Guardian Roommates: Chapter 10: Hellhole
Capcom owns everyone, except Alia Crimson and Brad. The story is MINE! Now the trio has to live with the Resistance with their favorite blonde-haired reploid, and not so-favorite blonde haired human!
Harpuia hated carrying the luggage. Again, he found himself in his powered up jet form, holding a ton of boxes with Fef and Levi on each of his wings. All three weren't exactly comfortable with the thought of moving into the Resistance Base, but being completely banned from Neo Arcadia, they didn't know where else to go.
Finally, Harpuia landed in front of the huge gate. Levi hopped off and rang the doorbell. The operators responded through the speaker system.
"Who is it?" they both asked in unison.
"It's us." Levi responded.
"Us who?"
"Us us."
"Us us who?"
Harpuia yelled. "The guardians! Ciel invited us over!"
"Ooooh. Opening the doors, then."
The ground shook, knocking all the luggage off of Harpuia, who took the opportunity to resume default form and popped his back at least five times. Oddly enough, Fefnir was still asleep, until Harpuia threw a suitcase at his head, waking him up.
Two guard escorts led them inside.
Inside the base, Harpuia found himself covered with cats. If there was an animal Harpuia hated more than pigeons, it was cats. Both Levi and Fef were amazed that so many cats and plants surrounded the entire base. Everything else looked like ancient relics, at least in comparison to Neo Arcadia. The escort guards took their luggage.
A guard came before the three. "Ms. Ciel wishes to see you three in the command center. Follow me."
However, the guard led them into a huge empty room, the only thing visible is a soda machine near the door.
"Um, this is a soda machine." Levi said.
"Welcome to the command center. Please wait in the center of the room." he said, leaving.
All three shrugging, they all stood in the center of the empty dark room.
Suddenly, three huge metal boards came from behind them, and electrical rings came over their wrists and legs, strapping them onto the boards and turning them back, facing the ceiling. They couldn't move.
"You made it!" squealed the voice of an excited young girl.
"Ciel! You...!" Harpuia mumbled.
"Relax. There's just a few precautionary measures I need to take before you move in with us."
Ciel finally came out of a dark corner of the room, alone, holding what looked like three wristbands.
"She's going to take advantage of us! Run!" yelled Fefnir, finally speaking and trying to shake free.
Harpuia rolled his eyes. "No she's not, you moron."
He paused for a brief second.
"Are you?"
Ciel laughed. "No, I'm just going to attach these to your legs."
Levi stared at her. "We're not even going to ask."
Ciel smiled. "Too bad! These are my new discipline and tracking bands. Basically, I put these on you, they stay on you, and tell us where you are in the base. Also, if you three start to misbehave, just with the touch of a button, somewhere in this base, you feel a nasty shock on your body."
Levi laughed. "Hah! Not all of us are effected by shocks!"
Ciel shook her head. "Which is why they all do different things. The green one freezes the body, the blue one burns the body, and the red one shocks the body. Guess which one belongs to who."
Harpuia slammed his head against the board. Ciel must have forced Zero to exploit their weaknesses. Harpuia hated Ice, Levi hated fire, and Fefnir hated electrical shocks. All three tried to shake free as Ciel placed the bands on their legs, which fit perfectly and clicked into place.
Ciel was feeling a bit evil inside. "Anyone care for a demonstration?"
That moment, Harpuia and Levi started freaking out, yelling 'NO' at least a hundred times. Fefnir had his mind elsewhere.
"Um, could you take this off and have that red-headed chick with the nice ass put it back on?" he asked, letting out a confident perverted smile.
"Demonstration it is!" shouted Ciel, sweatdropping, then snapping her fingers.
That instant, Fefnir's body was covered in electricity for a brief moment, screaming in pain the whole time. Smoke covered the room.
"Any questions?" Ciel asked.
"Am I going to die?" asked Fefnir, before burping and coughing out some smoke.
