Chapter Forty-Two

Emma watched as Horatio prepared himself to face Simpson. His head was bent to his task at the small wooden desk by his window, and he was silent as he prepared his guns. Emma fought against the urge to tie him to the chair. She knew there would be no point. There would simply be another time, another duel and Emma would have to face this sickening dread all over again.

All she could do was sit on his bed, arms folded in her lap, fingers clenched tight and pray to a God that had already given her the greatest gift-her husband was back with her. Was it too much to ask now that he stayed that way?

She saw Horatio's fingers trembling as he tried to slip a round bullet into the gun's chamber; it fell from his fingers onto the desk with a tiny clink that popped in the oppressive silence of the room.

"Damn." He whispered and lifted the bullet again. Emma rose from the bed and walked towards him. It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him to forget this madness. It wasn't too late to back down.

Instead, she pressed her hand against his back and closed her eyes. Her mouth formed the words before she knew she intended to speak the declaration.

"I love you."

Horatio lifted his head and straightened in surprise. He turned to face her. His expression was one of startled hope. "What?"

"I love you, Horatio." Emma repeated carefully, her cheeks flaming. "I only wanted you to know that." She added shyly.

"Oh. I...well...oh." He stammered, his face colouring as well. He cleared his throat and placed a hand on her shoulder.

Emma thought she would buckle beneath the weight of his hand, considering how badly her knees were shaking.

"And I you." He admitted, leaning to kiss her forehead.

Emma threw her arms around him and held Horatio close, feeling the reassuring beat of his heart.

"I'm so afraid." She whispered, her voice choked.

"No matter what happens, no harm will come to you. I promise." Horatio assured her.

"I'm not afraid for me as much as I am for you." Emma admitted, raising her mouth to his cheek.

Horatio's arms came around her and held her tightly against him. She breathed in his warm, salty scent and felt her pulse begin to quicken. "Horatio..." She said looking up into his eyes and saw the desire there, the question.

His mouth met hers slowly when she didn't protest. Emma let herself given in for a little while, accepting the slide of his tongue against hers and his fingers in her hair. When she felt the back of her legs against the mattress she realized his intention. Part of her wanted to agree, wanted to finally consummate their marriage while they had the chance. Horatio pushed her down so she was sitting on the bed, and his hands were sliding along her arms up to caress her neck. Her body was humming, ready, wanting and yet she was still afraid. If he were to die today, would it be easier to bear not knowing the certain sweetness of what would be his body joined to hers? Was it not safer to keep herself separate from him in the only way she knew? How much worse would it be for her?

Yet she was holding him closer, following his lead as he began to slowly undo the buttons of her blouse. She undid the tie in his hair, letting his curls fall into her fingers. Emma sighed into his mouth when Horatio's hand slid beneath the fabric of her blouse to cover a breast through her shift. Her hands caressed his face, tenderly, slowly as she pulled him backwards with her so that his body was half on top of hers. His mouth moved from hers down to her neck and Emma arched against him, sliding her fingers down into his shirt and down across his shoulders. Her body felt heavy and languid there on the mattress, ready for any journey he wished to lead her on. She felt Horatio's hands on her legs, lifting her skirts and sliding up, warm palm against the softness of her thighs.

Emma's breath was coming in shallow gasps as he dared to brush his fingers in the heat at the centre of her thighs. Her mind protested fiercely-If she allowed this to go further, she would only end up heartbroken. Devastated.

But her body paid no heed to her fears. Come what may, she would have this one moment. It was better to know, Emma decided. She could not ask for a better, kinder, gentler tutor. Emma whimpered in surrender and buried her face in Horatio's neck when his fingers began to stroke her slowly. Emma captured his mouth again and gave herself up to her husband's touch. His mouth only left hers briefly to watch her while she came apart against his hand.

A.N:

Thank you to Becca for the pittie beta!

Kasora: Tickled as in thrilled. I'm thrilled you're enjoying the story so far and hope you liked this chapter. Don't apologize for rambling. I enjoy rambling feedback. (laughs) Hope you're feeling all better. I'm glad you like Emma. I try to make her likeable but realistic. Poison certainly sounds tempting! I'm sure given the chance at the moment, Emma would do it.

Sweet A.K: He might not be as angsty but that's only because he's 'dead' at the moment. (laughs) I've got plenty of angst for him yet, but I promise, some happiness for our dear Archie too. (smiles) The poor boy really needs a big ol' hug. Horatio's slowly making his way out of the dog house. (winks)