Live Like You Were Dying

Title: Live Like You Were Dying
Author: kazeko
Show: Power Rangers
Rating: R
Chapters: ?
Series: no, also no relation to "Children of the Gods"
Multipart: yes
Time: About a year after Power Rangers in Space, changing the Power Rangers timeline after that
Couple(s): Tommy/Kimberly, Jason/Kat, Tanya/Adam
Disclaimer: Saban and Disney own Power Rangers and they don't deserve it if they won't release MMPR on DVD!
Disclaimer 2: I own everything else, including characters, other planets, and the plot.

Chapter 8: Confessions of the White Rangers

Tommy waved his hand and activated the bloodstones, moving the entire group back to Tanya's apartment. He and Jason moved to Kimberly's side as the conversation between the two Pink Rangers ceased. The other Rangers pulled Kat into their midst, Tanya filling her friend in on the turn of the conversation. Kimberly glanced at her husband, a question in her eyes, but the Mage didn't get a chance to answer before is former self moved forward. "Kimberly, tell us about the plague."

Kat answered when her predecessor would not. "It's a magic-based contagious infliction that originated with the Dragons from whom the Shamirii get their power. When an infected Shamiri performs a spell with or very near another Shamiri, the second Mage is certain to catch it. She told me that the plague will usually sterilize weaker Mages like Queen Anarii, but she never said what it does to powerful Mages." All eyes turned to Kimberly and Tommy, and they looked away, swallowing. "Kimberly, all you did when I asked you was to change the answer. Answer me now. What happens to strong Mages when they get the plague?"

"We die," Kimberly whispered, tears in her eyes. "There's no cure, no going back, no preventing it. If strong Mages catch the plague, we never recover. Sometimes it takes a long time for the symptoms to appear, especially if we don't use magic at all during that time, but it happens eventually."

"How long have you had the plague, Kim?"

At Trini's question, the Power Rangers fell to the chairs and couch, reality hitting them. Kimberly really was going to die, and for the first time ever there was nothing they could do to save her. "Ten years," she whispered. "Ten years ago the three of us cast a spell to rid Shamirin Prime of the plague, but we weren't strong enough. We were too damn confident and I realized at the last second that it wasn't going to work. Our spell didn't have a focus, one person through whom the energy was flowing, and I knew that if we didn't refocus the spell, the entire planet would catch the plague. I shifted the spell and became the focus. I got the plague, but Tommy and Jason were okay, and the planet was no worse off than it had been."

"How long do you have to live?"

Kimberly bit her lip at young Jason's question. "My nurse, Narethi, promised me no more than a week after the first power explosion. We have to find Shana, dead or alive, before then, so I can pass Anarii's power on to her."

"What if she's dead?"

"Then all hope for curing the plague dies with her." Kimberly smiled, remembering to the day she birthed Shana, tears in her eyes. "Tommy and I didn't have any children before I was infected, and we found out that I could only pass my powers onto a child who was born powerless or had her powers stripped when she was born. The same thing was true when Anarii was searching for her princess. Since there were no candidates, Anarii and Narethi determined that I had to have a child."

"Wouldn't you want to?"

"Of course I wanted a child, but Tommy and I hadn't quite gotten around to that yet. You see, Shamirii can live for a thousand or more years, and we had all the time we needed. When we found out that I had to get pregnant, I refused initially."

"Why?"

Kat answered Zack before Kimberly could speak again. "It's because of that power transfer thing you told me about, isn't it? Your power would pass to her and to Tommy and you didn't want either of them to suffer as you did."

"Exactly. When two Shamirii . . ." She blushed, looking at her husband. "This is so embarrassing, Tommy. When two Shamirii . . . make love, it's not just a physical thing. Empowered Shamirii can only conceive with the aid of Dragon Power—we don't control the power exactly, but the urge to have a child activates them. If Tommy and I even made love . . . he would catch it." She reached out and took Tommy's hand, unable to look at her husband. "We haven't even been able to sleep in the same bed for a decade. I have to wear a necklace that warns Tommy, Jason, and Narethi if I try to use my powers, intentionally or not."

"Then how did you conceive Shana?"

Tommy tuned in at Trini's question, eyes flying to Kimberly's face. Dying. How could she be dying? How could his future self permit it? "Don't you love her?" He didn't realize he had blurted his thoughts out until everyone turned to find the former white ranger staring at his future self.

The older Tommy gestured toward Tanya's bedroom. "Come with me. I can see that we have a lot of things to talk about."

Tommy sat down on the bed, glancing up at his future self, watching the Mage as he closed the door and leaned against the window, staring out. "It's not easy, being here. All I can see is the mistakes I made so long ago and I want to tell you what to do, what to change, to keep my past from becoming your future. But I can't. It's not that we have some sort of law to keep time travelers silent—because we don't—and it really hasn't happened that many times before, but Kimberly won't let us do anything to save her."

"Why not?"