"Not yet." Ciel replied.
Then, the electrical rings holding the three in place disappeared, the boards going back into the floor, allowing Harp and Levi to get up. Fef fell onto the ground, shocked and confused to what just happened.
"You get the floor below Zero's room." Ciel replied, walking into the darkness. "You get the basement!"
Harpuia's mouth dropped to the floor. "The basement?" He could picture the basement now. A dirty unvisited wasteland probably filled with cats, bugs, and the noisy ice machine. Knowing his luck, he'd probably wind up in the room right next to it.
Ciel's voice echoed the dark room. "We've got four rooms down there. Zero's on the first area of the basement, and you get the second area of the basement."
"Fun." Leviathan snickered.
The three entered the second basement, to their surprise looked like the other floors on the resistance base. Harpuia looked pleasantly surprised. No cats here.
They found their bags in front of their rooms, which were properly labeled in a sense. In front of Leviathan's door was a kiddy sketch of her dragging Zero by his feet. In front of Harpuia's door was a sketch of him just looking angry and bitter. In front of Fefnir's door was a sketch of him running because he set himself on fire again.
"We're celebrities already." Fefnir said sarcastically.
By the time he said this, the other two had shut their doors. Fefnir shook his head and entered his room, except his door closed repeatedly on him as he was halfway through it, smashing him at least four times before he got through.
Upstairs, Zero was playing with a remote, laughing. "I'm so glad the security cameras caught that."
Later on, Leviathan, after taking a well-needed nap, decided to wander around the resistance base. She only hoped the resistance soldiers wouldn't get all giddly that another girl was in the place. Everyone seemed to be keeping themselves busy, on the lookout for any hostile forces and information gathering. She felt awkward here.
Suddenly, she noticed loud noise coming from nearby. At the end of the hall was a open room that had lights, loud music and TV. She decided to take a look.
Just as she peeked her head into the room, everything went silent and dark. Surprised, she went further into the room. Two steps, and the door slammed, making the room completely dark. The sound of the room went from silent to quick screaming, and in a few seconds, the room became active again.
Leviathan found herself hanging high in the room stuck in a net, while Zero was laying on his bed sipping some soda through a bendy straw, listening to some music blasting on his stereo. She wasn't surprised that Zero caught her in a net, but the look and feel of his room instead. Throughout his room were various model kits of planes, vehicles, and many many action figures, and more surprising, a lot of artwork. Disco lights surrounded the whole room. It gave everything an eerie crimson red feel. The only thing out of place was a tiny desk with some tools on it.
She freaked out when she saw a giant metallic skeleton next to her hanging from the ceiling, even though a price tag was clearly visible. Her attention then turned to the slurping of the red reploid chilling on his bed, which had a giant skull for a bedspread. Either Zero had the mindset of a teenager, which is kind of funny for a guy who is well over a hundred years old, or Ciel's various missions made him interested in death. Then again, the lyrics of the rock music playing in the room could have helped that.
"You really are a very very predictable lady," said the blonde in the middle of the room, still slurping his drink.
Leviathan grunted, trying to break free from the net. "Do you intend to do this every time I come into your room?"
Zero just pulled out a magazine called 'THINGS THAT GO BOOM' and started reading it, not looking at his hostage. "This happens to everyone who comes in my room without knocking."
Just on cue, footsteps nearby became louder, as another red armored reploid peeked his head into the room.
"Hey Leviathan, I'm lost. Where's the soda machine again? I'm thirs-" BONG
Fefnir was cut off as an anvil fell on his head, knocking him out. Leviathan just glared at Fef's unconsious body blankly as Zero turned the pages of his magazine acting like nothing ever happened.
Just then...
"Fefnir, did you steal my clothes again? I swear if I find coffee stains on my Skeletron shirt again I'm going to kick your aaaaaaaaaaaaa-!"
Harpuia found himself hanging by one leg tied on a rope, swinging him across the room. Sage just glared at Zero, going back and forth.
