazar! I think I am in love! Yes, me. Do not laugh or I'll tell Rowena that you hate owls. I am serious! She is everywhere to me! And when I close my eyes, it is her I see!!
Godric
~*~
To Godric,
*snicker* So the mighty valiant Godric Gryffindor has fallen to the charms of a maiden! Hah! Who is the fumbling, blushing wizard now?? Hmm?
Salazar Slytherin
~*~
Salazar,
Be silent you! This is no laughing matter. I need to find her again Salazar! I must! I know you well enough that you'd be too damn cunning to get drunk! So you would have been the only one sober! I met this girl at the One Broomstick, but I cannot remember it much. Helga was completely hopeless so I must turn to you! Do you remember her?? I must find her again!!!
Godric
~*~
To Godric,
Calm down will you? Honestly. Allright, who is this extraordinary maiden who has enraptured your heart? You say you met her at the One Broomstick?
Salazar
~*~
Dear Salazar,
Yes, yes, at the One Broomstick. She has hair of ebony and eyes of emeralds!
Godric
~*~
To Godric,
I saw a lot of dark haired women there but I can't say I passionately stared into all of their eyes to find out the colour. Need to be more specific.
Salazar
~*~
Dear Salazar,
Well, it is all very vague and blurry, but I think she wore the robes of emerald - kind of like you. Hair of the night and eyes like freshly pickled toad!
Godric
~*~
//There is a long pause before the next letter arrives\\
Freshly pickled toad... you say? Um, just as a wild guess: did this maiden have long, straight, shoulder length hair? Like mine? Eh, also, did you refer to her as your 'Emerald Lady'?
Salazar
~*~
Salazar! Indeed I did!!! SO you have SEEN her then??! Have you? Do you know who she is?? Do you know where she comes from?? WELL???
~*~
Godric. Forget about her. Immediately.
S.S
~*~
To Salazar,
What are you saying?! What are you HIDING?! Damn it serpent-tongue do not jest with me on this matter! WHO IS SHE??? ANSWER ME!
Godric Gryffindor
~*~
NO ONE!!! Curse it Gryffindor I am your friend! Trust me that you do NOT want to know! Forget about her! Please.
~*~
Friends do not keep secrets Slytherin. Rowena will be most displeased to hear that you hate her beloved owls.
~*~
Y-You wouldn't DARE Gryffindor!! YOU WOULDN'T!!!!!
~*~
Fair Rowena,
SALAZAR SLYTHERIN AKA SLIMY SERPENT TONGUE HATES OWLS!!!!!!
Love,
Godric
~*~
Dear Salazar,
How can you hate such a beautiful creature??? Is your heart made of rock?? I see I misjudged you. Owls are graceful creatures of the air and you would have to be an ignorant bastard not to love them!!
Rowena
~*~
To Master Hufflepuff,
Master Slytherin and Master Gryffindor are fighting again! IT'S SO COOL!!! YOU HAVE JUST GOT TO COME DOWN AND SEE IT!!! When I grow up, I want to be just like Master Gryffindor! So brave and valiant! Either that - or Master Slytherin - then I can blast people into oblivion!!!
Nimbus
~*~
My dear friend Rowena,
Those two MEN are at it again. I honestly wonder what they fight about. When will they ever learn?? Godric has no tack, Slytherin has no patience. And the both of them put together have no sense! I need some heavy duty healing spells Rowena! I cannot think of any at the top of my head. Godric and Slytherin are currently profuse apologizing to each other - I gave them a good dose of Get-In-Touch-With-Your-Emotions-N-Sensitive-Side spell. I know they'll hate me when it wears off but it is always so CUTE to see them all soft and gentle! Oh look they are starting to cry over an ant that accidentally got squashed during their duel!! How sweet!!!
Helga
~*~
Dear diary,
Well, I just got back from patching up Godric and Slytherin. Godric was helped back to his tower by Nimbus, who felt that the duel was the most 'exciting' thing in his life (honestly, that wizard is having a BAD impact on that boy) while Rowena was quite insistent that *she* help Slytherin back. Godric kept trying to wink at Slytherin for some strange reason and both Rowena and Slytherin suddenly looked very red. I hope it isn't because they are coming down with some illness! Maybe I need to change the heating of the castle... oh dear. SOMETHING is going on between those three, but I fail to grasp what! I still do not understand why Godric wrote Slytherin and Rowena's name in capital letters! Is there SOMETHING going on?? Darn it! No one tells me anything! I have to find out! Drastic needs call for drastic measures! We are having Smoking Red Mons today; it is very heavy on spices and masks almost all scents! Then I am going to slip some Truth drops inside and once and for all find out what the heck is going on! Hah! Let us see that Slytherin try to notice my truth drops THIS time. If at once you do not succeed; try and try and try and try and try and TRY again! Attempt No. 265 shall now commence!
