"What the-" Buffy was in a completely different place. She was in a bright meadow area filled with flowers which was a deep contrast between the trees that formed a dismal barrier around her. To her right was a wooden picnic basket. She carefully folded up the lid and saw some yellow cake with white frosting and a bottle of wine. As Buffy moved in such a way, she felt something holding her down. It was a red velvet cape. "Oh great. Now I'm Red Riding Hood. Last time I dressed as her it didn't turn out so well. That is unless you like a possessed house with creepy doors and then non-doors." Buffy stood up from the bed of violet flowers she was in. "And considering my luck so far today this shouldn't be any different." Buffy realized that Spike wasn't with her. "Spike!" she yelled, hoping to get an answer. "Spike!" She was getting no response. Wait, she might've heard something faint unless it was her imagination. "Spike!" She did! She heard him calling to her. I never thought I'd be happy hearing Spike call out my name. Wait… eewww gross. She walked in his direction, entering the forest. "Spike!"
"Buffy!" Spike yelled. He was dressed in a red plaid shirt with dirty jeans and suspenders and big, black boots. Resting on his left shoulder was an ax. "Buffy!"
After another couple minutes of yelling they met up with each other in some brush. Buffy cracked up at the sight of Spike. "You look ridiculous!" she said between giggles. She was having trouble standing because of her full body laughter.
"Well aware Slayer."
Buffy inhaled deeply. "Okay." She turned to face him but only laughed more when she saw him again. "I'm sorry it's just so funny!"
"Ha ha," Spike said sarcastically. "Poke fun at Paul Bunyan. I at least have a nifty ax. You're stuck with a picnic basket. Good luck protectin' yourself with that."
Buffy settled herself and looked at Spike. "I still happen to be a Slayer and very good at improvising."
"What's in there anyway?" Spike reached for it but Buffy pulled it away.
"None of your business."
"You got some whips and handcuffs in there Slayer?"
"Why do you keep thinking like that?" Buffy inquired, expecting a real answer.
"Like what love?"
"Like a guy." Spike looked down at himself as a response. "And stop calling me love." Buffy turned back in the direction she came from.
"I know this little story. Haven't taken any shortcuts have ya?" Spike asked as he followed her.
"I found myself in a flower field and then I called for you. So, no." Buffy pushed away the hanging branches and weaved around the pricker bushes.
"Where we goin'?"
"There was a path back here."
"Dunno Slayer, Big Bad Wolf might pop out and say 'boo.'" Spike had himself a little chuckle.
"Well then you can cut him in half with your 'nifty ax.'" Buffy pushed forward and made it to the dirt path she had passed. "Here we are."
"Now which way do we go?"
"I'm goin' with a Ralphie."
"Say that again," Spike requested.
"It's a funny way Willow and I distinguish right and left. Right's a Ralphie and left is a-"
"Wait, let me guess. A loophie." Spike laughed at his own joke. Buffy wasn't joining in.
"Actually it's Louie, but close," she said with a sneer.
"You and your Scoobies are a bunch of whack jobs, ya know that Slayer?"
"You're the one that's always hanging around us," Buffy retorted. She continued down the path remaining cautious of her surroundings. Spike's voice kept chattering away and making it hard for her to hear on coming prey.
"And ya think you lot would know that-"
"Spike!" Buffy yelled as she faced him. "I can not hear anything except you yapping your trap. So zip it and pay attention to the problem at hand!" Buffy turned back to the path and continued on her way.
"Our problem? We're walking down an empty path and the sun's shining. Bloody hell!" he screamed realizing he's been close to exposure to the sun's rays.
"Alternate dimension retardo," Buffy eluded.
"Right, I knew that. Anyway, this is an alternate dimension to me but probably not the vampire grandma we're headin' for right? We'll be-" Before Spike could finish his sentence the sky became dark and the sun was gone.
Buffy furrowed her brow and faced Spike. "Why did you say that! Every time someone says that, something bad happens. You totally screwed us!"
"Calm down Miss Muffit."
"I'm Little Red Riding Hood! Notice the cape?" Buffy stopped once she heard something rustling. "What was that?"
"What?" Spike's mouth was rapidly coated by Buffy's hand. Her warm skin heated up his entire body. The rustling started again and Buffy's head darted in its direction, which caused her to remove her hand from his mouth. "Oh, that." Their eyes were caught by a dark figure, running at top speed. "What the bloody hell is that?"