Zero continued turning the pages, his eyes glued to his magazine. "Um, yeah, there's a little sign on the door that says 'Knock Before Entering', and it doesn't say 'Please'. There's kinda a reason for that."
Harpuia continued staring at Zero. "I hate you so much."
Zero finally put the book down to see the three guests in his room; A tied-up Harpuia, a tied-up Leviathan, and huge-bump-on-his-head Fefnir.
"I should've done something like this when you guys were so desperate to get me. It would've saved me from all those long boring speeches you guys give on a regular basis. Such as...
'Neo Arcadia this and that! Bwah bwah bwah!'
'Don't die yet, Zero! I shall finish you off!'
'Zero, I am your father!' Wait, that wasn't one, but still, it was a lot of crap. Heard it all before." he finished.
Suddenly, a loud voice was heard outside the room.
"Zero! You have to try my new cookies!"
Zero screamed like a tiny girl and hid under his bed at the sound of Ciel's voice. Leviathan and Sage, still in their captured positions, raised an eyebrow.
"Except that," Zero claimed, "That is just plain sick, wrong, and evil!"
Ciel entered the room, moving from side to side dodging an anvil, blowtorch, and saw blade that Zero had hidden in his walls, all very casually. She knew where all the traps were and when they went off.
She peeked under the bed with her warm smile. "Zero, why are you hiding under the bed again?"
Zero's eyes were the only thing visible. "Your food hates me!"
She laughed, dragging him out from under the bed. "Don't worry, this time you won't start belching fire. Wait, was that when I cooked tuna salad or hamburger nachos? Well, whatever the case, I made hamburger nachos with cookies."
Zero looked mortified as he was dragged off, Leviathan and Sage waving at him, until he got an idea. He pulled out his chain and triple rod from near the door as he passed it.
The other resistance members looked in shock as Ciel was dragging Zero through the hallway, who was dragging Leviathan, Harpuia, and Fefnir in the hall with his two weapons. The triple rod was dragging Leviathan's net by the pole, and the hook attached to the rope Harpuia was still stuck to. The chain rod wrapped itself around Fefnir's leg. Some couldn't help but laugh at the sight.
Leviathan just stared at Zero, but he just gave out a sheepish grin.
"If this is how things end, I am so taking you all with me!" Zero yelled, letting out an evil laugh.
Funny how Ciel was dragging all of them onto another floor and wasn't paying attention to any of the dialogue behind her. She was just too excited to show Zero her cooking, again. She probably didn't even notice the company behind him.
When the five arrived in the kitchen, Ciel tossed Zero on a chair, but her eyes lit up as she noticed his luggage.
"You all decided to come and try my food, too? That's so sweet!"
Leviathan and Harpuia had mortified looks on their faces, while Fefnir was still unconscious. She released them of their ropes and nets and threw them onto chairs as well. For a small human girl, she was pretty strong, oddly enough. Leviathan almost wondered if Ciel was stronger than she was. If that were the case, she'd most definitely have to destroy her.
"Open wide!" Ciel yelled.
Within a second she crammed a cookie with nacho cheese and hamburger meat on it into each of their mouths, even Fefnir's.
Seconds later, Harpuia and Leviathan were fighting each other to see who would get into the bathroom first and throw up. They were slapping each other's hands like little kids, putting each other into headlocks and the like. Without realizing it, Zero just walked right in and did what he had to do. As he got out, he started panting like a dog, with his tongue out and rapid breathing.
"I'll be tasting that for a week..." Zero said with absolute disgust, his face turning pale.
Shortly after, he found himself in the bathroom again, coming out a minute later and spraying a lot of breathmint into his mouth. Noticing this, Levi and Harp decided to stop fighting, but just as Harpuia was about to reach the door, Levi pushed him to the ground and locked the door. Sage could barely hold it in any longer, his face turning blue.