So sayeth Helga!
~*~
To all my friends, Dinner is ready. We are having Smoking Red Mons today! Yum! The children are already waiting so please hurry.
Helga
~*~
Dear father,
How are the Welsh Greenies? I hope you can handle them fine without me. I am learning many new things under the tutelage of Master Gryffindor and company. They are most excellent teachers and my magical abilities have almost increased ten fold! I am still working on creating faster broomsticks. Yes I know it is foolish, why would people want fast broomsticks if they can teleport and so on. But that is my dream and Master Slytherin once told me that it is actually very important to have dreams and ambitions - he says it prevents you from becoming complacent. Anyway, Hogwarts it the most fantastic place ever! There is this really dangerous forest nearby and Master Gryffindor once brought us inside to find Flammy Worms! We were sworn to secrecy because if Master Hufflepuff found out she'd do nasty things to us. But for some strange reason I MUST tell you father. I must tell you everything. I have abandoned my meal just to tell you this. Everyone is still in the Dining Hall I think. When last I left, a most peculiar event was happening. Half-way through our meal, Master Ravenclaw abruptly stood up and declared her undying love to Master Slytherin. Diagon was about to say 'Aww' when Master Slytherin leapt from his chair and yelled something about being an 'Emerald Lady'. I don't know. All I know is that Master Gryffindor had this most appalled look on his face but he simply cried out about being afraid of geese! And Master Hufflepuff was shouting: I don't get it and suddenly Morgana grabbed Evan and kissed him and then Diagon yelled that she had a crush on Master Slytherin and Quinton abruptly said that he hadn't finished reading next week's chapters and Lupin told everyone that she wanted to bite us all in our sleep and... and... I know I have not written for some time but there is something I must confess: I CHEATED ON MY REPORT CARD!!!! IT WAS A 39% NOT 59%!!!!!!!
Your son, Nimbus
~*~
YA! Please review! Click the button down there:
~*~
Dear diary,
I do not even know why I am doing this. I hate diaries. They are a liability. How could you tell all your deepest darkest secrets to a book? What if someone steals your diary? What is someone hexes your diary? What if the diary is alive?? Huh? Writing in a diary is stupid and for weaklings. I am not writing a diary. I am uh... expressing my thoughts. I usually do not have to resort to such means but I HAVE to tell SOMEONE. Venom cannot understand, but I'd rather DIE first than tell a living soul what happened that past night in the One Broomstick! Gah! Curse Godric and his flimsy plans!!! That wizard could not devise a cunning plan even if his HAT depended on it! It was a plan doomed to failure! It was an idiotic plan! It was a half-baked plan. It was a most beautiful plan and I spoiled my chance!!! Arghhhh!!!! Rowena!!! Dearest light of my heart! Song of my soul! Why could I not tell you those things face to face?! Hex it!!! Why is it that my tongue always freezes when I am near you??? I froze! HEX ALL MUGGLES AND TURN THEM INTO TOADS, I FROZE!!! There you were, sitting pleadingly and longingly before me and I could not move my jaws to speak, move my limbs to comfort you, move my hand to swat Godric in the face for enticing you to such a foolish game! I saw the sorrow in your eyes; did you think I did not feel the same?!? Why oh why did you take that drink? The maroon fool had no idea what he was rambling about by then! And he was flashing me the most oddest of glances. Strange, strange wizard!
