CHAPTER 11
Calleigh was doing what made her the most comfortable: firing her gun at the target on the range. As she placed her gun down, she noticed out of the corner of her eye Alexx walking up to her. Calleigh took off her protective gear and turned to face Alexx. Alexx got right to the point. "Have you told Ryan yet?" "Not yet." Alexx slightly frowned. Calleigh saw her reaction and placed her hand on Alexx's arm. "I didn't change my mind, Alexx. In fact, he should be down here any minute." Alexx looked at Calleigh with a sly smile on her face, glad that her friend didn't back out of her decision. "What makes you think he's coming down here? "Oh, it might have something to do with the fact that I purposely gave him a report without a signature." Calleigh broke into a devilish grin. "Oh, you naughty thing, you." Alexx said in a teasing voice. "You know that Ryan is paranoid about forgetting something on a report. Especially if he's the one who has to file it. Why do you think he looks it over about a million times before turning it in to H.?" Calleigh giggled. Alexx headed for the door. Turning around she stared at Calleigh with a serious look on her face. "I want details tomorrow, girl. DETAILS." "Bye, Alexx." Calleigh put her gun and equipment away and waited.
About two minutes after Alexx left, Ryan came walking in. He walked over to Calleigh, who had her back to him. "Calleigh?" She pretended that she didn't hear Ryan say her name. He repeated her name again. "Calleigh?" This time she turned around and looked at Ryan. He was standing there, his jacket over his left arm, holding the file in his right hand. "Detective Wolfe!" Calleigh was intentionally speaking in a thick drawl. "What brings you here?" "You didn't sign the report you turned into me." Ryan replied in a somewhat agitated tone. "H. will chew me out if I turn this in incomplete." "Oh, I'm sorry, Ryan. I've had something on my mind all day and I guess I wasn't thinking clearly when I gave this to you." Calleigh took the report from his hand and walked over to the table to sign it. "That's not usual of you to be distracted so easily, Calleigh." Ryan placed his jacket down and came over to the table. "Well…" Calleigh paused. "I've been wanting to ask you a question. And I've been thinking all day how to say it." "What question would that be?" Calleigh looked at Ryan. Now that she had the ball rolling, there was no way it was going to stop now. "I want…no I need to know if you and Christine are together." Ryan took a step back from Calleigh. "Did Delko put you up to this?" Calleigh was startled by Ryan's question and his tone. "No, I need to know for myself." "Why? So you and Eric can make fun of my personal life? Christine is my friend. There's nothing between us. Are you happy now?" Calleigh didn't think that Ryan would respond to her question like this. "Ryan, I'm not making fun of your personal life. I have to know." Ryan could feel himself reaching the breaking point. He was sick and tired of people questioning his relationship with Christine. He knew deep down they all ask because they couldn't believe that someone like Christine would want a guy like him. He thought he wouldn't have to deal with this anymore. First Eric and now Calleigh, of all people, was asking him about the very thing that hurt him to the core: 'You'll never be good enough for any girl, Ryan. So why would this girl be interested in you?'
Ryan couldn't hold his thoughts in anymore. "Christine and I have never been involved. Never have and never will. I hope knowing this will make you sleep better at night." Calleigh just stared at Ryan while he continued. "Did I ever wanted to be with her? Yes. But I knew…WE knew that would never happen. I love her. And I rather have her in my life as a friend than never have her in my life at all. I accepted the fact a long time ago that I'll never be good enough for any woman-" "What?" Calleigh interrupted him. "How can you ever say that? Don't you ever say that!" Ryan pointed at himself. "Calleigh, look at who you're talking to." Calleigh walked over to Ryan. His words of not being good enough for any woman hurt her more than a slap to the face. All this time, all these feelings she had for him should have been more than enough for Ryan to realize that someone wanted him. God knows that she gave off enough signs. And yet, he was telling Calleigh to her face that he wasn't good enough for anybody. He wasn't even going to try to admit any feelings she knew he had towards her, he was just going to give up. "I need to go, Calleigh." Ryan started to walk around Calleigh to get the report on her desk when he felt a hand grab his left arm. "Don't you walk away from me." The unmistakable coldness in Calleigh's voice stopped Ryan dead in his tracks. He turned around and looked at her. Calleigh glared at Ryan, tears welling in her eyes. Ryan tried to say something, but couldn't do anything but stare at her. "You listen to me right now." Calleigh swallowed hard, trying to hold back the tears. "I-I've been carrying a torch for you for so goddamn long, it's burning a hole through my soul." "Cal-" Ryan tried to speak, but Calleigh cut him off. "No. don't you dare say a damn word. I've been in love with you for so long and I could never find a way or the words to tell you how I felt. And to have you tell me to my face that you're worthless and don't mean shit to anybody just kills me inside. How you could be so fucking clueless is beyond me. But if you don't feel the same way towards me like I do towards you, I don't want to know. Your actions right now are more than enough. I don't want to deal with this anymore. Just leave. Grab your report and get out. I'm tired with justifying my behavior for you. Just know this-when you walk out of this office, you'll be walking out on the woman who thinks that you're good, no, GREAT enough for her."
Calleigh let go of Ryan's arm. He stood there for a moment, speechless. Without saying a word, he walked over to Calleigh's desk and picked up the report. He looked back over to Calleigh. She had her back to him, crying softly. He headed for the door. Calleigh felt her heart sink even deeper as she heard his footsteps get farther and farther away from her. Suddenly, they stopped. Calleigh stood there, waiting for the footsteps to continue on into the hallway. Instead, she heard them coming towards her. As she turned around, Ryan reached out and pulled her into his arms, lifted her up and placed a kiss on her lips. He held her for a few seconds, kissing her the entire time. Ryan then lowed Calleigh gently back down onto the floor. Trying to collect her thoughts over what just happened, Calleigh stood there quietly for what seemed like an eternity. She finally looked up at Ryan. Ryan looked confused, not sure of what was going to happen next. "Calleigh," he softly whispered. "I'm sorry if you didn't-" Calleigh cut him off by pulling his head down to hers, her mouth quickly finding his. The contact of their lips made Calleigh feel like somebody who was underwater for a long period of time finally reaching the surface to take in a breath of air. Their lips separated. Calleigh looked back up at Ryan. Ryan finished what he was trying to say. "Calleigh, I'm sorry if you didn't think that I didn't have any feelings for you. I just didn't know how to get them out. In fact, I think I was more scared of what your reaction would have been if I did tell you." "What kind of reaction would that be?" Calleigh said, as she ran his fingers through his hair. How she always longed to feel his dark hair around her fingers. Ryan continued. "Uh, the kind of reaction where you would have torn my head off." "I think I just did." Calleigh whispered into his ear. "I'm sorry about that." "No, that's ok. I think it needed to be done," Ryan said as he leaned down to kiss Calleigh again. "It was the very thing that made me realize what a fool I've been to keep quiet around you." They kissed. "I think I'm getting used to this." Muttered Ryan. Calleigh let out a little chuckle. He stood back up, taking Calleigh's hands into his. "Where do we go from here?" "I've got an answer for that. Why don't you grab the report I'm waiting for and bring it up to my office?" Both Ryan and Calleigh looked at each other in shock, realizing that Horatio was behind them. Ryan turned around to see a very pissed Horatio, standing in the doorway of Calleigh's office, hands on his hips.
to be continued…