Leviathan gloated inside after her victory. After she was done spitting the poison cookie out from her mouth and system, she started working on her makeup, in which she always whistled a specific tune. She was clearly teasing Sage.
Hearing what he called 'Levi's-working-on-her-freaking-makeup-again' tune, Sage, in a desperate attempt, ripped the door open, using it to throw Levi straight out of there, and put it back onto the hatch to give himself some privacy as he also vomited the poison cookie from his digestive system.
Like Zero, they both panted like dogs, tongues hanging out with rapid breathing, shortly after applying their own spray mint. They feared Ciel more than ever, if not her cooking. Who ever thought someone could turn a mere cookie into a complete abomination? Forget the Ciel system and everything else that girl created, her cooking was the weapon of mass destruction.
Meanwhile, an unconscious Fefnir still sat at the kitchen table with a Nacho Hamburger Garlic Pepper Salmon Marinara Onion cookie halfway crammed through his mouth, and drool covering his shoulder.
And this was just the first day of living in the base. As much as they hated to admit it, both Sage and Levi knew if Zero survived under these conditions, he had to be the legendary reploid.
Later that night, just as Leviathan applied her moisturizer on and brushed her teeth at least eight times, she heard cartoons from Zero's room. She recognized it as one of her favorites, the reploid chick who could do anything, from save the world, get dates, and kick some serious booty, the girl known as "Alia Crimson!" She hadn't seen that show in forever!
She dashed her way towards Zero's room, wearing little more than sandals, some pajamas and an oversized shirt, but paused at the entrance of his door, which was still wide open. She was surprised she hadn't noticed the several 'Knock First' signs around the door, and a welcome mat with a skull on it. Taking caution, she knocked three times.
Zero's eyes were glued to one of his favorite cartoons. He didn't respond.
Leviathan, not knowing what else to do, just shrugged and walked in. She did knock after all, right?
Suddenly, her body froze in place as electrical beams trapped her wrists and feet in place.
Zero raised the volume of his TV. "You didn't say the password."
Leviathan just whined and mumbled everything that came into her mind. On the bright side, she had a clear view of the TV.
"Are they still teasing about Alia and her sidekick Brad getting together?" she asked.
"They've been doing that the entire season." Zero replied.
"Why can't they just make them go out together? I mean, she's a smart pretty girl who can kick butt, sing, drive, and make a perfect omelet, and he's just plain funny, goofy, and kinda hot."
"Because it'll end the series. Some people on the internet are going to complain that they wanted her to go out with her arch-rival, or the guy she went out with previously, and then there are those who want to see them together but will riot if the show ends. But you know what'll happen. Series finale, she'll find some guy she likes more than Brad, it'll get him jealous, turns out the new perfect boyfriend is some evil villian in disguise, she and Brad take him out, and within three minutes, she falls for him, kisses him, and that's it, the end, with no explanation why she did any of that, but people will like it anyway because they're able to use their imaginations to make up stories and they'll still be happy that they hooked up."
Leviathan was speechless. Who ever thought Zero knew so much about this cartoon, let alone one of her favorite shows?
He continued, "Well, at least it's not like some of those shows that have one hundred episodes and the lead villian gets away in half of those episodes and it all seems to be endless. Can't stand those. Blah. Unless of course, they split it in chapters or something to give it some variety instead of one long neverending chapter."
There was silence as the show continued, and when it came to an end, Zero turned off his TV.
"Show's over, good night."
The electrical beams turned off, throwing Leviathan out of Zero's room, and his door closed, and what sounded like ten other doors closing behind it, followed by at least fifteen locks. Leviathan, tired, decided to go to retire for the night.
Oddly enough, in the kitchen, a snoring Fefnir still had Nacho Hamburger Garlic Pepper Salmon Marinara Onion cookie halfway crammed through his mouth.
Man, do I have some evil plans for everyone coming soon. I thought I'd be done with this fic by now, but I guess not. Awaiting reviews as always. Yippie ki yay!