"I don't know." Suddenly it disappeared and the woods were silent. "Where did it go?"
Without warning, the giant beast jumped out onto the path. It was some sort of werewolf. A very big werewolf. It's teeth were huge and shining from it's drool. It was the size of a tow truck and it looked really hungry. Buffy and Spike screamed before darting in the other direction.
"What the Hell was that?" Spike asked. "Looked like a werewolf on steroids."
"Maybe that's supposed to be the wolf?" Buffy suggested.
"I don't remember the wolf being five stories high!" They were interweaving through the trees in hope of slowing the werewolf down.
He was right on their tail and he didn't lok phased at all by their running strategy. The werewolf was hitting tree trunks with his broad shoulders and they crumbled under his force. His claws were digging into the earth, leaving giant holes everywhere. He was growling from hunger which made Spike and Buffy try to run faster.
"Guessin' we can't outrun him love. What do you plan on doin'?"
"Stop calling me love!" Buffy screamed. She could feel the ground shaking every time the werewolf's feet met the ground.
"Got an idea." Spike grabbed Buffy's hand and jerked her right. The werewolf became angry at the sudden change in direction and used more strength to cut them off. "Do you trust me?" Spike asked as he kept running forward.
"Is that rhetorical?"
"I'm serious Slayer."
"There see, Slayer, why can't you say that more often."
The werewolf lept right in their path and growled. Spike kept running straight and dropped his legs and slid on the muddy surface over a cliff, Buffy followed behind him, unsure of where they were going. She held her breath at the last minute before she plunged into the water. The werewolf turned his head over the ledge and looked at the water. There was no movement. His breath was hoarse and deep. After one more minute of staring at the calm, blue surface he left.
Buffy came out of the water gasping for air. She swam over the edge where there was some sand and a couple rocks. She had short breath and an impulse to kill Spike (not that that was new, especially lately).
Spike trudged on land and screamed "Yea! Woo hoo! That was fun!"
"Fun?" Buffy repeated in anger and surprise.
"Can't say you were even a little excited Slayer? Don't ya just want to eat a big cookie?" Spike laughed.
"Spike, I am human. I can die in many other ways than a wooden stake being shoved in my heart."
"Are you dead?"
"No. Which is bad for you because you're going to be."
"Miss Muffit gonna rearrange my flower bed? Give me a basket with cookies in it? Oh no." Spike placed his hands on his face in mock fear.
Buffy untied the cape from her neck so it wouldn't strangle her and she stood up. She ignored Spike and grabbed her- Oh no! Buffy looked around frantically. "Where's my basket?"
"What?"
"The basket I was holding, where is it!" Buffy went back into the water and dived in.
"Buffy!" Spike went in after her. She came up as he was about to dive in. "What the bloody hella re you doing?"
"I need that basket."
"Why?"
"So I can give it to my grandma."
"It's not your grandma."
"But if ewe don't bring her the basket then we'll be stuck here forever and I do not want to spend the rest of my life running from a hairy Tyrannosaurus Rex." Buffy dived back in and swam around. Spike followed her and aided in the searching. They came back up. "I don't see it love."
"Stop calling me love," she said lightly, from her lack of breath.
"Must've dropped it before we fell over the cliff."
"We didn't fall over the cliff you pulled us over." Buffy trudged out of the water and grabbed her cape. She started heading up the steep hill.
"Buffy," Spike called out as he followed her. He shook his legs to remove excess water and made his way right behind her. She was struggling getting a good plant in the wet, swampy ground. "Buffy."
"Forget it Spike. I just want tog et out of her-!" She slipped and coated her chest with mud from her impact. "Oh great." She pushed herself off and tried wiping off as much as she could.
"Maybe we shouldn't go directly up the hill love."
"Why must you insist on calling me that?" Buffy grabbed for branches of the trees that were planted in the mud. "Yes. Yes, this is good." She pulled herself halfway up the hill. Spike made his way behind her and aided her as much as he could. He snuck in a few butt grabs on the way.
