From Darkness Through 'Til Light

Mary Stacy

Part One

" I don't suppose that you saw Ja' te'ar today for those new cuttings she was supposed to be sending my way?"

"And why would you assume that I would forget such a thing? They are on your workbench in the garden."

Playfully, Amanda reached across the table and gently swatted his hand. Quickly, he captured the hand in response and she laughed. These times at home, when he would let the mask fall and delight in his wife, were all he asked of life, and never seemed to be frequent enough at times when duty would call him aside.

"Would you like some more che-chi?"

"It is quite good."

"Well, give me my hand back and I will pour you some more."

Sarek felt the cool advance of her bare foot along the length of his left calf, a tempting promise for events that would be played out later that evening. He held her hand for another long moment, giving it a quick squeeze before releasing it.

"You know, I can't believe how expensive this has gotten recently."

"You are worrying about money now, my wife?" He questioned her as he held up the glass to savor the heady sapphire brew. They had been introduced to it on one of the first missions Amanda had accompanied him on, more than fifty Terran years past. From that time onward, she had always managed to find a flask in some hidden corner of the market to surprise him with every few months.

"Of course not, silly, its just I remember when we were first married and I could buy it for…."

Amanda's voice trailed off as he found himself surrounded in sudden darkness. He could hear the echo of his son's distant call in his mind and as he reached out across the vast expanse to touch it, it was lost. His mind reeled back in with the tatters of a little used, but until this moment, always present bond. Something had happened to Spock, he was sure of it, and it seemed the glass had broken in his hand …

…They had given their only child the gift of life so many years ago, and now their son had returned that gift to him. His son… how many years had gone by since he had allowed those words to even cross his mind? Sarek looked down at the veins in his hands, considering the blood now running through them. How would one ever be able to compute the odds for this cycle of events? That blood that ran through those veins was now in part his son's blood. And as he turned that thought over in his mind, he realized he would like to think that some small portion of Amanda had made it through the filters and raced throughout the course of his body as well, bringing it nourishment, sustaining him, healing his spirit and his body.

"Sarek?"

He turned from his mediation and stood slowly at the sound of his wife's voice. The healing trace had far advanced the process, but still it would not to well to push himself too quickly. He put on a neutral face and turned to meet Amanda's eyes.

"It's about time to go."

He knew she did not like to intrude on his mediation, but she had been hovering as close she could these last few days, and he had allowed it, knowing that he owed her much for keeping things from her. Amanda liked to say, "payback is a bitch" in private and he supposed, when she deemed him well enough, her husband would found out just how much she intended to mete out. For now, he would let her attend to him as she desired, and if it could be admitted, that attention was something he always found desirable.

"Indeed."

He turned to leave the room, but as he did, she took hold of the sleeve of his tunic, and repeated his name again, this less of a question than a statement.

"Sarek…."

He raised his brows in question of the slight worry lines that appeared between hers, "My wife?"

"Is it really all right now? I mean everything? Not just physically, but do you think…"

She always had a way of letting her thoughts trail off, waiting for him to finish them for her. It was a part of the rhythm of their lives, that their minds would intertwine like this from time to time, reassuring one another of the strength of their connection. He brought himself close and allowed himself the luxury of caressing her chin with his hand and then reached up as if to erase those worry lines. If he would have his way, she would never have had need of them.

"Between Spock and I?"

She nodded, hopefully in response.

"Let us say that we have come to an understanding."

She moved to lightly kiss his hand and smiled. He knew she had long desired a truce between the men in her life, and was often frustrated by the fact that she had a husband renowned for his negotiating skills everywhere but home. Hearing even those guarded words from him, Sarek knew that would bring her great happiness. And he found they gave him a two-fold joy, to be able to say them, not just for her sake, but for his own as well.

They held their eyes and thoughts as one for a precious few moments before the chime broke their spell, signaling their escort had arrived.

"We are packed then?" He asked as they pulled away and she laughed, knowing in reality he had full confidence in her ability to have them ready and able to get where they needed to be in an admirably timely manner.

"No thanks to you!"

Amanda squeezed his hand for a brief moment before letting it go to release the door. He watched as she crossed the room to greet their escort, the happiness of the day filling her heart and reverberating through the room. It had been so long since this sense of completeness had been a part of his household. She looked up at her husband in anticipation, and he answered it, by looking the newcomer in the eyes squarely and nodding in greeting.

"My son."

There was a moment's hesitation, as if the word had been forgotten in long disuse. But finally, a reply.

"Father…"

…… "Sarek!"

He looked down at the emerald drops falling to the white cloth below, the glass now shattered in his hand.

"Sarek?"

Amanda was at his side now, her voice filled with urgency and fear, "What's wrong?"

Her pulled her close to him, taking her within his arms, heedless of the open wound in his hand. It was little next to the one he held in his heart, one which he knew he could not keep from her, and one which he must now inflict on his wife as well. Sarek let the name fall in a rasp from his throat.

"Spock…"