I am sooo sorry for taking so long to update. If it hadn't been for willowrose1616 who pretty much gave me a kick in the butt, I wouldn't have even remembered I still haven't finished this fic. Thanks!

Disclaimer: no I don't' own Buffy or any of the other characters.

&&&&&&&&&&&&

On his way to the magic shop that night, right before he went on patrol, he though about the dream he had while he sleep during the day. It started out like every other dream he had since the night Buffy died. He saved Buffy every time in his other dreams, but this time he didn't save her. It happened just like it did that night on the tower, except for one thing. Tara died. And he killed her. He couldn't remember how or why, all he could remember was that he did.

By the time he got to the magic shop, everyone else was there. "Evenin' all. How are we set-up tonight?"

Willow looked up at him, she seemed as if she was pleased to see him. "I think all of us are going except Tara and dawn. Unless Anya and Xander want to back out, he did have a close call last night." Spike looked at her closely. It seemed as though she was blushing. He shook it off and clamed it on the lighting.

And leave you alone with Vamp-Boy?" asked Xander coming up behind them. "I don't think so."

"What's wrong Whelp? 'Fraid I'm gonna hurt poor Red?"

"No! I know you can't hurt her, but you can let her get hurt."

"Yeah, right. If I was gonna do that, why didn't' I do that last night?"

"...I don't know... But you let Buffy die and she was the one you were obsessed with."

For once Spike didn't have a comeback. Genuine hurt was on his face for about two seconds before it turned into rage.

Xander knew he went too far as soon as the words left his mouth. All of a sudden he wasn't on his feet anymore. He was on the floor with a throbbing pain in his jaw and some blood dripping down his face. He looked up to see Spike coming toward him.

Spike leaned down, grabbed Xander by the collar and lifted him off the ground. Xander watched in terror as Spike vamped out and prepared to rip hi throat out.

Spike had just put his fangs against Xander's when he heard Dawn shriek, "Spike!!!"

He turned and saw fear all over her face. The room reeked of it.

Spike threw Xander to the floor and ran out of the magic box. Anya rushed to Xander's side.

"Shit," Dawn said before she took off out the door to follow Spike.

Xander pulled himself up off the floor. "We have to go after her. NO telling what Spike will do now that the chip's out."

Willow put a hand on Xander's shoulder. "I don't think Spike will hurt her, he was closer to Dawn than he was to any of us."

"Yeah, when he wasn't able to make her into a happy meal. Think about it Wills.

"Xander's right" said Anya, clearly taking Xander's side. "Spike hasn't been able to enjoy a decent vampire meal in over a year. It's like placing a glass of a very fine, very intoxicating wine in the hand of an alcoholic. Do you really think he won't take a drink?"

((A/N:: I was going to have Xander say it all, but I figured he wasn't smart enough lol))

"...Alright." Said Willow, "Grab a few weapons. If he's hurt her, he'll be begging to be placed in the deepest pits of hell before I'm through with him."

Dawn had spotted Spike running in the direction of the cemetery and assumed he was heading toward his crypt.

Sure enough, as soon as she got to his crypt door she heard banging and yelling. She rushed inside, thinking Spike was being attacked.

She let out a sigh of relief when she entered and seen that he wasn't being attacked but was just venting his anger by yelling and throwing objects around the room. She let out a yelp when a bear bottle crashed into the wall by her head.

Spike jerked his head in the direction of the sound and noticed the beer and glass that was splattered and shattered by her head. "Sorry 'bout that Bit." She could tell that he had been drinking, but wasn't quite drunk yet.

"S'ok." She said, and then hesitated before asking, "Spike, what happened back there?"

He moved very close to her, his face right in front of hers. "Are you scared of me, Bit?"

"No Spike, I-"

He cut her off. "Are you sure you can trust me not that the chip's out?"

"Yes Spike, I'd trust you with my life." "Then you would trust me..." he pulled her hair back, away from her neck, "to put my fangs on your neck and not bite?"

Her answer was immediate. "Yes."

He looked closely at her, searching, but not finding, any fear. The only thing he could sense was trust, love, and devotion. He vamped out and stoked her neck with his finger. He could hear her heartbeat quicken, but it was only from the sensation, he still smelled no fear. He put his head down and gently placed his fangs on the side of her throat. Her heart was pounding. He could hear her rich, thick blood moving through the veins just under her skin.

He had positioned himself so she could pull away if he accidentally hurt her, but nothing was stopping him from putting his arms around the girl and drinking her dry. Nothing, except his love for the girl (which he could have put aside if he wanted to), and his promise to Buffy.

He was about to pull away and slip back into his human guise when the door burst open and the scoobies seen him, vamped out and extremely close to Dawn's neck.

"I told you! I told you he wouldn't care who was his first meal."

Willow used her magic to pull dawn away from Spike. "No! Wait! You don't understand!" Dawn tried to explain.

"Don't worry dawn, everything's going to be ok" Xander said as he lifted his ax and went towards Spike.

Spike growled. He knew there was nothing he could say to make them stop. "Come on now Whelp, you sure you wanna do that? I can fight back now, you know."

Xander didn't' answer, he just nervously gripped his weapon. "How long has it stopped working Spike? How long have you been feeding, killing innocents?" He took a swing at Spike's middle, which Spike easily avoided.