They made it to the top after about twenty minutes and there was no sign of the werewolf, well aside from the broken trees and huge gouges in the earth. "There it is!" Buffy spotted the basket and ran toward it. It turned out it was only the top of the basket. The rest of it lied in pieces across the grass. "That stupid, evil hairball! He destroyed my basket."
"He didn't even leave the wine?" Spike asked.
"Oh yea, somehow that stayed in tact. Hello, the basket is scattered in a two-foot radius! Nothing is left!"
"Maybe the old bird'll accept your offering of a broken basket."
Buffy exhaled her frustration. "This day sucks so much!"
Spike's head darted to the right. "Buffy, we gotta go." Spike grabbed her hand and pulled her back to the path they were originally on. Once they made it he ran in the direction they were going.
Buffy whipped her hand free, making Spike stop instantly. He thought something grabbed her but she just stopped on her own free will. "We have to keep going," Spike insisted.
"What is going on?"
"I can hear it."
"The werewolf?"
"No God, we're real close these days," Spike sarcastically commented.
"If you can hear it now why didn't you hear it earlier?"
"Because I was busy arguing with you."
"And what're we doing now?" Buffy asked.
"Not running which we have to do, now come on!"
Spike went to grab her hand but Buffy pulled it away. "I can run on my own."
"Then do it!" Spike quickened his pace and ran. Buffy shrugged and followed.
They ran for about five minutes and then came to a small cottage. Buffy knocked on the door. "Hello?" Buffy called.
"Hello?" someone answered.
"It's Buff- I mean, Red Riding Hood. Can I come in?"
"Of coarse child."
Buffy reached for the door but stopped herself. She walked to the small yellow mailbox and kicked it in half. She grabbed the piece plants in the ground as a stake. She went back to the door and turned the cold knob. The house was dark, the small windows provided little light. "Grandma?" She called into the house. "Hello?"
"What's her name?" Spike asked in a whisper.
"I dunno… Grandma." Buffy and Spike stayed back to back, observing their surroundings. Buffy made her way to the bed and held her stake tightly as she pulled backl the curtain. Her grandmother screamed at the sight of her holding a stake. It made Buffy scream and Spike scream. Finally Buffy stopped and comforted, "It's okay, it's okay. It's me." Her grandmother stopped screaming which made Spike stop in turn.
"Goodness gracious darling, what are you doing? You trying to give me a heart attack?"
"I'm sorry I came across a very big… ugh, thing and I thought maybe it got to you."
"No, sweetie, I'm fine." Her grandmother smiled. She was wearing a pink sleeping gown and big glasses resting on the perch of her nose. "Who is this?"
"Oh this is … Daren. I came across him in the woods. He's a lumber jack… guy." Buffy smiled to give her more comfort.
"You just met this man?"
"No, I've sadly known him for awhile."
Spike sneered at her comment and smiled back at the grandma. "Hello Mrs… Grandma. It's nice to meet you."
"You're British."
"Yes I am."
"What are you doing here?"
"I wish I knew." Spike kept a smile on, trying to be as nice as he could. His smile disappeared as he felt the ground shake. Buffy froze when she noticed it also.
"Oh dear, is that an earthquake?"
"I don't think we're that lucky," Buffy said.
Spike rushed to the window and tried to see something. "I don't see it."
"It?"
"That big thing I was telling you about," Buffy said.
"It's getting closer," Spike said, going back over to Buffy.
"No kidding!" Buffy took her grandmother's hand. "Grandma, we have to go."
"Go? I can't honey, I'm sick."
"Well you're gonna be dead if you stay here much longer."
"Little red, what is going on?"
"Would ya shut up and listen to her?" Spike yelled.
"He's not very nice," her grandmother said.
The werewolf crashed into the wall by the bed and sent everyone flying through the wall with the door. The bed landed on top of Spike and Buffy was lying out on the dirt path with broken stone and cement lying on her. Her dress was all cut up and she had a scratch on her cheek. "Spike," Buffy said with worry. She ran over to him and lifted the bed. Spike pushed himself out, not looking in great shape either. "Where's grandma?"
"Buffy," Spike said, noticing the huge creature that was standing in place of the house. Buffy turned her attention to the werewolf which had a piece of a pink dress between it's teeth.
"Oh my God."
"Let's walk carefully so not to grab his attention and then run when we're home free."
The werewolf's eyes darted in their direction. "Run!" Buffy yelled.