Gah! But only if the tale ended there!!! If it had ended there than my shame would not be so overwhelming that I must act like a ten year old and gush my feelings into a book. It did not end there. For finally my mind began to click - and a magnificent plan I contrived! Rowena fell like a rock after her first swing and I succeeded in catching her. She leaned into my shoulder and I could inhale the glorious scent of her hair - like lavender and owls - wait I do not like owls, they keep on trying to eat my snakes. But I digress. For then she looked up at me and I was lost in her shimmering eyes of azure. Then, quite suddenly she threw her arms about my neck and whispered my name with such desire that it still sends chills down my spine. So lost in the momentum of emotion that I did not stop to think but immediately apparated us both back to her chamber. Not that I had anything planned... of course I did not! I would never take advantage over Rowena in that kind of sta-But why am I arguing with myself??! This is stupid! I knew writing in diaries made you think funny! Agh! So anyway, I tired to lay her back on her bed but she kept clinging to me; begging me to 'ravish her senseless'. Alright, I must admit by then my will was very, very, very, very, very close to breaking point and I WOULD have ravished her senseless if IT NOT HAD BEEN FOR THAT BLOODY GODRIC GRABBING AT MY LEG!!!!! MAROON FOOL!!!! He would not let go! No matter how hard I tried to kick him off. He kept ranting about 'my love' and 'my emerald lady' or some nonsense like that!!! It was hideous! It was the most embarrassing day of my life! Had that Godric actually mistaken my LEG for a LADY!?!? Does his foolishness know no bounds?? Hex it Godric!! Did you know that by the time I finally got you off Rowena was sound asleep?!? You ruined my blasted chance! You disgraced my leg! You - You - snap it! I can't think straight anymore! And where was Helga in all of THIS???
Salazar S.
~*~
Dear diary,
Where was I in all of this?? SOMETHING happened in the One Broomstick but I do not know what it was!!! Rowena attacked me today demanding to know if I took her back to her room! I do not remember doing such a thing! When I told her that, she howled and ran away. And if that was not enough Godric popped by later, also demanding if I had seen an emerald clad girl in the One Broomstick! I hadn't and Godric seemed *very* upset by that!! Emerald girl??? The only one I remember who wore emerald was Slytherin - but then again his color is more of a forest green than emerald! Speaking of Slytherin, he stormed by me later that day and gave me this really scary stare! He was muttering something about lost opportunities and he was acting like SOMETHING happened in the One Broomstick. Did SOMETHING happen?? What's going on??? No one EVER tells me anything!! Is there something wrong with my eyesight? My memory? All I remember was that we were all sitting happily at our table - Godric was drinking like a fish and kept on smiling at Slytherin, Rowena joined him later while Slytherin just sat there. Then Rowena passed out, Godric fumbled to the floor and Slytherin apparated them all away - my guess was back to Hogwarts which was correct. So what did I miss??? Damn it!
Helga
~*~
Dear Salazar,
Salazar! I think I am in love! Yes, me. Do not laugh or I'll tell Rowena that you hate owls. I am serious! She is everywhere to me! And when I close my eyes, it is her I see!!
Godric
~*~
To Godric,
*snicker* So the mighty valiant Godric Gryffindor has fallen to the charms of a maiden! Hah! Who is the fumbling, blushing wizard now?? Hmm?
Salazar Slytherin
~*~
Salazar,
Be silent you! This is no laughing matter. I need to find her again Salazar! I must! I know you well enough that you'd be too damn cunning to get drunk! So you would have been the only one sober! I met this girl at the One Broomstick, but I cannot remember it much. Helga was completely hopeless so I must turn to you! Do you remember her?? I must find her again!!!
Godric
~*~
To Godric,
Calm down will you? Honestly. Allright, who is this extraordinary maiden who has enraptured your heart? You say you met her at the One Broomstick?
Salazar
~*~
Dear Salazar,
Yes, yes, at the One Broomstick. She has hair of ebony and eyes of emeralds!
Godric
~*~
To Godric,
I saw a lot of dark haired women there but I can't say I passionately stared into all of their eyes to find out the colour. Need to be more specific.
Salazar
~*~
Dear Salazar,
Well, it is all very vague and blurry, but I think she wore the robes of emerald - kind of like you. Hair of the night and eyes like freshly pickled toad!
Godric
~*~
//There is a long pause before the next letter arrives\\
Freshly pickled toad... you say? Um, just as a wild guess: did this maiden have long, straight, shoulder length hair? Like mine? Eh, also, did you refer to her as your 'Emerald Lady'?
Salazar
~*~
Salazar! Indeed I did!!! SO you have SEEN her then??! Have you? Do you know who she is?? Do you know where she comes from?? WELL???
~*~
Godric. Forget about her. Immediately.
S.S
~*~
To Salazar,
What are you saying?! What are you HIDING?! Damn it serpent-tongue do not jest with me on this matter! WHO IS SHE??? ANSWER ME!
Godric Gryffindor
~*~
NO ONE!!! Curse it Gryffindor I am your friend! Trust me that you do NOT want to know! Forget about her! Please.
~*~
Friends do not keep secrets Slytherin. Rowena will be most displeased to hear that you hate her beloved owls.