"Put the ax down before you hurt yourself." Xander didn't speak, he just took another swing at Spike. "Stop! I don't' want to hurt you... Oh Bloody hell, there's something I never thought I'd say." Said spike as he ducked another blow from Xander's ax, then grabbed the handle as Xander swung the ax again.

When Willow seen Spike getting close to Xander, she used a spell to pull him away and hold him in place.

While willow was distracted by Spike, Dawn ran in front of him as Xander swung the ax and Spike's neck. "No stop!" Willow seen that Xander would hurt Dawn as well so she stopped the ax with magic in mid-swing. Dawn grabbed the opening of Spike's coat so that if Willow tried the spell on her again she wouldn't be able to leave Spike. "Dawn, why are you trying to protect him when he was just about to kill you?"

"But he wasn't trying to kill me!"

"Then what was he doing all vampy and close to your neck?" Xander asked getting into the argument.

"He asked me if I trust him... If I'd trust him not to bite me."

"And you did?! How could you trust him? He was trying to kill us for years!" this also came from Xander, Willow was staying quiet, taking in the situation and the conversation and thinking carefully.

"IF he's as blood thirsty as you say then why isn't he trying to kill me right now?"

"Dawn, we have to stop him before he kills anymore innocents then he already has."

Spike tried to pull out of Willow's magical grip. "I haven't killed anybody! Not since before I got the sodding chip."

"Yeah right. I bet you didn't' even go an hour after learning that it stopped working, and you found that out how long ago?"

"Last night during patrol." The argument was now just between Xander and Spike.

"Yeah, right. I bet you knew months ago."

IF I did, then why are you still alive? If I was to kill anyone I know you'd be first on my list."

"...Then why aren't you trying to kill me?"

I already told you... I don't' want to."

"Why?"

Spike rolled his eyes. "I don't know. I just don't." He tried to look at Willow, but the spell wouldn't let him. "Hey Red, how 'bout undoing you little spell here?" She hesitated a moment, but then took it off. Spike put his hands on dawn's shoulders and whispered in her ear, "Thank you, but you didn't have to do that."

She turned to look at him. "Yes I did, Spike. I don't know what I'd do if you weren't around anymore."

He smiled at her and gently before turning to look at the others. "I've been fighting with you guys for almost half a year." That's about how long it had been since the night Buffy died, "I risk my neck almost every night, putting up with you" he pointed to Xander "shit and as soon as my mind is cleared you don't trust me."

Willow was messing with her fingernails nervously. "Well, when you didn't have the chip before you were always trying to kill us. Not to mention all the death threats you gave while you had the chip. And if you never got it I'd be dead right now."

"...I'm not the same as I was then."

NO on said anything for a while until Anya spoke up. "So, now what? Can we trust Spike or do we still have to kill him?" "Or we could just make him leave Sunnydale so we don't have to deal with him." said Xander

"No, there is no way I'm leaving. I made a promise to Buffy... that I'd protect Dawn and the only way I can do that is with your trust. So if you don't' trust me, you might as well kill me right now." his spread his arms open a little bit to show he would put up no fight.

"I can deal with that. Let me do it." This obviously came from Xander.

"Xander stop it," said Willow, "I think he's serious."

"So? I-"

Willow cut him off "Stop!" then she turned to look at the vamp. "... I trust you Spike."

"So do I," Said Tara coming up and putting her hand on Willow's arm.

He glanced at Tara "Then why did you come here?" Spike asked, looking back at Willow

"I... I was scared. I knew you wouldn't, but..."

"But you had to come and see for yourself." Spike finished.

Willow looked down ashamed, "Yes."

"And when you seen me so close to Dawn, you thought your suspicions were true."

She nodded sadly, "I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "I'd never hurt Dawn, ... but I probably would have thought the same thing in your place."

The all were quiet... again.

"... so... I don't get to kill him?" Asked Xander after the silence got to heavy.

"No, sorry. Maybe next time," Spike said, almost teasingly.

Anya, who was now bored and didn't particularly want to watch them go at it again, said, "Come on Xander. Let's go home and have wild crazy sex." He followed Anya out with a bright red face.

Spike shook his head then turned to the three remaining females in his crypt. "So what are you guys going? Are you going to stay here a while or go on home?"

Dawn's eyes lit up, "Can we stay Willow, please?"

"I don't think so Dawn. You have school in the morning."

"But Willow..."

"I have and idea," Spike said, "how 'bout I walk yo8u three home?"

"Yeah! Can he Willow, please?"

"Sure, he can make sure we don't run into any nasties."

When they left his crypt, Willow and Tara were in front of Dawn and Spike, both groups were in conversation, but Spike noticed Willow looking back and giving him a small smile. He dismissed it as her still feeling guilty about what happened.

"Did you mean what you said?" spike looked over and seen Dawn looking at the ground.

"Ev'ry word. I'll be dust before I'd let anything happen to you." He put his arm around you and kissed the top of her head.

They headed for home in silence.

&&&&&&&&&&&

That was it.... I hope you enjoyed it. I'll try to post the next chapter soon, but I can't make any promises. Please don't forget to review. It'd make me one happy writer. Thanks for Reading!