The Mage laughed, glancing over his shoulder at the younger ex-Ranger. "I sometimes forget what I was like back then. What Kimberly didn't say is that our spell cured the Dragons of the plague. We need them more than we need powerful Shamirii. Anarii has created a spell for her heir to cast that will start to break the power dependency between the Dragons and the Shamirii. We won't be Mages anymore and we won't get the plague. It was Kim's idea. She doesn't want anyone else to suffer the loss of a loved one."

"What does Shana have to do with any of this?"

"She just might be the cure, Tommy. She was born with immense power but free of the plague. We had to use a powerful timed spell and a type of artificial insemination for Kimberly to get pregnant in the first place, and the procedure almost always guarantees a powerless child. When Shana was born, Baliree could hear her from Earth. She was born with power and free of the plague. It was a miracle." He smiled, staring out across the city, remembering simpler days when he was still human. "Kimberly can pass her power on with no fears, because her daughter is the cure. We couldn't give her the powers when she was born, and Kimberly wanted to wait until the last possible second to make sure that Shana is strong enough to handle the power. She doesn't have much time left, though."

"Why didn't you do anything to help her? I know that you love Kimberly because I still do and I will never stop. If there was anything I could do to save her, I would have."

"Don't you think I tried?!" Tommy whirled on his younger self, controlling the white power that enveloped his frame and threatened to fill the room. "I tried everything, but there was nothing I could do! The only thing we could do to keep Kimberly alive for as long as possible was to keep her from doing any magic at all. For nine years that worked, then Anarii and Narethi determined that Kimberly had to get pregnant. There was no choice and she was slowly creeping closer to the onset of the symptoms. A pregnancy takes a lot of power for a Shamiri, and Kimberly had to go into seclusion with some of the Dragons she cured and powerless Shamirii during her pregnancy. Jason and I weren't allowed under any circumstances to see her. You have no idea how hard it is to know where the woman you love is, but she's just out of reach and you can't see her."

"Yes I do," Tommy whispered, staring at his hands. "Do you remember how hard it was to let her go to Florida? I thought about her every day, and I wanted her so badly. I don't have to tell you how many times I thought about rushing off to Florida and bringing her home, how often I imagined sweeping her off her feet after the Pan-Globals and begging her to marry me."

"I just wanted to see her, hold her when the morning sickness was too much, tell her that she was beautiful with a big round belly, watch her lie there at night when she thought I was asleep and rub her belly, talking to our daughter," Tommy whispered, joining his younger self on the bed. "We had a direct holo-feed from her retreat to my room, and I called her at least twice a day. I wanted to be there, to share the experience with her. Some couples have been close enough that the husband would feel the baby kick as if he was the pregnant one. I wanted that, I wanted to lay my hand on her stomach and feel Shana and know that she was waiting to come out and join us. We knew that she wouldn't last long after giving birth, and all I wanted was to spend what time she had with her, but I had to stay away for our daughter's sake."

"I wrote her letters, but I'm so damn forgetful that I started to let them slide. I would let being a Ranger take more and more of my time until I devoted none to her, not calling, not writing; eventually I started thinking of Kat as the Pink Ranger. When that happened, I lost her. I don't blame Kimberly for what happened; I'm the one who stopped trying. She did everything she could to keep our relationship strong, but I was too weak. She deserves someone who cared, who would be there, who wouldn't let anything be more important than her. Once, that was me. Before she sent me that letter, I thought that we were okay, that everything was as it had been when she was in Angel Grove, but I was so wrong. It was like a wake-up call, and I chose not to acknowledge my mistakes. I let Kat and my own insecurities draw me away. I should have gone to Florida when I got that letter and told Kim how much I loved her and that I would do whatever it took to prove it, but I just went to the pond and felt sorry for myself."

"Narethi was vehemently opposed to me attending the birth, but she was my wife, damn it all, and I deserved to be there! So Jason and I teleported to her side the instant the first labor pains hit her, and there were seventeen Mages there to keep our powers separate. I was by her side the entire time, being there when she needed me most as I had not been when she went away to Florida, and then Shana was born and she was the most beautiful little baby . . . her first mental cry pierced the Mages' shields and reached all the way even to Earth and Kimberly cried when she learned that her baby was free of the plague."

"And now that I've finally realized what I did wrong, Dervalet captured Kimberly and I don't even know why she's still alive!"

"And now that I have her back in my arms where she belongs, Dervalet captured our baby and Kimberly's going to die within the week!"

The pair sighed and spoke together. "I've found her just in time to lose her." They looked at each other and laughed, the other's words finally registering, both feeling lighter and stronger after their talk. "We'll get her back from Dervalet," the Mage promised. "I love her and I won't deny her the last seventy-seven years of her life."

"She came back here to die, didn't she? Kimberly wanted to see her old friends and remember what they were like years ago, one last time before she passed her powers on to Shana and died."

"Yeah." The two Tommys stood up, smiling. "Shall we go see if she's finished with her explanation?"

TBC