~*~
Y-You wouldn't DARE Gryffindor!! YOU WOULDN'T!!!!!
~*~
Fair Rowena,
SALAZAR SLYTHERIN AKA SLIMY SERPENT TONGUE HATES OWLS!!!!!!
Love,
Godric
~*~
Dear Salazar,
How can you hate such a beautiful creature??? Is your heart made of rock?? I see I misjudged you. Owls are graceful creatures of the air and you would have to be an ignorant bastard not to love them!!
Rowena
~*~
To Master Hufflepuff,
Master Slytherin and Master Gryffindor are fighting again! IT'S SO COOL!!! YOU HAVE JUST GOT TO COME DOWN AND SEE IT!!! When I grow up, I want to be just like Master Gryffindor! So brave and valiant! Either that - or Master Slytherin - then I can blast people into oblivion!!!
Nimbus
~*~
My dear friend Rowena,
Those two MEN are at it again. I honestly wonder what they fight about. When will they ever learn?? Godric has no tack, Slytherin has no patience. And the both of them put together have no sense! I need some heavy duty healing spells Rowena! I cannot think of any at the top of my head. Godric and Slytherin are currently profuse apologizing to each other - I gave them a good dose of Get-In-Touch-With-Your-Emotions-N-Sensitive-Side spell. I know they'll hate me when it wears off but it is always so CUTE to see them all soft and gentle! Oh look they are starting to cry over an ant that accidentally got squashed during their duel!! How sweet!!!
Helga
~*~
Dear diary,
Well, I just got back from patching up Godric and Slytherin. Godric was helped back to his tower by Nimbus, who felt that the duel was the most 'exciting' thing in his life (honestly, that wizard is having a BAD impact on that boy) while Rowena was quite insistent that *she* help Slytherin back. Godric kept trying to wink at Slytherin for some strange reason and both Rowena and Slytherin suddenly looked very red. I hope it isn't because they are coming down with some illness! Maybe I need to change the heating of the castle... oh dear. SOMETHING is going on between those three, but I fail to grasp what! I still do not understand why Godric wrote Slytherin and Rowena's name in capital letters! Is there SOMETHING going on?? Darn it! No one tells me anything! I have to find out! Drastic needs call for drastic measures! We are having Smoking Red Mons today; it is very heavy on spices and masks almost all scents! Then I am going to slip some Truth drops inside and once and for all find out what the heck is going on! Hah! Let us see that Slytherin try to notice my truth drops THIS time. If at once you do not succeed; try and try and try and try and try and TRY again! Attempt No. 265 shall now commence!
So sayeth Helga!
~*~
To all my friends, Dinner is ready. We are having Smoking Red Mons today! Yum! The children are already waiting so please hurry.
Helga
~*~
Dear father,
How are the Welsh Greenies? I hope you can handle them fine without me. I am learning many new things under the tutelage of Master Gryffindor and company. They are most excellent teachers and my magical abilities have almost increased ten fold! I am still working on creating faster broomsticks. Yes I know it is foolish, why would people want fast broomsticks if they can teleport and so on. But that is my dream and Master Slytherin once told me that it is actually very important to have dreams and ambitions - he says it prevents you from becoming complacent. Anyway, Hogwarts it the most fantastic place ever! There is this really dangerous forest nearby and Master Gryffindor once brought us inside to find Flammy Worms! We were sworn to secrecy because if Master Hufflepuff found out she'd do nasty things to us. But for some strange reason I MUST tell you father. I must tell you everything. I have abandoned my meal just to tell you this. Everyone is still in the Dining Hall I think. When last I left, a most peculiar event was happening. Half-way through our meal, Master Ravenclaw abruptly stood up and declared her undying love to Master Slytherin. Diagon was about to say 'Aww' when Master Slytherin leapt from his chair and yelled something about being an 'Emerald Lady'. I don't know. All I know is that Master Gryffindor had this most appalled look on his face but he simply cried out about being afraid of geese! And Master Hufflepuff was shouting: I don't get it and suddenly Morgana grabbed Evan and kissed him and then Diagon yelled that she had a crush on Master Slytherin and Quinton abruptly said that he hadn't finished reading next week's chapters and Lupin told everyone that she wanted to bite us all in our sleep and... and... I know I have not written for some time but there is something I must confess: I CHEATED ON MY REPORT CARD!!!! IT WAS A 39% NOT 59%!!!!!!!
Your son, Nimbus
~*~
YA! Please review! Click the button down there: