A/N:"By Your Side" is a song I wrote a while back that I had put aside because I didn't know what to do with it. Given that I wrote it with Emily Procter in mind, I thought that it would be appropriate to use part of it in this chapter.
Roger
P.S. "By Your Side" is copyrighted. ©2004 The Final Step Forward/ASCAP
CHAPTER 18
"It's open." Ryan opened the door to see Horatio sitting at his desk with Calleigh lying down on the sofa. Calleigh looked at Ryan and sat up. "Ryan! Come join us." She reached over and patted the sofa cushion next to her. Ryan shot a quick glance at Horatio, who was staring right at him. Ryan walked over and sat down next to Calleigh. "How did the briefing go?" She asked. "Just fine." Ryan answered. "I'm not interrupting anything am I?" "Heavens, no. Horatio and I were just talking." Calleigh said as she looked back over at Horatio. Ryan turned his head to talk at Horatio. "Is there anything else we need to do before we go?" "No, the two of you are done here." Horatio replied. "Go and enjoy the rest of the weekend." "Oh, we certainly intend to." Calleigh responded in a cheerful tone. Ryan frowned. As much as he respected the relationship between Calleigh and Horatio, Ryan didn't like the fact that Calleigh probably told Horatio things about him that he didn't want Horatio to know. He looked back at Calleigh. "Cal, are you ready to go?" "Yes, I am." Calleigh stood up and walked over to Horatio and placed her hand on his. "Thanks again for the talk, H." "You're quite welcome." Horatio said as he revealed a small smile. "Now get out if here before I assign you some work and make you stay the rest of the day." "Yes, sir." Calleigh playfully pretended to give a mock salute to Horatio, which caused Horatio to slightly chuckle. Ryan got up and walked over to the two of them. "Have a good weekend, H." "You too, Ryan." Horatio answered as reached for the phone. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to make a few phone calls before I leave myself." Ryan and Calleigh left Horatio's office and headed back downstairs. As they reached the front door of headquarters, Calleigh rubbed her stomach. "We need to stop somewhere and get a bite to eat. I'm famished." "I'm with you on that one. We didn't eat any breakfast." Ryan said as he heard his stomach growling. Calleigh turned to face him. "I wonder why." She whispered as she gave Ryan a quick kiss. Ryan grinned. "You want to stop by the deli?" Ryan opened the door and waited for Calleigh to walk through first. "Sounds great. How about instead of eating there, we take it back to your place?" Calleigh replied as she walked out into the parking lot. "That's perfectly fine with me, Cal." Ryan walked ahead of Calleigh to open up the car door for her. "You're such a perfect gentleman." Calleigh said to Ryan as she got in. "I can't help it. It's the way I was raised." Ryan shut her door and walked around to his side and got in. Calleigh leaned over at him. "There's nothing wrong with the way you were raised." She grabbed his chin to turn his face towards her and she gave him a kiss. "Thank you." "You're welcome." Ryan answered as he raised his hand up to touch her face. Suddenly, the moment was interrupted by the sound of Ryan's stomach growling again; this time very loudly. Calleigh looked down at his stomach and laughed. "I think your stomach is trying to tell us something." Ryan reached over to turn the ignition. "I think you're right." He pulled the car out onto the road and headed for the deli.
They soon arrived at Ryan's apartment. Calleigh had never been over before. In fact, she wasn't sure if anybody on the team had ever been over. A few times in the not so distant past, she was tempted to drive to his place to see where he lived. Mostly out of curiosity and the urge to confront Ryan about her feelings, but second thoughts would always get the best of her and she would change her mind. "You'll have to excuse the mess," Ryan said as he turned the key. "But I was expecting to be home last night to clean up the place." Calleigh grinned at his comment. The two walked into the kitchen, where Ryan immediately grabbed the pizza box and beer cans that were sitting on the table and threw them into the trash. As Ryan turned on his sink to quickly scrub the few dishes that he left sitting around, Calleigh placed her stuff down and stepped into his living room to take a look. It was a typical bachelor's pad: very spacious with only a small sofa, TV and a coffee table. Calleigh noticed a little bookshelf in the corner. She walked over to it and saw that the first shelf was full of biology and science books. She looked at the second shelf and it was nothing but sci-fi novels. "Geek." She thought to herself as she let out a little chuckle. Ryan walked up to her, holding her bag and dress. "Cal, where do you want me to put your things?" She turned to face him. "Your bedroom would be fine." They both walked down the hall to Ryan's bedroom. Calleigh immediately noticed a guitar sitting next to his computer. "Ryan, I didn't know you could play an instrument!" She gushed. "Well, it never came up at work and I don't play it enough to consider myself a virtuoso." Ryan answered as he opened his closet to hang up her dress and place the bag on the floor. "But I can bash out a few songs on it." Calleigh went to sit down on Ryan's bed. As she sat down, she instantly fell backwards into the center of the bed, not realizing that he had a waterbed. "Oh!" She cried out. Ryan turned around to look as she righted herself. "Sorry about that. I never mentioned that I had a waterbed, too." "That's ok, Ryan." Calleigh said as she reached out for Ryan to pull her up. As Ryan grabbed her hand, intending to pull her up, she purposely pulled him onto the bed. He fell in, landing on top of her. "Oops. My bad." Calleigh naughtily whispered into his ear. Her mouth quickly found his and they started to kiss passionately. The moment was broken when all of a sudden Calleigh's stomach let out an embarrassing growl. Ryan laughed. "I guess it's your stomach's turn." Calleigh's face turned a bright red. She looked at him. "I guess we better get up and eat before we can't hear ourselves over our stomachs. Will you take a raincheck?" She sighed. Ryan got back up and pulled her out of the bed. "Yes I will. And you can bet that I'll be collecting on it later." "I expect you to." Calleigh replied as she took his hand and headed out the bedroom door.
They walked back into the kitchen to eat their lunch. Calleigh reached into the bag to pull out the sandwiches while Ryan opened the refrigerator. "Cal, what would you like to drink? Milk? Soda? Water?" "Milk is fine." She answered. He grabbed the carton of milk and two glasses and brought them to the table. He poured her a glass and then one for himself. The two of them sat down and started to eat their meal. "So, you got our reservation at Lombardi's?" Calleigh asked as she wiped her mouth. Ryan smiled. "Gee, Cal…how do you know I called Lombardi's?" "Because you know that I'm a 'child of habit' about certain things." Calleigh replied. "Well, I thought that we could use a change this time." Ryan said as he reached for his glass of milk. "To my luck, McDonalds now takes dinner reservations." "What!" Calleigh threw her napkin at Ryan. He ducked, laughing. "Relax, Cal. I'm kidding. Yes, I got the reservation for 10:30 tonight." "10:30?" Calleigh was curious about the time. "Why did you schedule it that late?" "I scheduled it that late so we can do something else first." Ryan intentionally looked away from Calleigh, hoping that the gesture would make her ask where they were going. It worked. "What are we doing before dinner?" "What are we doing?" Ryan looked back at her. "I'm taking you dancing tonight." Calleigh had a quizzical look on her face for a brief moment, then her eyes got wide. "Ryan! I thought you didn't like dancing." "Where did you hear that from?" Ryan asked. "Eric." She answered. "Oh, it figures that you heard it form Eric." Ryan picked up his sandwich to take another bite. "He always seems to leak out any information I give him about my personal life. Let me guess…he told you about the rest of the date I had with his girlfriend's roommate and how well I danced with her." "He told me a few days ago." Calleigh admitted in a somewhat guilty tone. Ryan snapped his fingers. "There you go. Well, did he tell you that I don't consider that dancing?" Ryan looked at Calleigh as she shook her head. "Well, I'm taking you somewhere tonight that I consider dancing." "Wow." Calleigh paused, and then spoke again. "Any other secrets you've been hiding from me?" "No secrets at all." Replied Ryan as he took another bite of his sandwich. "I just don't reveal a lot about myself unless I'm directly asked."
They finished their meal and walked back into the bedroom. Calleigh climbed back onto the bed as Ryan reached for his guitar. "Would you like me to play you something?" He asked as he got on the bed. "I would love that, Ryan." Calleigh moved over to give Ryan some room. He sat down and played a few songs that he knew as Calleigh laid on one side of her body, leaning on her elbow. As Ryan finished the last song, she sat up. "You're very good. Do you write any songs of your own?" "Well, I have something that I've been working on for some time now," Ryan spoke in a somewhat nervous voice. "I'm not quite finished with it." Calleigh moved closer to Ryan. "Will you play it for me?" "But it's uh, not done yet." Ryan said as he started to stammer. Calleigh reached up and stroked his cheek. "I want to hear it. It's ok." Ryan let out a little sigh. "Don't say that I didn't warn you." He strummed the chords as he slowly closed his eyes. Calleigh wasn't sure if he closed them because he was trying to remember how the song went or if he was too nervous to look at her. He started to sing:
Her hair is golden like the sun
And her eyes as blue as the sky
There's nothing that I wouldn't give
To taste those lips of wine
I've studied every curve of her body
Every line upon her face
I want to take her into my existence
Her soul I want to embrace
I find myself so empty
When she's not around
It throws off my happiness
And it turns my world upside-down
And when she is next to me
Words can't describe what I feel inside
All I need is one smile from her
To make me feel so alive
I want her so badly
To be a part of my life
I want to reach out and pull her close to me
And have her by my side
Ryan opened his eyes and stopped playing. "That's about all I have so far." He looked over at Calleigh. "Cal?" Calleigh sat there quietly, with tears in her eyes. "The song is that bad, huh?" Ryan said as he set the guitar down. "No," Calleigh finally spoke as she wiped the tears away. "That was very beautiful." Ryan moved over to be closer to Calleigh. "Are you sure? The song is not done and the words are kind of corny." "The words are not corny." Calleigh shot back. "You wrote the song about me, didn't you?" Ryan looked away. "Yes, yes I did." He replied in a hushed tone, as if he was embarrassed to answer Calleigh's question. She reached over and turned his head to make him look at her. "Do you know why I'm crying? I'm crying because that touched me. You actually love me enough to put what you feel into a song. It means a lot to me that you would do something like that." Ryan raised his hand and wiped away a stray tear that she missed. Calleigh leaned forward and gave him a deep kiss. "There's something that I feel I need to tell you," Calleigh said as she looked down at the bed. "For the longest time, when I would sleep at night, I would have these horrible nightmares that something is chasing me. I can't explain what it is. I'm always running away from it, hoping it wouldn't get me. I think it had something to do with being alone for so long and not having anybody to love. I always wanted to love again, but I always doubted myself and lived in fear of being once again hurt. Sometimes I felt so sad because I was alone and not having anybody to give my love to that…" Calleigh couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence. She started to cry. Ryan immediately reached over and pulled her next to him. "It's ok." He whispered. "I know exactly how you feel." Ryan brushed her hair away from her face. "But we have each other now and I have no intention of letting you go." "I hope not." Calleigh answered. Ryan looked at the clock. "We have a few hours left before we have to leave. Do you want to do anything?" "I just want to lay here with you." Calleigh said as she looked up at him. "Just hold me."
The two of them laid there quietly in each other arms without saying another word to each other.
to be continued...